Chapter 1: Destiny is Never Left to Chance
"We stopped looking for monsters under our beds when we realized those monsters were inside us."
-Joker
I slammed my cuffed hands on the table, infuriated. "This is outrageous!"
The old woman in front of me didn't seem to be affected by my outburst. She glared up at me from her seat behind the desk, hands folded neatly, back straight, and head high, as if she was looking down on a piece of dirt. Mrs. Bensa sighed. "Calm down, you silly little child! You've no idea what a wonderful opportunity like this means." She spat. "Besides, it's not your decision. I've already accepted the deal." My jaw dropped.
"I'm sixteen! I'm perfectly capable of making my own choices!"
"You're a child with absolutely no self control. What makes you think I trust you to make any kind of decision?"
I gritted my teeth, restraining myself from breaking her neck. "You're not my mother. I don't have to do anything you say!" The old bat adjusted her glasses, "Well, your mother isn't here to raise you, now is she? And since your father isn't here either, it's up to me to set you on the good path." Knowing she was right, but too angry to care, I slammed my hands on the table again, harder than the first time. "I don't care who you are!" I said, "I'm not going to that damn company, and you can't make me." Mrs. Bensa smirked, obviously hiding something. She sat back, looking at me with smug amusement. "As of now, you're property of the ShinRa Electric Power Company. Because of this, you're required to go; if you don't, everything you own will be taken away from you, and you'll end up here again." I hesitated at this. I really didn't want to go to ShinRa, for more reasons than one. But I also didn't want to stay here anymore. Who knows. Maybe ShinRa'll have more than this old hole. I sighed, stepping back. Mrs. Bensa didn't hide her joy, and jumped up to grab the phone on her desk. "Excellent! I'll call the Director. Go say your goodbyes, and fix yourself up a little."
I turned and walked to the door, still angry. The guard opened it and ushered me into the hallway, keeping a hand on his taser as he lead me back to the other kids. I was considered a bit more dangerous than the other orphans, hence the handcuffs and guard. After six small fires, four attacks against Mrs. Bensa, and two guards getting jumped, they finally decided to cuff me whenever I walked down the hallway. The last time I jumped a guard, Mrs. Bensa made me wear a straight jacket for a month, which was why I wasn't beating the crap out of her.
I wasn't the best kid.
Don't get me wrong, it's not like Mrs. Bensa abused us or anything; she actually cared about us. She made sure we were clothed and fed properly, had enough space to play and move around, and even hired tutors to teach us during the school year. The old bat never yelled unless it was at me or she was scolding someone. I just didn't like her controlling ways, and she didn't like me at all.
When we finally reached the doors to the indoor playground, the guard uncuffed me and lightly pushed me in. I glared at him, rubbing my wrist as the door closed. There were few teens who lived in the Costa del Sol Home for Lost Children, me being the oldest at sixteen. A small group of kids ran up to me, being lead by a taller kid who was a little older than them. The older one nodded to me. "What'd you get called in for, Snow?" I shook my head, stuffing my hands in my pockets. "I'm movin' out, Kid." Gasps went through the small group.
"What?"
"How come?!"
"But you can't leave!"
I just shook my head and shrugged. There wasn't anything I could do. Kid looked me, slightly worried. "They're right, Snow. You can't leave us now. Who's gonna keep that bully Rue away from us?" I glanced over at a group of older kids across the room. They were only two years younger than me and one year older than Kid, but they thought they ran the place. One of the younger girls who tagged along with Kid walked up to me. "Can't you just run away like last time?" All I could do was shake my head. "Not this time. The old bat gave me to ShinRa to fight in the Wutai War." Kid's eyes widen, and he stepped forward, grabbing my shoulders. "Snow, you can't go! You'll die!" I grinned at him, "No I won't! Jeez, have some faith, will you?" When he didn't answer, I spoke more seriously. "Look, Kid. I'll be fine. You just worry about protectin' these little kids, alright? I'll talk to Rue; he won't bug you for a while. Okay?" Kid nodded silently and I walked across the room, heading straight for Rue's gang.
The fourteen year old glared at me as I walked up to him. "What do you want?" He spat. I crossed my arms, tilting my head. "I'm going away for a while, and while I'm gone, you better not touch those kids." He straightened up, the other kids in his little gang watching me warily. "So she finally kicked you out, huh? What makes you think I'll listen to you, punk?" Fed up with his little attitude, I reached over and grabbed the front of his shirt, yanking him closer to me. Rue tensed, but didn't move away, his hands in his pockets. "Listen, you little brat," I said dangerously, feeling my anger rise up, "If I get one call from Kid saying you've been messing with them, I'm coming straight back and I'm kicking your ass, got it?" Rue didn't answer, and I yanked him forward, to where our nose almost touched. "Got it?!" I said loudly. He gritted his teeth and pulled something from his pocket, quickly bringing his arm up. I leaned back, feeling metal scratch my cheek, and looked at the shank in his hand, blood dripping from the blade. "Go die!" Rue yelled, swinging his shank again. Rage pitted in my stomach, and I slammed him into the floor, grabbing the shank. Staring down at him, I twirled the shank in my hand. "I'll keep this." His little gang stepped forward, but Rue sat up and said, "Stand back. The guards are here for her."
I turned and saw the guards waving me over. Giving Rue one last look, I walked towards them, stuffing the shank in my pocket. Kid ran up to me, worry lacing his words. "Your face is bleeding!" I snorted, grinning at him. "Thanks, Captain Obvious. I'm fine." Glancing at the guards, I said, "Well, I guess I'll see you guys later." Kid suddenly wrapped his arms around my waist, making me almost lose my balance.
"H-hey now-!"
"Be careful, Snow." He looked up at me. "We'll be waiting here, alright?"
I sighed as he pulled away, and reached over to ruffle his hair. "Jeez, I'm not going away forever! If you ever need me, just call. I'll be there!"
Kid nodded and stepped back. I was about to walk out the door when he called my name. Looking back at him, my vision was suddenly obscured as something hit my face. Reaching up, I grabbed the black beanie Kid always wore. I heard Kid laugh. "With hair as weird as yours, you'll need it!" He laughed. I rolled my eyes and put on the beanie. "Ha ha. Dork." Smiling, I turned and went out into the hallway, where I was handcuffed.
Mrs. Bensa frowned when she saw the blood on my cheek. She gasped and hurried over to me, knowing that the ShinRa guys were watching. "Oh, my! What happened, dear? Are you alright?" I shrugged her off, still handcuffed. "Get off, old hag!" Mrs. Bensa sighed and turned to a man with long silver hair. "Snow, I'd like you to say hi to Mr. Sephiroth. He's taken the time to come pick you up! Isn't that nice?" I glared at the General, not even bothering to speak. The old bat laughed nervously and tried to cover my silence. "She's a bit shy, you see. And just so sweet! Isn't that right, dear?" Before I could bite her head off, Sephiroth spoke. "You should know SOLDIER only takes men into the program. A girl won't suffice." Mrs. Bensa faltered, trying to make up an excuse when my anger fired up again.
"What do you mean, 'only takes males'? Why can't a girl join?"
Sephiroth wasn't bothered by my tone. "The mako is too strong. A girl will die before making SOLDIER." I scoffed, glaring at him harder. "You're bluffing. I bet if ShinRa wasn't so sexist, there'd be more women in the army!" Mrs. Bensa opened her mouth to shut me up, but was interrupted by another voice, coming from the ShinRa helicopter.
"Hahaha! She's a fiesty one, huh?" A teenage boy laughed as he stepped down from the chopper. He was dressed similarly to Sephiroth, but wore purple. Sephiroth sighed, "Zack. I told you to stay put." Zack shrugged walking over. "I know, I know! I just couldn't help but want to see what the fuss was about." He smiled at me. I huffed and looked away. Mrs. Bensa glanced between the two SOLDIERs nervously. "I'm so sorry about her behavior," She said quickly, "I've tried to raise her right, but she's very stubborn-"
"It's fine." Sephiroth said, shocking both Mrs. Bensa and I.
"It is?" We said, giving him a look.
The General nodded, crossing his arm. "She may be uncontrolled, but we can discipline her if necessary. Her determination can come in handy if she survives the mako." Mrs. Bensa smiled brightly at this. "That's wonderful! I'm so happy for you, Snow!" I rolled my eyes. "You're just happy to see me go." She ignored this and lightly pushed me forward. "I'm sure you'll be taken care of. I hope you live happily!" Sephiroth stayed behind to speak with Mrs. Bensa about any medical information and to sign papers while Zack led me to the helicopter.
I frowned, wondering how I would get inside since my hands were cuffed behind my back. Zack grinned at me as he hopped up. "Need some help?" I made a face. "No thanks." Ignoring the suppressed laughter from him, I struggled to board the chopper. After several attempts, with no progress at all, I huffed and glared at the helicopter, willing it to lower to the ground. Zack, who was holding his sides as he laughed repeated, "Need help?" I sighed and nodded, looking away as he reached down and wrapped his arms around my waist, lifting me up and setting me down on the floor of the helicopter. "There," He said, "that wasn't so bad, was it?" I didn't answer, instead looking back at the home I had spent most of my life in. I saw Sephiroth talking to Mrs. Bensa, who didn't look happy.
"Hey, where are you from, anyway?"
I looked over at Zack, who sat across from me. "Why?" I asked. He shrugged, resting his cheek on the palm of his hand. "I don't know. You don't look like you're from Costa del Sol." I hesitated, unsure if I should tell. It was ShinRa, after all. With the Wutai War going on and all, it might not be the best idea to tell these guys... I cleared my throat, glancing away. "Well, Mrs. Bensa always told me I'm, ah, from Wutai. But I was raised here." Zack whistled, impressed. "Wow, all the way from Wutai?" He squinted at me. "Now that you mention it, it's pretty obvious, except for your tan. But that doesn't explain all...this." He said, gesturing to the my hair that weren't covered by Kid's beanie. I shrugged, not really bothering to explain. I didn't know either. "So what about you? Where're you from?" I asked, uncomfortable. Zack grinned, pointing to himself.
"Gongaga!" He said proudly.
I shook my head, "Never heard of it."
"I'm not surprised; it's a pretty backwater town."
"What about your eyes? I bet those are contacts."
"Nope, it's because of the mako. Once you get the mako shots, your eyes will look like this too."
I frowned at this information. I liked my boring brown eyes. Zack straightened up as Sephiroth climbed in, closing the large sliding door. "Go," He told the guy at the controls. As the helicopter began to lift, I felt my stomach drop, and began to dread eating breakfast this morning. The helicopter tilted slightly, making me jump as my stomach flipped. Nausea hit me in waves, and I closed my eyes tightly, trying to push the feeling down. I felt someone's hand on my shoulder and heard Zack's voice. "Hey, are you alright?" I shook my head in answer, regretting it immediately as my body tilted to the right. "...Vertigo..." Was all I could get out. Opening my eyes, I saw Zack moving over to help me up. "Oh...Just try not to puke, okay?."
I groaned, a new sense of dread washing over me.
This is gonna be a long ride...
What seemed like hours later, we finally flew over our destination.
"Hey, Snow, check it out." Zack said, pointing out the window to my right. I managed to restrain from throwing up for a minute to look out. My eyes widened at the sight.
The sky was dark, thousands of lights below illuminating like stars. I had never seen anything like it before; Costa del Sol wasn't much of a city, and almost never had so many lights after dark, unless there was a festival. I couldn't take my eyes off the lights.
"That's Midgar," Zack explained, "where the ShinRa building is."
I blinked, amazed at the city below. It was hard to believe that I'd be living there soon. Something told me that, despite how pretty it was, getting used to this new environment would be scarier than I thought. Anxiety bloomed in my stomach, but I pushed it away, ignoring the bad feeling forming in its place. I took a breath to calm my heart, which had started to speed up. Calm down, calm down. You'll be fine. I thought, looking away from the window.
The helicopter landed on he roof of a tall building, and as Zack helped me down, I struggled to keep from dropping to my knees and kissing the concrete. A guy in a black suit came and cut the handcuffs from my wrists. I thanked him, rubbing the bruises that had started to form where the metal had cut into my skin. My legs were a bit shaky, and though Zack insisted on helping me, I managed to walk on my own. Sephiroth was talking to the guy in the suit while Zack explained what was going to happen over the next few hours. "I think you'll be tested first, to see how well you do in a fight without mako. Then, you'll be taken to the infirmary to have a check up."
"A check up? Why?"
"I guess to see if you're healthy. It's what they do to everyone who becomes SOLDIER."
"Oh. Alright then."
Sephiroth walked over and nodded to a door several feet from us. "Let's go."
Now that my motion sickness had faded some, I found it was easier to keep up with the two SOLDIERs as we made our way through the door and down a hallway. Bright florescent lights lit the hall, the white walls seeming to glow. The heels of my boots clicked loudly against the tile floor, the sound bouncing through the silent area. There was an elevator at the end of the hall, Sephiroth sliding some kind of keycard through a slot once we reached it. The elevator doors opened, and we all shuffled into the small space. The General pushed a button and the doors closed, the elevator moving down. It was awkwardly silent as we stood there, both Zack and Sephiroth standing in front of me. I tilted my neck, hearing a loud crack. My anxiety grew as the elevator slowed to a stop, the doors sliding open. I followed the two out, blinking as my eyes adjusted to the change of lighting on this floor.
The lights weren't as bright, and the walls were more of a gray metal color. Instead of white, the floor was a darker blue tile. "First, you'll spar with an infantry man," Sephiroth said, "What happens next depends on the outcome of the spar." I swallowed nervously. Sure, I had gotten into plenty of fights before; there were scares on my stomach to prove it. But I'd never fought to show someone I could do it, and frankly, I didn't like the idea at all. This was something I wasn't ready for.
The General led us to a door with blue glass. He reached over and pressed a button, opening the door. There was a wall length computer of some kind across the narrow room, several lights flickering on the keyboard. This room was attached to a larger one, which was separated by a glass window and a door. The larger room was completely bare, except for a lone man standing inside. Sephiroth pointed to the door, "Once you step inside, the test will start." I waited for a 'good luck'. When all got was a thumbs up from Zack and a blank stare from Sephiroth, I took another breath and turned, opening the door to the larger room and walking in.
The guy inside wore a helmet, so I couldn't see his face as I approached him. The guy suddenly turned and kicked at me. I didn't have time to react, and the blow to my stomach sent me flying back. As he walked over to me, I scrambled to my feet, holding my fist up defensively. I managed to dodge his punch, and took the chance to elbow him in the throat. He gagged, backing up, and I moved a feet away from him to catch my breath. I wasn't expecting that first shot, I thought, breathing heavily, He got me good, though. I can probably pull a throat-shot again if I get close, but he's fast; there's no promise I won't miss. My thought's were interrupted as he lunged at me again. I brought my arms up just in time to block another punch, but he kicked my knee in. A jolt of pain shot up through my leg as I lost my balance and hit the cold floor. On my way down, I grabbed the guy's arm and dragged him down with me. I groaned as I sat up, rubbing my head, and turned to see that he was starting to get up as well. Alarms went off my head, making me quickly tackle him back down to the floor. I tried to hold him down, but he overpowered me almost immediately and knocked me over. I grunted and rolled over, trying to take him down.
We wrestled like that for a few minutes, until I saw a baton attached to his belt. Taking the risk, I reached over and managed to unclasp it. I tackled him again, this time holding his arms down with my knees and pressing the baton against his throat. It was silent after that. The door opened, and I looked over to see Zack running over to us. I moved off of the Infantryman and sat on the floor, panting. My stomach ached, and a headache was forming from where I'd been hit in the head. Sephiroth walked in behind Zack, and stared at me for a moment before turning to the younger SOLDIER. "Zack, take the Infantryman back to the barracks." Zack glanced at me before helping the other guy to his feet and leaving the room.
Feeling Sephiroth's eyes on me, I stared at the floor, trying to ignore the awkward silence between us. When Sephiroth spoke, I flinched.
"Get up. You need to be checked by a doctor." He turned and started walking to the door.
I stumbled to my feet, dropping the baton. "H-hey!" The General stopped, waiting for me to finish. I swallowed nervously. "Does that mean I made it?"
Sephiroth didn't turn around. "No," He said, and continued walking.
I stared at him for a few moments before sighing and following him out the door. "Alright then..."
"Name?"
"Snow Cross."
The nurse, who said her name was Bethe, gave me a look before writing down my name on her clipboard. "Alright...Age?" She asked in a nasally voice. I fiddled with my sleeve. "Sixteen."
"Where were you born?"
I didn't answer. She looked at me sympethically. "Don't worry, honey. I won't tell if you don't want me to." I hesitated, watching the nurse. She seemed to be telling the truth, and her eyes were full of loyalty. I glanced away, "...Wutai. But I was raised in Costa del Sol." Bethe nodded, smiling, and wrote it down. She turned to the nightstand next to the bed I sat on and picked up a small flashlight. "Tell me, do you have any health issues? Trouble breathing, shortness of breath, or anything like that?" I blinked as she shone the flashlight in my right eye. "Um..." I racked my mind for any information, "Does Claustrophobia count?"
"Not really, that's more of a psychological problem. Now, let's take your blood pressure. Take that off."
I nodded, unzipped my jacket, and held it in my lap while she wrapped a pad around my arm. When Bethe was done, she scribbled the information on the clipboard and said, "Just a few more tests..."
After several minutes and tests, Bethe left the room to get the doctor. I sat on the hospital bed, unsure of what to do until she got back. Anxiety started up again in my stomach, and I tried my best to push it away. Hospitals didn't normally bother me much, but I had a bad feeling that I wouldn't like whatever was coming. The door suddenly opened, making me jump. An old man walked in, wearing a white coat and glasses. He stared in disdain at me, and I instantly decided that I didn't like this man.
"A girl? In SOLDIER? How ridiculous!" The man said, pushing his glasses up. I opened my mouth to say something, but he interrupted me. "Hush! I don't want to hear your useless babble. I'm Professor Hojo." He set a metal tray holding three syringes on the table beside me. I stared at the blue-green liquid inside the containers. "You'll need to lay back," Hojo said. I did as I was told, the bad feeling growing worse as he strapped me down to the bed. "W-what's this for?" I asked nervously. Hojo grabbed a syringe and flicked it, examining the long needle. "The mako shots. We can't have you flailing about while the mako sets in." Panic flared in my chest, and I started to struggle against the restraints. Hojo turned to me, bemused. "A woman has never survived the mako shots. I suppose you'll make an excellent test of that."
He walked towards me with the needle, and I started to struggle more. The straps wouldn't budge, a sense of dread coming over me as Hojo came closer and closer.
