Diagon Alley, London, England Branch of the Gringotts, Goblin-Run Bank (Based on "Fidelity Fiduciary Bank" from Mary Poppins)


Disclaimer: Still don't own Mary Poppins or Harry Potter.


Albus Dumbledore, Gringotts Goblins:

If you invest your knuts

Wisely in the bank

Safe and sound

Soon those knuts,

Safely invested in the bank,

Will compound

And you'll achieve that sense of conquest

As your affluence expands

In the hands of the directors

Who invest as propriety demands

You see, Aberforth, you'll be part of

Railways through Africa

Dams across the Nile

Fleets of flying carpets

Majestic, self-amortizing brooms

Plantations of ripening tea

All from knuts, prudently

Fruitfully, frugally invested

In the, to be specific,

In the Diagon Alley,

London, England branch of

The Gringotts Goblin-Run Bank!

Now, Aberforth,

When you deposit knuts in a bank account

Soon you'll see

That it blooms into credit of a generous amount

Semi-annually

And you'll achieve that sense of stature

As your influence expands

To the high financial strata

That established credit now commands

You can purchase purebred, prize-winning goats

Think of the variety!

Goats! Horses! Donkeys! Cows!

Barn equipment! Gourmet goat food!

Opportunities!

All manner of private breeding tools!

Everything imaginable!

Clothing! Furniture!

House-elves! Entertainment! Toys!

You see, Aberforth

Knuts, patiently, cautiously trustingly invested

In the, to be specific,

In the Diagon Alley,

London, England branch of

The Gringotts Goblin-Run Bank!