The Inevitable
Part I: The Unexpected
Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy or Private Practice.
A/N: Maddison angst. Constructive criticism much appreciated. Oneshot, first time. This is set in two parts. Set a year after the crossover plus flashbacks. Mainly about Mark. WARNING: Character death and strong coarse language. Enjoy.
You're sitting in the Emerald City Bar in Seattle. It's been a year since the incident. A year since you last made love to the woman who opened your eyes, again. You're half passed out on the counter. You've had countless one night stands over the course of the year but none of them have been able to make you feel like Addison Forbes Montgomery made you feel. The one thing that you count on is getting drunk. You've had a dozen shots and maybe four scotches.
"Dr. Sloan?" the bartender, Joe, asked.
"'M 'kay, Joe," you slur your words, trying to get up. You see that your glass is almost empty. You down the rest and ask Joe for some more.
"I don't think that's a good idea, Dr. Sloan. Getting drunk won't help you, you know." Good old Joe, you thought. You shove the glass in front of his face. "Okay. You're gonna have one hell of a hangover tomorrow morning." He refills it and you think about what had happened last year.
Flashback, one year ago... You are sulking around the hospital, staring at nurses asses, trying to pick which one you'll fuck next. You feel your pager buzz, saying to go to the nearest nurse's station. You walk there, Nurse Tyler looking up. He gives you the phone. "Hello?" you ask. "Is this Dr. Mark Sloan?" a voice asks. A familiar voice, one that you heard one time, when you visited L.A. "Yes, it is. Who's calling?" "Hi, this is Dell. I work at Oceanside Wellness Center as the receptionist. Addison Forbes Montgomery was my coworker." Your heart skips a beat as he says that name. Addie. You notice he says was instead of is. "Why are you calling?" "Dr. Montgomery commited suicide yesterday and," You lean against the counter, your legs not enough to support your weight as they turned to jelly, "You are the last person to see her and the police are looking over to see why she commited suicide. She didn't leave a note, you see." You rub the back of your neck. You pace back and forth, trying to wrap your head around it. "Are you still there, Dr. Sloan?" "I am. Do you want me to come down to L.A.?" "Yes, sir. We are hoping you would do that." "I'll get on the next plane out to L.A. Is there going to be a funeral?" "Yes. I suggest you tell her family, friends, and loved ones to come down to L.A." "Thank you, Dell. I'll see you soon." "Goodbye, Dr. Sloan." You hang up. Your hand is shaking as you pass it to Nurse Tyler. You take steady steps, not towards an O.R. or a patient room. You take steps to a closet or an on-call room, somewhere private. You find one. You close the door and slam your fist in it. You feel pain and that's what you needed. You punch it over and over again until your hand bleeds. Then, you switch over to the next one. You punch the door until your hand bleeds. You feel yourself shaking, tears streaming down your face, an unfamiliar feeling. You fall down slowly, sobbing uncontrollably, the pain too great for words. "Who's in here?" someone asks as they open the door. You look up and see Callie. She rushes over and hugs you but you try to push her away. "Stop fighting this, Mark!" she yells. You stop fighting and she hugs you. She looks at your hands and gently picks one up. "Oh, Mark. What happened?" You didn't want to say the words. They were too painful to even think about. You sob harder, Callie staying there, trying to get you to calm down. A few minutes pass, the tears stopping along with your body. Callie lets go of you. "Thank you," you choke out. "You'll need stitches on your hands," she says. You stand up gently and you follow her out to the nearest abandoned hospital bed. You sit down as she goes to get a suture kit. She comes back and you don't say a word. "What happened?" she asks as she finishes up on your left hand and she goes to the right. "My life's fucking fucked up to shit," you reply bitterly. You look up at her and say, "Everyone needs to come down to L.A. for Addie's fucking funeral." Callie looks at you abruptly. You stare at her, feeling your body shake again, feeling your heart take in the pain it's feeling. You fight the tears as best you can. "You're done," Callie says. She puts bandages on your knuckles, wiping a tear here and there from her eyes. "Are you going to tell the Chief?" "I have to." "I'll go with you," Callie gently takes your hand and squeezes it. You let go and walk solemnly over to the chief's office. You don't bother to knock, you just step inside, sitting on the chair in front of him. "What brings you here Dr, Sloan?" Richard asks. "Addie's dead. She commited suicide. We need to go down to L.A. to attend her funeral. I suggest you tell everyone." You get up and walk out, the pain coming back everytime you think about her. The next day, you're in L.A. You don't enjoy the sun, you don't enjoy the surf, you don't enjoy the waves. You prepared a speech at her eulogy, Callie with you. You asked for her because you don't know if you could handle writing down everything about Addison that makes her wonderful. She stands next to you as you stand, speaking praise about the woman you once loved. "Addison Forbes Montgomery. She was always been a wonderful person. She used to save the lives of babies as a neonatal surgeon." You stop, staring at the paper. You crumple it up and you stare at everyone. "Addie was the love of my life. I've fallen in love with another girl, she's amazing, but she wasn't Addison." You shake your head. "Addie has always known me as the manwhore, picking up girls for one night and sneaking out the next morning. But with her, I stopped for a moment and took it all in. Derek," you look towards your best friend, "I've been in love with Addison since before you guys were married. You had already taken her so I became her best friend." You chuckle. "Everyone here should be greatful to have even met Addison. She was funny and so beautiful and I'm glad to have fallen in love with her." You heart warms. You go back to your seat, smiling. No one smiles at funerals. You smile because you don't want to feel the pain again. The funeral was somber. You kiss Addison on the cheek and whisper 'I love you' before they bury her. The funeral is over and you drive to the hotel but take a detour to somewhere else. You were set to go back to Seattle the next day. You go to the practice and go straight to Addison's room. A blonde haired guy is packing Addie's things up. The guy, who you assumed, was Dell. Dell stops packing stuff and looks at you. "Are you Dr. Sloan?" You nod. "The police will be here. I'm glad you came. Um..." he takes something out of his pocket and hands it to you. "She jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge and we found this next to where she jumped." You take it. It's a picture of you and Addie, in New York, smiling in Central Park. He had remembered that day. You took the picture right after you said 'I love you' for the first time to her. The picture was folded more times than you could count. You imagine her on the bridge, clutching the photo and then jumping. "Isn't this like evidence or something?" you ask. Dell shook his head and you put smash it into your pocket. The cops come in and ask you questions. You don't remember what you said, the picture in your pocket the only thing on your mind. They say goodbye and your on your way to the parking lot. You start your car and wait for it to warm up. You pull the picture from your pocket and set it on the dashboard. You smile and tears fall down your face. You drive back to the hotel. You sleep and dream of Addison but you wake up not wanting to see her when you know it really isn't her. The next morning, you go back to Seattle and you get drunk and you pick up a random girl and you fuck her and you try to forget about Addison. But that was your problem, you couldn't forget Addison. The girl under you was not her and you quickly get up and put on your clothes. "What the fuck, asshole?! You don't want to get fucked?!" she asked, obviously pissed. You ignore her and slam the door on your way out. You go back to Joe's and you get drunk, again. End of flashback...
Review please.
