( the title has nothing to do w/ the episode of that title lol fyi)
so I'm distraught over the fact m&s aren't living together so here have another fic about the circumstances of msr in the beginning of the revival.
I might write a second chapter hm. should I?
He had her.
He lost her.
He missed her.
Oh how Mulder's obsession with the alien conspiracy had costed him so dearly. It had costed him the one person who had unconditionally loved him and stayed with him throughout almost twenty years.
The obsession had pulled him in far too deep and there was no way to get out. He had stopped grooming himself, stopped sleeping, nearly stopped eating- he'd fallen apart and had lost everything.
All of this for a conspiracy he had started to wonder was all in his head. All for nothing. But he couldn't stop himself.
It had been her or his obsession. He couldn't choose. So Scully did for him. She left him.
Scully had left their little house for an apartment near the hospital she worked at. She had said she needed to get away from the house, away from his obsession- and most of all away from him.
She said it would be temporary. That she just needed some space.
That had been months ago. Not so temporary after all.
" I just need more time." Had been what she said every time Mulder would ask her when she'd come home.
Eventually he just stopped asking. And eventually she stopped picking up his calls. It had been weeks since he last talked to her.
The house felt so empty and lifeless without Scully. He felt more alone than he ever had in his whole life.
Mulder couldn't stand to sleep in their bed alone. It reminded him of her. It reminded him of all the times they slept together in that bed, all the times he'd wake up with her curled up against him; the morning light from the window lighting up her face and her crimson hair. It hurt too much to remember that. So he slept on their- no his- living room couch, surrounded by the clutter and darkness of his obsession.
The same darkness that drove Scully away.
The same darkness that was now eating away at him.
He was nothing without her, nothing at all. Each day without her ate even more at his heart. Despite this, Mulder had given up trying to get her back. Everyday she drifted farther and farther from his reach, invulnerable to his pleads and cries to come back home.
He had her.
He lost her.
He missed her.
And most of all, he wanted her home. But he didn't know how to get her back.
But he knew he wanted her home again.
