Words. As far as she could remember, words by loved ones or even strangers had always been the turning points in her life. What had allowed her to grow. Or even to mend. A single sentence had pushed her into life choices leading her forward. But none more so than spoken by that drell when she was just a child. When she had all but given up, his words had ignited her will to live with a single sentence. And still, words had crushed her time and time again.
A heavy and painful past, Carrin and her mother had fled Omega in hopes of finding peace after her stepfathers death. Once on board the ship that were to take them to the Citadel, Carrins mother allowed herself to cry in silence. She had never seen her mother cry before. She crawled closer, trying to console her. Her mother embraced her, asking her forgiveness, reminded her how much she loved her. She believed her when she promised things would get better.
Time in the Citadel blurred, every day seemed like a mist of constant struggle to find something to eat. Her mother tried to find a job, but without much experience in anything, stealing ended up being an easier option for her. Carrin found herself adapting to that life quickly. She learned how to pickpocket without drawing attention, to make good use of the narrow alleyways and high roof tops. Climbing balconies, trees, walls and catwalks became second nature, her mother nicknaming her 'Mist'. It was almost like a game and Carrin and her mother often sat under the neon lights in the evenings, sharing stories, laughing together as they shared whatever little scrap of food they had. But as days turned into weeks and months, her mother was still took big risks when stealing. Time and again she risked jail but kept getting away with warnings. She soon started looking for a quicker way of getting money and fell deeper into gambling debts. Whatever scraps Carrin managed to get her fingers on, her mother quickly turned into excuses for losing in yet another game of chance. Words started loosing meaning to her.
One evening Carrin sat alone in the alley, waiting for her mom to come home, hoping she wasn't in jail. She didn't expect her to remember it was Carrin's birthday, but she still hoped she would. And that's when things got blurry. All she could remember was the panic in her mothers eyes when she told Carrin to hide in one of the air ducts. She quickly hid behind the grids and witnessed the loan sharks bodyguards draw near. They demanded the money that she owed 'or else'. Her mother just stood there, like the fool she had turned into, and begged them to hold off until next month. She would for sure have the money next month, she promised.
Carrins heart hardened into a black piece of coal. All emotions melted off of her and she forced herself to watch as her mothers last light of life were beaten out of her, her eyes fixed on the grid where Carrin was sitting. Her eyes pleaded for her to look away, not wanting to be remembered as a blood filled, yellowish, blank stare but as the clear blue they once had been, full of life and strength. Carrin didn't look away. Her body turned limp and her hands fell to the floor where she sat hunched over. A tear streaked her cheek and hit the metal floor. She sat like that while the men looted her mothers lifeless body and left with a cheap necklace and some credits. She sat there as the evening turned into night, not taking her eyes off of her mother. Whatever little innocence she had left Omega with, was being washed away with every breath she took. She imagined a coat of armor slowly covering her skin, inch by inch. An armor to protect and to seal in her last streak of hope to survive alone. She was alone. She had been abandoned by everyone she knew and trusted.
She dared opened up the grid. She jumped down and let her body slam into ground without any attempt of breaking her fall, hurting her leg. She looked over at her mother and tried to focus on simply breathing. She got up on her feet and scurried away along the streets, trying to find a safe place, away from the light and the people.
Carrin woke up suddenly, her eyes sticky with eye crust and her cheeks moist with tears. She was exhausted and couldn't remember if she had slept anything at all. Feeling emotionless, her tears hadn't caught up to the distance she took to what had happened yesterday. She promised herself to never display any weakness ever again, to keep everyone and everything on an arms length. She wanted to hide, to turn invisible.
A boy a few years older than her saw her sitting curled up in the dim lit alleyway. He cocked his head at the sight. He hadn't seen her around these parts before. Most duct rats tend to stay better hidden during day hours. Curiosity took the better of him and he dared sneak closer.
"Are you okay?"
Carrin jumped in surprise but didn't get up. She looked at the boy with big eyes. When she didn't respond the boy crawled closer.
"You shouldn't sit here. C-sec will find you. You really ought to come with me"
Carrin rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand. So far she hadn't met any of the other kids, mostly because she stayed away from their usual meeting spots and the air ducts. Even though her mind was still in disarray from yesterday, she quickly realized that her chances of survival would massively increase if she would joined up with the homeless children. She stood up slowly and followed the boy.
They hurried into an alleyway and climbed up a ladder. Slowly and carefully climbing down the air duct of the building, they soon arrived at a larger area. The floor in half the room was covered in different kinds of fabrics, a sort of makeshift large bed. One of the other corners was occupied with a couple of cooking vessels and plates. Clearly, this place housed several individuals.
"Okay, so, you can live here if you'd like, but you're gonna have to contribute. We share all the food we can gather and you're gonna have to get your own blanket to sleep on. There's four others living here as well but we're usually only here in the evenings and early mornings. They call me Mouse. Just ask me anything, I know this city inside out!"
Carrin looked Mouse up and down. The boy was dressed in ragged clothes, small in stature, but the confidence in his eyes were unmistakable. She wanted to ask him a thousand questions, but only one came to mind at this point.
"Do you have anything to eat?"
Carrin sat high above the streets on the catwalk slowly munching away on, what the shop keep claimed, fish and chips. She didn't want to share her food this time. It had been exactly one year since her mother was killed which meant it was Carrins birthday. She didn't feel like celebrating. Then again, not much did these days. She preferred to fill her days any way she could, just as long as time passed and she had something to eat.
She differed a lot from the rest of the duct rats. While they used the ducts as mean of travelling through the Citadel, she had become somewhat of an expert in making good use to shadows and infiltration to get whatever she wanted, which rarely meant just food. She found a certain joy in pushing herself to do what would seem impossible - break into a safe house only to touch one of the paintings and make it out without anyone seeing her, tailing cops a whole day without them noticing her or climb the highest building without using any climbing gear. The few times she did get caught she found an opportunity to train her agility and reflexes. Though she had never touched a gun in her life she was still a force to be reckoned with. What seemed like 'dodging bullets' was simply a dance based on prediction and ability to foresee the guards' next move. Her small stature worked in her advantage and even though she did not use the air ducts out of fright and bad memories, she could easily slip in and out of small windows or hide in dark corners.
This particular day she found herself less than motivated to do anything at all, so instead she watched people passing by going on by their daily business. The Citadel hadn't changed much this last year except for the news and commercials. Granted the shopping district kept growing but that's not where you'd usually find the best gear anyway. The Alliance kept all the best goods for themselves or found its way to the black market in one way or another. Carrin had yet to find any particular gear she could make good use of and in any case, she never stole anything that wasn't necessary. If she could, she paid.
In a split second Carrin thought she felt someone standing behind her in the dark. She turned around and scanned the dark with narrowed eyes. She couldn't see anything but felt uneasy, the hair on her neck standing. Unwilling to let her eyes wander from the shadows she left the food on the floor and slowly stood up. She started walking along the catwalk, carefully listening to any steps that wasn't hers. Something moved in the dark and her eyes started to chase an invisible stalker. Quickly jumping over the rail she leaped over to a parallel catwalk and dodged behind a crate. She stopped to listen and widened her eyes to absorb as much of the dark as possible. Once her eyes got more used to the lack of light, she carefully looked around the corner of the crate. Nothing. Not a sound, not a movement.
She leaned back and scoffed silently at herself and her own paranoia.
"It is a rare sight to see such a young human display that kind reflexes".
Carrin jumped and a rush of adrenaline drained her face of color. The man sat down next to her, his arms resting on his knees, folded hands, eyes fixed on the wall in front of them. His whole being was telling her she had nothing to fear and his voice made her stomach tremble. She had never before met this race before but she knew he was drell. His scales softly reflected the poor light but his leather outfit absorbed it. His eyes were dark pools of mystery and calm. He blinked slowly and turned to face her.
"I could make good use of someone with your skills"
He handed her a chocolate bar. Not the cheap fake kind but the much more expensive, real kind of chocolate. The kind you rarely found on the Citadel. Carrin didn't dare to accept it let alone move. Her body found itself in a fight or flight dilemma which resulted in every muscle tensing. It was only out of pure curiosity that she didn't jolt over the rail and ran for it. The drell must have sensed it for he smiled and tried to offer the chocolate once more.
"My dad told me not to trust strangers"
Carrin surprised herself calling the diseased man 'dad'. She never had before.
"Mm, a wise man"
She could feel the questions linger in the air. 'Where is your father now? Why are you sitting here? Are you an orphan?' The silence went on for a while and the drell stood up. He placed the chocolate on the floor infront of her and stood up comfortably with one hand behind his back. She carefully picked it up and the drell gave her a gentle smile, turned around and walked away into the shadows. Carrin sat with her hands around the chocolate feeling it slowly melting under its foil cover. 'Skills?' she thought to herself.
