Ok, here's a fanfiction that I just wrote, I was asked to write it by my friend Shelby, and so this is dedicated to her. lol, it's not done, and nowhere near it. enjoy!!

disclaimer: i DO not OWN Naruto. I'm not that creative.


Sitting at his kitchen table Hatake Kakashi looked into his tea. It smelt good, like a new yet familiar fragrance wafting in the air, and it was a murky brown color, it just swirled around and around under his gaze. He sighed and shifted, sitting up straight when he felt Iruka enter the room. Iruka just looked at Kakashi, the man he thought he had loved, but didn't after all. Kakashi's breath hitched when Iruka spoke, addressing the white haired man.

"Kakashi… We… I think that…" He paused and turned away, not being able to get it out now. Kakashi stood up and moved toward him, but Iruka only moved away. "No, please don't. Kakashi, I'm leaving." The taller man closed his eyes and put a hand on his nose, trying to hold the tension there at bay. "Tomorrow, Asuma is coming and helping me move my stuff to my new apartment." He turned to look at Kakashi and noticed what he was doing. He only did this when he was trying to suppress a headache or stop himself from crying.

"Alright, I understand. Tomorrow, I'd like that key back then." Iruka nodded stiffly, he'd wanted to keep the key, what if he regretted doing this? He mentally slapped himself; of course Kakashi wouldn't accept him back after he broke his heart. Iruka moved to go back into the room they had once shared, but hadn't as of the last few months.

Kakashi grabbed his arm at the elbow and stopped the younger man. "I mean it, no more buttering me up, and no more using me, no more. You leaving is the final straw, my heart will finally be broken, and not even you will be able to fix it." Kakashi's threatening tone made Iruka scared and shocked that he'd talk to him like that. Iruka's shocked face was enough to make Kakashi continue when he wasn't going to. "I'm going to spend the night with a friend, you have fun alone in my bed for the last time, and I'll be back by ten. Good night."

He swung Iruka around and hugged him close before disappearing out the door, leaving Iruka to cry on the kitchen floor. As the older, naturally white haired man seemed to have wings with how fast he moved across town to the bar that Iruka hadn't known Kakashi usually went to after Iruka confessed Kakashi's deepest fear to him a month ago.

"Kakashi, we need to talk." Iruka turned over on the couch after his nap was interrupted by Kakashi making dinner. Kakashi had just gotten a promotion and was in the happiest of moods, he didn't think anything could bring him down. He nodded and made sure that the food was ok for a few minutes so he could walk out and not burn it. He walked over and sat next to Iruka and took his hands in his. He could tell something was wrong when Iruka wouldn't meet his eyes.

"Love, you ok?" He said worriedly, but Iruka only slid his hands out of Kakashi's and started wringing them in his lap. Kakashi looked at Iruka seriously now, he had bags under his beautiful brown eyes, his hair was messed up from his nap, and he kept sighing like there was something building in his chest and he was trying to get it off him.

"Don't… please don't call me Love anymore…" and Kakashi's world slipped from his fingers. "Kakashi, we're not going to work out like I'd hoped we would. Things haven't been the same for quite awhile now, and I've been trying I really have and I really don't know how to make it all work out, and I'm just not…" He made the mistake of looking up, the white haired man was crying, his hand on his nose, after failing to hold the tension in."Oh, oh, no, please don't cry! No…" Kakashi got up and walked into the kitchen and finished dinner, they ate in silence and afterwards like usual Iruka did dishes when Kakashi cooked. While he was doing them he never realized Kakashi slipped out of the Apartment until he was done.

Every night since than Kakashi had been going to this bar, He wouldn't get drunk, he just needed a place to sit and think without people bothering him. Occasionally there would be someone who'd walk over once they were drunk and they'd try to get him to dance or talk to them. He'd talk to them; sure he wasn't rude after all. But he wouldn't move from his spot at all either, so dancing was a big NO. Walking into the bar was Gai; he had a woman with him he didn't recognize.

"Kakashi!! My, my, no Iruka? I was sure I'd find you two together, not just one of you!!" He slid into the both seat across from him, allowing the woman the outer seat. She nodded her thanks and just sat watching them both, unsure of why Gai had pulled her in here to meet two people. By looking at the white haired stranger she noticed he looked really sad, lonely and she knew he wasn't paying attention to Gai. To help Gai out before he started in on something with a big long 'oh the youth!' speech she nudged the other man's leg under the table, he looked up at her and she tilted her head toward Gai.

"No, no Iruka. I'm not with Iruka anymore. Asuma's coming to help move stuff to the new Apartment." She raised an eyebrow, she knew there was something he wasn't telling, but she couldn't tell what. Gai looked like a fish caught out of water and she giggled because his face was just so funny when he did that. Gai looked at her and blinked, seemingly forgetting she was there. She sighed and stretched a hand out to Kakashi.

"Konichiwa, I'm Shel. I am guessing you are Kakashi from What Gai-sempai yelled out when we walked in." He reached over and shook her hand. They both noticed the shock that went through their hands when they touched. She smiled at him and he only looked skeptically.

"Yes… Hatake Kakashi's the name, don't wear it out." He joked; he mentally slapped himself. What am I doing?? I just broke up with Iruka, why am I flirting with someone new, a woman even. That shocked him, he was partial to guys, noting him and Iruka, but to think of this woman as more that she appeared before him, it would have never passed through him before tonight. After an hour or two of talking, Gai had gotten so drunk that Kakashi offered to help her get him home. "So tell me Shel, How do you know Gai here." She sighed and stared at the sky for a minute.

"My cousin, we're related I guess you could say, but only through marriage. My cousin married his cousin so that makes us distant cousins, and recently my immediate family has charged me with getting to know his family, as tradition in our family. So here I am, getting to know Gai… who is one of the worst drunks I have ever seen." She poked his cheek and gave him a sheepish grin over Gai's drooping head. He couldn't help it, he smiled back.

Something about Shel made him forget Iruka, infact until this moment he hadn't had Iruka on his mind since he got shocked shaking her hand hours ago. This is unusual to say the least because he always thought about Iruka. He got so caught up in his thoughts that he almost walked straight past Gai's apartment. He stopped when Shel jumped in front of him and put her hand on his chest, getting his attention.

"We're here." She pointed to the right and he slowly looked, and sweat dropped mumbling little things as he got Gai inside and onto his bed. He didn't feel like undressing and tucking in his friend, instead he walked out and shut the door on the now snoring green clad man. "I'm sorry about this, thank you for helping me with him." He waved it off and sat next to her on the couch.

"It's fine, it's not the first time either. He actually does this about once or twice a month. I am glad, however, that I had such a beautiful woman escort us back." She blushed and he did a small bow from his seat.

"No problem Kakashi. So, I am wondering…" He raised his only visible eyebrow at her unfinished question, so she cleared her throat and tried asking again. "So, I've been wondering, why the mask? What're you hiding?" He chuckled, gets everyone… he thought turning to face her. "I mean, if its too forward you don't have to answer, but I was just wondering why, and what you would be hiding under it." She started rambling and stopped when he put a finger on her lips, silencing her.

He then pulled his hand back; amazed that she shocked him again; and pulled up his forehead protector and part of the mask down to show his scar and his red eye. She looked at him, still not sure why he would hide such a face, it wasn't hideous. She reached out a hand and placed a finger on the scar under his eye, looking at the contrasting blue and red eye, it amazed her, they were such brilliant colors set against each other, making the other stand out.

"If you think that was an answer you are sorely mistaken." She grinned when he looked shocked, he pulled away and placed his forehead protector and mask back in place. "So…" She turned away from him, suddenly remembering back to earlier that night when she met him. "So, Who's Iruka?" He visibly froze, she looked warily at him and he shook his head. He didn't want to talk about it, but he felt he could, and she'd understand completely. He sighed turned to sit straight on the couch, he placed his hands in his lap and looked like a little school boy about to tell the biggest secret ever and that he'd get in trouble for it.

"Iruka was my fiancé; that was until a month ago. We had been together… oh a good part of 3 years, almost 4. We had been happy, or so I thought. But I can be blind sometimes to what he wants." He stopped and waited for her to say something. But she just smiled and waited for him to continue. "Well, I'm not exactly sure exactly how we fell apart, we're both shinobi, but he's a teacher, I'm next in line for Hokage. I guess we were too different in the end," he shrugged, "but it happens right? I'm not going to let myself cry over him, I've done that enough this past month, and now that he's finally leaving… well I guess I have no choice but to move on right?" He looked pleadingly over at her.

"It's all up to what your heart is ready for. If you wanna cry over him, then go ahead, if you wanna leave him in the past, then go ahead, it's really all in how you decided to take life as well." She sat back against the couch and sighed, comfy, but not quite fully.

"You see, I've recently just got out of a long term relationship as well, but," she shrugged, eyes closed, she didn't see Kakashi staring at her in a couple of different ways, but she knew he was looking, "stuff happens, you just got to move on, and be smart about it, you can't let it keep you down.

"When I had realized this, and felt it in my heart," She placed a finger over her heart, "I was happy again. I think that if you chose wisely, you can be happy again to." She rolled her head and opened her left eye to look at the man she was giving relationship advice to.

He seemed to zone in and out over the next few minutes, she saw the battle going on inside himself, he didn't put on a mental mask for her, he'd already let her in. The physical strain of carrying Gai half the city with his weights on, and the mental and emotional strain of the battle of his heart wore him out and he fell asleep, he tilted till his head was on her shoulder and she placed her head against his. Now I'm comfy… She thought as she fell asleep.


ok, thanks for making it this far, it's late and i should have been in bed asleep hours ago, but! i wanted to get this part finished. this is easily the longest one i have written for just the first chapter!! hopefully i can keep making them long. so please review!! love ur comments, critisim and anything you'd like to say, unless its flames...