Title: Fix
Author: MegTDJ
Category: Fluff/romance
Rating: PG
Pairing: McKay/Weir
Spoilers: None
Summary: Rodney needs his coffee. To what lengths would he go to get it?
Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis, its universe and its characters are not mine. The story itself is, however, so please don't archive without my permission.

Author's notes: This one is Misty's fault as well! She's a very good influence on my muse. ;)

Many thanks to Misty and Julie for the constant McWeir inspiration. You guys are awesome! And have good taste. ;)

For Azar and Angelsgracie, who seemed in need of a pick-me-up.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Fix

Every limb in Rodney's body was aching as he slowly changed into his civilian clothes. It had been a long day. Actually, it felt like it had been a long week since he'd gotten out of bed that morning. Why they'd traversed that frozen planet on foot rather than take a puddle jumper he would never understand.

He donned his warmest sweater over his usual sweatshirt, but he still didn't seem to be warming up. He started to miss the cozy warmth of a crackling fire blazing away in an old-fashioned fireplace. What he wouldn't give for that now.

With a heavy sigh, he dragged his aching bones out of his quarters, heading in the direction of the mess hall. He could feel his blood sugar dropping lower and lower with each passing second, so even though his body was screaming for sleep, food must come first.

And coffee. Lots and lots of delicious, steaming hot coffee. If that didn't warm him up, nothing would.

He hurried through the hallways, walking as fast as his leaden legs would allow and not stopping for anyone or anything along the way. His mind was sorting through all of the possible snacks that might be waiting for him in the mess hall, and which one he would choose if he were forced to make a decision. That had never been an easy thing for him to do - choose one snack over another. Cake or pie? Chips or popcorn? Pretzels or peanuts? It was just impossible.

Not that they really had that kind of problem here on Atlantis. You basically had to take whatever the chef cooked up or go hungry here. Not that Rodney minded. Food was food, and at least that meant he didn't have to stand there for half an hour trying to decide.

One thing he never had a problem deciding on, however, was coffee. Boy, was he looking forward to it now.

No one much was in the mess hall when he finally arrived, so he went straight over to the food counter. The best thing on the menu seemed to be some kind of bean dish, so Rodney helped himself to a bowlful and made his way over to the coffee machine.

At least, he went over to the place where the coffee machine used to be.

"What happened to the coffee machine?" Rodney asked into the air.

"Didn't anyone tell you, Dr. McKay?" some airman or other said from a table nearby. "We've been running low for a while now. I guess it's finally all gone."

Rodney spun around to stare at the man in open-mouthed horror. "Gone?! How can it possibly be gone?!"

The airman seemed to blanch a little at Rodney's irate tone. "I... I guess it's just been so long since we made contact with Earth that our supplies are starting to run out... Sir. I hear they've found some sort of coffee bean on the mainland, though, and they're going to give that a try..."

"Alien coffee?!?!?!" Rodney cried. "Oh, no no no no, I don't think so. I've gotta have a word with Elizabeth about this." With that, he marched straight out of the mess hall and made a beeline for her office.

The chill he had already been feeling grew ten times worse at the thought of no more coffee. He'd known their supplies were running out, but surely they'd taken enough coffee to last them a few years? How could it all have run out so quickly? Didn't they realize that the majority of people in this city needed coffee in order to live? Didn't they realize that he needed coffee to keep his brain functioning at genius level?!

How could an entire planet possibly run out of coffee?!

He was seeing red by the time he arrived at Elizabeth's office. He didn't even bother to knock - he just barged right in and demanded, "What happened to all the coffee?"

Elizabeth stared at him in dumb surprise. She was sitting at her desk with a stack of paperwork in front of her, and in her hand she held...

A coffee mug.

Rodney glared at her and pointed an accusing finger at the mug. "What is that?"

Elizabeth blinked and looked at the object in her hand as though she'd never seen it before. "It's a mug."

"Yes, I can see that. What's in it?"

Elizabeth shrugged. "It's coffee," she replied nonchalantly. Then she did the unthinkable - she raised the mug to her lips, threw her head back, and emptied the last of the mug's contents into her mouth.

And swallowed.

Rodney tried to speak, but it came out as a strangled squeak. He couldn't believe what he had just witnessed. The last of the coffee... gone. Drained down to the last drop right before his very own eyes.

He felt like he was going to pass out.

"Rodney, are you alright?" Elizabeth asked. She actually sounded concerned, the little schemer. She rose from her chair and started towards him, and Rodney was sure it was so he would have to smell the remnants of his beloved beverage on her breath. She was rubbing it in, there was no doubt about it.

"Do you know what you've done?" he said, unable to raise his voice to anything above a menacing whisper.

"What I've done?" Elizabeth asked, her pretty little forehead crinkled in what could only be described as confusion. Oh, she was a good bluffer, alright. He should have known.

"You took the last of it, didn't you?" he said, edging towards her.

"The last of... the coffee?" She seemed nervous now, backing away from him as he slowly drew closer and closer. "I did finish off the pot, yes. I'm sorry, did you want some?"

"Did I want some?" Rodney repeated in disbelief. "Did I want some?! Do you have any idea what kind of day I've had? All I wanted was a nice little snack and a warm cup of coffee, and I find that it's all gone! All of it! Gone! Forever! And you took the last of it?!"

"Rodney, what are you talking about? Why are you looking at me like that? Do I have to call security in h..."

She got no further. Before she had a chance to get away, Rodney grabbed her face in his hands and kissed her.

Oh yes, he kissed her. And not just a friendly peck on the lips, either. She'd stolen his last hope of ever getting a cup of coffee again, so the least she could do was allow him to taste it. If that meant sticking his tongue down her throat, then so be it.

He expected her to put up some kind of fight, but to his surprise and delight, she didn't. She seemed stunned and even a little frightened at first, but then with a soft little moan, she wrapped her arms around him and started giving as good as she got.

Suddenly, Rodney forgot that he was supposed to be tasting the coffee. Elizabeth tasted better than any old bean ever could, and by God did she ever have the ability to warm him up. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew that as soon as he could think clearly again, he was definitely going to add "Elizabeth's kisses" to his list of "must haves in order to survive." She was simply amazing.

After a minute or so, they finally parted and stood there with their arms around each other, gasping for breath. Rodney was just about to lean in for another round, when Elizabeth spoke.

"I guess I should take the last of every pot from now on."

Rodney almost smiled at this, but then he realized that something didn't sound quite right. "Every... pot?" he said. "No, that was the last of it. The coffee machine is gone. We've run out."

Elizabeth laughed. "Don't be silly, Rodney," she said, lightly swatting his arm. "There's a whole other crate full of it that hasn't even been opened yet. Chef just wanted to give the machine a good clean."

At this announcement, Rodney's legs felt like they were going to give out on him. "Oh, thank God," he breathed.

Then he realized where he was and what he'd just done.

"Uh... you're, uh... are you... you're not mad about this, are you?" he asked tentatively.

Elizabeth seemed quite amused about this. "Do I look mad?" she asked.

Good question. "Not particularly," Rodney answered, lowering his arms to encircle her waist.

"Then I guess I'm not," she said. "Just do one thing for me, okay?"

"What's that?"

"If you ever need a caffeine fix again... come to me first. I'd be happy to help."

Rodney grinned. "I think I can do that," he said.

Elizabeth giggled as he kissed her again. Rodney couldn't help but consider it the perfect ending to his not-so-perfect day.

THE END