Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of the characters, they all belong to Masashi Kishimoto, but if I did own them, all of the female characters would be killed off almost immediately and it would be one big yaoi-palooza.
Warning: This is yaoi, intimate interaction between two males. If you do not like this kind of stuff or do not believe in it then please click the back arrow (located next to the forward arrow and on my internet it is on the far left side of the browser, if it is different on yours then please locate it now). And I hope the letters hit you on the way out and scar you for life, because yaoi is my one true passion and you have destroyed it in a burning red flame of homophobic hatred…
Important: This is an Alternate Universe fanfiction, set in basically this time period, maybe in the 1980's or 1990's, but basically normal.
This is dedicated to blueball who requested a DeiSaso one shot, I hope you like it!!
-x-
New Year's Eve was always a time that Sasori hated, it was a sorry excuse to get drunk and party until all hours of the night, though he supposed anyone could do it at any time, but this night made that okay. Even the minors in his class were talking about drinking and partying, to him, it was meaningless and pathetic.
Sure, his friends always tried to get him out into a bar or two on New Year's Eve, but he would turn always turn them down. Mostly because when they were drunk, they were unbearable to be around, Itachi, who just turned eighteen, becomes irritable, very easily, Hidan, who is also eighteen, just gets into fights, and when Sasori, who is currently seventeen gets drunk, he gets over stimulated… easily…
Yes, it was his most hated holiday, he couldn't bring himself to want to join in the festivities.
While the artistic redhead was musing about his hatred for this particular day that was coming up, he heard his phone ring.
"Hello?"
"Hey fucker!"
It was Hidan.
"Hi."
And Itachi.
The artist could never understand how his friends could work mobile phones, but they were sure as hell better then him at it. Calling someone was a feat that he had recently overcame.
"What do you three want?" He asked boredly.
"What are you doing for New Year's?"
Itachi often took over the conversation when more than two people were talking on the phone at the same time, he was just that kind of person, he had to take control of everything.
"The same as always, nothing."
"Come on you fucking prude! Why won't you just come with us for once in a damn while!!?"
Hidan was always crass and vulgar.
"Don't you have to go out with your boyfriend Itachi?"
Sasori ignored Hidan and asked the Uchiha about his newly acquired boyfriend, though it was no secret the man had been crazy over him for quite some time… He was just waiting until it was legal.
"We are talking about you, not me, don't change the subject."
Itachi nearly snapped, the embarrassment clear in his voice.
"Aww… Itachi is embarrassed that his friends know his sex life."
"Shut it Hidan, Pein and I are not in a sexual relationship!"
"So you're a virgin then? Ha! The Uchiha's a little prude too!"
"What about your boyfriend Hidan?" Itachi suddenly asked changing the subject.
"Kakuzu is still a fucker… as always…"
"That isn't nice to say about Kakuzu." Sasori reasoned, he rather liked Kauzu
"Kakuzu can go fuck himself!" Hidan mimicked Sasori's tone, but in a high pitched voice.
"I am sure Kakuzu has done more than just himself, Hidan."
"Fuck you Uchiha!!"
"Enough!! Why the hell did you three call me!?!" Sasori suddenly cut the conversation short. Getting quite pissed off.
"Cool it shortie!!" Hidan chuckled.
He always knew the right way to push Sasori's buttons… that was for sure.
"I'm not short!! I am the average height for a seventeen year old boy!! You're all just giants!!"
"Yeah, that's why you get mistaken for a fourteen year old every day of your fucking life!!"
"Umm… Sasori, I hate to break it to you, but you are sixty four inches… the average height for a teenage boy between ages sixteen and seventeen is about sixty-seven to seventy inches…"
"Heh! Poor little fucked up dwarf!!"
"Whatever!! Just tell me why you called!!"
"We wanted to know if you would grace us with your presence this New Year's Eve."
"No." Sasori didn't even have to think about that one.
"Ohh… Come on! Get the damn pole out of your ass! Kakuzu will be there, and I think Uchiha's lover boy will be too!!"
"Pein!" Itachi growled out.
"No thanks…"
"Has any ever noticed that Sasori is the only one without a…-"
"Fuck toy?"
"Significant other!"
"In other words fuck toy."
"Shut up Hidan!"
"So you're really ashamed to admit that you fuck men?"
"Shut the fuck up Hidan!"
"Wow, Uchiha has a temper!"
"Say one more word and your dick will be up your ass!"
"Feisty!"
"I'll be over there in five minutes, don't doubt me."
"What the hell did you guys want?" Sasori was almost pleading now.
"Please Sasori, just come with us tomorrow, to celebrate the New Year." Itachi said please… odd…
"But I don't want to go to a bar and get drunk." The redhead pouted.
"How about we go to a small café then?"
Itachi was always good a bartering.
"Sasori, We'll have three adults with us, what could happen?" Itachi reasoned
"You know what you need fucker, you really need to get your ass laid!"
"Okay fine, I'll do it."
"Get laid?" Hidan questioned.
"No! I'll go with you guys to a café just as long as they don't sell liquor."
"You have a pole shoved up your ass you know that?"
Before anyone could say anything else a door bell rung in the background.
"Hidan, open your door."
"Sure, ah - What the fuck Uchiha!?! Get aw-"
The line went dead.
Sasori sighed and hung up the phone, tomorrow was sure going to be fun…
-x-
"See Sasori! It is so much more fun to be with people!!"
Kakuzu, Hidan, who looked in pain, Itachi, and a very out of place Sasori were all sitting at two table that they pushed together, the redhead sitting at the end claiming that he wanted out as fast as possible.
"I hate New Year's." The artist grumbled with an annoyed look on his face.
"You have to admit this is better than being alone in your apartment." Pein offered, but Sasori just sneered.
"I don't get what's so great about watching you making googly eyes at Itachi and Hidan trying to get screwed by Kakuzu, who is as damn indifferent as ever!" The redhead half yelled, enough so several people looked over to where they were sitting.
Sasori and Hidan flipped them all off and they looked away, disgusted at the classless behavior.
Itachi snickered.
Pein looked bewildered.
Kakuzu was still indifferent.
"Well, maybe if you got a fu-"
"Significant other!"
"Fuck toy, you wouldn't be so damn depressed."
"Hidan," Itachi drawled dangerously, closing his eyes slowly and snapping his head to look at the albino, "We have had this conversation before, if you forget, it was the reason that I came to your door and beat you senseless the other day."
Everyone was staring at the two tables again.
Until the entrance door swung open and a hyper looking male with an orange mask bounced in, with a very strange looking man, who was half black and half white in tow, followed by a mature looking tall blonde haired man, with sparkling blue eyes, which were, at the moment, twitching.
"Tobi! If you don't slow the fuck down I am going to blow your fucking head off!"
Now everyone was looking at the blonde male who had just entered, following the tall teenager with an orange mask.
"Deidara-senpai you love Tobi too much to blow him up!"
"Love hurts."
"Both of you stop." It looked as if the black and white man was the referee, at least he matched the color scheme.
The three sat at a table right next to Sasori, who was on the far right of his and his friend's table. He watched the blonde male sit down next to him, since the tables were all close together, he wasn't even an arm's length away. The redhead quickly adverted his gaze, an action which did not go unnoticed by Hidan.
"Hey, did you just fucking look at someone!?" The amazement in his voice was inevitable.
The black and white man looked curiously at the albino. Hidan flipped him off.
The blonde named Deidara was trying to stifle his laughter.
The masked man named Tobi was just as clueless as he ever was.
"Am I not allowed to look at people now?" Sasori ground out in a whisper.
"That ain't it, but the fact that your whispering is." Hidan smirked.
"What does that have to do with anything?" Itachi asked leaning into the conversation, the blonde at the other table was interested too, though he kept his eyes fixed ahead of him.
"Remember when you liked that teacher, eh… what the fuck was his name?"
"Orochimaru." Itachi informed him, glancing at Sasori smirking.
"Yeah! That was the fucking weirdo's name. Anyway, when you liked him, you'd always look at him and avoid eye contact and shit like that."
"Plus, whenever you were around him you'd whisper." Itachi finished.
Kakuzu and Pein looked at Sasori with amused looks on their faces, as the redhead's cheeks started to turn from his creamy, smooth complexion into pink.
"That doesn't prove anything!" Sasori hissed, still whispering.
"Umm… Yeah, actually it fucking does." Hidan laughed.
"So what? I don't even know the guys name!?" He was still whispering.
Itachi smirked. He was sitting next to Sasori, who was sitting next to Deidara, it didn't look good for the poor redhead.
Hidan, who was sitting parallel to the redhead also smirked, the two obviously getting the same idea.
"That can be changed." Itachi said deviously.
"What?"
"Excuse me." Itachi said, sitting so that he was leaning over Sasori, his eyes directed to the blonde sitting next to the short seventeen year old.
The man obviously looked surprised that they approached him, though he knew what they wanted, since he listened to the entire conversation.
"Yes?" He answered.
"Could I get your name, please?" Itachi smiled sweetly, something that would make anyone melt, but the blonde man didn't seem phased.
"Deidara, could I ask yours?"
Itachi smirked.
"I am Itachi, this is Hidan, Kakuzu, Pein," He pointed to each as he went around the table and when he got to Sasori's name he put one hand on the redhead's shoulders, and the other he used to wrench his face up to make eye contact with Deidara, since he was currently watching his thumbs while he twiddled them. "And this is Sasori, he is a junior in Konoha high school and though his small size, he's actually seventeen years old."
Sasori glanced at Itachi, who smiled innocently at him.
"What about you?" The Uchiha continued.
'Damn he's good at this.' Sasori thought for a moment, no wonder he could get to anyone, he was damn persistent.
The blonde just laughed.
"I am a senior, majoring in art, though my main focus is sculpting."
Itachi smiled again.
"Which high school do you attend?"
The blonde, along with his two friends laughed.
Itachi exchanged curious glances at Sasori and Hidan, before focusing back on the laughing blonde.
"I'm in college." He chuckled out.
Itachi's jaw dropped, Hidan coughed, and Sasori adverted his gaze, blushing all the while.
"You look young for your age." Itachi said, regaining his calm demeanor quickly.
"So does your friend." He said, giving Sasori a once over.
The redhead blushed, but couldn't help asking.
"Y-you said t-that you were majoring in a-art?" Sasori stuttered out, in a whisper.
"Yes, I did why?" Deidara asked, looking genuinely confused.
Itachi and Hidan suddenly looked at each other smiling like fools.
"Sasori, Hidan, Kakuzu, Pein, and I are going to go get coffee, we'll get you some too, would you or your friend's like any Deidara?"
The blonde blinked, but then smiled.
"I'm fine," He looked at the two who he thought were sitting next to him, only to find them standing in the line. He rolled his eyes.
"I think they are too."
"Wait! Y-you don't need f-four people to go and get coffee!" Sasori spluttered out fast.
"Hmm? What was that? You know that I have trouble hearing."
"No you don't, you have trouble seeing." Pein chimed in.
Itachi's eye twitched
He turned and smiled, then turned back around and violently shoved the three of the much taller men out of the vicinity in record time, hissing at them as he went.
Deidara blinked a few times before looking at the redhead who had a blush still on his face and was sending a longing look toward the other three, who Itachi was currently yelling at in a hushed voice.
"Has he been your friend for a long time?"
Sasori looked over at the blonde, who looked a bit perturbed by the Uchiha who looked as if he were going to go on a killing spree.
"I've known him since elementary school, when I moved here."
"What about the other one?"
"Which one?"
"The albino."
Sasori laughed.
"I wouldn't call him that to his face, but I've known him since my first year in high school."
Deidara nodded.
"Who are the other two then?"
"Their boyfriend's."
"They're old."
"They both like slightly older men."
"Slightly."
"Well, Kakuzu is twenty-eight and Hidan is eighteen, Pein is thirty, and Itachi is also eighteen, so ten and twelve year differences."
Deidara nodded, obviously uncomfortable.
"So what were you saying about art?" The blonde asked, desperate to change the subject.
Sasori blinked then smiled.
Deidara scrutinized him, watching the minor as his face lit up, the blonde felt his stomach flip.
"Oh, I'm just majoring in art too, it's my favorite subject." Sasori explained, not noticing that the older artist was staring at him.
Hidan did and let out a loud whistle.
Itachi had to be held back by Pein and Kakuzu, Hidan laughed.
Sasori sighed, all of this was very normal, Hidan was always an antagonist and Itachi always had an incredibly short fuse, nothing ever really changed, except what Itachi was going to kill Hidan about.
The blonde artist looked over at Hidan in slight awe that he would do something like that.
"H-ha! Don't b-bother w-with us, just g-go b-back to your conver- Goddamnit Pein! Let go of me!!" Itachi ground out in a rage.
The redhead turned to Deidara and smiled warmly at him, trying to hide his embarrassment. That was another reason he didn't like to go out with his friends, they always started some kind of scene, whether it be Hidan annoying Itachi until he attacked him, one, both, or all of them getting drunk (something Sasori was not proud of), Itachi slapping someone who touched him, etc. It was all very nerve wracking to Sasori.
"Does this kind of thing always happen?"
"Only when Hidan pisses Itachi off… or vice versa…"
"Oh…" The blonde looked at a loss for words, Sasori didn't blame him.
"So what art interests you?" The redhead asked, not really knowing why the Hell he cared about keeping up a conversation with the very… very… good looking male sitting across from him.
Deidara smiled again, amused at this teenager's actions.
"My expertise is in sculpting and drawing. May I ask what you major in?" Deidara finished and smirked at the blush on Sasori's pale cheeks, liking the way it looked.
"I like to carve and paint." The redhead's shyness suddenly came back full fledged when he saw the blonde's devious smirk.
"What do you carve?"
"Mostly wood, I've worked with stone and other things, like ice and bone, but I don't enjoy them as much."
"I know something you may enjoy." The blonde's smirk was back.
Sasori gulped audibly, he was twiddling his fingers in a vain attempt to control his nervousness.
"W-w-hat?"
"I know a wonderful art museum that has many statues and paintings, how would you like to go sometime?"
The redhead exhaled a deep breath in relief. Thanking God that it wasn't what he thought in the first place, but at the same time, he was a tad bit upset that it wasn't…
Suddenly Zetsu and Tobi walked back over with three cups of coffee, shortly after, Itachi, Hidan, Kakuzu, and Pein came back over, Itachi carrying Sasori's. The redhead thanked Itachi, who gave him a look that said 'We'll talk every detail later.' Hidan giving him something similar.
All five of them, plus the three that they had become acquainted with, became engaged in a conversation, talking about anything and everything. Sometime, much passed midnight, they group finally shuffled out of the little shop, bidding each other farewell, Kakuzu and Hidan walked off, Pein kissed Itachi goodbye and hurried along, Zetsu and Tobi had also disappeared, the Uchiha, who had promised to give Sasori a ride home, since he cannot pass that damned driver's test, was going to go find his car since his memory was apparently leaving with his eyesight. Leaving Sasori and Deidara.
The blonde handed the younger one a piece of paper.
"You'll call me when you are ready to go to the art museum, won't you?" The larger male asked as he slipped the piece of paper into the redhead's hand.
Sasori could only nod.
Itachi pulled his car up, slightly hitting the curb with his tires, cursing as he did so. Sasori waved to the blonde, saying goodbye, before he was pulled by the arm back toward the blonde, who then placed a simple kiss on the young boy's cheek.
"Happy New Year." The older male said before letting go and walking off.
Sasori stood there for a moment, his hand brushing up against the spot where Deidara had placed a kiss, blushing as he did so, he ran into Itachi's car.
The Uchiha turned and looked at him very seriously, before noticing the folded paper in his hands. Slowly Itachi lifted his eyes to meet Sasori's.
"Spill."
-x-
Well, that was a request for blueball, it was really really bad in my opinion, I am not good at writing fluff at all, and I think it really shows…
Review anyway, I'd like to know what you think, constructive criticism is welcomed, and so are suggestions to help me with my tragic fluff dilemma…
