Hikari-Aoi: Hello! This was made through sheer stupidity on my little brother's part.
Naruto-fan76: Hey!
Disclaimer: I no own.
Edward was bored because he couldn't go to the carnival, being the short little alchemis that he is, so he decided to go drink until he passed out. But as soon as he got to the kitchen, he found Roy and Riza singing a Britney Spears song.
'Just don't ask. Just don't ask.' thought Edward as he inched out of the kitchen.
Thankfully they didn't notice him. He just slowly walked out of his house not believing what he just heard, but then he thought one thing. Blackmail!
The next, day after Ed had gotten completely drunk the night before ( bad minor!), he decided that he would go to the office, and ask Roy and Riza what they were doing yesterday afternoon.
Ed found Roy in his office burning all his paperwork.
"So exactly why were you and Riza singing in my kitchen yesterday?" asked Ed.
Roy didn't say anything, but after a few seconds Ed noticed Roy's desk go up in flames.
"I-I-I
don't know what you're talking about." stammered Roy.
"Well,
I might've had a little too much coffee."
"What was Riza doing there?"
"Coffee."
Ed then took Roy's coffee cup and threw it out the window. There was a loud shatter, and someone screaming for an ambulance. Ed sweat dropped as he heard the ambulance.
"Whoops."
There was then a scream from below, "He's dead!"
"And you thought the coffee was bad," smirked Roy
"Shut up, Roy," replied Ed, as for the second time he inched out the door.
Ed decided he would just question Riza, and put the whole coffee cup incident behind him. Needless to say, as soon as the teen left Roy's office, everybody including Riza Hawkeye, wanted to know why Roy's coffee cup had killed a man. Plus, he heard Riza say she was gonna shoot Roy into a bloody pulp.
Nervous, the alchemist went running home as fast as he could, before Riza found out it was him. Of course she was gonna hunt him down anyway, so he might as well enjoy his last moments alive. But before he even got home he was being shot at.
"DANG IT ROY!" he screamed, arms flailing.
'Why did you tell her so quickly? You didn't even give me enough time to get half way home!' he thought.
Right as Ed finished this thought Roy came running up beside him.
"Why are you here?" asked Edward.
"Riza just assumed we had done it, and started shooting," Roy replied hurriedly. "So just run like the wind, Shorty."
Roy shot ahead as Ed yelled at him.
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SHORT! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" shouted Ed as he put on a extra burst of speed so he could catch up to and kill Roy.
It's a good thing Ed put on that extra burst of speed because right as he sped up Riza came riding up on a motorcycle in to the area where the teen had been standing a moment before, and she was ready to blow his head off.
Ed should be thankful for being short that day because he ran out of breath quickly, and decided to jump behind some garbage cans and wait for Riza to pass. Luckily, she didn't notice him, and went speeding right past. Ed decided he would take the back allies home, and wait for this entire thing to blow over.
It took him a lot longer then usual but he got home only to find Roy hiding behind the couch.
"What the hell are you doing here!" exclaimed the surprised Edward.
"I couldn't think of anywhere else to run," said Roy.
"Whatever, just turn on the news," he replied, exhausted.
When they turned on the news it read the headline:
Local millionaire dies by coffee cup
Ed and Roy looked at the headline, and they kind of looked like this: o.0
Slowly, Mustang reached for the remote and turned off the T.V.
"Let's agree to never talk about this again," the blond boy said thoughtfully, blinking.
"Agreed."
Ed sent Roy off at about midnight when they were sure Riza was gone. He actually saw Riza a little ways off, but he didn't say anything to Roy because he still wanted to get back at the man for calling him short. As soon as the alchemist closed the door, he heard the colonel scream as he went running down the street dodging Hawkeye's bullets. Laughing hysterically for ten minutes, he decided to go to bed.
Author Babble:
Naruto-fan76: Heh. There's another part to this.
Hikari-Aoi: Yeah, goody goody gumdrops. More for me to edit.
Naruto-fan76: Duh.
Hikari-Aoi: Shut up. Review!
