A HALLOWEEN OF HOBBITS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF MICHAEL MYERS
Based on characters created by John Carpenter, Debra Hill, and J.R.R. Tolkien
I own nothing, except for the concept of crossing these two series over.
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EXT. HADDONFIELD, IL, OCTOBER 30, 2004, NIGHT: Dr. Joan Loomis tracks down notorious serial killer Michael Myers and cuffs him. The police and wizards from the new Middle Earth psychiatric ward in Shire, England.
LOOMIS: I'm gonna miss you, Michael... I'm gonna miss searching the entire city of Haddonfield for you, beating you senseless to the ground, pretending you're dead just so you can to on another rampage....... Well, Michael, they're moving you to Middle Earth....
(Loomis and the Tolkien-like wizards take Michael Myers to Middle Earth.)
MIDDLE EARTH, OCTOBER 31, 2004, HALLOWEEN, MORNING: In the Tolkien-like land of Shire in the middle of the earth, a bunch of hobbits, wizards, and elves are walking around merrily. Michael Myers is being taken to the nearby Middle Earth sanitarium.
GANDALF: Oh shit....
SAMWISE "SAM" GAMGEE: What is it, Mr. Gandalf?
GANDALF: (Long pause).... Michael Myers......
(Michael Myers jumps out of the ambulence and kills Frodo Baggins. The hobbits, elves, and wizards are runnig for their lives.)
SAM: You son of a bitch.... You killed Mr. Frodo!!!
(The Halloween theme plays in the background. Michael breathes heavily.)
GANDALF: Get away from him, Samwise!! Run away from the Shire and never return until Michael Myers is away from here!!.....
SAM: But who's Michael Myers?....
GANDALF: In 1963, Michael Myers was a six-year-old boy who went into his sister's bedroom and murdered her with a kitchen knife. He was committed to a sanitarium under the care of Sam Loomis..... Fifteen years later, he escaped and found his other sister, Laurie Strode.... A fire that same night put him in a coma for ten years.... In 1988, he awakened to kill Laurie's daughter, Jamie.... In 1989, he found Jamie again, but they were both kidnapped by Dr. Terrence Wynn..... It turns out that Michael belongs to an acient tribe known as Thorn.... He must kill off his entire family to save the tribe.... In 1998, he went to California and tracked down Laurie Strode once again.... But he decapitated him and he was presumed dead.....
SAM: Didn't they do a Dangertainment show on him?
GANDALF: Dangertainment?... Never heard of it.... You must be thinking of Jason or Freddy.... There were only Halloweens 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, and 7. At least we are trying to ignor Halloween: Resurrection in this pointless crossover......
SAM: Whoever is writing this crap sure has a lot of time on his hands. Lord of the Rings and Halloween do not take place in the same time period....
(Michael Myers slowly walks up to Sam and Gandalf. Gandalf strangles Michael, but Michael kicks Gandalf in between the legs. He drops to the ground dead. But Michael decapitates him anyway. Sam is next....)
SAM: Don't kill me, Mr. Myers.... I am only a hobbit! Go bother the Spy Kids, Starsky & Hutch, Air Bud, or the bad guy from the movie Scream. LOTR is New Line; you're Dimension.
(Michael Myers stabs Sam in the heart. He drops to the floor, dead. All of the other hobbits are runnig for their lives....)
GOLLUM: Let's end this pointless crossover before it gets any worse!!!....
(Michale Myers kills Gollum.)
THE END
Based on characters created by John Carpenter, Debra Hill, and J.R.R. Tolkien
I own nothing, except for the concept of crossing these two series over.
----------------
EXT. HADDONFIELD, IL, OCTOBER 30, 2004, NIGHT: Dr. Joan Loomis tracks down notorious serial killer Michael Myers and cuffs him. The police and wizards from the new Middle Earth psychiatric ward in Shire, England.
LOOMIS: I'm gonna miss you, Michael... I'm gonna miss searching the entire city of Haddonfield for you, beating you senseless to the ground, pretending you're dead just so you can to on another rampage....... Well, Michael, they're moving you to Middle Earth....
(Loomis and the Tolkien-like wizards take Michael Myers to Middle Earth.)
MIDDLE EARTH, OCTOBER 31, 2004, HALLOWEEN, MORNING: In the Tolkien-like land of Shire in the middle of the earth, a bunch of hobbits, wizards, and elves are walking around merrily. Michael Myers is being taken to the nearby Middle Earth sanitarium.
GANDALF: Oh shit....
SAMWISE "SAM" GAMGEE: What is it, Mr. Gandalf?
GANDALF: (Long pause).... Michael Myers......
(Michael Myers jumps out of the ambulence and kills Frodo Baggins. The hobbits, elves, and wizards are runnig for their lives.)
SAM: You son of a bitch.... You killed Mr. Frodo!!!
(The Halloween theme plays in the background. Michael breathes heavily.)
GANDALF: Get away from him, Samwise!! Run away from the Shire and never return until Michael Myers is away from here!!.....
SAM: But who's Michael Myers?....
GANDALF: In 1963, Michael Myers was a six-year-old boy who went into his sister's bedroom and murdered her with a kitchen knife. He was committed to a sanitarium under the care of Sam Loomis..... Fifteen years later, he escaped and found his other sister, Laurie Strode.... A fire that same night put him in a coma for ten years.... In 1988, he awakened to kill Laurie's daughter, Jamie.... In 1989, he found Jamie again, but they were both kidnapped by Dr. Terrence Wynn..... It turns out that Michael belongs to an acient tribe known as Thorn.... He must kill off his entire family to save the tribe.... In 1998, he went to California and tracked down Laurie Strode once again.... But he decapitated him and he was presumed dead.....
SAM: Didn't they do a Dangertainment show on him?
GANDALF: Dangertainment?... Never heard of it.... You must be thinking of Jason or Freddy.... There were only Halloweens 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, and 7. At least we are trying to ignor Halloween: Resurrection in this pointless crossover......
SAM: Whoever is writing this crap sure has a lot of time on his hands. Lord of the Rings and Halloween do not take place in the same time period....
(Michael Myers slowly walks up to Sam and Gandalf. Gandalf strangles Michael, but Michael kicks Gandalf in between the legs. He drops to the ground dead. But Michael decapitates him anyway. Sam is next....)
SAM: Don't kill me, Mr. Myers.... I am only a hobbit! Go bother the Spy Kids, Starsky & Hutch, Air Bud, or the bad guy from the movie Scream. LOTR is New Line; you're Dimension.
(Michael Myers stabs Sam in the heart. He drops to the floor, dead. All of the other hobbits are runnig for their lives....)
GOLLUM: Let's end this pointless crossover before it gets any worse!!!....
(Michale Myers kills Gollum.)
THE END
