Written for: The Golden Snitch
School: Hogwarts, Hufflepuff
Event: Scavenger Hunt, Hogwarts Four
Clue: A few people are obsessed with the Founders Era lately. Why not join them?
Word count: 556
Disclaimer: No badgers, witches or wizards were hurt in the creation of this fic!
Badgers!
"A badger? Really? That is what you want to choose for your house?" Salazar shook his head in total disbelief.
Helga folded her hands across her chest and shook her head: "And what exactly is wrong with badgers? Do tell!" "Well, there's nothing actually wrong with them, I'm sure they're nice enough animals. But I just thought maybe you'd want someone…more?" He glanced at Godric and Rowena for support. "I mean, we have a snake, a lion and an eagle. A badger just feels sort of…anticlimactic!"
Helga pursed her lips and shook her head. "I didn't make any comments when you all chose your mascots!" The three others exchanged glances, noone really wanting to be the one to dress the topic. Finally Rowena stepped forward. "Look, well, the thing is, you're right. But we all chose an animal that was…well, that was proper. An animal that was…fierce!"
"Fierce?" Helga's eyes were suddenly alight with a rather dangerous fire. Unfortunately none of the others noticed that. "Well, yeah. I mean, snakes, their sneaky. The big ones are scary just on their own but even the small ones can kill a grown man." Salazar nodded along enthusiastically. "And lions…I mean, lions are regal and dangerous." Now it was Godric's turn to nod as he motioned to the picture of lion he had open on the table. "And finally eagles. They soar the sky majestically and then swoop down and snatch you away if you are not careful! But when have you ever seen a badger do something like that?"
Helga looked about ready to snap but instead she bit her lip, sighed deeply and nodded. "Come with me, please!"
The basic rules of dealing with a badger are actually really simple. You leave it alone. You don't approach it and if it approaches you, you run. Avoid, keep your hands off, don't provoke and if it is a Honey Badger DO NOT climb up a tree or it will cut you to shreds on the very same branch that you hid on. Or just take down the whole tree. Oh, and you most definitely don't walk up to it to poke it while declaring: "See, harmless!"
Helena watched the two greatest wizards and the greatest witch of the generation run around the field just a little bit longer before finally stunning the three badgers chasing them. It took the group a few minutes longer to realize that the danger was gone and they came to a panting exhausted halt in front of the future founder of Hufflepuff.
"It cut through those ropes like they weren't even there! It's a monster!" gasped Godric glancing back at the large black and white animal that had been particularly focused on chasing him.
Rowena was simply standing, her face pale and her fingers clutching the remnants of her wand, the first and thankfully only victim of the honey badger attack. She started rocking back and forth slowly and shaking her head.
"Alright," panted Salazar, "You win. A badger is a plenty fierce mascot! Just please, get those monsters away from us, we'll let you do whatever you want with Hufflepuf as long as I never have to face one of those again!"
