Spoilers: S4 (though includes the name of Teyla's child from S5)
Warnings: A little angsty and sad. Future fic.
Disclaimers: I own no part of the Stargate world, I make no money from this endeavour. It allows me to let my muse out to play and to share the JT fun with the rest of the crowd.
Notes: Written for the 'Thingathon 2008' which can be found at the John and Teyla Fic LiveJournal page (pls go and check out all the great postings people have been putting up; fic, art and vids). This fic was written in response to the prompt from Gater101: her prompt #1 for the fic to include: 'life, pleasure, leadership and destruction'.
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Halling sat in the afternoon summer sunshine and watched the sons of Teyla Emmagan. Torren and Korlen circled one another in the sparring ring, their eyes bright with playfulness as they leapt at one another. To any outsider the ferocious clashing of bantos staves looked like a vicious dance of violence, but Halling could see with a knowing eye the laziness of their strikes, and the pleasure in their eyes.
They had long ago surpassed Teyla's own excellent skills; their unique biology born from both their parents' Wraith given genes had graced them with amazing strength and speed. And though Korlen was Torren's younger by almost six years, he could hold his own against his older brother. They could both shake off a blow that would have beaten down any other man their size and they had healed quickly from wounds that had terrified even their mother's calm composure.
They had grown up sparring together, confident that only with each other could they really test their superior skills. Halling watched them leap and clash against each other with godlike speed and agility. At times he had found himself envying the boys their skills and youthful joy of life. Though they were no longer boys he reminded himself; they had been men for many years.
It was difficult still for Halling to remember that so many years had passed. His own son, Jinto, was fully gown, married and a father. Halling loved his grandchildren, but there were days when he wished his boy was young again. That the remembered pain and suffering reflected in his son's eyes from their days as captives of Michael would no longer exist. But, that would never happen he knew. The Athosian people had been reduced to such small numbers now, and Halling foresaw the day in a few generations when the Athosian people would disappear. Some had already left to form families on other worlds, and he wished them well and was pleased that that the Athosian bloodlines would go on, yet he could not help feeling regret at all that had been lost. Old Athos felt so very long ago. And the survivors of Michael's experiment, returned to health by Doctor Beckett's kind hard work, still bore all the scars of their change. Most had never returned to their former strength and health after Michael.
Kanaan had survived to see his second son, Korlen, born and then he had succumbed to his weakened heart. Halling had thought the weakness poetically ironic, considering the sadness all could see in Teyla's eyes after Atlantis' destruction. She had chosen to help nurse Kanaan and the other returned Athosians back to full health, which had meant that she and Torren had not been on Atlantis when it had been mysteriously destroyed. Atlantis felt so very long ago.
Halling looked up at the passing clouds over head, his neck aching very slightly with his growing age. It was a good feeling, as it was a reminder that the legacy of a short culled life from before was at an end. He had already lived longer than either his father, grandmother or any of his family had before him. And he still had decades of life left to live. Now the Wraith were controlled and culled themselves, humans across the galaxy could flourish. Again, that had mostly been due to the people from Earth, their leadership and determination not to let the darkness win. A people who had entered into this galaxy from far across the heavens, changed everything and then had abruptly disappeared again. Halling felt nothing but respect and gratefulness for those people. Yet, their presence had left many wounds; wounds unlikely to ever fully heal.
Halling's gaze shifted back down from the white puffy clouds overhead, looking past the sparring boys to Teyla's middle son; two decades old now, a man in his own right. Junior, as he was affectionately known, stood watching his brothers spar, jeering them appropriately and teasing their slowness. He was unlike his brothers in many ways. He shared most of their speed, strength and their ability to handle almost anything, yet it was clear to anyone looking upon the brothers together that he was different to them. Where Torren and Korlen were wide shouldered with pitch black hair, Junior stood slightly taller, narrower of shoulder and his long dark brown hair outlined his high cheek boned face. He was slightly more handsome than his brothers, which he chose to remind them of frequently when they tried to taunt him into a sparring match. But it was his paler skin and hazel green eyes that made it clear his heritage varied from his brothers.
Halling had been unaware that Teyla and Sheppard had become intimate, though their affection for each other had been obvious to all from the start. Sheppard had visited her regularly during the nursing of the returned and she had travelled to Atlantis equally as much. She had never spoken of what had happened between her and Sheppard, but what she had made clear was that he had been unaware of her pregnancy at the time he was lost. Halling wondered whether that made it easier or worse for Teyla. He wondered if she and Sheppard had planned a family together, or had Junior been a twist of fate, that now time and circumstance had made so much more poignant.
Halling saw in her eyes, even now after all these years, the sorrow at the loss of both Atlantis and John Sheppard. She chose to believe he had survived with the rest of his people and had fled back to Earth through the Stargate, but no one really knew. They had never returned to this galaxy, not even via their ship. Perhaps they had all been lost along with the City of the Ancestors?
All the Athosians remembered Sheppard and his son's presence among them was considered an honour, not something to be whispered about. Junior had grown up listening to stories of his lost brave father. Even now matured and grown Junior could often still be found sitting with his mother some nights asking to hear the stories of Atlantis and of her adventures with his father. Junior must have heard them hundreds of times growing up, but he still wanted to hear them. Teyla would smile, stroke his hair and told him with a strong voice, yet sad eyes, of how her life had been all those many years ago.
Junior volunteered for night watch more than any one else and Halling had often witnessed him sitting out in the night, eyes turned up to the bright twinkling stars above, and he suspected Junior was not looking for Wraith ships, but imagining that magical world out there called Earth. Halling wondered what it was like for the young man, growing up in the shadow of his absent heroic father. Halling wondered what it must have been like for Kanaan.
After Atlantis had been lost Teyla had remained alone for two years with her two sons, until one day she had moved her family into Kanaan's tent. Though it had pleased Kanaan and they had lived happily enough together bearing Korlen a year later, Halling knew it had been a surrender on Teyla's part. The sorrow had still been there in her eyes, and after Kanaan's death it had only grown. The only real pleasure Halling ever saw in her aging, yet still so beautiful eyes was the love for her sons. She loved them equally, yet Junior remained the closest to her.
Out of the three sons Junior displayed more of the leadership skills of his mother, and worked to assist her in her duties of leading their people. Most expected him to eventually take Teyla's place, though many had confessed to Halling that they suspected he would leave before that day ever arrived. His heart appeared to belong somewhere else, perhaps out amongst the stars. Not that he did not work steadfastly for the camp, nor love them all. He devised many new ideas for the camp, such as his latest plans to improve the water supply. But, he was always the first to head out alone to explore new lands on New Athos, or to volunteer for trades to other worlds. Halling suspected that Junior volunteered to travel between gates so often because he secretly hoped to one day walk into his father. That day had never arrived, but through his kind manner, polite strength and humour he had made friends with their trading partners and had learnt many new recounted tales of the people from Atlantis.
Halling regarded the handsome young man who stood now watching his brothers, one booted foot hitched up on the fence railing. He leant casually against the fence; the mannerism so hauntingly familiar of his father that it pulled at Halling's heart. He wondered how Teyla could stand it some days. It was strange, yet heart warming, to see the son mimic the father he had never known. The smile and tilt of his chin as he teased his brothers was closer to Teyla's though.
Halling suspected that Teyla would never fully heal from Atlantis' destruction during her absence or from never having learnt Sheppard's ultimate fate. It was painful to think that Sheppard may never know he had such a strong capable son that looked so like him. Perhaps he had survived and was living back on Earth. Maybe he had married and had other children back there. Halling could only hope that if the man was alive, that he was happy, though Halling also hoped he still felt Teyla's absence as she obviously felt his.
Teyla's voice carried through the breeze and Halling watched her join Junior at the sparring ring fence. Her long lightly greying hair hung in a long braid down to the middle of her back, and she smiled brightly at her boys. Junior wrapped an arm around her shoulders and briefly hugged her to him before he began to climb into the sparring ring, to the jeers and beckoning of his brothers. He could just about hold his own against them as his own mixed genes of the Wraith and of the Ancestors appeared to empower him somewhat. Yet, he fought differently; with more caution, more thought, more care.
The bantos rods slammed together and Junior laughed with his brothers. Their voices filled with pleasure in each other's presence warmed the cold areas of Halling's heart that had been so lost in memories of what was gone. He watched the sparring, laughing himself at Junior's sneaky swipe at Korlen's leg, which had the younger man hopping with pain, clutching his shin and swearing at his laughing brothers.
It was a good family, yet incomplete. Halling sent out a silent pray to the Ancestors, asking that the family could once again be complete. Though Kanaan was dead and John possibly was too, Halling still prayed for the wishful gift.
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END.
