Nobody Said it was Fair

Present day

The feeling of nostalgia drenching Sesshoumaru while driving on to the endless road that is before him. Dark curly locks flowing with the wind while red fiery eyes accented by the sunset in his mind. Those red lips he long for; that face he wishes to see one last time. He scarcely fathoms the idea that she will soon only exist in his memories.

It's not that he didn't know himself. It's not that he didn't know that he has a cold heart or the fact that he had broken many hearts in past, although he would never admit it out loud. It's just the way he is. He didn't believe in love or relationships. He preferred being alone. A woman's company from time to time but forever wasn't in the picture. He lived by this motto up until he met the woman plaguing his thoughts: Kagura Kagewaki. She, of course was a full youkai like him with a fiery personality just like her eyes that burned red. She carries herself with class and pride, she stand tall even though she has no freedom of her own. She spoke with a smooth seductive tone but often times dripping with sarcasm. He smiled ever so lightly thinking about her. He wanted her.

Maybe it is the fact that she is involve with a notorious syndicate that she didn't want to be with him. Maybe it was the fact that someone else holds her own life that she chooses not to be with him for his own safety or maybe she didn't want to be with him after all. Maybe Sesshoumaru finally had a taste of his own medicine. He had numerous lovers all whose feelings were sadly not returned but he'd always get away with it. He simply banished them or ignored their feelings and for the first time he is heartbroken he is infuriated; although he does not regret any of his past lovers and the way he treated them, he simply didn't care. He is mad because of the way he let himself fall for a woman. He is mad he can't banish the feelings he has for her. He hated the fact that he couldn't get her out of his mind. He simply didn't want to deal with it but he can't shake it off.

"One more mile till the road runs out"He thought to himself rolling the windows down. The ocean always soothes his mind. The breeze and the sound of the waves slapping against the shore helps him relax but for some reason he has a feeling that even the ocean won't do any help. He can't get Kagura off his mind. "Does she even think about me?" he sighed. "Pathetic…"

He pulled over on the side by the dunes and noticed that he had the beach all to himself. "Good. I like the solitude." He silently thought. After a moment of walking across the dunes he sighed to himself. The view was truly refreshing but it didn't get Kagura off his mind. He brushed off some sand that had managed to get stuck on his black suit. "Black" he noticed. Black is the color of remorse. Black reminds him of funerals, of death. It seems befitting that he wears black in a situation such as now. He might as well be in a funeral. He feels like a ghost walking around not that it differs from his natural unemotional state. It just seems colder and darker than usual.

Sesshoumaru kicked off his shoes, took off his black suit leaving him with his socks on, white shirt and his black pants. He stood near the shore his hair dancing with the wind. He looked towards the setting sun and without another second passed he jumped into the ocean drenching himself with the icy ocean water. He held his breath while he swam far hoping the thoughts of her would be washed away but it was no good. She plagued his mind with a large swarm of nostalgia and emotions ready to eat his heart and soul. He didn't know what else to do but swim some more.

To be continued...