"Dunder-Mifflin, This is Pam"

"Pam this is Dwight. I am ill. i will not be in today." Pam tried not to laugh. Dwight never missed a day. She snapped her fingers, and frantically waved her hands to get Jim's attention. She put the phone on Speaker.

"What are your symptons, Dwight?" Pam asked. Jim laughed.

"I have vomited. I am dizzy. Also i am bloated."

"Those are all symptoms of Pregnancy, Dwight." Jim tried so hard not to laugh.

"Was that Jim? why can he hear me? Take me off speaker now Pam!" Dwight scolded. Pam pressed a number, to sound as if she had actually taken him off speaker.

"OK Dwight, I'll tell Micheal your not coming in"

"Tell him that i will stop by his place tonight so we can still watch Dancing with the Stars." Dwight said quickly. Jim was about to burst with laughter. Pam began to giggle.

"all right Dwight, i will. I hope you feel better. Bye." She hung up. Jim smacked his hands on the desk and started laughing. The phone rang again. Pam looked at the caller ID.

"Oh My God. Its Angela. You don't think..."

"answer it!" Jim hurried her. Pam picked up the phone.

"Dunder-Mifflin, This is Pam"

"Hi Pam, Its Angela. I have a..Family problem. So today, i wont be in. Thank you,Good bye" Angela hung up. Pam set down the phone back on its receiver. She started laughing.

"What? Who was it?" Jim leaned up onto the desk. Pam looked cute when she laughed, that was for sure.

"It was Angela. She called in also. oh my god."

"It could be just a coincidence" Jim paused. "But From what I've learned from Dwight. If you aren't certain, Investigate." Pam's face lit up when she heard the plan. How could she refuse? She had been trying to figure out the mystery for months now, Could she finally come to a conclusion? She couldn't pass up such a chance.

"I could get Ryan to cover my shift. What about you?" Pam pushed back her chair and stood up.

"Do you honestly think i need to worry about that?" Jim smiled. Pam agreed. This company was so slow.

Both of them snick out of the office with ease. the only person in on the 'investigation' was Ryan. he really didn't care. Both of them scurried to her car. If Micheal saw them,they were busted. They got into Pam's car quick.

Pam's car was nice. Noting special. But nice. He glanced at the back seat. He was relieved. Every girl he knows always has clothes, shoes and trash scattered all of the back seat. Pam's was tidy, it smelled nice too. She had 2 air fresheners, both of the same scent. Smart. She put the keys in the ignition and started up the car. But just as quickly she turned it off.

"What are we going to do?" Pam sat back at look at Jim. He looked down at his feet,trying to think of an idea.

"Well we could call Dwight. Posing as a Telemarketer or something. To see how he reacts. If he attempts to hurry it up, he may be 'in the middle of something'."

"Oh god, ew. Don't make me think of something so wrong. But its a brilliant idea. I might have his number in my address book." Pam reached over Jim and opened up the glove compartment.Jim became fidgety, Pam was 2 inches from he crotch.Jim knew he was being disgusting,but then again how could he help himself.It was Pam!

She was a little embarrassed at first, she had forgotten she had kept a box of tampons in her glove compartment just in case. She quickly grabbed the address book, she hope Jim hadn't seen. But to her dismay he had, but he was cool with it. He wasn't one to freak out over lame things. She flipped through the thick book. Dwight's name was no where to be found. Which wasn't all too alarming, when ever did she actually have to call Dwight? it wasn't like she actually saw him out of the office except for once, but she had made sure there was no eye contact. The creepy thing about the situation was he saw him in a Victoria secret store, by himself, just drooling over the manicans in the scandially-clad outfits.

"I most defiantly do not have Dwight K. Schrute's number in my address book. Do you have it?"

"Not on me. But i do at my house. In my address book. Its not like i actually want to know what it is" Jim laughed. As did Pam. "My house is only a minute from here, and its more comfortable than a car. No a offense. But, we could eat lunch or something." Jim put on his seat belt. Pam would rather sit in a comfy apartment than her tiny car. Jim's House was unlike Roy's old apartment before they got a house together. Roy's was always messy, nothing was on the walls and there were mounds of disgusting dirty dishes in and next to the sink. Jim's actually had artwork on the walls, he used his dish washer on a regular basis and everything was were it was supposed to be.

Pulling into Jim's driveway, Pam could already tell the house was going to clean. The lawn was mowed. Good Sign of a clean house in her book. She parked the car, UN-locked the doors and they both got out. Jim walked ahead of her so he could UN-lock the door.

"Are your ready for my house and all its glory? i didn't think you are." Jim unlocked the door and walked inside. He flipped the light switch, so she could get a better look at the apartment. She was right, it was nice. Everything was in its place. And it actually smelled good as well, he must have had a glad plug-in. If only Roy were this way.

Jim walked into the Kitchen and grabbed the phone book that was next to his phone. He opened it up on the counter, searching for Dwight's name. It wasn't all to hard. He was the only Schrute in the county. Not all to surprising.

"OK found it." Jim started punching in the digits

"Remember 67 before the number"

"Please. Pam,I've been prank calling people for ever. i am the prank calling master." He put the phone up to his ear. The phone rang 2 times. "Come on Dwight,Get off Angela and answer the phone already" Pam made a disgusted face and cringed. The thought of it made her want to throw up her Captain Crunch.

"Hello?" Dwight's voice startled him.

" Hello. mister schrute? I am Phil Anderson. Would you like to buy a new top-of-the-line Kirby Vacuum cleaner. It comes with a free one month subscription to...Playboy. Yes, Playboy. What a Grand magazine, didn't you agree? So, What do you think? Only $12.99."

"yes, i would love too. If i buy 2 vacuums do i get 2 free subscriptions?" Dwight's voice sounded Eager. Jim was creeped out. Pam hurried over to the phone and pushed the speaker button so she could hear it as well.

"Just think; 4 vacuums equals 4 free months. the More vacuums the more months."

"Is there a limit to the amount of Kirby Vacuums you purchase?" Pam's jaw dropped. Dwight is such a sleaze. And an idiot. Playboy is cheaper than 4 crappy vacuums. Jim tried so hard not to laugh right into the phone.

"No sir-e there isn't. Why put a limit on such a valuable offer is what i say. So Mr. Schrute, How many vacuums are you in for?"

"12. i can give the other 11 as Christmas gifts."

"We are also taking a poll mister schrute. We want to know what kind of People Kirby product buyers are.Do you have a spouse? Or a significant other?"

"Yes, Are all the playboys the same issue?" Dwight wasn't able to get playboy off his mind.

"Significant other or spouse sir? Male or Female?"

"Female Significant other. When can i expect the magazine?" Jim had enough of Dwight's Dwightness.

"Oh Dear GOD! A BOMB" Jim hung up. Pam couldn't stop laughing. His playboy situation could evolve into a whole nothing thing. Jim already had ideas rushing through his head. He looked at the clock. 12:47pm. His stomach gurgled. Pam was hungry also.

"Lunch?"Jim suggested.

"oh yes please. I'm up for anything." She sat on the bar stool and watched Jim start taking out food to make a grilled cheese sandwich. He had made him one before. it was heavenly.