at the end of the ocean

As their car drew closer to the airport, Percy felt his heart-rate quicken. He rubbed his sweaty palms against his jeans and swallowed. This was really going to happen. He was finally going to be able to see her, but the closer the car got to the terminal, the more he began to panic. Percy wasn't ready for this. Or rather, he wasn't ready for her.

"I think it's so cute that you're getting nervous to see your internet friend," Sally cooed.

"Mom!" Percy yelled. God, it felt like his cheeks were on fire. He probably looked like a fire hydrant because of how hard he was blushing.

Sally turned over her shoulder and grinned at him. "I'm sorry. I know I promised not to embarrass you in front of her. I'll do my best to keep it together," she said.

Percy sighed with relief. "Thank you."

"For the record, it's still adorable."

"You're staying in the car, Mom."

Sally laughed, and Percy was ten thousand percent sure that he was going to make a complete ass of himself. This wasn't the first time he wished he had a driver's license. But he'd only just turned 16 a few months ago, back in August before the start of the school year. He was still doing behind the wheel lessons because his life was terrible and he could never have nice things.

He smiled to himself for a second. If he'd said that to Annabeth, she probably would've laughed. Now, he wasn't one to toot his own horn, but he prided himself on his ability make her laugh. It hadn't been easy at first, if he was being completely honest. Annabeth made him laugh more often than he made her laugh.

"We're here," Sally said, interrupting his thoughts.

"Oh, really?" he asked.

"Yes, now go!"

With that, Percy opened the car door and began to run for the airport doors. "I'll park in the parking garage. You have a phone on you so call me if you need to know where I am exactly," Sally called after him.

He passed through the automatic glass doors and into the lobby. There was a television display of all the arrivals and departures, including the baggage claim areas for the flights that had flow into JFK. Philadelphia — No. Santa Fe — No. SFO. Oh, that was it! Baggage claim six.

He immediately ran, following the signs to the baggage claim. He wasn't sure why he was running. Maybe it was a little melodramatic to run, like he was in some sort of rom com, but he just couldn't wait any longer. They'd talked about this for so long, being able to meet up in person that is. Now it was finally possible, so, honestly, Percy couldn't care less if he looked melodramatic.

Percy scanned the baggage claim carousel for any sign of Annabeth. They'd skyped a few times before so he knew what she looked like. Wait, where was she? He couldn't see any sign of her. Was he at the wrong baggage carousel? No, he was at six.

"How long are you gonna stand there, Seaweed Brain?"

He turned and saw her standing there in a grey peacoat, fighting back a smile as she held a suitcase and adjusted the backpack slung over her shoulder, and he was just so overwhelmed. This was real. This was really happening. Stars danced in front of his eyes, and he realized that he hadn't been breathing.

"Annabeth?" he asked. He didn't know why he asked, but he just had to.

"In the flesh," she said, spreading her arms out wide. She couldn't hold back her smile anymore, and a teary laugh escaped her, which was possibly the most beautiful sound that he'd ever heard in his entire life.

He didn't walk over to her slowly and reverently like they did in the movies. Instead, he ran over to her and tackled her in a fierce hug and tried to ignore the fact that something was in his eyes because really, there was no way he was crying. It didn't even occur to him that he might've been invading her personal space, so he pulled back, feeling extremely awkward, when Annabeth's arms wrapped around him and held him there.

"Not yet," she whispered, and Jesus he really was crying.

She had to have been able to tell, judging by the way his entire body heaved as he stood there crying into the fabric of her coat. He probably looked so stupid, but when he felt a tear drop against the side of his neck he knew that she felt it too. It was like everything he ever imagined. They just fit together like they were made for one another, and her arms around him made him feel like was home. Home right there in a place that could never be called home, an airport. But he was home.

It felt like a lifetime and only seconds before they finally broke off the hug. Percy rubbed at his eyes with the edge of his shirt sleeve and laughed, and it was not a pretty sound. His voice was all congested from the water works that he was going through only a few seconds before. Annabeth was still smiling at him, and he could see the same myriad of emotions that he felt in himself flashing in her eyes.

"You're really here," he said, his voice raw and croaky from the crying.

"Yeah, I know right? I sure took my sweet time, but I finally made it."

"I feel like an idiot right now," Percy said, rubbing his eyes again. "I'm standing here, making a scene at the airport."

"You do have a penchant for theatrics," she quipped.

He hid his eyes behind his shirt sleeve and smiled. "Meanie," he said.

"Yeah, yeah, hurry it up, Jackson. If you keep crying you're going to flood the whole airport. People will start drowning, and the flights would canceled. They'd have to call in FEMA for disaster relief. It would be a huge mess," she said.

"You were crying too," Percy protested. Annabeth had the decency to blush a little, mumbling for him to shut up, and he felt a little bit better. They started walking together out of the baggage claim area and towards the parking garage.

Wait, what was he supposed to do with his hands? Should he just stick them in his pockets or try to hold her hand? No, no, that was too weird. No hand-holding. Maybe he could offer to help her with her luggage, but he knew she'd turn him down. God, when had this ever been something to worry about before?

"Stop thinking," Annabeth commanded.

Percy looked at her, and she cast him a sidelong glance. "You're thinking too much, so stop thinking. You're gonna ruin it if you're just stuck in your head the entire time," she said.

He put his hands in his pockets and said, "I don't like it when you're right."

"So all the time then?"

Percy snorted, and Annabeth's smirk widened just a little. He led her through the doors and into the parking garage. The car was parked near the front so he didn't even need to use his phone. Sally opened the trunk as they drew closer to the car, and she came out of the car, beaming at Annabeth.

"You must be Annabeth!" she said, wrapping her arms around her for a hug.

"It's good to meet you, Sally."

Sally looked at Percy with an upturned eyebrow. "So am I to understand that I'm a topic of discussion?" she asked, a playful lilt to her voice.

"He has nothing but good things to say about you, trust me," Annabeth said.

That seemed to please her, so once they got her luggage in the car, they drove out of the airport. The both of them sat in the backseat, not really sure what to do with his mother in the front seat. It wasn't like they were dating or anything, but it stifled the prospects of conversation. Mostly, Sally talked, and they chimed in here and there until they got to the apartment.

"So, Annabeth can have the guest bedroom," Sally said, opening the front door. "Percy you can show her where that is, and she can drop off her luggage. I'll make you both something to eat in the mean time."

"Mom," Percy said.

Sally looked at him indignantly. "You don't expect me to invite someone into my home without feeding them, do you? Really, I thought you'd know better by now."

When Percy groaned, Annabeth said, "I'm looking forward to it."

"So this is where you're going to stay," Percy said, standing in the doorway as she surveyed the room.

"It's awesome, thanks," she said.

"Okay, good, good," Percy said, shifting from side to side. "So…"

Annabeth looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "So?" she asked.

"What happens next?"

Annabeth laughed and said, "I was hoping you'd be able to tell me, Seaweed Brain. After all, you're the one that knows what's fun to do around here."

He racked his brain for ideas that were close by considering it was getting dark outside. "Well, we could go to the park near the house?" he offered.

"Ok, sure."

They tried to leave together once she'd stowed her luggage away, but Sally'd caught them and forced them to have dinner. They left after they were done eating, and the sky has turned a dark, inky blue. It was the first moment that the two of them had since the airport.

"For the record, I don't usually cry like that and stuff," Annabeth said, and Percy noted that her cheeks had turned a gentle shade of red.

He laughed and said, "Lucky for you, that is how much I cry."

"Yeah, I've noticed," Annabeth said dryly.

"The visits start tomorrow, huh?" he asked, kicking a stray pebble on the road.

She nodded. "Yeah, Columbia tomorrow, and then we're driving to Ithaca to see Cornell over the weekend, right?" she asked.

"I was thinking we could just take a train up to Cornell," Percy said, shrugging. "Unless you're really hellbent on sitting on a long car ride with my mom in the front seat."

"Point taken. Train ride it is," Annabeth said with a smile. They each sat down on swings in silence for a while.

"The whole thing feels surreal," Annabeth said.

"Yeah. I still can't believe you're here."

"Neither do I," Annabeth said, looking at him.

Percy felt his throat go dry. She was so beautiful. There was no moonlight shining down on her face. No mystical forces of nature creating a perfect moment. There was nothing out of a fantasy. They were just sitting there. Two sixteen year olds at a swingset in the park, and she was the most beautiful thing that he'd ever seen. There was that voice in his head telling him to say something, to tell her that she was beautiful, to tell her how he felt about her. As always, he stifled the voice, but now that she was actually sitting in front of him, not thousands of miles away on the other side of a computer screen, he found that he couldn't.

"What? Is there something on my face? I thought there was a bit of sauce that got on my cheek or something," Annabeth said, rubbing her cheek with a frown.

"Oh, um, no, you're fine," he stammered.

"You okay?" she asked, looking at him with an earnest look in her eyes. There was a brief moment of silence before he decided he should tell her at least some of the truth.

"Not really," he sighed. "I just feel so overwhelmed now that you're here. Like I know we both said that this felt unreal and stuff, but I'm feeling so many emotions right now, it's hard to even think straight. I just feel so much right now. Am I even making sense?"

She looked at him for a while with widened eyes, and when he stopped talking, she looked away from him quickly.

With a surreptitious cough, she said, "I guess."

"Annabeth," Percy said, surprising himself with how strong his voice sounded. When she looked at him, he said, "Do you really not know? Or are you just saying that? You know that I'm not going to judge you for having emotions, right?"

"I-I don't know, Percy. I don't know how I feel right now," she said, laughing shakily.

"It's okay," Percy said, smiling. "It's okay. We don't need to know how we feel right now. We'll work it out. Let's just try to make the best of the time that you're here."

"Yeah, you're right," she said, looking up.

They left the park a short while and after they went to their separate rooms to sleep, Percy lay awake in bed, thinking of one of their conversations way back when they first started talking and getting to know one another. It was inevitable that the topic turn to romance at one point or another.

[annabeth]: idk i've always been too busy with school to give boys and dating a try.

[percy]: that's fair. i'm not sure i'd know what to do in a relationship, tbh.

[annabeth]: same. i don't think it would even work out with anyone i know either. i don't feel any connection with them, or like them back in a romantic kinda way. like i think some of the guys in my school are good looking and stuff, but i don't really feel anything for them.

[percy]: didn't you try a long-distance thing that one time?

[annabeth]: you mean with luke?

[percy]: yeah.

[annabeth]: oh i don't know, i liked him, but we were only ever friends. i didn't really ever let him know how i felt. after i moved, we tried to keep talking as friends, but it's just one of those things where you just drift apart.

[percy]: do you think that was because long distance things aren't possible?

[annabeth]: i don't know, probably. it's not an easy thing for sure, and i just don't see it working out. it'd be too much effort for almost no payoff.

Maybe it was stupid to remember a conversation from so long ago, but that was the biggest thing that held him back from ever telling Annabeth how he felt. The way he saw it, there was nothing that would ever come of it.

He wasn't even sure he really liked her. She was the most important person to him apart from his mom, but he wondered if he was just projecting romantic thoughts onto her because it was easy to be around her. He liked being friends with her. Taking things to a relationship would jeopardize the whole thing. He could lose her forever, and just thinking about that made him feel empty inside.

Looking on it now, Percy realized that he'd be devastated if they stopped being friends. The idea was almost incomprehensible to him. The idea of a future without Annabeth in his life made no sense to him, and it wasn't a future he wanted. That didn't he wanted to marry her or something. He liked her as friends, sure, but if he actually wanted a future where they stayed in each other's lives, wouldn't they have to be married?

Percy almost dismissed the idea immediately, when a new thought came into his head. He imagined Annabeth dating someone else; kissing him; loving him. The wave of repulsion that flowed through him disturbed him. This was wrong. He couldn't be possessive of a human being like that. It was scary how much he couldn't stand the idea of her being with someone else. Even if he didn't like her as more than a friend, the prospect of her ending up with someone else made him physically sick. Maybe that was because he did like her as more than a friend.

"Fuck," Percy swore quietly.

This was so fucking confusing. What was he supposed to do?

If he told her how he felt, she would almost definitely reject him because she didn't like him like that. If that weren't the case and she did like him in some outlandish improbable scenario, she would still say no because it would be a long distance relationship. Even if that were to pan out, there was still a chance he'd just lose her forever if the relationship ever went south. At least if they were just friends, things would be safer — he'd have her in his life without that risk. Friendships could be mended, but relationships couldn't, Percy reasoned.

Still, the thought that she might end up with someone else, the thought that she'd see some other guy on the other end of the Skype call, laughing with her, being with her—kissing her—Percy smothered a groan into his pillow, and he felt butterflies in his stomach. What the fuck was wrong with him? Why was he thinking about kissing her?

There was no way he could win in this scenario. He knew this, and he felt a deep seated sense of hopelessness wash over him. It felt like his friendship with her was already doomed, like it was hurtling towards an inevitable conclusion that would leave him completely broken. There was no way this would work. There was no way it could work.

He forced himself to calm down. It was okay. She was here now. Annabeth was right. If he got stuck in his head, it wouldn't matter if she was here or not. As long as he experienced every moment that she was here with all of his might, then he would be fine. He could be close to her for the next few days. That was enough. That was enough. It was this thought that ultimately lulled him to sleep.

The line into the Empire State Building was as long as it always was, but Percy was getting closer to the entrance. There was only one problem. Annabeth was nowhere in sight. She'd promised to meet him in line after her visit was done at Columbia, but it'd been a long while now and she still hadn't come back.

"Next!"

Percy gave the guard a strained smile. "Um, I'll let the group ahead of me go. I'm waiting for someone to get back," he said.

The guard shrugged and let the next people in. After the second group left, Annabeth sprinted into his view as she ran over to him. She gave him a wave, and the sight of her made his slowly mounting irritation from standing in line for a few hours vanish instantly.

"Sorry I'm late," she said, panting as she held her knees. "Tour went on a little longer than it should've. Sorry."

"You're good," Percy said. "I really hope you have some deodorant on you because I don't like sweaty people."

Annabeth glared at him and shoved him a little, and he had to suppress a laugh. "Asshole," she grumbled as they shuffled into the building.

Once they were inside, Annabeth's expression completely transformed. She looked at everything with childlike wonder in her eyes. Percy swore she was glowing. Her eyes scanned every inch of the lobby space, and Percy had to lead her over to the elevator by pulling her by the wrist. When they were in the elevator, Annabeth finally looked back at him.

"I'm in the Empire State Building," she whispered.

Percy laughed and gently hit her head with his hand. "Yeah, you are, you dork. Try not to be this loopy up there or you'll fall off," he said.

"We're standing in a building that's 300 years old. Doesn't that just blow your mind?"

"Yeah, it does, Annabeth," he said, smiling softly.

She started to go off, animatedly spewing architecture facts left, right, and center, and Percy was glad that there wasn't anyone in the elevator with them or they'd have told her to shut up. Personally, he thought it was incredible when Annabeth got like this. It was one of his favorite things about her, and he was a little sad when they finally left the building after spending close to an hour at the top.

"I'm going to need to call me dad and tell him all about this tonight," she said excitedly once they were back in Percy's apartment. They were sitting in his room, talking to themselves as they waited for Sally to come back home.

"I thought your dad wasn't into architecture though?" Percy asked.

Annabeth shrugged and said, "He is into history though. He's a history professor back home, remember?"

Percy nodded, and they continued to talk until Sally came home and made them dinner. Annabeth told Sally all about the experience, and both Jackson's watched her with fond attention. After dinner, Annabeth went to talk to her dad on the phone, and Percy stayed back to help his mom with the dishes.

"She's incredible," Sally said with a laugh.

"Yeah, she just gets really into stuff that she's passionate about. When she's talking about architecture, I feel passionate about it too for a second just because of how much she loves it," Percy said.

"She's a special girl," Sally said, handing him a dish to dry.

"Yeah," he said pensively, rubbing the dishes in circle with a small towel.

"So when are you going to tell her you love her?"

Percy looked up and frowned. "Mom!"

Sally looked at her son with a serious expression, and Percy blinked. "I'm serious, Percy. I know how you feel about her. It's obvious to see. When are you going to tell her how you feel? You only have a few days left," she said.

"I-I can't. Even if I could, she doesn't want to do long distance," he protested.

Sally's eyes narrowed. "Isn't what you guys have now a long distance relationship?" she demanded.

Percy rubbed the back of his neck and averted his eyes. "Well, yeah, but we're not— I mean we're just friends," he said.

"It's not going to be any different, Percy. If you love her, you'll find a way to make it work. I know you will," she said softly.

For a while, he was silent as he stared at the ground. "I just don't want— I can't lose her," he said, and he hated how soft, how vulnerable his voice sounded.

"Percy," Sally said, putting her hands on his shoulders. "Love's not easy. It's about risks. You can still lose her if you stay friends for the same reasons you'd lose her if you were together. Worse, as friends you could lose her to someone else, and would you be able to withstand that? You just need to be brave, honey."

There was a pause before Percy shook his head. "I—I can't, Mom. She—We're just friends. That's it," he said.

Sally looked at him for a long while before saying, "It's your life, Percy. I won't tell you how to live it. You're old enough now to make your own decisions. I just don't want you to regret this years down the line. I don't want you to look back on this moment and curse yourself for not having the courage to tell her how you felt," she said before leaving the kitchen.

Percy stood there alone in the kitchen for a while. It felt like his head was going to explode. He drank a glass of water before deciding that it would be best to sleep it off. When he passed Annabeth's room, the lights were already off. He reasoned that she must've already gone to sleep, so he went to his room and tried to do the same. What he didn't notice was the sound of someone running back into her room when he said that they were only friends.

The next few days passed by in a blur. They went to Ithaca to see Cornell, spent more time in the city, and went to see all that they could. Through it all, Percy was so happy, but the dread that came with each passing day only increased. He wished time would slow down or stop because each second that passed brought the inevitable end. Annabeth would have to fly back.

In all this time, he continued to agonize over what to do. He still had no idea, and it was driving him insane. Eventually, the last day came, and they both sat in silence on the car ride to the airport.

"You excited to be heading home, Annabeth?" Sally asked.

"I'm not sure, Ms. Jackson."

Then a little while later, Sally asked Percy, "Did you take her to Ellis Island to see the Statue of Liberty?"

"Yeah."

Sally's fingers tightened around the steering wheel. No matter what she tried, she couldn't get them to start talking to one another. She eventually gave up, and they reached the airport shortly after. Percy followed Annabeth inside and stood in line with her as she waited to get her boarding pass. They still didn't speak a word to each other.

When Annabeth gave her luggage to the security personnel, she turned back to Percy and tried to smile.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye, huh?" she said.

Percy rubbed the back of his neck. "Y-Yeah, I guess it is. It was really great having you here and stuff. I had a lot of fun," he said, not meeting her eyes.

"Same, thanks for letting me stay at your place. Tell Sally that I'm grateful for her hospitality too," Annabeth said, shifting on her feet.

"Will do."

There was a pause and then, "Well, I guess I should start heading to my gate then," Annabeth said.

Percy nodded numbly, and they stood there looking at each other, both wondering if the other would try to hug them. When neither of them made the effort, Annabeth forced one final smile before she turned around and walked to the escalator. The reality of the situation was hitting him. She was really leaving. In that moment, a thousand different thoughts flew through his head like a hurricane. In his head, he could hear voices screaming at him to choose, to choose because she was leaving.

"Annabeth, wait!" Percy shouted.

She froze and turned around as he ran over. "Annabeth, I—I just want to say that, um," he began before choosing a different approach. "You know me more than anyone else. You probably know me more than I know myself. And I think I know you too. I feel like I've always known you, like we've always known each other, and I know that sounds corny but I swear it's real to me. I care about you more than anyone else."

"Percy—" Annabeth began.

"Wait, just let me finish. I promise I'll let you talk. It's just that if you interrupt me I'll get too scared and stop talking. So please just let me finish," he said, and Annabeth nodded cautiously.

"Like I said, I really care about you. When I'm with you, I feel completely different. I feel like I can be myself and that you wouldn't judge me for that. You can always understand me, and you know just what to say when I need help, and I'm so grateful for that. I just—" Percy said, visibly struggling.

"I just want you to know that I really like you, okay? There I said it. I really like you, Annabeth. I just wanted you to know that before you left. I wanted to tell you face to face. I'm just wondering if you feel the same way," he asked.

It felt like his heart had lodged itself in his throat. Swallowing and breathing felt difficult to do. A thousand different emotions flew across Annabeth's face, and Percy waited with bated breath for her answer. The last emotion he registered was of helplessness before her face became a perfectly still one.

"I don't feel the same way, Percy. I'm sorry," she said.

There were probably a thousand ways to describe how Percy felt in that moment, but the most honest way would be to say that he was devastated.

"B-But—Can I at least ask why?" he asked, unable to keep the desperation from seeping into his voice.

"There's no why," Annabeth said, her eyes screwed shut. "It wouldn't work out between us. I don't feel the same way."

"Those are two entirely different things—" Percy protested.

"You're the one that said you wanted us to just be friends to your mom. Isn't that what you want? Isn't that what you told your mom or did you lie to her?" Annabeth demanded, and she was suddenly angry.

Percy opened his mouth and tried to find words to say. "I—I said that because I felt it at the time, but I feel differently now," he stammered.

"So you just decide that you like me in the span of three days? Is that what you're telling me?" Annabeth asked.

"Why does the time frame matter? Why're you being so angry about this?" Percy asked helplessly. He felt like he was drowning — he couldn't breathe.

Annabeth looked at a loss for words, but she still looked angry. Finally, she stared into his eyes and said, "You're a coward, Percy Jackson. Now, I have a flight to catch. Bye."

Percy stood there dumbly as she walked away. He left after she disappeared beyond the escalator. It was like he was in a daze as he walked back to the car. He opened the door mechanically and sat down in the front seat.

"What happened? Is everything okay?" Sally asked.

"It didn't go well. I don't want to talk about it."

Sally wanted to know what was wrong, but she knew that look on his face meant that there was nothing that would through to him now. So they drove back to the apartment in silence, and Percy immediately vanished into his room and locked the door behind him. For a while, he just laid on his bed, his face smushed against the pillow as hot tears rolled down his face and spilled onto the pillowcase.

God, he was so stupid. Percy felt like the biggest idiot in the world. He didn't understand what had happened, but he knew that he should've just kept quiet about it. He shouldn't have said anything to her at all. Just a hug and a "Have a safe trip!" would've been more than enough. Why did he have to go melodramatically confess his love to her in an airport?

He tried his best to sleep, but Percy literally felt like he was dying. There was no way that she'd ever talk to him again after this. He could still hear her words in the airport bouncing around his head: You're a coward, Percy Jackson. What did that even mean? He was a coward for being brave enough to tell her how he felt? That made no sense at all. It didn't matter. He'd lost her. He'd lost Annabeth.

It hit him all at once. He'd never be able to talk to her. He'd never try to make lame jokes to make her laugh. He'd never feel that rush when the green dot next to her email address came up. He'd never do anything with her ever again. He was out of her life, and she was out of his.

It felt like every atom inside his body was on fire. There was a void inside him, sucking everything up like a black hole. It hurt so fucking bad. It hurt unlike anything he'd ever experienced, and he finally understood why it was called heartbreak because it felt like it was rupturing inside his chest.

He screamed into his pillow. He felt like he was bleeding roses for Annabeth, and he was watching her bury them all in the sand. He must've cried for hours, and for every second that he spent crying, he hated himself. He hated himself for telling her how he felt. He hated himself for this weakness. It felt like he was being a baby, crying for no reason. Annabeth was just a girl. There were literally millions of other girls in the world. So why did it feel like none of them mattered, not when they were compared to her? But most of all, he hated himself for losing her.

His thoughts continued to torture him until he exhausted himself, and the last thought he had before surrendering to sleep was that he wished that he'd never met Annabeth at all.

They all said that it would get better over time, that it was supposed to hurt this bad because it was his first heartbreak. Percy wanted to tell these people to get away from him. He didn't need their useless words. They just served to inflame the wound, to remind him of it.

Most of the next days merged into one homogenous blob of time, one that defied linearity. He tried not to think about her, but the more he tried not, the more he did. It was like hell on earth. Every day, just the simple task of existing was more painful than he could bear. Most of all, he kept wondering how she was doing through all of this. Did she miss him? Was she even thinking about him at all? What if she turned him down because she liked someone else? What if she was dating that someone else now?

There were just questions, and they kept coming and coming and coming until his head was so full of them it felt like he didn't know anything anymore. Nothing made sense. Everything hurt. That was all he knew. He was in pain.

"You're not eating your dinner," Sally said.

Percy looked up from his soup with a blank stare. "What?"

"Your soup. You're not eating it. I know this is difficult, but you need to eat, Percy."

"No, you don't understand, Mom. Everyone keeps telling me that they understand, that they know what this feels, but they don't! I'm sick and tired of it!" he shouted.

"Percy, look at me," Sally said.

When he looked up, she said, "You're talking to the woman that lost a husband. Don't you think I know how this feels, what it's like to lose someone who was your whole world? I was pregnant with you, and I was alone. I didn't know how I was going to take care of you. I didn't know much of anything. But I made it through because I couldn't afford to wallow in grief when I knew I'd have to take care of you. Trust me when I say that it gets easier."

"I lost her. It's my fault. It's my fault. If I'd just not said anything, she'd still be here. It's my fault," Percy blubbered, and his tears started to fall onto the table.

Sally went over to him and wrapped him in a hug. "Hey, it's okay. It's not your fault. There's nothing wrong with putting your heart out there. There's nothing wrong with letting someone know that you care about them. That's what you did, and I'm proud that you did, even if it ended up badly. You'll be okay."

"She said I was a coward," Percy mumbled.

Sally pulled away from him and looked at him. "What? Percy what exactly happened? You didn't tell me on the ride back home so I didn't think of asking later since you were still just starting to deal with it."

Percy took a deep breath and told her what had happened. When he finished, Sally looked at him with a hard look on her face.

"You have to talk to her again," she said flatly.

"What?" Percy said, frowning. "No way! She doesn't want anything to do with me."

"Percy, she was confused. She heard you say you were just friends and then you spring this up on her out of the blue? No wonder she turned you down. She probably spent the entire trip thinking that you only thought of her as friends, so she probably didn't believe you when you said you liked her. You have to talk to her and explain it to her," Sally said.

Percy shook his head. "She doesn't want to talk to me," he muttered.

"Perseus Jackson, this is exactly what Annabeth meant when she called you a coward. When are you going to stop making excuses to keep you from getting what you want? If you're not going to make an effort, then you have no right to complain. If you've done everything you could, fought with everything you have, and it doesn't pan out, that's a different story. But there's still something you can do now, so go do it," Sally ordered.

Percy sat there for a while in silence before he left for his room. For a while, he sat on his bed not doing anything except for staring up at the ceiling. There was a faint glimmer of hope now, but he was so terrified of it. It was better when he didn't have that hope because then he couldn't get disappointed. He was at rock bottom, and that assured him that the only way to go from here was up. Now, he was confronted by the prospect of getting his heartbroken for a second time by the same person. If he was being honest, Percy didn't think that he could handle a second rejection from her. Going through it once was bad enough.

The more he thought about it, the more he realized that there wasn't much more Annabeth could do to hurt him anymore than she already had. If she turned him down, he was in the same situation as before — nothing had changed. But if he hashed out the misunderstandings and made everything clear, then maybe, just maybe, they could be okay again. The chance of even being able to talk with her was enticing.

He opened his laptop and logged into his email account. There was always the chance that she wasn't going to be online. Maybe she blocked him or something. No such luck. Sure enough, there was a green dot next to her name. She was online. He opened the chat and sat there for a while, trying to muster the final bit of courage that would help him finish this.

"Hey," he typed.

The wait that ensued was the longest of his life. About two minutes later, but what felt like two centuries later, he got a response.

"Hey."

"Can you take a call?" he asked.

There was another brief pause. "Sure, give me a minute."

Percy took a deep breath and looked at his cellphone. He picked it up and scrolled to Annabeth's contact info and called her. The phone rang three times before she picked up.

"Hello?"

"Annabeth? It's Percy."

"Yeah, I know."

In the past, she would've added a "Seaweed Brain" to the end of that sentence. Maybe this was a terrible idea after all. Still, she'd agreed to and answered his call, so he decided just to forge onwards.

"I've been think about what happened at the airport and stuff, and what you told me, and you're right. I was a coward. I should've told you how I felt. I should've been honest from the outset instead of saying something I didn't believe. I just didn't know if it was even a possibility for something to ever happen between us. You said that you didn't think long distance relationships would work way back when, so I didn't think think I ever stood a chance. I know I said this already, but I really like you. A lot. I just wanted to be transparent about that. It's the honest truth," he said.

"Percy, what do you want me to say?" Annabeth asked helplessly.

"You don't need to say anything, Annabeth. I just—Not being able to talk to you hurts more than anything else I've ever felt in my life. I lost you, and it's my fault. I know that. It's my fault, and it tears me up inside. I've tried and I can't stop thinking about you. You're my best friend. It's hard to just lose that person because you fucked up, you know? And I know that I can't fix this now, but I just wanted you to know how I felt," he said.

There was a pause, and Percy's heart sank as he thought she might've hung up. "I—This can't work, Percy. I appreciate you wanting to tell me and stuff, but you said it yourself. This wouldn't work out," she said.

"Annabeth, what we had was long distance. What broke that was actually us being together in one place because I messed up. We've already done this. There's nothing new apart from our relationship changing. It'll still be as easy to maintain a relationship as it was for us to be friends these past few years," he said.

"I'm so confused," she said. "I don't know what to do."

"I am too. I don't know what to do either, Annabeth. I just know that I want you in my life," he said.

Her voice across the line sounded like she was close to tears. "I'm so scared."

Percy smiled. "That's okay," he said. "It's okay to be scared."

"I panicked at the airport, and I'm so sorry for what I said. I just didn't know what to do. I was so scared. I spent the whole trip thinking you just wanted to be friends, and I was like, 'Okay i can deal with that if that's what he wants,' but then at the airport you just said you liked me out of the blue. I had no idea if you were being honest, and then I just got really mad because I was frustrated. It was so hard having to kill how I felt about you after I heard you say that we were only friends. It felt like you were cheating, like you were being a coward admitting it then when you should've done that before if that's how you felt," Annabeth rambled.

"I'm sorry," Percy said softly. "Really, I'm sorry. I'm an idiot."

"Yeah, you are," Annabeth said, sniffling. "A real idiot. A seaweed brain."

"So do you actually feel the same way about me?"

There was a pause before he heard Annabeth's tremulous voice. "Y-Yes."

The relief that washed over him was impossible to describe. "Okay, that's all that matters. I know you're scared. I'm scared too, but we can make this work. We just fit. I know that we can do this if we try. I just need you to tell me that you're willing to do that, that you're willing to try," he said.

"It could go wrong. We could just end up hurting each other."

Percy laughed. "Then we'll be right back where we are now, at square one, I guess."

There was another pause. "I-I want to try," she said. "I want to try."

"Really?"

"Really," she said.

"Okay."

"You're an idiot."

"I know."

"You're my idiot."

"I know."

"Stop saying you know. You don't know. You didn't until I told you," Annabeth argued.

Percy couldn't but smile. "I don't know a lot of things, but if there's one thing that I do it's that I'm an idiot, more specifically your idiot," he said.

"Oh my god, you're so fucking cheesy."

"Rude."

"Ok, not gonna lie, that was actually pretty clever."

"Is that a tone of admiration I hear?"

"Don't push your luck, Jackson."

"Why're you so mean to me, Chase?"

He could hear her laughing on the other end. "I'm never gonna make things easy for you, Seaweed Brain. Get used to it."

And he could.

And he did.