Find The Words
Chapter 1: Every Girl Has A Story
-x-
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto! Or, the quote below.
#Note: This was previously titled 'Letting It In, Letting Me In'.
(T) - Tenten's POV
(S) - Sasuke's POV
Dedication: This is for mistress-sire03 and the few others who have specifically read & reviewed to all of my SasuTen pieces :)
"If the words are in your heart, they should come out of your mouth."
(xangadotcom/OUTSPOKENquotes)
(S)
There are a lot of people who try to get to know me better. Especially by trying to start a conversation as if they already know me. One thing I get a lot -"Jeez, Sasuke. You're always so quiet; you look like you're planning to blow up the school or something." If I had really looked like that, I don't think they'd be coming up to me. However, someone I would suspect, as potential mass murderer, is Naruto Uzumaki. He happens to be screaming my name right now.
"Yo! Sasuke! Sasuke? SASUKE!" His voice is loud enough to shatter eardrums – someone could bleed to death from that, couldn't they? I decided to do mankind a favor and shut the idiot up.
"I hear you, dobe." He was half way down the hallway, and all I had to do was mumble it to get him to quiet down. He broke out into a grin, and galloped over.
"You know what today is, right?" Ramen day? I don't know, he sounded so excited.
"No," I said bluntly.
"The new student comes!" he said, delighted.
I raised an eyebrow at him.
"Do you know what that means?" he pressed, hitting my shoulder with his fist.
"No?" I regret to inform you that I decided against hitting him back, harder.
"That you won't be the new kid anymore, and I can officially call you best friend without getting humiliated," he exclaimed. Uh. I guess I didn't mention that.
I scowled at him – "You humiliated?"
I don't think I had to say much more. I walked around with the male blonde bombshell. Well, maybe that was overdoing it.
"Yeah. I look like a loser hanging with you. But now, everyone will forget about that," he smiled, some fox-grin he gets when he's happy. I let his statement slide – I'm not oblivious to the girls who hang around us, just cause of me.
"Who is he?" I asked.
Our school, Konoha High, is somewhat on the small side. I moved here (four hundred miles north of where I used to live) after sophomore year, and had been the only new student up until now. We were a month into our senior year, already – and yeah, I was still the "new kid" – it was a small town.
"No, it's a she." I noted the lack of extra enthusiasm, and wondered if he had another girl in mind. Otherwise he would already be chasing after this new one.
"Name?"
"Don't know. But Sakura saw her, said she's got a few classes with us," he replied. He was talking about Honors and AP.
"Hn." We reached first period (Pre Calc, Kakashi Hatake) with a minute to spare before the bell. As always, I took a seat in the back, on the left side of the room. Shikamaru was in front of me, Sakura behind, and Naruto to the right. The dobe was already talking to Hinata as he sat down, and I heard a whisper from behind me.
"Naruto tell you about the new girl?" It was Sakura's voice – calm, warm, collected. She'd been one of the few girls who had given up on me, but peacefully resorted to friendship. I respected that.
"Yeah," I said, not bothering to turn and face her. Mr. Hatake walked in then, holding onto a small orange book, apologizing for being late, etc. New kid or not, that would never change.
"Okay, okay. So, Principle Tsunade will be coming in any minute with the new student. I'd appreciate it if you all be quiet, and make it look like you're actually as intellectual as she thinks you are." His arrival timing might always be off, but the principle's wasn't. I heard the classroom door open, and Hatake greeted her. I was looking down, scribbling the homework assignment that was written on the board.
"Good morning, children. I'd like to introduce you to your new student, Tenten Tanaka."
The lead from my mechanical pencil snapped.
-?-
(T)
AwkwardAwkwardAwkwardAwkward. I don't know why a teacher, or a freaking principle, has to insist on introducing me to the class. They all responded with a smile or a wave or something, not that I was really looking at them. Hopefully I only had to go through this once?
"Tenten, would you care to say something?" The silver-haired man, Mr. Hatake I think, asked me. Principle Tsunade smiled, and left the room. I stared at the teacher.
"Sure," I agreed, and then faced the room. There was a girl with exotic blue eyes, and platinum blonde hair that grabbed my attention. She had a curious and calculating look on her face. I smiled disastrously at her.
"I'm Tenten, and I like boys." Maybe I was in a bitchy mood. And maybe I felt like being a bitch. So maybe that's what I was being one. The girl's eyes enlarged, and when she realized I had directed it at her, she hissed and turned away. Right, good job Tenten. Enemy number one already all picked out.
The class was laughing, which hadn't been my intention. I didn't really have one, actually. The slut was eyeing me up like I was competition – I was going to give her it. Mr. Hatake chuckled, and then patted my shoulder, and used his other hand to direct me to a seat in the second row, to the right.
"You can sit there, Tenten."
I mumbled thanks, readjusted my canvas bag, and went to the seat. I was feeling a little optimistic, surprisingly.
-?-
(S)
She looked different. Her hair was down to her mid-back, pulled up halfway with a clip. She had lost her crafted Boyfriend jeans, in favor of fading skinny jeans. The naval showing pink tee was gone too, replaced by a gray/white striped V-tee. Her brown eyes and tanned skin was the only thing that looked familiar – last time I had seen her she was a finally-not-awkward fifteen year old. Now she was seventeen, with the mature face and body to show for it.
I grabbed a pen from my binder, as well as the textbook. I opened it up, and started doing the homework for that night, distracting myself. Mr. Hatake was reading off names, doing attendance. R, S, T, U…
"Tanaka, Tenten." I couldn't help but shift my eyes over to her – she looked up at him, smiled barely, and nodded. Then went back to doodling.
"Uchiha, Sasuke." I still had my eyes on her, and I caught the reaction she offered. The twitch of a muscle in her cheek, the same one she got whenever she was caught off guard. The stiffen of her back, that made her a half-inch taller. Her stalled arm, hand with pencil, hovering over the paper not sure what to do. Her face went blank.
"Here," I said, the same way I had every day this year.
I went back to working on the math problems, but still saw when she finally looked over to me. I couldn't help it, I never could – I glanced up, and caught her eye. It was those eyes, honey brown and glowing, that always told her story. And right now they showed her distress, panic, and the possibility that she was about to cry. I turned away again. I didn't want her to see the same thing.
Even with Hatake's witty remarks and dry humor, the class period went by slow. I finished tonight's homework by the time the bell rang, but waited in my seat while Naruto prattled onto
the teacher after class. Sakura got up from behind me, and placed a piece of lead on my desk. After a second, I realized it was the piece that I accidentally snapped off.
"You know her," she said softly. I stared at the lead for a moment, but finally looked up to her.
"I always thought I did," I said briskly. And honestly. Then I got out of my seat, grabbed my books, and dragged Naruto out of the room to our lockers.
-?-
(S)
"She was hot, wasn't she?" Naruto said to Kiba, as we walked towards our outside lunch table.
"Yeah – did you see those jeans? They were fucking tight," he commented.
"I've only seen Temari and Sakura wear jeans like that," Naruto added.
"And look at them? They're babes."
I was listening, but not joining, their conversation. I took a seat across from Hinata, who was sitting next to a thoughtful looking Sakura. Naruto sat at my right, Kiba to his right. A second later, Ino took a place at my left. Damn Sakura for being friends with her. Maybe she'd realize my mood was foul.
"Hey Sasuke!" Or, not.
"Hn." I took my chocolate milk, and opened it.
"Do you want a straw? I really wouldn't want to put my lips against that," she fussed, staring at the little carton with a mild disgust.
"No," I answered. Has it ever occurred to her that I'm not going to be attracted to someone who acts like my mother would? If she was alive, and whatnot.
"Oh. Okay." She was starting to get the hint – not that on an average day I paid any more attention to her then this.
"So what about that new girl, huh? She seems like a bitch," Ino started again. I recalled the nasty smile Tenten had given her earlier, and raised an eyebrow, whilst chugging the milk. Without a straw.
"She s-seems o-okay," Hinata denied.
"I don't know. 'I like boys'? Can you get more of a slut then that?" she disagreed.
"Ino-pig, put yourself in her situation. I guarantee you would have said something of the same likes." It was Sakura, defending Tenten – I could guess why. Defending her, in an effort to defend me. I didn't need it.
"I agree with Ino," I said curtly. Sakura stared at me, while Ino smiled with pure glee. Naruto choked on his noodles.
"Thank you, Sasuke. I mean – Sasuke, where are you going?" Ino stopped, and I felt her eyes (along with everyone else's) on my back. I didn't answer, but walked past the trash can, dumped my lunch into it, and kept on going.
When I reached the shaded area between two buildings, I noticed Sakura was behind me. I turned around.
She looked concerned, naturally worried. It occurred to me for the first time that maybe she hadn't "given up". Maybe she had only pretended to be over me. I was scowling at her, but she didn't flinch.
"So, who is she?" she asked.
I hated her voice then, for the first time. Last year, winter break of junior year, I had even admitted to her that it was what I liked about her. But I also told her that I wouldn't date her. I hadn't dated anyone for two years. And now, she was annoying me.
"Just a girl," I said, brushing it off. I was kidding myself though. Sakura was the stubbornest person I knew.
"Every girl has a story," she pressed, making her voice solid.
"Not a worthy one," I bit back.
"Bullshit," she said – calmly, which was irritating. "You guys were involved, weren't you?"
Well, looks like it does take a genius to figure this one out.
"No," I said smoothly.
"Was it before you came here?" she persisted.
"I said no, Sakura." I think I made my point clear this time.
"Was it love...?" That soft voice won't ever stop catching my attention, even if feelings aren't attached.
I guess I paused this time – she looked as though she was fighting back tears.
"Can you even define love?"
She looked down, and a tear slipped down to stain her cheek. Yeah – those words had stung me before, too. She finally looked back up at me, and shook her head slowly. I nodded barely enough for her to see, and watched as she turned around to walk away.
I sat down, leaning against the wall, and put my head in my hands. I'd be a liar if I didn't say that a tear or two surfaced.
-?-
(T)
If getting lost hadn't been bad enough, overhearing Sasuke and his could-be-girlfriend's conversation was so much worse. I felt like my stomach had dropped ten feet, and I considered the bush next to me a place that I could vomit in if I had to. For now, I was pressed up against the wall, with Sasuke just around the corner.
Sasuke. I should have known that he'd be here. I should have considered the possibility. My dad and his brother worked together, when mine got transferred I could have asked if it'd be the same place that Itachi did. But I didn't. I hadn't wanted to think about it.
Breathing erratically, I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and texted my mom. "Pick me up, please." A moment later, she replied "I can't right now sweetie, are you okay?"
No, I'm not. Because Sasuke is here, looking like a Greek god, with girls obviously falling all over him. The one guy I thought I'd never see again, the one guy I told myself that I'd just have to forget. The guy who's heart I broke, without so much as a reason why. The guy who I fell in love with, and never fell out. So, no I'm not. No, I don't know if I'll ever be.
"yeah. I'm okay."
I shoved my phone back into my pocket, and turned around. I was still lost, but then again, I had been lost ever since the day I had forced myself to walk away.
Please Review :)
