If there was an award for picking the weirdest bed partners, Zexion would have awarded himself it. The slate haired man was, in himself, quite normal. He was a human who enjoyed reading, drinking hot chocolate, detective films and his job at The Office of Supernatural Creature Control. The only problem was, he ended up meeting most of his lovers in said establishment. And most were the visitors, rather than the staff.
Zexion's first non-human lover had been possibly the worst to start with. Larxene was never nice at the best of times, but was even worse when she grew wings, turned scaly and started to set his Sherlock Holmes collection alight. He'd never dated a dragon since.
The list went on, some relationships being generally alright, such as his time with fallen angel Roxas, who broke it off for the simple reason there was someone else he found more attractive. Obviously opposites attract or something, as the poor slate haired man had been forced to tell Roxas and his fire demon lover – Axel – to stop trying to undress each other in the main reception area. Then there were ones which were truly disastrous. Zexion had made it his personal mission to tell everyone that Marluxia the fairy was, in no way, shape or form, a good boyfriend and to steer well clear of the narcissist.
Finally, having broken it off with Riku the vampire (who left Zexion wondering often where Riku drew the line between lovers and lunch), the twenty six year old decided that he would no longer date supernaturals. There were far too many variables involved, and if he was honest, half the time it was much more work than necessary. He didn't care that most of the staff could hold a relationship with a non-human down just fine, he wanted a nice, normal partner who'd be happy to spend quiet time together, drink hot chocolate with each other, and you'd be able to have some fun without wondering if they'd damaged something or someone again.
So why he was even trying to consider Demyx's invitation out for dinner was beyond him.
Zexion sighed as he set his cup of coffee down on his desk and adjusted his glasses, trying to ignore Demyx's kicked puppy look. The dirty blond before him had now been coming to see him for about nine months, after his last five officers said that he was far too much effort for them. This made Zexion Demyx's sixth Human Plane Officer, which in itself was odd, as most only went through two officers at maximum before finding one they worked well with. Even more bizarre was the fact that in Demyx's species' case, they usually worked well with the first officer they were put with.
It was pretty obvious that Demyx was a very odd werewolf.
"Demyx, we're here to discuss whether or not you have managed to secure yourself a new job, so let's get back to that-"
"Just one little date, please? I promise it'll be a really nice humanish date, I won't, like, take you hunting or something weird like that, unless you like, like that sorta thing, cause I could do that if you like and, like it'd be really nice and like, I'll-"
"Demyx."
"Yes?"
"You're saying 'like' again."
Demyx looked away from Zexion, staring at his 'Agatha Christie's The Mousetrap' mug instead, "Oh... sorry..."
The slate haired man watched the lycan carefully, wondering how to approach the situation. In all honesty, Demyx was quite attractive physically, and he was pleasant to talk to when he managed to keep the word 'like' out of his vocabulary. He was friendly, always wanted to please and, from what was written in his file, very protective of what was his, which apparently included partners, who he was loyal to, regardless of how they treated him. And really, he could do worse than a werewolf. Much much worse, if some of his previous experiences in the romance field were anything to go by.
Zexion observed the pitiful looking blond for a few more seconds, before leaning forwards, removing his glasses. "Demyx, how about I cut you a deal?"
The werewolf looked up, gazing at the quiet human once more, and being entranced by that single visible eye. "Huh?"
"Once you've secured yourself a job, I'll consider you're offer more seriously. How about that?"
Zexion was taken by surprise with how quickly that statement made Demyx's face light up, and he wouldn't have been surprised if he started wagging his tail at some point, "Really!"
"Yes, but you have to find and secure a job first."
"Okay! I won't let you down Zezzy! I'll be back in a month!" With which, Demyx skipped out of the door and hurried over to Yuffie the receptionist to book his next appointment.
A few minutes passed, in which Zexion simply sat there, staring at his glasses as he cleaned them. "...at least I've brought myself a little more thinking time..."
Two weeks had passed since Zexion had last seen Demyx, and there was currently little else on Zexion's mind apart from the lycan's request. He had even started drifting during Ansem's staff meetings, only being able to have any sort of idea what was going on with Vexen's recaps. Things were truly getting to a ridiculous point, and being stuck on Full Moon Duty was not really the best situation for the already sleep deprived officer.
Hadn't he already decided against anymore relationships with supernatural creatures? So why was Zexion even contemplating it again? He should have simply said no to Demyx and been done with it. Who cared if the werewolf was cute, endearing, and one of the few people Zexion could see spending the rest of his life with?
Zexion sighed, his breath showing up against the cold night sky. Scanning the horizon of the compound, Zexion sipped his mocha, trying to stay awake for the sake of any werewolves that should turn up for any reason. Not that they would.
Just as the human was contemplating bribing someone else to take his place, the phone next to him rang, snapping him into action.
"Hello?"
"Hey, this is Reno." Zexion's eyes widened considerably. Reno had been with his werewolf boyfriend, Zack, for well over four years, why would they need help? And why did Reno sound so out of breath and so paniced?
"This is Zexion, what's the problem?"
"I-It's Zack. We were walking like normal, and this other werewolf came over and just sniffed me, and Zack... he's just gone beserk and attacked the other one!"
The pick-up truck skidded across the mud, spraying wet dirt in a high arc, not that Zexion cared that much. He needed to find the injured werewolf and he needed to get it back to the medical unit as fast as possible. Thankfully, he didn't have to look far. Just ahead, he could see Reno gently calming a large black werewolf, who was now cleaning the redhead's hair with determination. And just a little way away, and dark gold lycan was curled up, blood streaming from a wound on his shoulder. Seeing that Reno now had Zack under control, Zexion hurried over to the other wolf, pulling out a bag of dog treats.
"Hey puppy, my name's Zexion." The wolf looked up, training his large green eyes on his face. "Now, I'm here to help you, and I have here some nice biscuits. If you come with me, you can have them. How about it?" In response, the lycan just licked his cheek. "... I'll take that as a yes."
With a wave to Reno (who was trying – in vain – to stop Zack from ripping his suit to shreds), Zexion calmly led the gold wolf back to the pickup truck, and commenced to pour the contents of the dog biscuits box into the back. He was about to get into the front of the truck to get the old banger running, when he noticed something.
The lycan had no interest in the biscuits whatsoever.
With an almighty sigh, Zexion went back over to the pitiful looking wolf and petted his head. "Now come on, I know it's not the most comfy of places, but I can get you somewhere nice and warm if you hop in-" The human let out an audible cry as the wolf leapt on him and began licking his face and neck.
Great, the wolf was in season. Time to implement dirty tactics.
"Puppy, if you get in the back of the truck, I'll let you have me all night long." Zexion tried to pull off his best 'come hither' face as the lycan looked up into his eyes in surprise. Tail wagging like crazy, the wolf bounded onto the back part of the truck, panting in anticipation.
"Wait right there puppy." Zexion gave the wolf a wink and went to the front of the truck, rummaging for his saviour and, having located it, pressing the big red button on the dashboard. Hearing the yelp of surprise, he knew the button had worked.
The wolf started turning around in circles, bewildered by the cage that had suddenly appeared around him, confining him to the back of the truck. Zexion, watching, contemplated the use of the tranquiliser on the lycan, but decided against it. It appeared the male had calmed down, much more interested in how the cage had appeared.
With a rumble of the engine, Zexion knew that this was going to be a long night.
The Office of Supernatural Creature Control was in full swing by the time Zexion turned up for work the next day, yawning loudly. Yuffie quickly asked if he'd been kept up by an incubus or something. He plainly responded that if she didn't want pictures of the Christmas party getting to Vincent, she'd shut it.
Having brought in the golden wolf, Leon, one of the few supernatural creatures on the staff, let Zexion finally go home to get some rest. The lion demon was a slave driver, plain and simple.
"Oh yeah, Zez-Zez!"
Zexion glared at Yuffie, practically growling his answer, "Yes?"
"That cute wolf you brought in last night is asking for you."
"Right, thanks." And with a sigh, Zexion headed through to the room he'd left the werewolf in. It was safe to say that the man waiting in the room was not who he expected to see.
"Zezzy! I got myself a job! They're letting me sell surfboards! Look, I even like, brought my papers like, like by total accident! And they like said I was real diligent and like that, so like, will you go out with me now like?"
The crazy blond werewolf named Demyx was as chatty as ever.
"Demyx... do you remember any of what happened to you last night?"
A simple shrug, "Haven't the foggiest clue!"
Well, that was a slight blessing. Demyx continued to chatter about how he'd done everything he could, about his new job and a few of the more memorable customers, when Zexion made up his mind.
"You know Demyx, I've been thinking about getting a pet."
"Eh?"
"You see, my house is rather lonely. It's just me in that place."
"...right?" His confused face was truly adorable.
"I quite like dogs actually, but not silly little dogs."
"Zezzy, I'm not following..."
"I really like big dogs, ones that look like wolves or something. Oh, I like glossy gold coats on them too. You know where I could find a dog like that?"
"Er... the pound?"
Zexion chuckled, how like Demyx not to understand subtlety.
"I'll date you Demyx."
The blond's eyes twinkled as he broke out into a wide grin. "Really!"
"Sure, why not."
Because really, every good rule had to have at least one exception.
A.N. Well, happy Zemyx day, and if you want more oneshots of this universe, do say so in a review.
Laters
ElegantCandyCat
