This was a Shiorrachan challenge!


Chapter 1: The Dare

"Oh, this is some damn good bacon," Naruto moaned, his appreciation for the sizzling meat in the frying pan clearly expressed on his face. "You don't see bacon like this everyday," the blonde went on, before shooting his best friend and roommate, Sasuke, a dark, accusing look. "Especially on the days when you cook! I swear, it's like you have a vendetta against bacon!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes and sneered playfully,"Its not my fault that my cooking skills are too good for peasant food like bacon." Naruto sputtered indignantly and waved the greasy spatula threateningly in the air.

"P-Peasant food? Says the man who begged me to come room with him because he couldn't pay the rent?" the blonde managed after a moment.

"Well... it wasn't my fault that dad cut me off... stupid bastard. I only bought a few cars. It's not the end of the world..." Sasuke grumbled, pushing the salt and pepper shakers absently across the countertop. He eyed the bacon hungrily. It was no secret, for all Sasuke's talk, that bacon was his favorite food next to tomatoes.

"Stop checkin' out my bacon," Naruto demanded in a scandalized tone. "It's downright perverted, the way you're looking at my bacon! I say! The way your eyes are scanning my bacon right now-"

"Stop speaking about your bacon as if it's a part of your body, dobe! I just wanna know when I can get a piece," Sasuke shot back, peering into the frying pan hungrily.

"You're not getting any-" Naruto's statement was cut off when Sasuke grabbed a fork and stabbed a perfectly fried strip of meat. "BACON RAPE!" the blonde screamed, batting at Sasuke's hand with the spatula! Not about to let Naruto reclaim the bacon, Sasuke stuffed the entire strip into his mouth.

The two friends dissolved into laughter even as Naruto continued to swat his dark haired friend with the greasy spatula.

"Oi, don't get me all greasy! I, unlike you, happen to like being clean!" Sasuke smirked through his laughter as he talked around the food in his mouth. Grinning Naruto promptly stuck his hand in a day old pan of bacon grease and proceeded to wipe his hand all over the Uchiha's face. Sasuke spluttered in shock and glared at Naruto, his mouth full of bacon tasting grease.

"You!" he growled as Naruto dissolved into hysterics.

The sound of Sasuke's phone jangling saved Naruto's skin from hellish retaliation, as far as Sasuke was concerned. The dark haired male fished his phone from the back pocket and proceeded to check the text message that had just come in.

"Ooooh, lookie there," Naruto crowed in a sing-song voice. "Yet another cancel! You are really on a roll, here, it seems!" Unfortunately for Sasuke, Naruto was right. He really was on a roll. Girls had been cancelling on him left, right and centre.

"At least I have dates to get canceled, you freakin' hermit!" Sasuke snapped. "Besides, it's good for my image, I'm supposed to be a jerk."

"Uh right," Naruto grinned, his blue eyes full of mirth, then he sighed dramatically and waved his hand in the air. "Tsk, tsk, you will never get married at this rate Sasuke-chan, just look at you! Canceled dates and unable to cook bacon!"

"What the fuck? I will SO get married one day! And who said i wanted to get married anyway!" Sasuke sputtered indignantly, his face reddening. Still, he knew he was ignoring the fact that Itachi had said the exact same thing to him. But it could just be that both his older brother and Naruto were infected by the same disease of stupidity. Most likely that was the answer. He could so get married if he wanted to. It was just that he didn't. Besides, he was only twenty-one! He still had a couple years left of blessed bachelorhood. His stunning good looks weren't going anywhere anytime soon!

"Is that so?" Naruto drawled, his infuriatingly smug grin growing wider. "Well in that case get your proposal accepted by a girl in six months or no bacon for the rest of your life!"

"What kind of bat shit dare is that?" Sasuke asked, scowling.

"Clean bat shit, fresh out of the bat, too," the blonde smirked, trying to hold in his laughter at the shocked expression on Sasuke's face. "Also," the blonde continued, sending Sasuke a telling look. "You're forgetting who is the most loved in the entire university we attend. I can have your bacon banned from every establishment within seventy miles if I set my mind to it..." Naruto threatened. Sasuke paled.

This was no empty threat!

"Che, fine, fine!" he growled grumpily, looking rather like a toddler about to stamp its foot. "But what's in it for me if I win, apart from the chick?" Naruto wiggled his eyebrows in response.

"Oh, you know I'll make it worth your while..." the blonde promised, grinning from ear to ear. "Now shake on the deal. There is no backing out of this!"


"Hinata!" Sakura yelled, causing the meek Hyuuga to jump, dropping the colourful blocks that she had been packing up as her shift at the daycare ended.

"Y-yes?" she stuttered, spinning around to face and irate Sakura, who had her hands jammed on her fists. Her pink-haired boss's green eyes glinting with affectionate annoyance.

"Its Friday for goodness sake! Go home already and get laid or something!" the pinkette said, her green eyes flashing. Hinata blushed heavily and looked down at her feet.

"U-um there isn't really anyone at the moment." Sakura blinked at her for a span of probably four seconds.

"Thats enough! You're smokin' hot and beautiful! You shouldn't be stuck at a daycare centre at seven in the evening when there are studs out there to jump! When there are manly stud muffins with abs to blindside and drag into your candlelit lair!" the pinkette said firmly, gesturing dramatically with her arms.

"B-but I don't really know how to ask..." Hinata trailed miserably, hugging a stray block to her chest. She tucked a strand of hair - that had fallen from her messy bun - behind her ear.

"Well I can help with that," Sakura smirked evilly, now was the perfect time to instigate her side of the plan she and Naruto had formed. "You get someone to propose to you in six months or I will fire your Hyuuga ass from this daycare centre! Hell you don't even need the money!" Hinata gaped in shock, her mind trying desperately to catch up with her pink haired boss'.

"B-But I love the kids," she wailed miserably.

"Exactly!" the pinkette exclaimed. "And to get kids of your own, you have to jump someone's bones! I refuse to have you here, perfectly beautiful and childless, for the rest of time! Most certainly not when I have my kids and have nasty stretch marks across my stomach! No, you shall be defiled with me!" the pinkette continued swiftly, knowing that speaking loudly and swiftly was a surefire way to confuse the dark haired Hyuuga.

"I... I don't think-" Hinata started.

"EXACTLY!" Sakura continued excitedly. "Don't think! That's the spirit, Hinata-chan! Just find a cute guy that isn't a serial killer, and make him fall in love with you!"

"B-but, I don't really know anyone..." the brunette continued to stall.

"Exactly!" the pinkette went on, really winging it but not allowing Hinata to talk her way out of the dare. A lot was riding on this! Currently, the betting pool in the university was already over seven hundred thousand ryo... because the person that was lined up for Hinata happened to be extremely popular, but in a way that the university girls were willing to foist off on poor unsuspecting Hinata.

"E-Exactly?" Hinata asked in confusion.

"Excactly!" Sakura confirmed, nodding her head emphatically. "Because," she went on, sliding a pale arm over Hinata's cardigan covered shoulders. "Since you don't know anyone, all the males in Konoha are ripe for the picking! And, if you like, you can even go abroad! Those Iwa hunks are all so tanned and muscular and gorgeous! Or even the Suna men... desert hunks you can eat for dessert! Not to mention those long-haired stud muffins from Oto, or the frost dwelling eskimo types from Yuki... the possibilities are endless!" she finished, staring off at a random spot and waving her hand in the air for emphasis and effect.

"U-um I think I will stick with Konoha!" Hinata squeaked feeling slightly dizzy as Sakura began to to get carried away in her manly fantasies.

"Oh so you accept the challenge then?" Sakura grinned triumphantly and Hinata groaned; the pinkette had backed her into a corner.

"Umm... I-I guess?" she mumbled. Unfortunately, it was loud enough for Sakura to hear.

"Yosh!" the pinkette shouted, doing a little happy dance. "Hinata's gonna get some! Uh! Uh! Oh yeah, oh baby!" Sakura spun to face Hinata. "Oh, you have made me so happy! I am going off to write up the legal documents for this now!" she squealed before skipping off to her office and leaving a stunned and terrified Hinata in her wake.

What the hell had she gotten herself into?

In a couple of minutes, Sakura rushed back into the entrance area and shoved the papers into Hinata's hands, grinning happily.

"Your signature please!"

"A-Ano..." Hinata mumbled, staring at the papers in sheer terror. She had NO idea how to talk to boys, much less get one to propose to her! And now, this horrid dare stood between her and a life filled with children at the daycare. Though she supposed what Sakura said was true.

The thought alone brought bright red surging up her cheeks. If she wanted children of her own, she'd have to... She'd have to... with a man, she'd have to... She was pathetic. She couldn't even bring herself to think the thought through! And Sakura fully expected her to do the actual action! But on the other hand, deep down, she didn't really want to die a childless old maid, and at the rate she was going, it would be inevitable if she didn't take this dare. So the shy Hyuuga squared her shoulders and began the arduous task of signing the papers.

And there were a lot of them.

"Make sure not to read the fine print," Sakura said quietly, almost as if she were talking to herself, but Hinata heard the words anyway. The fine print? There was fine print? She jerked one of the papers closer to her face to read the fine print that was indeed there, but Sakura yanked the papers from her hands with record speed and sprinted away to the office with them.

Hinata was positive her boss left a dust trail, but that was most likely her in otaku mode again. She hadn't got to read the fine print, but she had a feeling she wouldn't like it.

Sakura did not come back out of her office, so Hinata was left standing at the front of the daycare centre wondering what the heck she was supposed to do. Six months was not exactly a large amount of time. Not for her, anyway.

Grabbing her large leather purse, Hinata pulled on her jacket and beanie and let herself out. She would never get through this, she thought, as she waited at the bus stop. There were three guys from the college talking loudly right next to her, but not one of them sent even a glance her way. Hinata shrunk in the corner of the bus stop and looked anxiously for the bus. She was feeling like she should be doing something, but she didn't know what to do and she just felt more uncomfortable than ever.

The bus finally drove up, and Hinata was already standing by the time it drew close and stopped. She sent a small smile to the conductor after paying and found a seat in the back of the bus. It was like the universe was trying to prove a point to her, because two guys sat down next to her, but didn't so much as glance her way. Sighing, Hinata snuggled deeper into her warm jacket and pulled out her phone. She inserted her earphones and proceeded to listen to some music. But when she turned her head away to look out the window she didn't see the two guys blatantly ogling her. And the earphones in her ears shrouded their words in a fog of a heavy metal bass.

"Girls like that don't look at guys like us, dude," one of them said morosely to the other.

"Don't stop us from looking at them though," the second of the two men said a little wistfully.


Sakura made sure that Hinata was out of sight before she pulled out her phone and speed dialed Naruto, a triumphant smile on her lips.

"Wassup, Sakura-chan?" Naruto answered cheerfully, causing Sakura to blush a little.

"Operation Hyuuga/Uchiha is underway from my side!" the pinkette smirked into the phone and then both she and Naruto burst into laughter.

"Hehe, I got Sasuke too, he won't even know what hit him when he falls for Hinata!"

"You think?!" Sakura grinned happily, feeling quite proud of her accomplishments.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I can't wait to see everything in motion," Naruto said, his voice muffled for a moment. There was shuffling on the other side of the line. "Mnn... What's the latest figure in the pools?" Naruto asked, sounding a little distracted.

"Last time it was a little over seven hundred thousand ryo. The entire university is slowly getting involved in this," Sakura giggled. There was the jangle of a belt buckle on the other side of the line.

"Shit, that's a lot of money," Naruto said. The phone fell. Sakura frowned at the sound. "'Lo? You there still?" Naruto asked.

"Uh... yeah," Sakura said slowly. "What the hell is going on?"

"Sorry..." Naruto chuckled. "I was getting undressed and the bloody phone fell," he explained, completely unaware of the effect his words had on Sakura.

"Well why are you-"

"Shit," Naruto said, cutting her off. "Sasuke's back. I gotta go. I'll call you later tonight? Or we can get together somehow?"

"Umm... sure," Sakura agreed readily, her heart fluttering a little in her chest.

"Alright. I'll see you later then," Naruto said softly before hanging up.


"Who was that?" Sasuke asked, one dark brow raised.

"What you jealous? I got a booty call," Naruto quipped, reaching for another pair of jeans and an orange and grey hoodie. He tugged on his favorite chain and sat on the edge of his bed, reaching for his converse.

"Me, jealous? Pffft," Sasuke snorted. "I'm heading back out myself," the raven continued. "Don't wait up."

Fifteen minutes later, Sasuke was waiting to catch a bus into Konoha town. He bounded aboard the bus when it stopped and moved to a seat in the back that had just been vacated. The seat next to his was occupied by a cute, shapely brunette that- Wait, was that Hinata? Hyuuga Neji's younger cousin? He'd seen her around from time to time, and even in those select times, he'd found it hard not to ogle her. She wasn't the type to be attracted to him though, was she?

However, he had a responsibility. He had to win someone, for his precious bacon.

He turned to her.

"Hey."


Oh dear. Whatever will happen next? Review! Give Shiorrachan and Taymore sum love! hwehwehwe ;p