Yeah, I'm starting another story. I've had the idea for awhile, so now it's time to write it down. It's another Hwoarang/Julia, my favorite pairing. Constructive criticism is always appreciated, but please no flames. You're just wasting your breath. Anyway, you know how I like those reviews, so please do it if you have the time.

Those of you who read "Wanderer" or "Something Real": The reason I haven't updated in awhile is because I have a AP exam this Friday, and then my AP History final for school the following Monday, so I gotta be studying more than writing, unfortunately. Just an FYI if you're wondering. School sucks.


You move in slow motion

Everything goes by so fast

Just slow down a little,

Save the best part for last

You speak in riddles

And your intentions turn me on

I'm yours forever

Will you love me when I'm gone?

When I'm gone

…It's you I admire

My living example…

It's you I admire

"Admiration" by Incubus


I'd like to think it was simply a coincidence, insignificant déjà vu. Or if you're really into that destiny crap, then you could call it fate. But to this day I'm still not one hundred positive what it all was exactly…

I can still remember the day I first saw Baek Doo San.

It was raining heavily, the sun was suffocated with gray clouds, the sky had moaned with thunder, and I remember I had on a pair of muddy, crappy blue sneakers. Don't ask, but those memories were vivid. He was tall, strong build, long dark hair tied back in a low ponytail, and I'd thought he was the coolest guy ever; I was only thirteen after all, and was in desperate need of a hero. When I was five, my mother (who I'd later discover had been hooked on meth) deposited me on the front doorstep of the Kim Hee Orphanage when she decided that she couldn't handle her addiction and a child at the same time. I didn't understand anything back then, the loneliness or sudden change of environment. Everyone lied to me that Mother would eventually come back—but I was never a dumb kid. No doubt I shed many tears, but I learned to cope, grew stronger. There will always be that ache in my heart, that missing piece, but I don't let the past dictate my future.

And as for my father…well, I don't even know or care who the hell he is, but I'm guessing he was either just as fucked up or more so than my mother. But trust me, when a kid has lost his family, his home, and all of his dreams in one moment, he'll do anything to find joy, that little pleasure, no matter how subtle or brief. As I sought this joy, the orphanage slowly hardened me into a fierce, troublesome, independent thirteen-year-old. I was a natural fighter, a survivor, and when families tried to adopt me they always ended up sending me back a week later. Let's just say I was anything but the model child. I stole, I swore, picked petty fights, I was rude…but I wasn't always like that. No, I wasn't always like that, nobody is. We are all born innocent and pure, but all it can take is one moment, no matter how small, to change everything.

When I first saw Baek Doo San deliver that vicious flying sidekick at a Tae Kwon Do demonstration, and when he asked to see me, I decided, Hey, its time for a change.

"Hello, I'm Doo San Baek. And what is your name?" he'd asked simply, taking a seat beside me on the playground bench.

There was something about him that I'd liked instantly. Baek didn't speak to me as if I was an ignorant child, or as if I was some leper just because I lacked responsible parents. He looked me squarely in the eyes, his smiles were genuine, and I sensed in him the family I desired, that little joy I'd been seeking. Not to mention I also wanted to learn how to kick ass like him.

"Nae iroom-oon Doo San Hwoarang imnida," I replied, and Baek had laughed heartily. He got the message, seeing how my legal name was Myong Lee Hwoarang. (A/N: My name is Hwoarang Doo San)

After that, I've been living with him since.

That's how it all started I guess. Baek was everything to me: my father, my home, and my teacher. He instructed me in Tae Kwon Do until I nearly mastered the art of fighting and could beat him every time we sparred. He helped me through my struggles, and attempted to mold me into a good, civilized man with his wisdom.

To repay him for everything he's done, I work two jobs to help pay the bills, teach a few Tae Kwon Do classes in his place—and, I formed a gang.

Gang life was exhilarating; I'd never known such awesome freedom until then. I became leader at fifteen, and pretty soon I had a membership of seven. We were a rowdy, troublesome bunch, and most of the things we did for fun weren't very law abiding, and that's what made it so great. We all knew martial arts, and it was this shared aspect that really began to bring in the cash. Every other day or so my gang and I would challenge rival or neighboring gangs to fights, and we'd make it like we were losing. After all of my gang members had been "defeated" and when the stakes were high, it was my turn—and I beat 'em all the time. It was pretty funny to see the angered looks on their faces, but a deal was a deal, and out came the cash. We always split it up evenly between us, and I'd bring my share home to Baek. But, of course, he highly disapproved of it.

"This is dishonest, Hwoarang! Get a real job for heaven's sake! Stop prancing around with this idiot fighting; that's not how life works!" he'd yelled after he'd refused to accept the money.

"What! I can't believe you're turning this down! This extra money will help us, Baek."

"I don't care if you brought home a million dollars with your goddamn street fighting. What's next, Hwoarang? Will it be drug dealing, or perhaps robbery? That brings in easy money too. Will you be just like your mother, Hwoarang?"

If he had been anyone else, I would have kicked him where it hurt men most. But all I did was pocket the wad of money and stalk out. Of course my guardian was always right, but did that stop me? Nope.

I remember we hadn't spoken to one another for a week. He'd even threatened to throw me out one day when I'd entered the house with a full head of red-orange hair. However, after realizing that he'd always love me and after recognizing that his efforts to create a "civilized, polite" man were futile, my guardian stopped trying to control me. I loved him more than anything, respected him, but I'd been born with a wild spirit, a rebellious streak, something nobody could tame or take control of. Baek eventually understood this, and often had to drag my ass out of serious trouble, or reprimand me, but it was all he could really do.

Fights, easy cash, drugs, alcohol, and the best times and best friends of my life came from that gang. They were my other family. However, I hadn't been expecting to find love within it too. I wasn't even looking for it, but I guess it found me first. And man, it was like a whole different world altogether.

We already had one girl in my gang, Arumee Song Juk, and that was my limit. Not that I have anything against women, but there was just so much I could take. Don't get me wrong: Arumee is awesome, like a sister, and she's a talented martial artist, but she can be kind of annoying at times, she and her "feminine problems."

However, when I saw Alexxi Kim Sun, I decided to make an exception.

She was beautiful, slender figure, cute smile, but it was the hair that caught my eye. Stupid, I know, but I have a thing for hair. Hers was cut short, just slightly shorter than shoulder length, and thick strands of it were colored a deep blue. It blended in with her dark hair, but when the light hit it, it shone with a metallic shimmer.

"Cool hair," I greeted, leaning against the brick wall beside her.

She smiled, smoothing a hand over her torn jeans. Several silver and black bracelets adorned her wrists, and her dark blue nail polish contrasted sharply with her skin. "Komap sumnida. I did it myself." (A/N: Thank you)

She looked away, taking a languorous drag from her cigarette. The blue-haired girl exhaled, then flicked away the stub, her gaze returning to me. I felt her eyes examine my body, then my hair, and I knew she liked what she saw. I'm not conceited (well ok, maybe just a little) but I know that most women find me attractive. She was bold, unafraid, confident, and it was an automatic turn on. She reminded me of me in a way.

"Yours ain't too bad either. Looks like the roots are showin' though. I could redo it for you," she said with a wry smile, pulling out another cigarette.

I returned the smile, and gently took the pack of cigarettes from her, pocketing it.

"Sure…only if you promise to quit smoking," I replied.

The girl rolled her eyes and shook her head. The black eyeliner she wore accentuated her even darker eyes, and I wondered how her full lips would feel against mine. I've had my share of girlfriends and one night stands, but this particular woman possessed something I'd never seen before, something I craved. I sensed that fire, that spark of life within her that had been absent in the other women I've been with.

"So, Hwoarang, you gonna tell me your name or do I have to ask?"

Laughing, I said, "Looks like you already know it."

"Well, you're only the leader of the strongest gang in this part of Seoul. I just wanted you to tell me in person."

"You're an interesting character. But my name is Hwoarang." I liked her even more now.

The woman smiled, satisfied, running a pale hand through her unusual hair. "I'm Alexxi."

We talked for a long time, walking alongside one another down the street as the sun descended in the sky. I felt like I'd known Alexxi forever, and my mouth hurt from smiling and laughing so much. She was different than everyone else. Alexxi was the light in my gray world, a breath of fresh air, and she stirred in me emotions I'd never thought possible of feeling. Apparently she and I shared that same wild spirit, and it was even possible that Alexxi was more rebellious than I was. That possibility was both frightening and exciting at the same time. Once, I watched her steal a car easily, swiftly, with the cops just a few blocks away, and afterwards I'd been so shocked I could only stare in awe, admiration—and just a little bit of fear. What if one day she wasn't careful? And believe me, when I begin to question breaking the law, then it was a serious problem. But the thing was, Alexxi never got caught. Sure she's gotten close to getting her ass dragged to jail several times, but she was too quick, too elusive.

And to me, that was so fucking sexy.

But thrill wasn't the only reason Alexxi stole. For instance, some poor, ragged looking kid is crying on the street, hungry and alone. I would have passed him by with no more than a pitiful glance, but Alexxi made me wait on the curb to watch the kid, left briefly, and then came back with a pocketful of goods. She'd managed to steal him a couple pieces of candy from the nearby convenience store, and I watched with fascination as she handed the food to the child. As she gently spoke to the frail looking creature, I watched as a smile broke out on the kid's face, and then, laughter. She had a gift, that Alexxi, an ability to bring joy to anyone's day no matter how dismal.

"Hey, here's my cell number. You call when you need anythin' else, ok?" she'd said to the child.

"You sure that was a smart idea?" I'd asked her afterwards.

Alexxi shrugged. "It's just a kid. He needs someone, and from the looks of it, I'm the only one he's got."

"But he's a stranger."

"So what. There's nothing wrong with helping people, Hwoarang. If you only help people you know, then what's the point? Besides, I don't want him to turn out like me—a stupid thief. I want those poor kids to know that good people do exist out there."

And she was a good person, she truly was, regardless of how many times she broke the rules.

I keep hearing about love and how great it is, how it'll change everything, and I always wondered about that certain moment when you knew it, when you knew that you loved someone. But now I understand.

After that, I knew I loved Alexxi.


Four days later I introduced her to the gang and everyone welcomed her warmly, even Arumee, who's the most jealous girl I know. Alexxi was friendly to everyone, and I discovered that I wasn't the only one with a smile on my face with her presence. But unlike my gang members, Alexxi had no experience in martial arts whatsoever. When angered or in danger she could deliver a decent punch, react on instinct, but she'd never received proper training, which was a shame. Alexxi would have made a wonderful fighter. However, she made up for it with her knife, a weapon she wielded with unmatched expertise and kept hidden in her boots.

"A pretty girl like you doesn't need a knife," Jinha had joked once, but Alexxi had only smiled.

"The world's a dangerous place. You gotta be prepared," she'd replied.

After everyone had left to go home, there was just Alexxi and I left. We strolled silently down the darkened streets once again, the dim orange glow of the lamp posts casting gloomy shadows across the concrete. Alexxi discreetly slid her hand in mine and for once she wasn't talking or cracking jokes. She merely closed her eyes, inhaled the night air deeply, and then leaned her head against my shoulder.

"Arumee told me about your parents and the orphanage," she murmured suddenly, looking up at me.

I stiffened instantly. How dare Arumee! That information was private!

But Alexxi recognized my thoughts instantly, and quickly added, "No, no, don't get mad at her. She was only protecting you, that's all. She told me that you'd been through a lot, then gave me the old 'If you hurt him I'll kick your ass' deal. Don't worry, she just cares about you. They all care about you."

I relaxed, but I was still slightly angered at Arumee's action. At the same time I felt love and gratitude towards Arumee for attempting to protect me, although I think Alexxi could kick her ass any day. My hand tightened on Alexxi's and I sighed slightly.

"Well…yeah, it was difficult, but that life is over," I replied solemnly.

Alexxi stopped walking and lifted my hand to her mouth, kissing my knuckles softly. The skin tingled and I felt a slight blush come to my cheeks.

"It might be, but the memories still remain, don't they. I'll be there for you though, Hwoarang," she murmured, and it was one of those rare moments when I actually saw Alexxi serious.

I let my gaze linger on her for a second longer, then took her face between my hands and kissed her deeply. Alexxi wasn't timid about it, and clearly had had lots of experience, because she responded immediately, her mouth warm, tongue bold, and I closed my eyes, losing myself in the moment.

After what seemed like forever we parted, breathless, and I ran a hand through my hair to prevent it from reaching for her again. From the look on her face I knew that she'd enjoyed the kiss as much as I had, and Alexxi grinned, the familiar fire returning to her eyes. I smiled slowly, gazing down at her.

"Well don't get cocky yet, mister. I've had better," she insisted, tossing her head in a manner that caused a laugh to escape my mouth.

"Oh really?" I retorted and kissed her again.

After that, we continued our walk, and headed for Alexxi's house. She began to softly hum a tune, throwing her hands up in the air, and pretty soon Alexxi was dancing down the sidewalk, her blue hair shimmering, long legs kicking, and her laughter echoing into the night.

"Oh God, I must look like a total idiot, don't I? But when I'm with you, Hwoarang," she laughed, throwing her arms about my neck, "when I'm with you, I don't have a care in the world. Everything fades away. Do get what I'm saying?"

And all I could do was smile, because that was exactly what I'd been trying to tell her all along. She was so full of life, so beautiful and good, and I couldn't help but kiss her again. That ache, that missing piece, was slowly being mended.

"It's only been a week Hwoarang, but you know what?" she said quietly as we reached the front porch of her house.

"What?" I whispered, clasping her to me once more.

"I think I might love you," she replied nonchalantly, then broke away from me, entering her house without another word or backward glance.

Smiling, I turned in the opposite direction to head home.


So what did you think? Good? Horrible? Any suggestions? Review!