Disclaimer: I do not own characters or settings from Degrassi. Just the stuff between the proper nouns.

While You Were Sleeping

The kisses are so sweet. A little sloppy, granted, but at last I am loved. Someone…he…Craig cares enough about me to touch my face softly with the back of his hand. To gaze deeply into my eyes. To stroke my hair. And kiss me…

Firmly on the lips and I can feel the roughness of chapped skin. The tip of his tongue searchingly parts lips, probes inside. I shift my head and our teeth knock. I'm embarrassed. He just smiles. Then lowers his face back to mine, his breath warm and wet on my cheek. Then comes inside for more. Deeper. His tongue expands. My throat is for the taking.

I had no idea that kisses were battles. But I armour my own tongue, fight back. Hesitant at first waiting to be told I'm wrong, but our tongues roll together; his responds. I run my tongue on the ridge of his mouth. I'm pleased he delivers a shiver. Then rolls me on my back with a leg between mine and his tongue tickles my throat once again.

Oh great, I feel it coming on, a tickle to a cough. I retch a little but he doesn't stop. I'm embarrassed but I have to shove him off. Then I cough and cough and cough.

Um, are you okay? he says, concerned.

I'm fine, I hack. I force a smile.

So embarrassed, horrified. He passes a bottle of water. The liquid soothes my bothered throat and I quickly replace the lid. I'm eager to get back to battle. I thrust the bottle away and grab him, pulling him down hard, back into my mouth.

Momentarily, he breaks away, and examines me thoughtfully from above. God, you're beautiful; his murmur is warm. A quick searing kiss and his head lifts again. Make love to me, Manny. I want you.

My heart hammers hard; that kisses were battle I just had not known. My body ached up inside, but I just learned of kisses! Too much for one night; just one step at a time. Part of me wants it but – No, I mew. I hang my head, Sorry. I'm not ready for that.

Then just stay the night with me. I want you near.

Happily, I nod, snuggle up to his body. For at last I am loved. I am loved…

Groggily, strangely, I awake in the night. My back is turned to Craig and I can see no light. I swallow back my breath in panic – what is going on? Down on that place of ache and warmth a finger probes the surface. The finger wiggles back and forth. It's hard and it's persistent. I lie quietly, perfectly still, and make my breath deep like I'm sleeping. Sometimes a jolt of what's supposed to be pleasure?, and other times nothing but slippery searching. I shut my eyes tightly, bite down on my tongue. Someone else is touching me in a place I didn't know I had. Someone else is touching me while I'm supposedly asleep. Someone else is – what's going on? This someone else is Craig.

Minutes pass; I don't know, maybe it's hours. But I show no response and he finally gives up. He slides his finger out of my underwear, his hand from out of my pants. He removes his arm from around my waist. He turns so his back is toward me, space between us.

I tremble. And I sleep no more.