This Idea came to me when I saw a picture on the interwebz


Lucy Heartfillia was by all means, a normal person. So it was only natural that when Natsu asked her how to make love, and what making love is, she blushed and stuttered.

"N-Natsu, Why would you ask me that? Baka!" She exclaimed, slamming her fist down on his skull.

"Gray and Gajeel were talking about how they wanted to 'make love' to Juvia and Levy, so asked them what it was, and they told me to ask you. So what is making love? How do I make it? Can I eat it?" He questioned, eyes gleaming at a chance to eat a foreign food.

Lucy was seething, Gray and Gajeel were the ones who got her into this-this mess? Oh when she got her hands on them-!

A small smile bloomed on her face as she came up with a devious plan.

"Come on Natsu, I'll show you." She commanded, standing up. Lucy grabbed her keys and jacket, and took off to the store.


Natsu and Lucy stepped inside Lucy's house, with Natsu carrying a huge wooden block, and Lucy was carrying a bag full of carving supplies.

Lucy giggled at Natsu, who was pouting because he was the one who had to carry the huge wooden block.

Natsu set it down on the table, and with directions from Lucy, began to chip away at the wood.


By the time they were finished, the block had turned into four letters, spelling out Love, and the o had a heart instead of a circle in the middle.

It was painted a pink color, with yellow specks on it.

Lucy smiled proudly at her accomplishment, then she made Natsu watch a series of puberty videos that they showed little kids in heath classes, and some other videos telling him excatly what S** was. Natsu looked up from the last video, horrified.

"I think I'm gonna be sick..." He said, clamping a hand over his mouth.

Lucy clapped him on the back, "You're going to be fine," She grinned "We have to get to the guild so I can give a couple fools their punishment." Lucy licked her lips in anticipation.

Natsu quickly followed, hoping it Ice-princess was one of the fools.


When they got to the guild doors, Lucy turned to Natsu and smiled brightly, "I'm going to release a very scary aura, don't get too scared, kay?"

Natsu just rolled his eyes.

Lucy kicked the door open, releasing a very scary aura.

A table came flying at her face, and she shot a blast of celestial magic out of her hand, destroying the table. Lucy scanned the guild hall, until she found her prey. She stomped over to them, grabbed they're collars, and hung them like that from her hands.

"Gajeel, Gray." She growled "Just what did you think you were doing when you told Natsu to come ask me about making babies?"

They both gulped. She could be scarier than Erza sometimes!

"W-we-" Gray started, but was cut off my a now fuming Lucy

"You will be punished. Also, you are not allowed to attend the drinking contest tonight, as you will be cleaning my apartment." She growled.

"Yes Lucy." They sighed.

"Good, now, let's go have a swim, shall we?" She carried the boys out the door and threw them into the torture pit, as they liked to call it.

The torture pit consisted of the following, Skarks, alligators, piranhas and any other deadly creature you can think of.

Lucy threw them in there for about 15 minutes, then took them out and sent them to her house.

They walked back into the guild, and talked to Erza, Levy and Lisanna.

"So, what's new?" Erza asked.

"Lucy and I made love!" Natsu declared triumphantly. The whole guild stopped what they were doing. It was so silent, you would be able to hear a pen drop from a mile away. Mira fainted, Cana choked.

Lucy smacked Natsu on the back of his head, and stood up on the table.

"It's not what you think! We made a little word art thing because Natsu over here, wanted to know how to make love. Then I made him watch a series of puberty videos." I objected.

The guild cheered. Natsu was no longer innocent!

And with that statement, the guild's drinking contest was underway.

All the participants lined up at the bar and began to drink. Lucy wasn't going to drink much, but she was going to have a beer or two. She bit her lip, watching Natsu carefully as he drank.


"Lushi~" Natsu slurred, "Let's go home~" He began to whine.

"Let me finish my beer." Lucy sighed.

"Okay~" He laid his head on my lap. "Lushi, your so pretty."

Lucy almost spit out her drink in shock, but swallowed, knowing he was hammered. She sighed, rubbing her temples. Tonight was going to be a long night

The girls at the table snickered at her, and she flipped them off.

She sighed once more, before standing up and dragging Natsu out of Fairy Tail.


They got in the door, and by this time, Natsu was trying to give Lucy a kiss.

She sighed, "No Natsu, I would kiss you if you were sober, but you are hammered. Now, let's get you to bed."

Usually when this happens, he'll follow her without any complaints.

Instead, his muscular arms wrapped around her midsection, and he whispered in her ear, "What if I am sober?" She turned around, to see Natsu smirking at her seductively. He leaned in to kiss her, and she responded by cutting him off.

"Are you sure about this?" Lucy asked. She felt Natsu nod. "Are you okay with this?" He asked back. She rolled her eyes, leaning in to kiss Natsu.

Their lips touched, and they found a rhythm quickly. When they had to break apart for air, she whispered in his ear,

"Let me show you what making love is."

She pulled him into her room, and shut the door.

Needless to say, neither of them got much sleep that night.