"Sophie, would you be a dear, and run this message over to Henry please?"
Charlotte sat in her desk, writing out papers that she had to fill out. She handed Sophie a small slip of paper and smiled at her tiredly. "I'm sorry for all the errands I had you do for me, my girl. You must be very tired."
She shook her head and took the note from her fingers. "Not at all Mrs. Branwell, I shall deliver this to Henry quickly." Sophie curtsied politely as she closed the heavy mahogany doors of Charlotte's study, and walked briskly down the hall to Henry's study.
With a half melted candle in her hand, she walked alone in silence. French windows let the melancholy moonlight seep into the narrow corridor, accompanied by a cool breeze that made the hairs at the back of Sophie's neck stand up. It was a quarter to eight, and dinner was still to be served. She passed the kitchen where she smelled freshly baked dinner rolls and soup in the air. Her stomach growled in protest as she drifted far from the scent. It was a very long day; her mistress was cooped up all day in her room filling out papers in terms of Mortmain. Training was very back breaking, considering the fact that they needed to quicken their training, since Mortmain and his clockwork machines could jump in, and call a fight any second. And throughout the entire day, almost nobody in the institute talked at all. Everyone was quiet. No guests walked in, nobody walked out.
All the chaos was already in the institute itself. Jem's vitals were deteriorating day by day with little hope. Mortmain was hot on their heels, and Will's sister-Cecily- just recently arrived. Even Will himself wasn't his witty self today. Sophie was beginning to notice heavy circles forming under his eyes from lack of sleep, and he wasn't talking as much. And this was about four days ago after Jem and Tessa's announced engagement, and after he told everyone about his uplifted 'curse'. Sophie was shocked to learn that there was an actual reasoning behind his rude remarks and such. The remorse and pity she felt inside her when he started to pour his heart out. From that day on, she paid him full respect. How could anyone endure such a long period of time pushing their loved ones away?
It only took a few days to really realize that he wasn't as happy as he should be, given that his supposed curse was lifted. Sophie began to catch him staring at Tessa in long periods of time, the loneliness in his eyes whenever Jem and Tessa showed their affection towards one another. It was not only Jem who pictured him and Tessa forever in love and married, it was also Will.
Sophie paid attention to Will more often, but didn't say anything to him. He needed space and needed time to mend. Her thoughts snapped when a door creaked open in front of her. A wisp of sandy blonde hair came into view as Sophie froze. Gideon stepped out and stopped momentarily to recognize that Sophie was standing in front of him. His eyes widened.
"Oh, good evening Sophie."Gideon greeted, she ignored the use of her first name.
"As do you Mr. Lightwood." She curtsied and made her way around him. The beating of her heart slowed as she moved farther away from him. Sophie let out a sigh. She was always like this when she was in the presence of Gideon. Times like these reminded her that she could not accommodate herself to someone of a higher class, even if it was someone that she truly admired.
She came across Henry's room and gave him the note. Sophie scurried over to the kitchen to start helping Bridget set the table. She called the others to the table. Jem was unable to come because he was resting, so Sophie had to deliver his dinner to him after everyone was settled. Tessa, Charlotte, Cecily and Henry came to the table, but Will.
"Where is Will?" Charlotte asked. "Is he in the library Tessa?"
Tessa looked at her with wary eyes. "I didn't see him." She said quietly as she sat herself down, but then hesitated. "I shall fetch him from his room-"
"No, no" Sophie waved her hands. "I will fetch Mr. Herondale. You stay here Miss Tessa." She picked up her skirts and walked upstairs, while everyone ate without her.
The hallways were dark again, and Sophie had to depend on the moonlight to light her way to his room. The floor creaked eerily as she walked when she came across his room. The door was slightly opened. Sophie raised her hand to knock softly on the door, when she was stopped by a low sniffling sound. It was so quiet that it was barely audible to the ear. She peeked through the small opening and saw Will sitting on the corner of his bed facing the window, running his hand repeatedly through his hair in frustration. The small pang of pity rose in Sophie's heart again, and she was reminded again of Will's unrequited love for Tessa and his sacrifices.
She took a small breath and knocked softly on the door. "Master Will?" She asked with quiet voice. "It is Sophie."
Moments passed by. "Come in." He said in a monotone voice.
Sophie stepped into the room. He didn't move, he just sat with his head down. "It is dinner time, I hope you're hungry."
"I am not hungry at the moment, Sophie. You can just bring the food up to my room when you are finished." He replied with a weak voice.
"Are you well Master Will? You sound sickly."
Will gave a muffled laugh. "I sound sickly? Haven't you heard Jem today?"
Sophie cleared her throat. "So I take it that you are alright." She took a step backwards. "I shall leave you to your own devices now."
Before she could reach for the door knob, Will turned around. "Does it bother you?" He said quietly.
She stopped and turned around in confusion. His blue eyes were burning as if he had been crying. "Pardon?"
He turned to face her fully now. His hair was tousled widely, his face was pale as Jem's and his eyes were a deep shade of blue, like the bottom of the ocean. "Does it bother you that Mr. Lightwood-Gideon- is a shadowhunter, and you are a maid?"
She felt her heart turn to stone and drop down to her stomach. A cold feeling came over her. "I'm sorry, I do not understand Master Will."
"But I can see it whenever you look at him, Sophie. I know what you are feeling." Will said softly. "I do not mean any disrespect, but I just feel inclined to know. Does it bother you?"
"I-"She swallowed. She thought of Gideon, what her feelings and what her true intentions were. She did not want to think of Gideon right now, but she also felt inclined that she owed Will an answer. "It does bother me. But what my feelings are, and how strong they are for him right now, I already know what it best for him, what will make him have a good life. And that alone will make me happy."
"But how do you suppress your feelings Sophie?" He said in almost a pleading manner. "Does it not kill you everyday to know that his life may continue without you?" Will's eyes were shimmering.
In a second, she realized what this was all about. She closed the door and sat beside him. "I am just happy to a part of it. He may not have feelings for me at all, but I will stay by his side and I shall support him, as a friend."
He nodded solemnly. Will pinched the bridge of his nose; she could see the dark circles under his eyes. "Master Will, may I ask why you are asking me this?"
"Reasons that I do not feel inclined to tell right now."
"May I guess that it is because of Tessa?"
He looked at her with startled eyes. "What makes you say that?"
Sophie stared at his copy of The Tale of the Two Cities on his desk with half a dozen dog eared bookmarks folded in. "I can see the loneliness and the longing in your eyes when you see her." She said faintly. "I see it every day."
He paused for a moment. "So you have." He smiled weakly as he put his head in his hands. "A wishful stable boy gazing longingly at the Princess in the gardens, a storyteller might say."
"Did you tell her how you feel?" She asked, looking at him in contempt.
"Yes" He croaked. "I poured my soul out to her. I told her that she was the reason that motivated me to find the demon. I told her the words of my heart, the passion in my soul…and then she told me-"
"She was engaged to Jem." Sophie slowly finished. Will quietly nodded and closed his eyes.
"How could I be so foolish to believe that she loved me in return? After all that time I avoided her, how could I not have known that she built up a strong relationship with Jem?" He said, his voice coated in great sadness. "Now she is far beyond my reach even if she could be standing right in front of me."
"You will learn to let go." Sophie responded with great carefulness. "Time will heal, you will be happy again. She may not be able to love you back as the way you love her, but what I do know that it has affected Miss. Tessa greatly. Be there by her side and live to let her shine."
" How can I let go?" he said in exasperation, looking at her as if she just slapped him across the face. "My passion for her is too much to contain within myself. And I know that she will move on without me, without my support, and she will forget what I feel!"
The sadness in his eyes was so moving that Sophie's vision was getting blurry with tears. She knew what he felt, and he knew as well. "I know who you feel." She replied gently. "But we must be strong with ourselves first before we can be strong for others. Tessa is greatly saddened that she hurt you, that I know Will."
He didn't speak for a moment. "This passion inside me." He pointed to his heart. "Is making me think of unthinkable things. Do you know that there are times when I dream of yanking Tessa away from Jem so she could be all mine? Do you know that sometimes I wonder if Jem died, then Tessa would be all mine? Even if Jem died, I still would not have Tessa. It would be like I was winning some sort of crude victory. This is a new curse on me Sophie, one that I can never get rid of."
Sophie did not know what else to say to him. Instead, she put her hand on top of his, squeezed it, and gave a sympathetic smile. "I do not know what to say to you that will make you feel better. Perhaps you just need some space. But what I do know is, you need a friend. It is time for you lean on someone else." With that, she bravely pulled him in an awkward hug. Will froze for a moment before wrapping his arms around his waist tightly and burying his face in her neck, a rack of sobs came up within him as she held him while he wept.
"I am sorry for saying all those rude comments about you in the past, but now I know what you truly feel, and I respect you. I will be here if ever you need me." Sophie said. "If you be strong for yourself and for her, I will do the same for him as well."
"Thank you." Will whispered. "And I am sorry for hurting you for all these years."
"I know what your intentions were. It is alright." She smiled as she continued to hold him.
After a couple of minutes, Will stopped crying, but he still held onto Sophie. Then suddenly a loud grumble from her stomach erupted. She furrowed her eyebrows as Will released her. Despite everything, he slightly chuckled. "Hungry?"
She sighed. "Yes."
"Go on then, don't let me keep you." He gestured to the door. Sophie began to protest, but he didn't want to hear it.
"Then I shall bring your dinner up in a short while. Try to get a bit of rest while I get it for you." She said. She curtsied as she walked out of his room.
"Oh, and Sophie? One more thing."
Sophie spun around to face him. His face was blotchy with tears, and his pale skin had a red tint.
"Thank you, for listening."
She smiled at him. "anytime."
Wow, I have not written anything in this fandom in a while. Clockwork Princess must have paralyzed my idea generator in my brain. Well, I hope you enjoyed it, (btw, I don't ship these two romantically, I ship these two friendtically) XD
So, anyone seen The City of Bones movie? I'm in love with their soundtrack right now.
