I was flying my aircraft through the Bermuda triangle. I had taken a bet given to me by some friends of mine. Well, I say Friends, they were really just stuck up rich syn sukas that supplied me with money for war bird restoration, and they got drunk at a budget meeting, and bet me 2.5 million dollars that I wouldn't go through the triangle. I took that bet. My name is William Kovalenko, A Russian-American Pilot. I am 29 years old. And I am a brony.
Most of my old friends ditched me when they found out that I was a brony. I didn't care. They were shallow anyway. Mamu tebya's. I fell into a deep drinking depression. There was one person who had stayed with me throughout the whole experience. This was Lydia. My beautiful wife and mother of my unborn child.
My Doppler radar beeped at me, pulling me out of my thoughts. I look at the little screen. It showed a deep, funnel cloud shaped object ahead, I looked out of my forward windscreen, and sure enough, there was what looked like a tornado coming out of the water, but it had flashes of blue and green and red throughout. I tried to steer clear, but the powerful winds pulled my custom King Air 350 into the the funnel. My instruments failed on me. My altimeter was spazing out, my airspeed indicator was crushed, and my fuel gage said I was gaining fuel. My artificial horizon said I w as spinning and looping and doing all sorts of shit. My aircraft began to tear apart, and then and explosion ripped what was left of my plane to pieces. Everything went black. I woke up and looked around. All I could see was white I heard a deep, somewhat fatherly voice speak to me. "William Kovalenko. You are dead, and your are in my purgatory, waiting for my decision as to whether you should go to Heaven, hell, or someplace else."
"Who are you?" I asked.
"That is none of your concern. I shall now assess all of your deeds and see where you should go. Well, you been fairly well, you're very God-fearing, but there was that one time in Reno. All in all, you have been a good person, but your life was so short, so I would like to give you another chance to live life to the fullest. I'm not sending you back to Earth though. I think I shall send you to Equestria." he said
Did I just hear Equestria? The Fuck? "Well, thank you, "I said," But before I go can you do me a favor?" I asked.
"What do you want me to do?" he said.
"Tell my wife I love her." I said
"Very well. Be on your way." he said.
Everything went black.
