Disclaimer:
Once upon a time
In a land far far away
I was a fishy.
"Aw man, I have one that tops that!"
It was Thursday night, and April O'Neil was having pizza and beer with the turtles in her apartment. Well, pizza and beer with Raph, Mikey, and Don. Leo had a lemonade.
"No no no, Dude! That's not what she said at all!"
They had been going for a while now; their pizza crusts were long ago chewed, and now they were just sitting around nursing the last of April's beer.
"Hey, you guys remember the guy we saved on the corner of Laird and East? Remember what he called us? I never knew you could do that with cat piss."
They were all a little drunk.
"Don't forget that time when we caught that mugger trying to lose us in the docks. I think he beat Raph on creative swearing and damning."
Save Leo of course. But the guy had relaxed over the last few years, and was sitting back and laughing with them.
"I don't know. That gal we stopped knifing someone when we were 16 had some pretty good names for us."
They were talking about all the people they'd rescued – in one form or another
"Yeah, dude. That was some crazy shit she had coming at us."
It was something else, how they kept helping those who would not thank them for it. Most wouldn't bother to help someone out if it was inconvenient for them. And it always was.
"I seem to remember this one guy we stopped beating on his girlfriend. She turned around and attacked us!"
Like it ever was convenient for the turtles. Hell, they'd been shot, stabbed, drugged, hunted, ambushed, and imprisoned. All of them could lay claim to a portion of death's doorway.
"Was that before or after we busted PD HQ?"
But it didn't stop them from taking out a drug dealer, or jumping a bunch of rapists following some stupid girl home. They'd long ago dropped the dream of becoming welcomed super heroes. Even Mikey stopped looking for The Grateful Citizen on his nightly prowls.
"Remember the Triceriton prison? That one dude tried to make Raph his bitch!"
Laughter.
It seemed like there was the whole universe on one side, and the four of them on the other. What could anyone do against odds like that?
"Yeah, that escape we pulled was pretty sweet though. I wonder if they've updated their cruisers yet."
At least they had each other.
"Man, I can't BELIEVE we got outta that mess with our shells intact!"
But perhaps that did more than just even the odds.
Thanks for Reading!
