Disclaimer:Star Trek:Voyager and it's characters belong to Parmount and
it's affiliates.I own nothing.The song lyrics belong to Clay Aiken and his
record label
Chakotay watched Kathryn walk to her ready room. The day had been average. Voyager had been in open space for almost three months and the isolation was getting to the captain. She had gone to shed her tears in solitude.
What are you doing tonight?
I wish I could be a fly on your wall Are you really alone?
Chakotay soon followed her, giving control of the ship over to Tuvok. He couldn't stand to see her in such pain and loneliness. The door swished open to reveal her staring at the wall lost in thought. He knew how badly she missed home and how eager she was to get there. Her trip would be so much less lonely if she only let herself love him. Chakotay understood her need to be in control of a situation where she had very little but he would never understand her need for isolation from happiness.
Why can't I breathe you into my life?
What would it take for you to see that I'm alive?
He slowly entered as not to startle her. She turned and tried to smile through her distress.
"Can I help you, Commander?" she said acting as if nothing was wrong.
Chakotay knew better.
"Kathryn, I know you better than that, don't put a face on for me."
"I know you want to help but I'm not even sure what I need right now."
At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to bring her into his arms and let her shed the tears he knew she was holding back. But Kathryn was far too proud to lose control in front of anyone, even him. Kathryn's eyes wandered to the window. He walked towards her and placed his hand on her shoulder. She quickly shrugged it off.
"Chakotay I...you know what I'm going to say." She turned her head and meet his gaze with her vivid blue eyes.
"Of course I do. The words are burned in my mind forever. Last time you said them you broke my heart."
Chakotay hadn't planned on having this conversation with her but if that's what it took for her to see how much he cared and truly wanted her to be happy then he was willing to reopen a wound.
If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invincible
I would make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
I could just tell you were I stand
I would be the smartest man If I was invisible
Wait I already am
"Then lets not make this any more painful than it already is."
She started to walk towards the door intending to enter the bridge .
"Don't walk away from this Kathryn." He could not let this linger any longer.
"Let's deal with this now" He was determined despite her actions.
"No there's nothing left to say, it's over. I won't go through this with you again. There's nothing between us"
"There's nothing between us! How can you say that If there were nothing between us then this would have no effect on you. "
Chakotay took two steps towards her, ,put his hand on her neck dipped her and kissed her.
"Damn it Chakotay, how can you do this to me!"
The tears welled in her eyes despite her efforts to keep them subdued. She was silent for a moment , fire in her eyes. The tear lines on her face looked so out of place. Kathryn had never let him see her cry.
I wish I could read what goes through your mind
Wish you could touch me with the colors of your mind
The moments passed like years and Chakotay was afraid to say anything. Finally Kathryn spoke.
"What do you want Chakotay. For me to love you because I do. Do you want to have a life together, get married, make love to me right hereon this couch" she said every word with all the truth she knew.
"All I've ever wanted was to be with you or at least know your happy."
Kathryn walked to the couch and sat down taking in everything he was saying. She had to consider their history and there future and it overwhelmed her.
"Chakotay, will you marry me" she finally said, her voice as steady as a rock.
Chaktoay looked at her in pure confusion. First she wanted nothing to do with him and now she was asking for his hand in marriage.
"Kathryn this isn't funny."
"I'm completely serious, I've never been as serious about anything in my whole life. I thought about it and we're never going to get over each other. you know that."
Chakotay pulled a ring from his pocket. "I'd hoped to ask you one day myself.'
He'd had that ring for almost five years and never once got up the courage to present it to her. Now Kathryn was at a loss for words and decided to settle for a gesture. She took the ring and placed it on her left hand.
"Does that mean you're saying yes" He questioned.
She smiled and quickly replied "I do believe I asked you"
Chakotay grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into a kiss. Kathryn pulled away after a second.
"What's wrong" Chakotay asked.
"I wonder who won the pool."
"What? What pool?"
The one that I'm sure Tom has going." She smiled and this time she pulled Chakotay in for a kiss.
This is my first fic so I hope you enjoyed it Please review.There will be more chapters that will go through the wedding and so on.
Chakotay watched Kathryn walk to her ready room. The day had been average. Voyager had been in open space for almost three months and the isolation was getting to the captain. She had gone to shed her tears in solitude.
What are you doing tonight?
I wish I could be a fly on your wall Are you really alone?
Chakotay soon followed her, giving control of the ship over to Tuvok. He couldn't stand to see her in such pain and loneliness. The door swished open to reveal her staring at the wall lost in thought. He knew how badly she missed home and how eager she was to get there. Her trip would be so much less lonely if she only let herself love him. Chakotay understood her need to be in control of a situation where she had very little but he would never understand her need for isolation from happiness.
Why can't I breathe you into my life?
What would it take for you to see that I'm alive?
He slowly entered as not to startle her. She turned and tried to smile through her distress.
"Can I help you, Commander?" she said acting as if nothing was wrong.
Chakotay knew better.
"Kathryn, I know you better than that, don't put a face on for me."
"I know you want to help but I'm not even sure what I need right now."
At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to bring her into his arms and let her shed the tears he knew she was holding back. But Kathryn was far too proud to lose control in front of anyone, even him. Kathryn's eyes wandered to the window. He walked towards her and placed his hand on her shoulder. She quickly shrugged it off.
"Chakotay I...you know what I'm going to say." She turned her head and meet his gaze with her vivid blue eyes.
"Of course I do. The words are burned in my mind forever. Last time you said them you broke my heart."
Chakotay hadn't planned on having this conversation with her but if that's what it took for her to see how much he cared and truly wanted her to be happy then he was willing to reopen a wound.
If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invincible
I would make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
I could just tell you were I stand
I would be the smartest man If I was invisible
Wait I already am
"Then lets not make this any more painful than it already is."
She started to walk towards the door intending to enter the bridge .
"Don't walk away from this Kathryn." He could not let this linger any longer.
"Let's deal with this now" He was determined despite her actions.
"No there's nothing left to say, it's over. I won't go through this with you again. There's nothing between us"
"There's nothing between us! How can you say that If there were nothing between us then this would have no effect on you. "
Chakotay took two steps towards her, ,put his hand on her neck dipped her and kissed her.
"Damn it Chakotay, how can you do this to me!"
The tears welled in her eyes despite her efforts to keep them subdued. She was silent for a moment , fire in her eyes. The tear lines on her face looked so out of place. Kathryn had never let him see her cry.
I wish I could read what goes through your mind
Wish you could touch me with the colors of your mind
The moments passed like years and Chakotay was afraid to say anything. Finally Kathryn spoke.
"What do you want Chakotay. For me to love you because I do. Do you want to have a life together, get married, make love to me right hereon this couch" she said every word with all the truth she knew.
"All I've ever wanted was to be with you or at least know your happy."
Kathryn walked to the couch and sat down taking in everything he was saying. She had to consider their history and there future and it overwhelmed her.
"Chakotay, will you marry me" she finally said, her voice as steady as a rock.
Chaktoay looked at her in pure confusion. First she wanted nothing to do with him and now she was asking for his hand in marriage.
"Kathryn this isn't funny."
"I'm completely serious, I've never been as serious about anything in my whole life. I thought about it and we're never going to get over each other. you know that."
Chakotay pulled a ring from his pocket. "I'd hoped to ask you one day myself.'
He'd had that ring for almost five years and never once got up the courage to present it to her. Now Kathryn was at a loss for words and decided to settle for a gesture. She took the ring and placed it on her left hand.
"Does that mean you're saying yes" He questioned.
She smiled and quickly replied "I do believe I asked you"
Chakotay grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into a kiss. Kathryn pulled away after a second.
"What's wrong" Chakotay asked.
"I wonder who won the pool."
"What? What pool?"
The one that I'm sure Tom has going." She smiled and this time she pulled Chakotay in for a kiss.
This is my first fic so I hope you enjoyed it Please review.There will be more chapters that will go through the wedding and so on.
