He'd Never Know

Marauders Era Characters Competition – Rabastan Lestrange

Words: 538

Prompts: seeing red

Rabastan Lestrange wasn't a normal Death Eater.

No, he wasn't. Because, last time anyone anywhere checked, Death Eaters did not fall in love. Ever. They felt hatred, anger, disgust at others, but never love.

Yet he did, He fell in love – with a Gryffindor no less. And to top it all off, she was a mudblood. Now, he knew very well what would happen if anyone where to figure it out, so he kept it all under wraps. But it hurt him, it hurt him so bad to see the pain in her eyes every time he saw his older brother and his comrades insult her, discriminate her because of her blood.

He'd be a hypocrite if he said he didn't do the same, but he always apologised. Every single time. He knew, deep down, that two words, those two words he repeated constantly but with complete honesty and sincerity would come back to haunt him, to lead him to his horrific death.

It was routinely; he'd trail behind the 'bosses', throw a few mudblood comments and so, and strut off, leaving a crying victim. Minutes later, he'd return and apologize sincerely but quickly, in fear of being caught. He'd run off and she'd always wonder why.

There were times they were forcibly paired together, his brother and Lily. Rodolphus never cared for school, but she did, so Rabastan did his brother's half of the work. He did his best to remain distant from her, but, occasionally, she broke through his defences and managed to make him laugh and smile, to make him fall for her.

It went on like that for a few years, until her seventh year came by. It was Lily's last, but he still had another two years left. She was Head Girl, along with that James Potter – the boy who fawned over his Lily. Over the years, Rabastan had watched James present Lily with flowers and ask her out endlessly, jealousy burning within him, although it decreased every time she refused his advances.

He had though Lily never wanted James, so when news got to him that those two were going out together, he didn't know what to do. His training hadn't helped him, his parents; his superiors hadn't shown him how to react when this happened. Of course they wouldn't, they never fell in love.

So he did the next best thing, he ignored her. There was the occasional class she'd try and speak with him. Rabastan knew it hurt her, first Snape, now him. But he didn't care – she hurt him more. Anyways, they weren't close at all, so why did she care?

It was, to him, perfectly logical. She had a boyfriend, so why was he there at all. But there are always two – or more – sides to every story. And Lily's wasn't exactly happy.

It hurt her, and, as unconventional as it seemed, she had actually fallen for him. Of course, in time, she'd learnt to love James, but not as she did Rabastan. He'd never know he was her last thought that fateful Halloween. He'd never know he threw away happiness because of a psychopath and his crazy minions, because of his jealousy and selfishness.

He'd never know.

Hey, my prompt was 'seeing red', not 'being angry'... I simply twisted your words. :

Admittedly, not very emotional, I suppose. If you could spare the time to read my other stories and one-shots?

I'd appreciate it.