-1Give Guidance or Counsel
Door Handles
Roy/Ed Fan Fiction
Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Romance, Comedy, Drama, AU Highschool
Pairings: Royed, Alwin, Scarlust, Wrathclaus
Rating: T (I guess? For language?)
Rating of Chapter: T
Plot: AU; Ed's never fancied anyone in his entire 15 years of life, not one girl, nor one guy. Al came to the conclusion that Ed was 'Asexual', Winry just thought he was weird. Thus; she sends him to counselling. Of course, it would help if his guidance counsellor would actually give guidance, or counsel.
Chapter 1 - I'm Your Counsellor
Go to the Chapter Bar and just read the chapter titles; it's the whole story in 75 words.
Tuesday the 28th of September
Edward Elric didn't like people. Well, he liked them fair enough, but he was had never, in his 15 (almost 16) years of life, ever, liked anyone enough to actually call himself in love with them. To prove this, Al decided to introduce him to a bunch of girls that he thought was cute:
1. Winry Rockbell was cute, independent, well spoken, smart, and funny. She had long blonde hair and really pretty eyes, a stunning figure and was always looking out for people. Ed liked her good enough as a friend, but could never see her as anything more. It didn't help that she was going out with his younger brother.
2. Rose had tan skin, dark hair, with a died fringe, was incredibly popular, and even though she was a year older then Ed, she always stopped to talk when they passed each other in the corridors. Ed thought she was bloody gorgeous, but he'd still turn her down if she asked him to go out with her.
3. Claus was a really cute girl with a determined attitude and a good mind and heart. Not to mention that she was incredibly brave. Her manners may be a little lacking, but she was generally polite and sweet if you really got to know her. Ed would most likely give his life for the girl, but there was no way she was girlfriend material.
And last but not least;
4. Phsyren was the schools feisty nurse, she was very pretty and had a flirtatious attitude. She was constantly giving Ed jabs, and he hated her for it. End of.
And so, it wad deduced that Ed had no interest what-so-ever in girls, however, Ed refused to believe there was even a possibility that he may be gay, thus, Winry decided to introduce him to a bunch of guys she thought were cute;
1. Russell was a tall, blonde third year who had a reputation for being the school heartthrob, despite his tender age of 14. He had an arrogant attitude, and although he was a year younger then Ed, was already a fair amount taller then him. Ed hated him for it, and Al restrained from pointing out that most people were taller then him, whatever their age.
2. Envy was a fifth year guy, who looked like a cross between a girl and a palm tree. With long, died green, spiked hair, and a gothic fashion sense, he was always in a lot of trouble. He barely even showed up for school, yet still got top grades. In any case, Ed didn't really know him that well, and instantly dismissed the idea that he might 'like' him.
3. Greed was Envy's older brother, who was 21 and no longer attended their Highschool. However, he always came to pick up Envy and their other brother - who's name escapes Ed - in a flashy sports car. Ed could see how he was thought of as attractive, but certainly didn't fall in love at first sight. Or any sighting after that.
4. And last on the Boys Team, was (coincidentally) the PE teacher, Mr Havoc. Despite always having a cigarette in his hand, the guy was actually incredibly fit. (and by that Ed meant physically). Ed really couldn't see himself loving the chain smoker.
And thus; it was deduced that Ed did not like boys either, and Al dubbed his older brother by one year 'Asexual'. Ed was happy with this conclusion because he didn't need stupid hormones and what-not getting in the way of more important things anyway. Of course, Winry just thought he was weird, but it wasn't like he could have done something about that even if he tried. And thus; begins our story. (YES, I do have an obsession with the word 'thus')
-
"Oh SHIT!" came the surprised shout from behind, and Riza Hawkeye turned around just in time to catch the falling blonde. Unfortunately this meant dropping the many heavy folders she was carrying, some of which dropped on her toes and caused her a fair amount of bodily pain, but she wouldn't let that show. In her years of working at the school, she'd gotten pretty used to hyper blondes such as the one she'd just caught, and if she showed any form of weakness she'd be preyed upon, she was sure. She'd also gotten pretty used to the fowl language hyper blondes could use, and wasn't really in the mood for scolding him at that moment. She'd learnt to be attentive around this blonde, he was always in trouble. Yep, Riza Hawkeye had learnt a lot. She steadied the boy and he gave an apologetic smile and nod.
"Sorry Ma'am. I tripped." he said, ruffling his long hair nervously. Riza sighed.
"Yes, I can see that Ed." she replied, she didn't care about his clumsiness, but her feet hurt. She'd scold him for his bad mouth, but couldn't bring herself to. It was the language of the students nowadays, besides, Ed was one of her favourite pupils - bullshit about teachers not picking favourites. She gave him a short smile, but quenched it when his two good friends skidded to a halt beside him. "What have I said about running in the halls?" she asked, a hint of resignation in her voice. No matter how many times she voiced her concerns about high speeds in crowded places, children would never learn.
"Sorry Ma'am." replied the youngest, who's blonde hair was the darkest of the four people in the corridor. "But we've got something to tell brother, and it's super important!" Alphonse Elric explained excitedly, but Winry, his older by one year girlfriend, shoved him out of the way.
"No. I'VE got something to tell Ed." she disagreed. "It was my idea."
"Yeah, but I filled out all the paperwork."
"But I -"
"ORDER!"
The three blonde students grimaced, and stood to attention, fearing the wrath of the Maths teacher. Two student teachers, who were walking by at the time, snickered appreciatively at Riza's firm hand in the situation. The teens blushed at the laughter, annoyed at being caught by people not much older then themselves, being (Effectively) told off. Riza gave the student teachers and reproachful look and waved them away, which made the teens feel better. Ed swept down, picked up the folders Riza had earlier dropped, and handed it to her. She nodded thankfully, and turned, walking away - looking back once or twice to make sure the teens weren't already in more trouble. Once she was out of sight, Winry and Al rounded on the unsuspecting Edward Elric. The bewildered boy sighed and tried to sort through the jumbled mess that was his best friends trying to tell him something 'good' at the same time.
What he deciphered was: "because you know you're a fr - asexual - eak, and so we signed you up for freak - counselling - guidance. You'll get to meet lots of other freaks." Winry said the sweetest things. At least Al was trying to be nice and… wait, what?
"You signed me up for counselling? Are you fucking nuts!?" he screamed. Phsyren, the feisty nurse mentioned earlier, chose that very moment to walk by.
"Language big man."
"Don't mock me!" Ed retaliated, instantly thinking she was making a joke about his height, what little of it he had. She was the only person other then Al who knew about his fear of jabs, and she'd been talking about growing up ever since she found out about it. Ed was grown up! (and to prove this he had a spaz attack at Phsyren, then pouted when she just smirked), besides, grown ups got frightened too right? He was fairly certain that Mr. Breda was frightened to dogs - which was far more irrational then a fear of someone STABBING you with a NEEDLE. It fucking hurt bitch! Phsyren just winked suggestively, and Ed glared right back, he wasn't even sure her random advances were legal. But anyway, back to the matter at hand. Winry and Al were the next to see his death glare.
"What upon the bloody Earth made you think I need counselling?" he asked venomously. Winry answered.
"You're 15 year old and have never once been interested in the girl. It's unnatural! I would mind if you liked guys or something! But you don't like them either!"
Not really seeing why that needed counselling, Ed voiced his opinion. That time, Al and Winry shared a worried glance. Ed narrowed his eyes suspiciously.
"Well…" began Winry, but Al put a hand on his girlfriends shoulder, effectively shutting her up. She gave Ed a pitying look, then shifted her gaze to the ground. Al smiled at him sweetly, the way only a brother can.
"Brother, don't you think that mum… she died at a very important time of your life." Al trailed off, but Ed was sending him a look that said 'so?'. It was common knowledge that Ed didn't like to talk about either of his parents. "Brother…"
"We think Trisha's death made you unstable, and now you can't feel love for anybody. You need counselling." ended Winry bluntly. Ed stared at her, dumbfounded. He wasn't that screwed up… was he? That wasn't true! It couldn't be, he loved Al.
"Al doesn't count, he's your brother." Winry answered his unasked question. Somehow reading his mind, (and putting him a little on edge). Ed pouted slightly, he didn't care what she said, he refused to go to a counselling session with a bunch of pumped up kids immersed in their own self pity. Winry, however, did her amazing mind reading trick again - (okay, now he's really on edge) -.
"You can't not go. The paper work's all filled out. If you don't go, you'll get a detention."
"What the fuck!? That's not fair!"
"All's fair in love and counselling."
"YOU JUST MADE THAT UP!" Ed pointed dramatically at her, and passers by gave him a weird stare, and started whispering behind their hands. Ed stuck his tongue out at them when he was sure they weren't looking. He shook his head. Winry and Al - they were so dead.
"Look." Said Al, looking up at his brother through his eyelashes, - he was actually taller then Ed, but this way it made Ed feel tall. Ed twitched, and gave a small smile. He could never stay mad at Al. "I'm sorry brother, but at least go to one meeting. For me?" asked the younger Elric, well versed in the poem of manipulation. He pushed the counselling slip into his brothers hands. Ed, mesmerised by his brothers puppy dog eyes, felt his hands closed around the slip, and he nodded before he could stop himself. The two other blondes cheered happily and sped off down the hallway before Ed could change his mind - again, completely ignoring Riza's no running in the halls rule -. Ed stared blankly down at the slip.
Counselling Session
Mr. E. Elric
Room: G4
There was no name as to who was taking the session, and no indication as to whether it was a one to one, or a group. Ed hoped it was one to one. If he was forced to go along to this, he didn't want a bunch of suicidal kids knowing about his problems. Not that he had any problems. Why couldn't he live his Asexual life alone and happy -without everyone knowing about it? Tomorrow - he could definitely wait until tomorrow. He didn't want to go to this thing. The bell went, signalling he was late for his next class.
"Oh SHIT!"
Wednesday the 29th of September
The next day did come soon enough, it came way too soon for Ed's liking. He hated public speaking. He hated speaking in general, especially about his feelings and shit. He spent every class in a daze, dreading the final bell, when he would have to saunter off to G4 and spend a hole hour discussing just that. At lunch he was so uptight he couldn't even find the will to speak to Winry and Al. in the last period, his heart was pounding so hard he thought it was going to break his ribcage (and that would be a nasty mess!). He seriously hated talking to new people, he hated talking about his love life, he hated talking about his parents: one deceased, one as good as dead. Then the bell rang and he found himself outside the door to G4, his hand hovering over the handle, as if frozen to the spot.
"Are you going to go in, or are you just admiring the craftsmanship of the door handle?"
Ed looked up into handsome onyx eyes, and took note of the arrogant smirk which went so well with the man's sexy looks. Ed inwardly choked… the man was 'sexy'? HE had thought the man was SEXY. He stared, dumbfounded, at the taller man, until the smirk fell.
"Look kid, I don't have all day. Now, if you'd kindly get out of the way miss…"
Ed blushed heavily, gripping the door handle tightly.
"I'm not a girl you idiot! My name is Edward Elric, and I'm here for counselling!" he shouted, glaring, and realising too late that he'd basically just screamed he was a nutcase. The man's smirk returned full force.
"Well then Edward Elric. My name is Roy Mustang, and I'm your counsellor."
