A Mothers View
She's more then a little surprised when Finn returns home from McKinley and asks if he can have his old room back for a little bit longer.
"How long is a little but longer?" she asks him softly. "I thought you'd be flying back to New York with Rachel tonight."
Finn grimaces a little. "Look, mom, I'm really tired and I just need to go to bed and sleep. But I'll talk to you about it tomorrow or something, I promise."
'Talking about it tomorrow' turns into not talking about it at all and avoiding all conversation to do with New York and Rachel unless it somehow involves talking about how Kurt seemed when he was in New York. This means that in an attempt to understand whatever her son is going through, she has to go behind his back and ask the only other source. Rachel. She still had the younger brunettes number on her phone from when they were planning the wedding, so she hesitantly makes the phone call.
"Hello, Kurt Hummel speaking," is the answer she gets. Strange, considering she called Rachel and not her younger son.
"Kurt? Why are you answering Rachel's phone?"
"Oh, Carole? Hi. Rachel and I are screening each others calls because news has gotten around to the rest of the club, old and the current seniors about the break ups and we don't feel like talking about them," Kurt explains in all of one breath.
But wait, what break ups? And plural? As in more then one?
"Look, I don't know what Finn's told you, but Rachel did the right thing, even if he doesn't see it yet. And I'm getting over Blaine, there are lots of cute guys here in New York. But thanks for ringing. I had better go before Rachel sees me talking on her phone. Bye, love you." Kurt hangs up, leaving her with more questions then answers.
She doesn't broach the subject with Finn since she knows he has coping mechanisms that work out for him most of the time, and she realizes that he has to find an answer to his own problems, whatever they might be.
When he comes home from the tire shop, humming something under his breath. A first since before he'd graduated. "Why are you so happy?"
"Mr. Schue's leaving for D.C. to head up some Performing Arts council and he asked me to run the glee club and direct the musical while he's gone." He's grinning so brightly that his happiness is infectious.
"That's great Finn. What musical are you doing this year?"
"Grease. It was even my suggestion to." Finn moves around the kitchen, piling food into his arms before turning to head back upstairs. "This feels really good mom. Like I'm actually doing something right."
"I'm glad sweetie."
Opening night for the musical comes around before she knows it; she's walking through the familiar halls of McKinley High School.
"I thought this is what you wanted," she hears Finn say from around the corner. He must be in his office, talking to one of the cast members. "I thought you wanted me to stand up and be a man. For me to be more like Brody."
"I never wanted you to be like Brody, Finn. I want you to be the best version of you, and I must've thought somewhere, that you'd be that person if you grew up," Rachel replies. "But maybe it's not just you that needs to grow up. Maybe I need to do some more growing up myself. I'm sorry Finn. I'm so sorry." The sound of heels clicking down the hallway echoes loudly.
"We could've done it you know," Finn calls out. "We could've made it work. But you just gave up on me and you gave up on us. I never pegged you for a quitter Rachel."
"What would you have done in New York, Finn?" Rachel retorts harshly. "Work at the nearest garage; work at the corner store or at some coffee shop? How is that any better then what you'd be doing here?How is that any better then the life Quinn wanted for you? You gave me my freedom, now I'm giving you yours. You'll thank me for it eventually."
The footsteps continue until she can no longer hear them. Then she hears the bang a fist going into a solid metal locker.
"I don't want to talk about it mom," Finn says when she walks around the corner.
"You just punched a locker. It's as good a time as any."
"Except that I don't want to talk about it. The shows about it start anyway, so you should probably find your seat." Finn turns and walks in the opposite direction to Rachel.
Rachel and New York become taboo topics over the dinner table after the musical. If she and Burt ever Skype Kurt's it's when he's called them to tell them that Rachel isn't home so they can talk. As they talk to Kurt, she can see from the way he moves around the apartment he shares with Rachel and so easily walks into her bedroom to pick out the outfit that he wants her to wear when they go shopping the next day.
"How's everything going?" Burt asks once Kurt's stopped moving around. "You doing alright, not working to hard?"
Kurt shrugs. "I'm fine, and I need to work hard because if I do then maybe Isabelle will look at some of my designs. Thank god Diva's been working lately, otherwise I'd never be able to buy all the material I need to finish off some of my designs."
"Rachel's working?"
"Yup. One of her NYADA friends got her an interview and an audition so she's been working herself to the bone. But it's Rachel Berry so we really shouldn't have thought anything else. But anyway, how's Finn?"
They continue talking until it's nearly midnight and Kurt's door slides open and a blond haired man steps into view while a brown man carries Rachel in his arms, her head resting on his shoulder, her face an unhealthy pale color.
"Holy crap, what the hell happened? Is she alright?" Kurt asks when he sees the two men. Neither answers as they make their way to Rachel's room. Kurt leaves the picture but they can still hear everything.
"She was roofied," one man says. "I swear I turned my back on her for a moment, and the next she was all sleepy and whatever. I told Brody and we got her the hell out."
"Then why does she look like death warmed up?" Kurt spits out.
There's a deafening silence between the boys. "Because she's been drinking. It was a few shots to help her forget about Ms. July being on her case, but she's a lightweight."
Kurt snorts. "You let a girl who's barely five feet, drink shots and get roofied. Have you been sleeping with a certain someone Brody? Because that seems to be the only logical explanation I have as to why you've just paid a visit to stupid land."
"You told me to take her out and get her to relax so you could talk to your family. Don't turn the tables on me here Kurt." The other man, Brody, says. "I'm sorry that this has happened, but she's in college now and sometimes being a girl in college means you get a little drunk-"
"She's passed out Brody! And she's been drugged! Do I really need to add 'keep her safe' to the list of things I need to tell you to do."
There's a sigh and a groan. "Dibs the couch."
"Not happening tonight. You want to go and get my best friend drunk and drugged and you don't get to stay here."
"Dude!"
"Nope, Cooper, get out. You to Brody."
"You really want to deal with a hung-over Rachel come tomorrow morning? Because after last weekend I thought it would be a no go zone."
"Cooper," Kurt says with a supper sweet voice, "you're more then welcome to come over first thing tomorrow morning and help me deal with Rachel. You're just not staying here tonight. OUT, both of you."
The two men step back into view then leave through the open door. Kurt returns to his computer, a glum expression on his face.
"Is Rachel alright?"
"She's fine."
"Who were those two guys?"
"Just two of Rachel's friends from NYADA who took her under their wing when she first started school. They are good guys, most of the time. And they can get Rachel out and about even though she'd rather be practicing. I had better go, get some sleep in before Rachel wakes up. I love you both, and we'll talk again soon."
The screen goes black and Burt turns to look at her. "I never thought Rachel would be the one coming home drunk, with two guys. And I never though Kurt would let her go willingly."
"People change I guess."
With Kurt home for Christmas, the mood is a lot lighter then it had been in several weeks. At least since she had overheard Finn and Rachel's conversation. Finn could put on a brave face, but they all knew that he was hurting more then anyone thought possible.
"What's going on Finn?" she asks him on Christmas Eve. "Every other time you've broken up with Rachel, it's never been this bad."
He shrugs. "Last time she was still fighting for us, even when she was with Jesse. This time she's the one doing the giving up and I can't go through her turning me down again."
She pulls him into a hug. "Maybe she's just giving you space."
"She's not. I heard you talking with Kurt a few weeks ago. The night that Rachel was drugged. Brody, the guy who carried her in, is the guy she kissed before I showed up in New York. He's been on Broadway and everything."
"Is that why you came back?" She wants to know, so she can help him since he's clearly not coping well, but pushing Finn to far when he doesn't want to talk to anyone about it, will just end in disaster. Unless it's Rachel, who seemed to have a strange ability to get Finn to respond even when he was refusing to talk.
"I came back because I was scared of the person Rachel was becoming. She looked so different, she has these new friends that were exactly like her, she had Brody who she just seemed to act naturally around and I was scared that I wasn't good enough for her. I guess that's always been the problem. One of us thinking that we're not good enough for the other. God," he groans. "Why am I only realizing this now?"
She doesn't have an explanation for him other then that love is complicated when you're young and just out of high school and have no idea what you want to do with your life.
Will comes back a few weeks before Regionals for the week in order to help Finn prep for the big competition, then proceeds to exile him for that week so that Finn can get some down time over the Valentine's day week since Regionals and the aftermath will be exhausting. Finn gets home that day, tells her that he's visiting Quinn in New Haven with Santana and Puck, packs a bag then leaves.
He comes back a week later, talking excitedly about how much he likes college life, and how he's so glad that Santana kicked his but into action when she heard he hadn't applied to anywhere even though he was taking the year off.
"What do you mean you applied to college?" she asks excitedly.
Finn laughs and wraps his arms around her. "Exactly that. I applied to college mom. Me. Finn Hudson. I actually really want to go to college. Last year I was so focused on Rachel's dreams that I never really thought properly about what college would be like for me, especially since both she and Kurt were hell bent on going to a performing arts school and I really couldn't see myself at a school like that."
"So then you've decided what you want to be then?" Maybe he wanted to be a teacher. Or something like that.
Finn makes a face. "Not exactly. I know what I want to be; only I have so many things I'd like to try. But Quinn and Santana told me that sometimes you can wait a while to decide on a major so you can chose something you're really interested in. I knew that already, but being at an actual college, made it seem real."
"Finn, that's great. Where did you apply to?"
Another shrug. "Schools here there and anywhere. Keeping my options open and all."
"Well I'm proud of you, Finn. Let me know if you here from any of them alright."
Finn just smiles at her.
With Finn out of the house most of the time with Puck who just moved into a new apartment and Regionals only two weeks away, she doesn't get a chance to see him other then if she stops by the shop to drop off lunch and he's in there working on his pet project with Ryder and Jake. So when she walks in and hears his booming laugh, she assumes that he's mucking around with them.
"A what week?" he's asking into his phone. "How does that even work? Some of your playlists have over a hundred songs on them. I should know, I have them on my iPod." Finn turns around and waves at her while his phone was pressed to his ear. "Well you are a music hoarder. I'm joking, I'm joking. But seriously, how do you fit fourteen people singing five songs into one week. We'd have to have, like, fourteen songs a day, and glee only goes for an hour and a half, plus I have to get in Regionals rehearsals as well. There just won't be enough time for it all." He pauses for a few moments before letting out a sigh. "Yeah, I know. I'll call you later. Bye."
"Who was that?" she asks. Since his return from New Haven, Finn had seemed reenergized whenever she talked to him and knew he was determined to get his team to Nationals that happened to be in New York again.
"Oh just a friend. What are you doing here? Do you have lunch?"
Of all the things that have changed in the recent months, her sons eating habits had not changed at all. "Yes, I brought lunch. Does this friend have a name?"
"Yes, but it's not important."
"So then it must be important."
"Look, they're just a friend and that's all they're going to be for a while." She can hear the frustration in Finn's voice and she knows how hard it must be for him since Rachel's moved on with her life yet he's stuck in the same town with the same people that know everything about it him, and unable to forget the girl who he was going to marry.
"You can move on Finn. If what Kurt's told me is true, then Rachel certainly has." Not that she gossiped about Rachel with Kurt, but she did know that Rachel had started seeing the blond guy that had been there the night she got drugged. Cooper or something she thought his name was.
"I'm not looking for that again mom. I'm concentrating on myself at the moment, and my friend is just a friend. But if you're really curious, her name is Cassie."
The glee club win Regionals and Finn comes home early to celebrate with Kurt who finally has another night off. This time, they can all hear Rachel in the background, pottering around in the kitchen singing some show tune while Kurt talks about his job and how Isabelle looked at his designs and loved them.
For the most part, the conversation flows and it almost seems like everyone's together again. The only problem they encountered had been Rachel ducking into Kurt's room to take his dinner dishes. She, Burt and Kurt had all frozen when Rachel appeared on screen, then tried to look at Finn who seemed fine with it although his eyes were trained on her. She smiles at them before leaving the room. Minutes later, Finn excuses himself so he can head home.
She likes Cassie already. They haven't met or anything and she doesn't know what she looks like, but she knows that Finn must like her because he's always talking to her, or about her and he's always smiling now. Burt notices to, and brings it up one day over dinner.
"I haven't seen a smile like that on his face since Rachel, this time last year."
"It's strange isn't it? I was so worried that he'd get all hung up on the break-up like he did last time, but he seems to really be moving on."
Finn gets his first acceptance letter two weeks after Regionals and he's ecstatic. It's OSU and he's gotten into a music program there with half a scholarship, but he really doesn't mind. And honestly she doesn't care either because her baby got accepted into college with a scholarship.
The next letter comes from the University of Michigan, it's another acceptance letter, no scholarship though, but he's still happy and she's still proud of him.
The University of Northwestern Ohio and the University of Dayton accept him a few days later.
"Which one are you going to chose?" Burt asks holding each of the letters up.
"I'm not sure. I'm still waiting for two more schools to get back to me. Maybe then I'll be able to decide."
Finn disappears. He'd been over at Puck's late one night, left the next morning, then vanished. She called Kurt, who then activated what he called 'The New Directions Emergency Phone Tree', but no one had heard anything from Finn in days.
"So you have no idea where he could be?" she asks, trying not to panic. But her son is missing and that should be reason enough to panic.
"No, I'm sorry Carole. But I really have to go. If I hear anything I'll let you know straight away, I promise." Rachel hangs up and Carole lets out a sigh.
"Honey, he's been gone for day. I'm sure, soon enough; someone will hear from him and tell us that he's fine." Burt assures her.
"My son is missing, Burt. I don't care how long it's been, but he's gone and he won't answer any of my calls, or Kurt's or yours or Rachel's and I'm allowed to be worried for my son!"
"Our son," Burt corrects. She whips her head around to her husband, frowning. "Finn's my son as well, therefore he's our son. And our son will be fine."
Burt's right, of course. Finn comes home five days later and he's fine, physically. Mentally, however, is a whole other issue.
"Are you insane?" she yells, when he breaks the news. "You've done some stupid things Finn Christopher Hudson, putting your fiancée on train the day of your wedding being one of them, joining the army and shooting yourself in the thigh is another. But this, this takes the cake."
"Mom," Finn begins. "I'm sorry, but it just felt right. Nothing you say is going to change what I've done. If it had been something 'crazy' like get a tattoo or whatever you wouldn't have a problem with it. But if I follow my heart and do what I know is right, then everyone gets all pissed off."
"Finn! You eloped with the girl you swore to me was a friend; you told me that she was just a friend and now you're married to her! I liked the girl well enough because you seemed happier, but marrying her? Really Finn?" She's furious. Her son got married without her there and he's not even guilty.
Finn groans. "I want to get married last year and it's a bad idea even though everyone knows that Rachel and I love each other, so I wait a year and elope with a girl who makes me happier then I've been in months and everyone still tells me it's a bad idea because I don't love her enough. I'm sorry that I'm failing to make good decisions bout my love life."
"Finn, does Cassie make you happier then Rachel made you?"
"Mom," Finn warns.
"Finn you can't project your emotions onto someone else. We both know that you love Rachel, still, and how is that fair for anyone."
Finn tiredly rubs his eyes. "Mom, I know I made the right decision in the long run. And until you accept my decision and I know for sure that you won't attack my wife then you won't meet her." Finn storms off to his bedroom, leaving Carole alone with her thoughts. Her son got married. He eloped. Oh dear god, she was getting old.
Finn avoids her and Burt for most of the week, claiming he has Nationals to prepare for, and a wife to look after. He hasn't moved out yet, claiming that they'll move in together once he's not so busy with Nationals.
"Please tell me she's legal Finn," Burt all but begs over their mandatory Friday night dinner.
"She's legal. Promise."
"Then I give you my kind of blessing."
Two sets of eyes turn to her, expectantly. "I give my blessing to."
"Great, it means a lot to me that you guys gave me your blessing, I just need you to approve."
Apparently she and Burt aren't the only Finn's refusing to let meet Cassie. Kurt calls complaining one day that Rachel is grumpy because she heard the name 'Cassie' and all she can think of is Finn marrying her dance teacher, and it's not as if he can prove her wrong because Finn's banned him from Lima until he knows that Kurt won't go all crazy on her. Also, according Kurt not even Puck knows Cassie personally.
"You don't think that she's a serial killer do you?"
She laughs on her end. "Finn may like the crazy type, but I don't think he'd marry a serial killer."
Finn asks her to come to New York with him for Nationals. It's not like they need the supervision since Coach Bieste, and Coach Sylvester are going with the club, and Will's meeting them with Ms. Pillsbury once they get to New York, so she's not really sure why he'd want them with him.
They have the rooms booked though, and she cannot turn down the opportunity to see Kurt so they agree and the next week they're leaving for New York.
New Directions comes in first place again which means that the kids get to go to their rooms and celebrate while all the adults go out for dinner. Except Finn drags them away from dinner and into a waiting taxi. He hands over a little slip of paper and grins at the driver.
They pull to a stop outside a large apartment building.
"What are we doing here Finn?" she asks, surprised.
"I couldn't take you to the place we're going tomorrow because it would take to long for a quick visit, so I thought I'd bring you here, to the next best thing." He replies, getting out of the car then helping Carole out as well. "There's someone I want you to meet."
"Cassie?" She asks excitedly, though she's pretty confused about why they're outside a New York apartment. "You didn't tell me she lives in New York."
"She doesn't live here," Finn says.
"Then where are we?" Burt asks.
Finn shrugs and drags them into the building, then up the stairs right to the top floor. "Think of it this way Burt, the exercise will do you good." He chuckles to himself and they continue climbing. Once they finally reach the top, Carole sees a familiar looking door. From the door, she can hear laughter that she knows all to well.
"Finn?"
"After you," he replies, opening the door for them. Inside, Kurt's sitting on the couch with Brody and the other guy, while Rachel's in the little kitchen area flitting around the kitchen, clearly cooking something if the smells were anything to go by.
Kurt leaps up when he sees them and runs into his father's arms, then they swap and Kurt's hugging her tightly.
"I'm so glad you're here! Welcome to our humble abode. It's changed a bit since our last Skype session since my dear brother forgot to mention that he was moving in with us and we don't have much more room now that Santana's moving in as well."
Finn just laughs from behind them, and Rachel even lets out a giggle as she put down the dish she'd been cooking with. Its then that Carole notices the ring. The stunning engagement ring that was nestled on her left hand, on the ring finger. The band underneath it the smaller, more feminine version of Finn's wedding band.
"I found it when I was in Georgia, at some antique shop for a good price," Finn explains while Rachel moves to stand next to Finn. "Saw it and thought of her."
"And they call me the hopeless romantic," Rachel jokes easily. "I'm sorry we didn't tell you."
"We just wanted something that was between the two of us, even if that meant we had to lie to everyone," Finn adds. "I'm coming to school here in the fall. When I got my letter I got the first flight to New York and told Rachel, and here we are."
"Back as we were," Rachel adds. "Only better, because we've finally got it figured out."
Finn grins down at her, then looks up to smirk at Kurt who turns around and joins the other two on the couch.
"As long as you're both happy Finn. That's all that matters to me."
Rachel and Finn exchange a look. "We're happy, mom. Happier then I've ever been."
And really, that's all a mother can ask for.