See It In a Boy's Eyes
By BeautifulStar24
Note: For all of you RFR fans, you all will soon know that RFR will be going off the air. The N has decided to cancel it and for that I am sad. Previously, in my other stories I have written about Alayna and Robbie, many of you honestly expressed yourselves and told me that I shouldn't write about Alayna's looks. The more I read the stories, the more I realized the focus wasn't on the story, about how pretty Alayna was and it wasn't cool at all. Well, in dedication of a great show being taken off the air and your comments, I've decided to give it a one shot deal and show a different side of Alayna and Robbie. I hope that you guys will enjoy it. Also, if you guys want me to write more about Robbie and Alayna, I will. If you interested in the past of Robbie and Alayna, just read, "Does He Love Me" and "What's a Girl to do". One love to you all.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the character, except for Alayna Maxwell. Degrassi and all of its characters are property of Epitome Pictures. Radio Free Roscoe and its characters are all property of Decode Pictures.
Lastly, the title of this song was taken from British RB artist Jamelia's song, "See It In a Boy's Eyes".
Lyrics to "See It In a Boy's Eyes"
When it rains, well it rains What's a girl like me to do
Oh my heart don't feel the same
Nothing change, nothing change
Come on rain I don't feel the same
With my foot to the floor
Hear my key turn in the door
Holding back what's in store
When a girl wants a little bit more
When she don't get a thing from you
I wanna go where you're going to
Have to do what you have to do
What's a girl supposed to try
When all you do is criticize
Pretty soon you'll realize
I can see it, I can see it in a boy's eyes
see it in a boy's, see it in a boy's eyes
Well it rains, when it rains What's a girl like me to do
Oh my heart don't feel the same
There's a sun in my sky
You don't see it, you don't even try
But you'll die, before you cry
Solitude is where you fly
You don't say this ain't right
But I see it in your eyes
What's a girl like me to do
When she don't get a thing from you
I wanna go where you're going to
Have to do what you have to do
What's a girl supposed to try
When all you do is criticize
Pretty soon you'll realize
I can see it, I can see it in a boy's eyes
see it in a boy's, see it in a boy's eyes
When she don't get a thing from you
I wanna know where you're going to
Have to do what you have to do
What's a girl supposed to say
Just turn around and walk away
Pretty soon you'll realize I can see it
I can see it in a boy's eyes
see it in a boy's, see it in a boy's eyes
As I sit on my bed and look out the window, it is raining. Seeing rain in Toronto, Canada isn't uncommon, but what is uncommon is that the weather is truly expressing my mood. Tonight was the last night that my best friend, Robbie McGrath and I would ever sit in my basement and watch a movie together. It would be the last night that I would see his smile and that we would joke around like old times. The words that came from his mouth a few weeks ago,
"Alayna, I'm moving to Vancouver to live with my dad", hit my brain as if he said it for the first time and the tears that I held in for so long, finally came out as I just stared out the window and watch the rain come pouring down.
My alarm clock goes off and it's 7a.m. in the morning, Robbie is about to go off to the airport in about a half an hour. So, I get up, take a quick shower, brush my teeth and throw on some clothes, I run outside of house and next to Robbie's house. I ring the doorbell and Robbie answers the door. He looks so good, but knowing that this is the last time that I'm going to see Robbie, brings tears to my eyes. Sensing this, Robbie puts his arms around me and hugs me. Then, we go inside his house and there on the couch, are Lily, Travis, Parker, and Ray. They too have all come to say good-bye to Robbie. As we sit on the couch and wait for Robbie's mom to come downstairs, we talk a little bit.
" You know, it really sucks that Roscoe is closing down. I thought that our school was good, but I guess it wasn't good enough to have government funding. That means that I'll have to go to Bardell next year", Ray says while shaking his head, " I'm really going to miss our school".
"Well, I'll be attending Degrassi", Lily says, " But at least I'll know one person there". She looks at me and we smile at each other.
" You guys are all lucky, at least you'll be going to public schools, unlike me, my father thinks that I'll be better off attending a private school in downtown", Travis says smugly.
" And I'll be going to Toronto School of the Arts", Parker says dryly.
"And me, I'll be all the way over in Vancouver, without my crew. At least you guys will be in the area with one another, me on the other hand, I'll have no one", Robbie says sadly.
Whatever good mood we were in, has now turned into a sad mood all over again and we sit there in silence. A minute later, Robbie's Mom, Ms. Terry comes downstairs and tells Robbie that they need to hurry up, because he doesn't want to be late for his flight. We all then get up, and walk outside to Robbie's mom car. Robbie then hugs Ray, Travis, Lily, and Parker. Lily wipes tears away from her eyes, then he comes over to me, and we hug each other for what seems like forever. Tears run down my eyes again and all that we had been through seemed irrelevant to me. Yes, it was true that we'd been best friends for six years, and for two months we dated, then broke up because he cheated on with Kim Carlisle, then when the shooting at Degrassi happened, Robbie was the first one there to make sure nothing happened to me. So now, even though we weren't together anymore, I felt like we had a stronger bond than before.
Robbie then slowly let go of our embrace. He wiped the tears off my eyes and whispered in my ear,
"Alayna, I have something to give you, but don't read it until after I leave". He then reached into his jacket pocket and handed me a note.
"Now, you promise you won't read it until after I leave right", he asked me again by whispering in my ear. I look at him and nod my head. A slight smile comes on his face and he kisses me on the face right near my lips. He then waves to the rest of the gang and says,
"I'll call all of you as soon as I get to my dad's house".
They all smile at him and then Ray yells,
"Yeah, don't forget, or I'll come over there and beat you up!"
We all laugh a little, and then Robbie gets in the car on the passenger, the car the pulls out the driveway and pulls off. I see Robbie turn around and wave to us one last time and for the first time, I actually see the sadness in his eyes. He tried to pretend for the longest time that he was happy about moving to Vancouver and be with his dad, but at this moment, as he is driving away from us, I see how truly sad he is. Before a tear rolls down his face, he turns away from us and then he is gone from us.
We all stand there for a minute in silence, it feels as though we've just lost one of our best friends and that a part of us is missing. And in a way, it's true, Robbie, the most sensitive guy of our group is now gone and it's as though his sincerity and genuine nature is gone, forever.
However, Ray breaks our moment of silence and says,
"Well, I don't know about you guys, but I'm going back home and going to bed. It's 7:30 and it's a Saturday morning. Robbie better be glad that I'm one of his best friends, because next to Grace, there's no one else I would wake up this early for."
We all shake our head and roll our eyes at Ray. Then we all go our separate ways and go back to our homes. Later on today though, since Lily will be new to Degrassi as of Monday, I wanted her to meet Darcy, and Chante, since she already knew Manny, Liberty, and Emma, so all of us were going to chill at the mall later. I also wanted her to meet Hazel and Paige, but Hazel was spending time with Jimmy and Paige's new boyfriend Matt was in town and they were hanging out together.
I went into my house and went up into my bedroom. I lie on my bed and open the letter that Robbie wrote me. It went like this:
Dearest Alayna:
It's the last night that I'll be sitting in my room at this house and as I write this letter to you a lot of things go through my mind. I remember it was back in 1999 and you were this shy little girl who was scared and timid, but I knew there was more to you than you put out there. So, once I got to know you, I realized that you were fun and goofy and I liked that about you. Actually Alayna, I liked you. You were just so nice and pretty, that I didn't know how to even tell you. But now, I guess it's as good of a time as any to tell you how I really feel about you. First, I want to thank you for the times you stood by my side. I want to thank you for being a listening ear to me, especially when I broke up with Kim. I honestly thought Kim was everything I wanted in a girlfriend and she wasn't. I am truly and sincerely sorry for everything I put you through. I want to thank you for taking me back as a friend, even when I cheated on you with Kim. It takes a strong person to do that and I am so thankful to have a friend like you.
But now, here comes the hard part, and as I write this tears come to eyes. When the shooting at Degrassi last year, the first thing that came to my mind was that you had been shot. The things that went through my mind was that I regretted everything I did to you a month before, especially sleeping with Kim. The thought of you not being around anymore made my heart break in two, but finding out that you were alive and well, made me so happy. It gave me a chance to reconcile the friendship that we once had. I wanted us to become boyfriend and girlfriend again, but when I wanted to start our relationship over again, I found out that Roscoe was closing down, my mom was getting remarried to a guy that I don't like, made any chance for us to have a relationship impossible, because I was moving to Vancouver to live with my dad.
Alayna, what I'm trying to say is that you'll always have my heart and just know that the feelings that I have for you are strong and that if I was still in Toronto, I'd try really hard at making our relationship work. You're everything that I wanted in woman: you're beautiful both inside and out, sincere, sweet, independent, intelligent, fun, and yet, you've sensitive at the same time. You will always be my best friend and if I didn't tell you this, just know that I love you; I always have and always will. So, farewell my lovely Alayna and just know that whenever you need me, just call me, write me, or IM me and I'll be there.
Love Always,
Your Best friend,
Robbie
After reading that letter, I cried until I cried myself to sleep and held the letter close to my heart. Just knowing that Robbie felt the same way about me that I did about him, made me feel good and sad at the same time. Sad, knowing that the possible chance of Robbie and I getting back together wasn't going to happen any time soon and good, because I now know that Robbie really did care about me after all this time.
The next thing I knew, Lily, Emma, and Liberty were standing over me. Lily was waving a hand in front of my face and saying,
"Hello, earth to Alayna, time to get up".
I groggily sat up on my bed and said,
"Hmm, what time is it and who let y'all in my bedroom?"
Emma then said,
" Your step mom told us to come upstairs and wake you up".
Liberty then said,
" She told us it made no sense for you to be in bed this late."
Manny then sassily replied,
"It's also time for you to get up and change your clothes, because I know that you're not going to the mall with us in that outfit. Plus, you need to hurry up, it's now 2 and Urban Outfitters is having this great sale and we want to look great for our 11th grade year. C'mon girl, let's go!"
" Just to let you know Manny, I'm going to let that comment go about my outfit and secondly, Urban Outfitters is okay, but that new store Dynamite is the place that we need to hope is having the good sale", I told her then I playfully pushed Manny on her shoulder, changed out of my sweat suit into a pair of jeans, a cute shirt, and boots and then we were out. Then about an hour later, we met Darcy and Chante at the mall and we went shopping.
However, once we took a break at the food court, I sat down and Lily sat with me after we got our food, while we waited for everyone else to get their food.
" Alayna, is everything okay, I've noticed that you've been kind of down all day", Lily asked me while taking a sip of her coke.
I sighed and said,
" Yeah, I am. I'm just sad that Robbie is gone."
Lily then said,
"Yeah, me too", the she placed a hand on my shoulder, " But don't worry, everything will be fine. At least we'll be going to the same school this year and it finally gives me a chance to see more of the world of Alayna Maxwell and hopefully, meet some new guys too".
Manny then sat down holding a tray of food and said,
"Lily honey, please don't hold your breath. Degrassi guys aren't even worth it, Alayna can tell you that".
Lily gave me a wearisome look and I nodded my head.
"Honey, you're better off just chilling with Ray, Travis, and River, because Degrassi boys really aren't worth the time of day", I told her.
"Oh great, so now where I am going to meet some cool guys", Lily said wearily.
"Trust me, we'll find some later on this year, but for right now, just stay focused on school, your band and having fun, because this year, I definitely am", I told her, "Plus, you're chilling with us and you'll be fine".
We then smiled at each other and had fun for the rest of the day.
Now, its October17, 2005 and Robbie's been gone for almost two months. We talk on IM everyday and call each other the weekends. He seems to be doing well, but he constantly tells me that he misses Roscoe, Toronto, Lily, Ray, Travis, Parker, and me. When I ask him whether or not he misses Kim, he tells me that she crosses his mind every now and then, but he believes it was better for them to break up. I let him know that Lily and I have become closer ever since she's been going to Degrassi and that once a week, Travis, Ray, Parker, and I meet at Mickey's to catch up on each other. I really miss him. I miss seeing him next door everyday after school, I miss chilling with him on Friday nights when we were bored and since today is my sixteenth birthday, I especially miss it when we hung out in Downtown Toronto for my birthday last year.
It's 3:30 p.m. on a Friday afternoon and I'm in Spirit Squad practice. While I should be happy that my mom, who's flying all the way from New York and my dad are throwing me a sweet sixteen party and most of my friends and family are going to be there, but I only wanted one thing for my birthday and that was Robbie.
After Spirit Squad practice, Manny, Chante, Darcy, and I met up with Emma, Liberty and Lily who were all outside sitting on the school's steps. So far, Lily is enjoying Degrassi, but I know that she misses Roscoe, however she tells me that Degrassi is more laid back that Roscoe and she likes it. She told me that even though Principal Waller was a tyrant and Cougar Radio sucked, she told me that she still had a lot of fun at Roscoe. However, it's been cool, because her and Parker's band, No Man's Land and Degrassi's own, Downtown Sasquatch with two new replacement members for Jimmy and Spinner, have played together at different clubs in Toronto. It's great to see them working together. Lily has also made friends with Craig, Ellie, Alex, Hazel, Paige, Jimmy, Marco, JT, and Toby as well. Also, what's really funny is that Toby now has a crush on her. Believe me, Toby has a crush on any pretty girl that he sees. It's really cool having her at Degrassi and making new friends, but she tells me that she feels so bad for Jimmy, because he's in a wheelchair. I told her that I did too, but not to feel too bad for him, because after all, Jimmy is still living and doing great in his senior year.
Just before we are about to leave Degrassi, my cell phone rings.
"Hello", I answer.
"Alayna, turn around", a familiar voice says.
I turn around and there is none other than my best friend, my buddy, my Robbie! I run towards him and jump in his arms. We hug each other for a very long time, and then he let go of me with his hands on my waist, while my arms were around his neck and I just smiled at him. He had grown about a few more inches since I've seen him and his hair was cut, but he looked so good.
" Punk, why didn't you tell me that you were coming here", I said excitedly, while letting go of him and pushing his shoulder.
"I wanted to surprise you on your birthday! Plus there is something else that I have to tell you, but I'd like to tell you alone, want to go to a ride and go to the park", he asked.
My initial answer would have been yes, but I couldn't just leave my friends, we'd made plans earlier to go to The Dot grill and I like to be a person of my word, when I like to do what I say I'm going to do. Then Lily walked over to me, placed a hand on my shoulder and said,
"Look Alayna, just go with Robbie, he's been talking all week about how he wanted to see you and all, plus, you, Ray, Travis, Parker, Robbie, and I are all going to hang out at Mickey's tonight. Plus, we'll always have time to hang out with the rest of the gang, but I think you're going to like what Robbie has to say".
"So you mean to tell me that you knew all along that Robbie was coming today", I asked her.
Lily nodded her head and then said,
"The reason I didn't want to tell you, is because Robbie told me to keep it a secret."
Lily and I smiled at each other, and then I told the girls that I would see them later, I got in the car with Robbie and we caught up on each other. He told me that Vancouver was really chill and laid-back, but he really did miss Toronto. Finally, we arrived at Centennial Park, and we sat on a bench that overlooked Lake Ontario. It was sunny outside and surprisingly warm for a day in October and especially in Toronto. It was absolutely gorgeous outside. So, while I sat there in my Spirit Squad uniform and my hair in a ponytail and he was wearing a pair of khakis, a leather jacket and a white t-shirt, I felt like we were a typical high school couple sitting in the park and just chillin.
While we talked, Robbie then took my hand into his and said,
"Alayna, there is something I need to tell you".
I turned to him and then he said,
"Alayna, in that letter that I wrote you, I meant every word that I said".
I touched the side of his face and said,
" I know Robbie, I know you did".
"You remember the part when I wrote that if I still was in Toronto, I would want to get back in a relationship with you", he asked me while looking deep into my eyes.
"Yeah", I replied.
"Well, Alayna, my wish may come true. When I moved to Vancouver, my dad was in the process of looking for a job in Toronto, he told me that he knew that I missed living in Toronto and being around my friends, so he looked for a job in Toronto, because he knew that the transition would be hard for me. He told me that once I finished high school, he would move back to Vancouver and I would be free to do whatever I wanted to, but he would support me either way. A few weeks ago, my dad told me that he'd just been offered a really good position at a marketing firm in Toronto, so that means that we'll be moving back to Toronto in two weeks and even though Roscoe in now closed, I'll be going to Bardell with Ray".
I felt so ecstatic, that I felt like doing back flips right then and there, but I kept my cool.
"So, my question for you Alayna is that when I move back to Toronto, would you be my girl", he asked me.
It's funny, because my first answer would have been yes, but considering that he cheated on me with Kim Carlisle has never left my mind. Robbie was a great friend and a good boyfriend, but I needed to know that he would be faithful to me and not cheat on me again.
"Robbie, I would really like to be your girlfriend again, but there are a few things on my mind and one of them is Kim Carlisle. Even though you say that you're over her, I don't know if I can believe you. You said that last year, but look what happened and don't say to me that she's selfish, shallow, and arrogant, because you said all of those things to me last time and you still winded up back with her. Also, don't tell me that the second time y'all broke up is because you felt too intimidated by River Pierce and her dad, because I remember that she came running to you crying that she felt pressure from them and you gave into her, so Robbie, if we're going to be together, let's do this the right way. I don't have time for games anymore and further more, if you want to know whether or not I still think about Carmine, I do, every now and then, and yes, I still do care about him, but do I love him, no, I really love you Robbie, but I can't afford for my heart to be broken again", I said to him and it felt good.
"Alayna, I'm not going to lie to you. Kim will always have a piece of my heart, because she was my first love. But you Alayna, you have my heart know. When I was over in Vancouver, all I could think about was you. Your smile, the way you laughed, the way you cried when Rick and Jimmy were shot at Degrassi last year, the way you comforted me whenever I had a bad time, and need I say that when you're sleep while we're watching a really bad movie, you look like a sleeping beauty. Plus, we have a lot more in common that Kim and I did. So, what do you say, will you give us a second chance", Robbie asked me.
I smiled at him and said,
"Well, let's just take things slowly, get to know each other all over again. Also, I don't want to give us the title, let's just be exclusive, because being labeled as boyfriend and girlfriend just sounds too conformist".
Robbie then smiled and at me and said,
"I can see that you're a girl after my own heart already".
Then he took me in his arms, we just looked into one another's eyes and then, it happened, we kissed. It was a nice, long, passionate kiss. It was as though everything that we were holding on the inside, finally emerged and it was great.
After we kissed, Robbie and I then got up from the bench, because I told him that I needed to go home and change before we went to Mickey's to hang out with the rest of the crew.
As we walked to his car hand in hand, Robbie said to me,
"Alayna, after that kiss and all that we've been through, if I ever say that you're too perfect for me and there's not enough passion in our relationship, you have all the permission in the world to beat me up".
I laughed and said,
"Don't worry Robbie, you know that I'm more than capable of doing it".
Then we laughed and before he let me in the car, he took me in his arms again and kissed me.
After our kiss, we held each other once more and all I could think to myself was,
"Thank God, you've answered my prayers, thank you for the most precious gift I could have ever received on my birthday, and that was my best friend and my man back".
The End
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