I can't believe I'm seeing him again today. Its not like I haven't thought about him these past 5 years because I have. I think about him so much it kills me. Im not sure how he will react to seeing me, I honestly don't know how I will react to seeing him. As I finish putting on my jewelry I look in the mirror down at my beautiful daughter who is fixing her hair making it look just right for her big day. Every time I look at her she reminds me so much of her daddy, she smiles and his dimples show on her cheeks, I look into her eyes and staring back at me are a pair of beautiful brown eyes that made me see my future and everything in between.
"Momma? Do you think my daddy will like me?"
"Oh hunny your daddy will love you so much he wont know what to do with himself" I reply as I kneel down to pick her up. I sit on the end of my bed and sit her down into my lap to slip her little sneakers on her feet.
"Are you ready to go baby girl?" "Yep, momma. I just have to get one thing!"
I don't really think anything of Anabell wanting to bring some of her toys in the car since it was a pretty regular occurrence.
While I wait for her to come from out of her bedroom I think back over the last time I saw Logan.
-Flashback-
Logan and I were sitting on his couch waiting for his dad to come in from BBQing in the backyard, I knew it would be a while before I saw him again since he was leaving Texas the next day but I was determined to not be sad. I was so proud of him, my heart swelled just thinking of the amazing things he was going to accomplish! He finally got picked up to be on a new TV show on Nick and he was excited to finally be living his dream. At 18 he was moving across the country to live the high life! I was staying behind because I still had my senior year of high school left. He looked over at me and wrapped his arms around my waist effectively pulling me onto his lap. "Em, I'm going to miss you so much. I don't know if I can do this without you?"
"Logan. You are going to be fine. You will get moved to California and start working and by the time I see you in person again time will have flown by!"
"Are you sure you will come visit me once I get settled?" he asked. "Of course I am! The first break I get from school I'm coming to spend it with you. You might even have trouble getting me to leave after."
"I'm sure I wont want you to leave once I've had you to myself in the California sun! most likely ill tie you to my bed and never let you out!"
I just giggled back at him and laid my head on his shoulder content just being in his arms.
- End of Flashback -
"Okay mommy I'm weady." Anabell came up to me with her arms outstretched and her backpack on her back.
"Okay, Belly lets go!" I said smiling at her and picking her up "You are getting so big. Ughh I don't think I can carry you anymore Belly!" I joked with her poking her tiny tummy and squishing her to me.
"No mommy I'm a big little giwl!" she squeeled and giggled. Oh how I love my little baby girl.
I load her into the car and buckle her into her car seat setting her backpack in the seat next to her. Then I get in the car and take a deep breath.
A little over two hours and a lot of unexpected traffic later we get to the venue. I park in VIP parking since I figured if I'm going all out for this I might as well make it easier on myself if I need to make a quick getaway.
When I decided that it was high time to see Logan again I realized I had no way of getting in touch with him, no phone number, no address, no nothing. Telling him online may have crossed my mind but I figured that either he wouldn't believe me, or he just flat out wouldn't get my messages. I tried going to his parents house since they still own it but no one was home and honestly I didn't feel right telling them without Logan knowing first. So I went with the only obvious option: Showing up to his concert and springing it on him. Logan always did say: "go big or go home" so I figured I'd lay it all out there and hope for the best. I hear an excited giggle coming from the backseat of my small SUV and look behind me. "Momma lets go! Lets go! Lets go! We are here! " "I know BellyBaby. I'm coming." I walk around the car and help Anabell out of her seat, as she reaches and grabs her backpack. I walk up to the gate with Anabell in my arms and I can tell I'm holding her tightly, I just can't help it I'm starting to get really nervous.
