The usual disclaimers. This story was begun on a whim and a half-thought-out idea, but I suppose that's part of what makes it awesome. After all, a few scribbles on a bar napkin at 2 A.M. can become modern quantum physics. This takes very little time to write, and I (for some reason) really enjoy writing Rei, so expect new stuff to come up quickly. I intended this to be a one-shot, but apparently the idea's too good to die. Enjoy.
"Shinji, be a dear and get the door, would you? I'm kind of in the middle of something," Misato pleaded, half-jokingly, from the safety of her exceedingly messy room.
Extracting himself from the couch with a mild grunt, the introverted Third Child set down his treasured SDAT and stepped carefully toward the door, avoiding several beer cans that weren't there a few minutes ago. Must have had the volume up too loud, I didn't even hear the bell, he mused, nearly tripping over yet another empty beer, My God, how does she even find time to drink it all?
Bringing his hand to the electronic pad beside the door and sighing something about carpet stains, Shinji opened the apartment's only door, which slid aside noiselessly. He turned his head quickly to see who had rung the bell, barely containing his surprise as his eyes widened.
"Ikari."
An unkempt mop of blue hair greeted the boy, who stuttered his own acknowledgment, "A-Ayanami, Uh..." he stepped back, "C- Come in."
Cursing himself for his speech impediments, Shinji closed the door as the near-silent First Child slid past him, whirling around to face him when she reached the kitchen. If she noticed the aluminum cans littering the tiled floor, she didn't show it. Then again, she rarely showed anything.
"Who is it?" Misato called from the other end of the apartment.
Before the brown-haired boy could answer, his fellow pilot took the initiative.
"It is..." she paused for a brief moment, as if she was unused to introducing herself, "Pilot Ayanami, Ma'am." an unnoticeable grimace graced her porcelain face, showing her dissatisfaction with the words she had spoken. They seemed rather awkward, but that may have been because she always talked in a whisper, and yelling on any occasion was difficult.
As it was the purple-haired guardian heard her perfectly well. "Oh, Rei, it's you!" she shouted back, surprised. "I hope you're here for Shinji," there was a horrible crashing noise, after which she muttered, "I'm buried in junk back here..."
Rei looked unconcerned. Her posture shifted minutely as she focused all her attention on the boy standing in front of her. She noticed that he was wearing his school uniform, as was she, though it was a Saturday. She dismissed this fact as immaterial.
Shinji rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably, trying to avoid eye contact. He never knew what to say or do around most people, and this feeling was incredibly intense when he was around the blue-haired girl, especially when he was alone with her.
Realizing that the Commander's son was unlikely to attempt to begin a conversation, and that what she had to say was probably best gotten out in the open as soon as possible, Rei spoke first. "Ikari. I have something to ask you."
The boy looked up, locking his eyes with the girl's. "Um, what is it?" he inquired, wishing she'd just get it over with. His face flushed involuntarily.
"It is a proposition," Rei said, talking slowly and more quietly than usual. "Considering our respective situations,"
Shinji groaned inwardly. Most likely it was something about schoolwork or shift rotations or something. If it had anything to do with Doctor Akagi or more synch tests he was going to lose it.
"There is a high likelihood that one of us will perish in battle," Rei continued, her strange red eyes catching some of the afternoon light, "Therefore, it is in our best interest to prepare for an abrupt end to our lives." Her brow quivered noticeably. If she were a different person, she might have been losing her cool.
The brown-haired boy nodded, wondering if she was going to finish this century.
"Shinji Ikari," the girl said, obviously unaccustomed to using his first name, "Will you marry me?"
Shinji literally choked.
Rei stood stock still, watching with apparent interest. "Is there something the matter?"
"I- No- What? Can you," Shinji jabbered, trying to say a thousand things at once, "Repeat- What you just said?" He coughed into his fist, praying that he did not just hear what he thought he did.
"Will you marry me?"
The words almost made him laugh and cry at the same time. To hear them from anyone, least of all Ayanami, was about as likely as a kitten crushing Unit 01. And yet, here he was, not dreaming or anything, and here she was, real as can be, asking him to go all the ceremonial way. It was more than mildly unnerving.
For a moment, the only sound was the piercing hack of respiratory distress. What on God's green Earth was Ayanami doing in Misato Katsuragi's apartment, proposing to him, the least appealing human being on said green Earth?
"Sorry, I," Shinji coughed again, violently clearing his throat. "I- Are you serious?" The words spun out before he could stop them, prompting Rei to remark that she was, and to inquire as to whether he required a tissue.
Silence reigned for a minute as a million things ran through the boy's head. Most were decidedly unpleasant, though some were happy, and at least one was downright perverse. A chain of extremely loud noises and a few curses bursting from Misato's room shook him out of the reverie.
"Why?" was the only question the now-shaking Child could muster.
Rei remained unmoving, and unflinchingly calm. "I apologize if I have upset you. I merely wished to experience the state of matrimony," she phrased the word with some difficulty, "Before I expire."
Shinji's mind was awhirl with questions, comments, and ridiculous pleas for a better explanation. His most prominent thought was, Do you have to be so scientific about it? but he was too freaked out to say that, so instead he blurted out, "What do you mean?" in one strung-together, rapid breath.
"It is probable that one or both of us will fall to the Angels before we have the chance to develop an adequate relationship," Rei said calmly, with the utmost patience. She added as an unspoken afterthought that he better not ask how she defined adequate, as that would take too long to explain. She hadn't really expected him to complain in the first place, given his love-starved life, but he was being troublesome against her wishes. It wasn't like she could just tell him to shut up and do her. Or could she?
Shinji's blabbering shattered those illusions. "This has got to be a joke," he muttered, as his mood quickly spiraled downward. "Did father order you to do this? Is Section 2 watching us?"
"Yes, but not for the express purpose of observing this conversation," the red-eyed girl managed, "This is not a joke, nor am I under orders. I came here of my own volition."
The next question was obvious. "Why me?"
Rei's expression became completely neutral. "You are one of only two males I have regular contact with. To ask this of the Commander would be inappropriate. You were my only other choice."
Shinji palmed his forehead with his hand. "So that's it?" he asked dolefully. "A lack of options? That's all?" he was beginning to sound disgusted with the whole thing. Misato rummaged around in the background, oblivious as usual.
"Do not misunderstand. If I did not view you in- a certain way, I would not consider asking you at all," Rei offered, trying unsuccessfully to dispel his unhappiness.
The second sentence piqued his interest. "What? A- What way?" Shinji stuttered, more confused than he had been during his first visit to NERV.
"I do not know how to say it clearly," the blue-haired girl stated. "I... Like you, Shinji," she said truthfully, once again using the Third's first name.
Shinji's brain was reeling from a one-two punch. First, for some inexplicable reason, Ayanami had come to his home, proposed to him (in deadpan, of course) and said she was serious (he still didn't get it). Then, after asking him to marry her, for God's sake, then she told him she liked him. All the rules of social interaction were no match for Ayanami's get-to-the-point conversation freight train.
To say the Third Child was startled, teetering on the brink of depression, righteous rage, epic sadness, and happiness on a scale undreamed of by the heavenly choir themselves, would be correct. However, a man leaning in four directions at once finds it difficult to fall at all, much less in a particular direction. Why, Rei could be acting under orders and orders to deny those orders, could be toying with his emotions for the hell of it, trying to gage his reaction for the hell of it, or be serious as all hell and want a honeymoon. Oh, what is a boy to do?
Stagger around and steady himself by grabbing hold of the fridge, apparently.
"Shinji, are you unwell?" Rei asked, now genuinely concerned. For the Third to die before giving her an answer, and perhaps even expire because of her question, would be horrible. Also, ironic. But mostly very bad.
Part of him wanted to respond, Oh, sure, just peachy Ayanami! I'm just trying to figure out why God feels the need to twist my life into a hundred thousand knots for his own amusement! but that wouldn't go over well and he probably couldn't say it properly anyway. He settled for a few gasps of air and a nice, firm "No, I'm just f- fine."
The First Child, attempting to be helpful, asked if her counterpart required some water. What she did not ask is if he needed some time to think it over, which was exactly what she hoped he wouldn't need. Unfortunately, he didn't need her to ask.
"Ayanami, I'm sorry, but, I, uh," Shinji mouthed, wiping his nose. "Could I just, um, think about it for a while?" he stuttered, remembering someone telling him once that stalling for time was the only thing he was good at. It was a terrible thing to say, especially for a schoolteacher, but it stuck with him. (Yes, his life sucked)
The First Child's face beamed with quiet acceptance, which means her appearance didn't really change at all. Inside, though, she was regretting the present situation and felt that she could have handled it better somehow, but was fully aware that she couldn't do anything about it and might as well just let Shinji have his time. To this end, she straightened her collar and said, tactfully, "You may think for as long as you wish."
Shinji breathed a sigh of relief, which he didn't really care if she noticed.
Rei turned to leave. "You have my telephone number, correct?" at his nod, she said, "If you have anything further to ask you may reach me at home. I will be at Headquarters from seven to ten tomorrow morning."
The blue-haired girl slipped past the quivering Child, noticing that he averted his eyes as she passed. She touched the pad beside the door, and turned her head.
"Farewell," and she was gone. The door closed silently behind her, leaving Shinji alone in the kitchen.
Misato chose this exact moment to emerge from her room. "Well, I got all my clothes back in the closet!" she laughed, grinning broadly and giving the dejected boy a thumbs-up. Upon noticing his crestfallen expression, she frowned and stepped forward a little bit, wondering if it was something she should worry about or just the kid being generally moody.
Shinji said nothing.
Misato, taking it upon herself to cheer him up, shouted cheerfully, "Whatsa matter? Did Rei ask you to marry her or something?"
