Title: Mid-Song
Rating: PG 13 for language
Fandom: One Tree Hill
Pairing/Characters: Lucas/Peyton, via Brooke & Peyton talking
Warnings: Spoilers to Ep 4x09. Angst
Summary: Peyton and Brooke deal with the aftermath after the State Championship.
Word Count: 707
AN: This is the first thing I've written in days. I don't think it's that good but I just got done watching all of season 3 and 4 that's aired and I feel like crap and wanted to try writing.
Silence had never been an issue between them but now it stretched over the distance like a tangible thing. She hated it. More than she hated the way things had been between them since she laid her truth out for the world to see or at least for Brooke to see. Usually she filled up that silence with a great band that could take her back to good memories but now it was just fitting.
Silence and distance.
She glanced at Brooke out of the corner of her eye. Her best friend, or former best friend, whatever; was watching as the town passed them by. This little town with its drama and too-many Scotts to worm their way into your heart. This little town where some people loved basketball more than their families and others hated it with that same passion. This little town where she'd grown up, been left alone and fallen in love. This little town where she'd lost her best friend and found a new family. This little fucking town.
Was it any wonder she had commitment issues?
Her mom, her dad, Jake, Ellie, Derek … people always leave but not him, never him. Lucas was never supposed to leave.
"I saw you and Lucas at the game," Brooke starts and Peyton feels that tugging at her soul that reminded her of all the things she'd lost with Brooke.
"Brooke …" but she doesn't know what to say. She can't apologize, more over she won't. You can't help who you love and she'd been willing to back off, she'd just wanted Brooke to know so she didn't make all the same mistakes again. Peyton could understand why her friend had been so angry but at the same time she couldn't. If she thought back far enough, back to the beginning, Brooke had known how she felt about Lucas and she'd gone after him anyway.
It wasn't like she thought turnabout was fair play and really she'd never meant for all of that to happen and she'd certainly never wanted to be so in love with Lucas that it invaded every inch of her heart, body, mind and soul.
"He said you Peyton," Brooke's head turns and Peyton glances from her friend to the road and back and forth. "I asked him and he said you."
The hospital loomed in front of them and she parked the car looking up fearfully. God. She hated this place, where her mother died and so many bad memories just permeated every inch of it. The fact that Lucas was here, again, made her stomach churn and her heart ache and she didn't know if she could go in there. He couldn't leave her, not now, not ever.
She looked at Brooke, "I never wanted this you know for you to hate me so much but I can't help that I …"
"I know. I love him too you know, I'm just not in love with him anymore. It's never going to be okay," Brooke's eyes are wet and it breaks her heart nearly as much as the thought of walking out of that hospital and going to another funeral. He can't leave. Neither can Haley.
Lucas and Haley had changed all their lives. God, without them.
"I know," she nods and pulls of her seat belt, "I don't know if I can go in there Brooke."
A single tear slips down her face and she wipes it away angrily. It's strange to be sitting here with Brooke after over a month of near silence, snide remarks, pain and watching her friend slip away.
"You have to, he needs you, Nathan needs you, Haley needs you. And I need you Peyton. It's never going to be okay Peyton but that doesn't mean things aren't going to work out. We haven't all gone through all this crap for everything to end now. Now get your slutty ass out of this car and come into the hospital with me."
She manages a tiny laugh and a smile before getting out of her car with a deep sigh and the shuddering fear coiling in her stomach.
He's the one person who is not allowed to leave. They can't end Mid-Song.
