The lyrics are from a song called "Locomotive Breath" by Jethro Tull (prog-rock band). Please read and review.
Disclaimer: No, I don't own Naruto. Or the lyrics to "Locomotive Breath".
Into the shuffling madness
Of locomotive breath
Runs the all-time loser
Headlong to his death
Uzumaki Naruto had once been a complete loser. He had the lowest grades in his class, failed the genin exam three times, and his crush liked another guy. However he thought he had it made, now that he was ANBU and his crush was his girlfriend. But things took a bad turn.
He hears the pistons scraping
Steam breaking on his brow
Old Charlie stole the handle
And the train, it won't slow down!
No it won't slow down
No it won't slow down
He had caught his best friend, Uchiha Sasuke, in bed with his girlfriend, Haruno Sakura. "Naruto-kun!" she said, "I can explain!" He seriously doubted that.
He sees his children jumping off
The stations one by one
His best friend and his woman
In bed and having fun
He stood in front of the train today, with no reason to live. His Sakura-chan, the only reason he had stayed on Team 7, cheated on him with his best friend. And now she wanted forgiveness? She was one of Sasuke's biggest fangirls.
He's crawling through the corridor
On his hands and knees
Old Charlie stole the handle
And the train, it won't slow down!
No it won't slow down
No it won't slow down
He heard the train coming. Good, he thought. Life has no meaning to me anymore. He spoke aloud, "Goodbye, Sakura" The train was coming. And, no, it didn't slow down. But neither did Haruno Sakura. She sped forward, as she saw, plowing both herself and Naruto out of the way. They landed in the dirt, their faces centimeters apart.
"Sakura…Why?" croaked Naruto. She'd still have her darling Sasuke-kun to keep her company. "You'd still have Sasuke-teme to keep you company."
"I wanted to tell you, he raped me," she said. "I had no time to respond." It was true. The Uchiha had been jealous of Naruto, and attacked her.
"Yeah, right," snorted Naruto. "You could've taken teme if you wanted." She probably didn't want to, though. She was enjoying it, said an angry voice in his head. Come on, have you ever been in bed with Sakura? She was one of teme's biggest fangirls. A calmer voice replied, Well, maybe Sasuke-teme did force her with him. After all, he isn't exactly the nicest person. And I thought he was a friend. Sakura injected into his mind's conversation.
"I may have been with Sasuke, but he forced me. He saw you and me together, and was jealous. Naruto-kun, I love you," she said. "And right now, I'll prove it." She kissed him passionately, dancing her tongue inside his mouth. But she was with Sasuke-teme, his brain said. Think later, his heart responded. Make-out now. He responded intensely to the kiss, overpowering her completely, and she melted in his arms.
Maybe she was right, said the angry voice, now calming down. We all know teme. He's been evil, so this is probably nothing new.
"I love you too…Sakura-chan" he responded from his heart, pulling her in for another kiss. I'm gonna have a long talk with that bastard, he thought. The train may not have slowed down, but Naruto had gotten out of the way.
OWARI
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