Hey! Well this is my first Eclare love story, and I hope you guys like it.
This is kinda a twisted plot, and I think I'm the 1st one to do it.
Is love just a twist of the mind? Is love just your imagination playing tricks on you, making you think that someone actually cares about you? When in reality… no one does. Well, it's true.
Sometimes the sun seems to come up just a little too early, like it misplaced its schedule and forgot that you were still tired, and not ready to get up and face the world. Face all the lies, and all the people out there that want nothing but to hurt you.
Despite my argument my alarm clock took the earth's side and sounded at exactly 6:30 A.M. I limped out of bed and looked in front of the mirror. I shook out my shaggy short hair disregarding the comb on my dresser. I threw on any skinny jeans I could find and a Dead Hand T-shirt. I grabbed my backpack, and glanced back at my room. I sighed. I threw all the sheets of my skull-covered bed back onto the mattress in an attempt to make it look like I tried to make it. I stopped on my way out and looked in the mirror. Was I satisfied? Well, it was enough for, her. It should be enough for anyone.
The day was crisp, windy and just the perfect to NOT go to before-school counseling. My mom thought it was a good idea to start off my day twice a week with a "positive" vide, when in reality, counseling usually made me so pissed I could spit. She was trying to get inside my mind, and she thinks she knows what I'm thinking. Like I'll ever listen to her bullshit.
After an angry drive to hell, I walked into the simple, non-suicidal room. As if painting the walls a happy color would make people happier. I sat down in the chair which made me even madder. I hate this place. Mrs. Marina sat delicately in a lounge chair, her hands folded in her lap, glasses hanging on the collar of her shirt. A look of disgust filled her eyes.
"Still on the gothic look?" she questioned.
"Still on the jackass look?" I thought. Like she thought that I was just going to throw out my skinny jeans and wear a freaking rainbow clown outfit for fuck's sake.
"Always have always will," I said shrugging off her idiocy. How about that for gothic?
"So let's begin," she said taking out her notepad and setting the clock for 15 minutes. "How have you been feeling?" Here we go. Such a loser, "How are you feeling?" is not going to want me to open up to you.
I sighed aloud, trying hard to be rude. "I'm doing fine, just a little empty," I said being honest. If I'm here I'd might as well try to do something.
"I know, but it's been a long time since Juli-"
I coughed loudly. Screw you. I instantly wanted to push her off a cliff. No one mentioned her aloud anymore. Especially not a bitch like her.
"I'm sorry, I know you don't like to mention.." she said, shifting in her seat.
"The name," I said pushing all the memories away. Yeah, obviously, the day I walked in here I didn't like to say her name. That's the whole reason why I'm here, do you think I wanna talk about it? No. How about we talk about the way I'm gonna push you off a cliff? How do you feel about that? Bitch.
"Well maybe you should meet someone new… maybe not a love interest right now, but just a friend to talk your mind off you know…"
"There's nothing to take my mind off of, maybe I could if you would STOP mentioning it," I said. Like that was going to happen, I wasn't the best at making friends. A hearse doesn't really scream, BE MY FRIEND!
"I'm sorry, but maybe you should just move on-"
"Move on?" I said. "Move on? You want me to just, forgot that that day didn't happen? Like it meant absolutely nothing? Are you kidding? That day left a whole in my heart. It tore up my insides, and you want me to MOVE ON?"
The bell rang. Freedom.
I got up before she could do that stupid handshake and tell me about all that bullshit about the process I've been making. She made me want to punch a hole in a tree. I got right into my hearse and pulled right out of hell and into the Degrassi parking lot hoping my furious driving wouldn't crush anyone to the dust and got out. I was 10 minutes early, I couldn't let my Mom know I was early to school; she would make me go to longer counseling sessions. Woohoo. Another 10 minutes with Satan. I climbed onto the hood of the long, black car and lounged on the hard hood. I let the sun blaze down on me. I hope it burned me up so I never had to face anyone ever again.
A new love? I couldn't even imagine loving or even dating anyone else after that incident, but it's not like I could just forget all about that day. No one can expect me. I won't forget. My stomach twists itself into millions of untie able knots whenever I think of just forgetting. My heart craves affection from someone, just anyone. My mind is an empty dark hole waiting for someone to crack a glow stick. It was filled to the very top, overflowing with absolutely nothing. And It hurt.
The bell rang. I sighed. Here we go. I hopped off the hood, locked Morty in place and climbed the steps to Degrassi. I navigated the long corridors. Strutting straight down, I guess it was either the look on my face, or the speed I was going, because no one got in my way. It was like I was the same side on a magnet, everyone reflected. I got to my locker, slammed it open and looked at my schedule. I smirked to myself. This wasn't going to be so bad after all.
First period: Junior Theater. Mrs. Dawes. Auditorium.
Theater came easy. It was the writing that always got my blood flowing. It was when I was writing when all the emotions came flooding through the pen and blasted all over a paper, creating a masterpiece of absolute horror.
I grabbed a notebook, and went to the west side of the building.
Mrs. Dawes opened the door for me when I approached the auditorium.
"Good morning, Mrs. Dawes." I said.
"Good morning, Clarebear." She said with a smile.
Did you guys like it? Did you really think it was Eli? :D
Stay tuned my friends [:
