JUST CAN'T WAIT!

By MYRTLE THE TYRTLE

A/N: This was originally written as a drama production, but was never performed :(. So now presenting, the first British Monarchy/Lion King crossover on Fan faction dot net: JUST CAN'T WAIT! (nothing of which belongs to me, with the exception of Mortimer, the Iraqis, the Hippies and Bruce McGill and most of the plot).

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List of characters:

Prince Charles – son of the queen, the hero of the story. Future king of Britain. (Based on Simba)

Uncle Mortimer – expelled from the family many years ago (that's why he's not in the historical records). Leader of Iraqi militant group the Al Hyenas. Full of anger because he is unloved by his family, vows to make them pay. Mwa ha ha ha ha! Often speaks in soliloquy, as do other villains from other films. Usually reveals evil plans during these speeches to the audience. (Scar) Queen Elizabeth II – mother of Charles, sister of Mortimer. Queen of the British Empire. (Mufasa)

Prime Minister Tony Blair – governor of Britain and advisor to Charles. (Zazu)

Camilla – Charles' current girlfriend. Only companion, apart from Tony Blair. But 'politicians don't count'. (Nala)

The Iraqi Militants (Al Hyena) – Baz, Shaz and Ed. Baz and Shaz speak heavily accented English, while Ed just jabbers and giggles. Work for Uncle Mortimer. (Hyenas)

The Hippies – Timmy and Jumbo. Live in the forest and by the saying 'let's smoke marijuana'. The crazy stuff they do when they are under the influence of this (potentially) dangerous substance shows that DRUGS ARE BAD! Nonetheless, the duo are resourceful and helpful to those in need. (Timon and Pumbaa)

Bruce McGill – a mystical Australian immigrant whose goal in life is to provide an insightful glance at what could be… Possesses strange talent of always turning up at the right moment. Appears crazy, but has a signed certificate from a mental hospital to prove he is safe for society. (Rafiki)

Citizens of the British Empire – in the world of drama these 'citizens' are usually known as EXTRAS. They also play other varying roles, such as trees and Iraqis.

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Scene One

A small crowd of Citizens (CBE) are gathered around a small television set, the picture of which cannot be seen, but voices can be heard.

"In the circle… the circle of life…"

"And that was Joan Dawson singing the Circle of Life from the world famous movie and musical, the Lion King. Anyway, that's all for this week on Stars in their Eyes; we'll be back next week, same time, same place, same host: just different Joe Nobodies singing all the songs you know in an attempt to make it big in the music industry."

"Hey!" yells a voice from the crowd. It's got an Aussie accent, so it must be Bruce McGill. "I thought we were watching the presentation of the new Prince! Someone change the channel!"

The channel is changed.

"And what a shame we've run out of time," says a stuck-up Pommy voice. It's the Prime Minister, Tony Blair. "Otherwise, we could show you another three hours of pictures of our little cutey wootey princey wincey. Anyways, I am going to be with the little baby 24-7, in an attempt to befriend him. God knows I need friends. Even my political allies are against me these days… What do you mean, this camera's on. I know it's on! I'm trying to get some sympathy votes!"

The screen fizzled and faded out.

"Oh blast! We've missed it, and now the reception on the telly has gone. Darn. Oh well, anyone up for a game of rugger or a spot of tea?"

There were general shouts of enthusiasm, and the Random CBE who had just spoken led the crowd off stage. Bruce reluctantly followed, leaving the words of wisdom: "I predict great things for that baby."

"Of course you do. He's gonna be the king, innee? Come on Bruce, let's go look at your certificate." He was led of by a kind and caring woman with long blonde hair. That is technically irrelevant, as that was her only appearance in this story.

For theatre purposes, the stage was now empty. However, because this is a fanfic, we can have the setting changing at the drop of a hat or push of a spacebar.

Tony Blair walks on, carrying a baby doll.

"What a cute little baby! OK, so it's not the real thing, I know, but little Charlie is sleeping right now, and I don't want to wake him," he soliloquized.

He is interrupted by a loud scream.

"As I was saying: Charlie is sleeping now, and I don't want to wake him. Oh, that high-pitched scream: no that can't be my Charlie. He'd never scream. He's such a good…"

"Tony will you get that damned baby to shut up! I thought he was goint to be your friend! Useless politician! I oughta dissolve your parliament and…" the angry old woman (who was actually Charlie's mother) eventually faded out.

"Well, don't you go anywhere now," Tony said to the audience, the queen or the baby doll. It could be any of them, really. He left the stage, and our story continues some considerable years later…

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A/N: sorry for the shortness, but I just wanted to know if you guys like it before I post the next few chapters, which I have already written.

If you don't like it, I'll put them up to spite you.

Ha.

P.S. Please review.

Myrtle