Author's Note:
Thanks, Morrigan, for assuring me that it really was okay to let this chapter stand at such a small word count. Don't worry, I promise that the next chapter is going to come hard on this one's heels and be far more substantial. In the meantime, won't you please go check out my other project at invisible_trace dot livejournal dot com?
~ooOOoo~
"There is a comfort in the strength of love
'Twill make a thing endurable
Which else would overset the brain
Or break the human heart." - William Wordsworth
~ooOOoo~
He ran. He didn't know what else to do, so he ran. At first something involving guns had certainly been a consideration. And for a brief moment, he'd darkly thought of applying said weapons to his parents. Or himself.
But his fingers had tangled once again in the rosary in his pocket, he'd taken a deep breath, and backed away from those dangerous thoughts. Clothing had been shed with complete disregard of his normally tidy habits. His movements were quick, erratic, and violent, as he tried to speed through the necessaries without thinking too much about the rest of the evening. He'd yanked a pair of running shorts and a T-shirt on, pocketed his keys and the rosary, laced on a pair of trainers, and was out the door once again.
~ooOOoo~
Jess wasn't crying this time. In fact, she'd been fighting the preposterous urge to laugh at the irony of it all ever since Becker left. She'd finally been offered her heart's desire only to find herself turning it down. How ridiculous was that?
She'd lain stretched out across her bed for close to an hour staring at the open black box which she'd taken back out of the bedside table drawer. The ring was beautiful. A beautiful carved gold scrollwork setting holding three half carat diamonds. Absolutely perfect. So why was it sitting in a box and not on her finger? Because I'm not willing to settle for anything less than all of him, Jess thought ruefully, and he's still holding back.
She tucked the box away in the drawer once again on top of the grey silk scarf that Becker still hadn't reclaimed. Slouching out of her room, she went into the bathroom to brush her teeth and get ready for bed.
Perhaps giving Becker an ultimatum would look less fool-hardy in the morning. But for the moment as she curled up beneath her blankets alone once again with her own words still whispering treacherously in her ears, Jess had serious doubts.
"I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you, Hilary. But until you stop holding back, I cannot accept. I'm not willing to settle for anything less than all of you. When you can give yourself to me completely, I'll be absolutely ecstatic to accept your proposal."
~ooOOoo~
"You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back." - Barbara DeAngelis
