Title: Dear Mr. Awesome
Author: Pixiella
Beta: Microsoft Works
Fandom: WWE/pro wrestling
Genre: Humor
Rating: T (for language!)
Main characters: Miz, Alex Riley
Other characters: random wrestlers, yay!
Summary: Miz gets a letter from two of his fans. Though the content of the "fan letter" is really not what he expected…
Disclaimer: I own nothing except the plot, all the characters belong to the WWE, Vince McMahon, themselves and/or whoever it is that owns them at some level. I don't, that's for sure. Also not making any profit out of making and publishing this, this is made just for pure fun.
A/N: Because we are bad girls with LoveToTheCucumber and forgot Mike's birthday - yet again. We have discussed about this bad thing before and this year, the consequences are a little bit worse than before… XD
And sorry for all the grammar and spelling mistakes, English is not my first language. Still, I hope you read and review the story and let me know what I should do with it. All kind of feedback is really highly appreciated.
"Fan post time!" Randy yelled as he walked through backstage with a huge plastic box in his hands. John followed after him with another box and Sheamus came after them, carrying the third box. Every single one of this ugly dark green colored boxes was full of cards, letters and packages featuring pictures, drawings, letters, posters to be signed and whatnot.
As superstars and divas started to flow out from the locker rooms one at the time, Randy, John and Sheamus all had their hands full when they tried to find something for everyone - mainly in the WWE Universe, there was fans for the top superstars like the three of themselves, but usually everyone got at least one letter for them. Too bad people like Wade Barrett and Christian got mainly hate letters, but that didn't bother than as much as you would think. They enjoyed to be hated and fans to know who they should hate. Life would be boring without people to hate, eh?
Mike "The Miz" Mizanin stood by the locker room door with Alex Riley, watching the three of the WWE's top superstars giving out letters and postcards like they did on every day basis. There Natalya got her own set of letters and pictures to sign, CM Punk had a box entirely on his own brought to the door of his locker room and even Kane her a handful of letters with a teddy bear on the top of the pile.
"Let's go," Miz muttered to Alex, his fateful sidekick just nodding his head as they turned to leave, only to be stopped by John yelling after them, "Stop it right there, "Mr. Awesome"!" Slowly Miz turned around, sending a glare towards the WWE Champion, who made his way through the other superstars to them, handing Miz just a single white envelope which had his famous nickname, "Mr. Awesome" written on the top.
"Have a nice day," John smirked, saluting Miz quickly before returning back to his duties. Miz examined the envelope in his hand carefully - only his name on the top, nothing else on the plain white envelope. He could feel something inside of it, probably just yet another hate letter for him.
"Open it already," Alex nearly jumped up and down in excitement next to him - it had been such a long time since either of them had gotten any fan mail and he was definitely going to take everything out of this one. Miz, still looking the envelope in his hand, carefully reaching toward the door handle with his free hand, opening the locker room door. Quickly his eyes sent themselves free from the hypnosis caused by the enveloped, checked the space around them - and when he was sure there was nobody around to see them, as everyone was too concentrated on their own mail, the two quickly sneaked inside the locker room, locking the door after them.
"Openitopenitopenit," Alex hurried his mentor in excitement, Miz pushing the young man away from him, getting some space to himself and the letter - it had been some time since he had received any fan mail, so he was going to fully enjoy this one. Even if it was just another hate letter, it was only going to boost up his heel ego, so it was just all good.
Carefully Miz ripped the top of the envelope open, both him and Alex taking a quick peek inside of it. Only a plain white, neatly folded paper inside of it. Reaching down towards it, Miz picked it into his hand, throwing the envelope to Alex.
"Read it already," Alex hurried him, Miz sending a silencing death glare to him. Alex pouted, though still followed Miz as the brunette made his way to the couch, dropping on it and finally folded the letter open. "What does it say?" Alex asked before Miz even had the change to read the opening sentence himself. "Read it out loud, I wanna know too!"
"Fine then," Miz sighed annoyed, clearing his throat a bit before beginning, "'Dear Mr. Awesome'." Miz grinned widely, these fans he did like - usually the letter started with the exact opposite words unlike this one, so this had to be something good.
"'You are so hot and cute…'" Miz continued, his self-esteem just growing with each word that he red out loud. "'…And we are so sorry that we forgot your birthday!' What the hell?"
"Who could anyone forget about YOUR birthday?" Alex asked, shocked by this sudden change of events, watching the hatred grow on Miz's face as he continued to read the letter in his hands, "'We have done many horrible things to you, we just want to know what we should do to make it up to you again!' Who the hell are these people?"
Turning rapidly the paper around and look on it's backside, Miz didn't find any clues to his own question. Furiously he pushed the paper to Alex, getting up on his feet and started to stop around the locker room, angrily muttering to himself where the hell a letter like this had came from. "Maybe the boys are playing pranks on me…"
"Hey, it continues," Alex pointed out as he checked the letter in his hands, continuing to read the text out loud, "'There horrible things include such as dressing you as a woman and calling you Mizzy (and making you like it), we got your ear pierced, we have paired you up with your worst nemesis John Morrison AND we had you have sex with someone underage which got you throw into jail. Also you were drugged and raped by Maryse.'"
Alex couldn't continue as he burst up in a laughter, falling from the arm of the couch he had been sitting on the entire time. Miz on the other hand was now even more furiously stomping around the room, walking up to Alex and taking the letter from him, ripping it apart. Throwing the pieces into the air, he growled loudly to the younger man, still laughing to the content of the letter he just red.
"There is nothing funny about this!" Miz yelled, trying to fit back the urge of slapping Alex across the face as the young man didn't do anything to even try to calm down. "This is serious business, Riley! Do you understand what the fuck does this mean?"
"I… I dunno know," Alex stated from between his laughter, Miz only groaning and rolling his eye to him. As he stomped to the door and forced it open, he yelled as loudly as he could, "Who the hell was the idiot to write that "fan letter" for me?"
Soon, John's head popped from a locker room door. "Yeah, I dunno, but it was in the box that came from Europe," he stated with a shrug, the smirked quickly. "Apparently you have fans all over the world now. Congrats."
As John's head disappeared and the door was closed again, Miz sighed, turning towards Alex who had calmed down a little bit. "Come on," he stated, motioning to his rookie with his hand, "We need to get something done to this madness."
"And what is that something?" Alex asked, getting up from his seat and following Miz out from the room and down the hallway, neither of them really knowing where they were going. "We are gonna hunt them down or something?"
"That is only the plan B," Miz stated, wiping his hands over his face, still in a bit of frustration. "First we get me a bodyguard. You are not working to keep these creeps away from me."
"And then the plan B?" Alex suggested, getting a glare over the shoulder of the Miz back. "Nope. Then we get something to eat, watch a sad movie and I end up feeling good in the end when you cry your eyes out and can't sleep without me singing you a lullaby. Deal?"
"Deal!" Alex stated, being all excited about this kind turn of events, Miz only face palming with a deep sigh.
A/N: I have no excuse for this! ...All I can say is that I blame LoveToTheCucumber for this. XD She told me once it wouldn't be very awesome to forget Mike's birthday and this year we both did it.. So oops! XD And then we thought about sending him a letter of apology, including all the things that we did for him including that we forgot about his birthday, and asking what we could do for him in order to make everything up for him. And so, this really weird one shot was born!
All the things mentioned in the letter, by the way - we did in our stories for him. Every single one of them. Some of the things were in the original 'My Christmas Miracle' by LoveToTheCucumber, so they can't be found anymore, but I think most of the things you can find in our stories that feature Mikey.. But, all in all, we have done some really awful stuff to him in past, huh? XD
Maybe I should continue this..? I dunno. Right now it's staying as a one shot, but maybe some day there will be more to this. Also, I'm still not really familiar with writing humor, so if it's not funny, then be it. I just needed to get this out of my system cause it was such an awesome idea. X3
