Anime
Detour skit to be.
Actors:
Orochimaru:
Austin
Kisame Hoshigaki: James
Itai/Femtachi Uchiha:
Ashley
Itachi Uchiha:???
Kisame:
"STOP! I WANT TO SHAVE YOU TO DEAD, YOU DAMNED ITACHI
IMPOSTER!" Femtachi: Kisame: Femtachi: Kisame:
Itachi:
Kisame:
Itachi:
Kisame:
Itachi: Femtachi:
"You'll
never catch me that way!"
Sticks out tongue, running across
stage
Swings
sword, as he gets poked in the stomach
"The
hell?"
"You're so cute
when you're angry!"
Pokes
his nose, dodging the Samehada (Sword)
"Too,
slow pretty!"
Runs
off stage, unnoticed
Grunts
turning around, jumping startled
"Ita-Itachi!"
Swings
Samehada
"What
the hell did YOU eat this morning?"
Kisame: "YOU!!"
Raises
Samehada
Femtachi: "Aren't you spiffy!"
Itachi: Utterly
confused
"Who the HELL
are you?! And why the HELL do you look like me?!"
Backstage person: "PLASTIC SURGERY!"
Itachi: ". . . . ."
Femtachi: "You actually talked to me! I'm amazed! And you're even cuter closer up!"
Orochimaru: "Quite the pretty,
wouldn't you agree, Itachi? She could bear my
child!"
Chuckles
Femtachi: "Eeeewww! Hell no! You're like . . . not cool with your freakish snake-like face! And you're sooo not cute AT ALL! He sure is!" Points at Kisame
---Silence.
The three guys look at each other oddly---
Itachi:
Suppresses a laugh
"You have GOT to be kidding me! Kisame
cute! Ha-ha!"
Kisame: "And I'm saying you're not sexy"
Itachi: "You're in denial!"
Orochimaru: "Now now, gentlemen. We have a lady in our presence"
Itachi: "Ha-ha! Lady! Prostitute is more like it! Seriously! Look at how she's dressed!"
Femtachi: "You know
you want me!"
Licks
finger, smiling
Kisame: "Mmmm! Now I really want to shave yo-"
---Liiiiiiicckkkkk---
Orochimaru: "Now! That is MY kind of woman!"
Itachi: "Oh god. That's even sicker than when Deidara licked me!"
Kisame: "Did . . . you just LICK ME?!"
Femtachi: Taps
chin
"You taste like
tuna"
Itachi: "That . . . is really sick"
Orochimaru: "Damn! This twin of yours, Itachi, is one damn hot woman!"
Itachi: Gags
"What
the hell are you talking about! I don't even know this
bi-"
Femtachi: Walks
in front of Itachi, bending down to his eye level
"Mmmm
. . . So you really think so, Eh, Macho man?"
---Cue macho man music---
Kisame:
Twitch
"AGGHH!!!!"
Cuts
'CD' player in half
---Music stops---
Femtachi: Pokes
Itachi in the forehead, stepping back just to trip and fall
back
"Aaaiieee!"
Itachi:
Grabs Femtachi's hand,
just to get pulled down 'accidentally,' falling on top of her
"You
klutz"
Kisame: Grins
and lays Samehada on his shoulder
"Now
that is kinky AND hot!"
Orochimaru:
Chuckles
"Agreed!
Let's take a picture!"
Takes
out camera
Itachi: "YOU WOULDN'T DARE!"
Orochimaru: "No, I would!"
Femtachi: "You like me close, eh?"
Itachi: Blankly
stares
"Oh, that's
it!"
Gets off
Femtachi, grabbing her hands, pulling her up
Femtachi:
"Thank yo-mmpf?!"
Widens
eyes
---Note: Itachi
pulled a little too hard, and well, it turned out into a lip
lock--- Orochimaru: Kisame: Itachi:
"Oh my . . . SNAKE! Kisame! Quick! PICTURE!"
Orochimaru: "I must show this to Sasu-chan! He'll be devastated . . . Oh well, what do I care? Let's leave these two face suckers, Kisame"
Kisame: "Yeah, I think I've been scarred enough for the rest of my life"
---Kisame &
Orochimaru walk off stage--- Femtachi:
"Thinking
what I'm thinking?"
Itachi: "Quite possibly.
Lets"
Starts to
walk off and waits silently
Femtachi:
Pulls out fan, her back
towards the Audience, opening it, and turns her head to the
side
"Asta la veista . .
. Baby"
---Both walk off--- ---A few moments
later--- Backstage:
