Chapter 1
" Paigeeeee" I yelled from downstairs.
" Your keys are under the coffee table" Paige yelled back as she descended the stairs. I looked at her in her track shorts and matching Upenn jacket. Her beautiful almost red auburn hair flowing past her shoulders. I followed behind her into the living room where she dropped on her knees to get my keys.
" How did you know they were there?" I asked as she stood back up with keys in hand.
" They fell on the floor after you fell asleep on the couch last night. I forgot to pick them up when I got you to bed" She dropped the keys in my hand. My hands were shaking.
" Spencer, how many cups of coffee have you had?" she asked eying me.
" Only two" I said avoiding her eyes.
" Baby you have to cut down on the coffee. I know your tired but try going to bed at a normal time" she said walking into the kitchen. She knew me too well. We were both attending Upenn. It was our sophomore year in college. She was studying architecture on a sports scholarship while I studied law. Both of us were crazy busy but made time to build a relationship over our first year of school. Now we were living together and I couldn't picture myself with anyone else. School didn't start for another two weeks but I busied myself working for a local law firm as a research assistant. Which meant crazy long hours, a lot of reading, and running errands.
" What are you doing today? I asked sitting on a bar stool in the kitchen.
" Going to the gym, going grocery shopping, and waiting for you to get off work" she said smiling at me. Her beautiful smile. She was always at the gym. It was basically her second home. I didn't mind though. Having an extremely hot girlfriend was only an up for me. Plus over the 2 months we began living together I also got back into shape. I started eating healthier and working out more.
" What about you?" she said before popping a grape in her mouth.
" I have to go in for a few hours"
" On a Saturday? And when you say a few hours you mean all day" she said not smiling.
" No. It really is going to be for a few hours. I will be home around three. I promise" I said getting off the seat. I walked around the table wrapping my arms around her waist.
" I just want to spend some time with you before we go back home next weekend and then school starts" she said looking right at me. Her voice was sincere.
" Of course baby." Next weekend we were going back to Rosewood which was like two hours away to visit family and friends. I couldn't wait to see my friends. Aria and Hannah I see at least once a month or more but Emily I hadn't seen in almost a year. She had moved all the way out to California after high school. Her mom relocated to Texas to be with her dad so she never came home. She was transferring to Upenn this year. I was excited for her to move back but also anxious. Her and Paige used to date during high school. They broke up when they decided to go to different schools. I didn't mean to fall for Paige. I didn't even know I was gay. We became close once I realized what a good person she was. We began hanging out and then about half way through the school year we started dating. We actually started dating New Years. It was a crazy night. I talked to Emily about it. She said she understood and that Paige had just been a high school crush. Seeing her face to face might be weirder than hearing it over the phone though. Everyone seemed ok with us dating. Hannah of course encouraged it saying their was always this weird sexual tension between the two of us. Aria didn't care as long as I was happy. And I was.
My girlfriend is a smart, beautiful, hilarious, interesting human being. Paige changed my whole life. Before I started dating her I only trusted Hannah, Aria, and Emily. I dated a guy my senior year who ended up being a stalker who killed one of our best friends two years previous. My dad had a secret affair with our neighbor when I was younger making my dead best friend really my half sister. My real sister dated a coach at my high school who molested several girls around my age. I mean I had a lot of reasons not to trust people. In high school I was what you would call an "Ice Queen". I ran around the school trampling over people to get what I want. When we started school at Upenn Paige helped me ease into getting to know people better. She didn't put up with my bullshit and didn't give up on me. We both grew up in very demanding households with parents who didn't accept anything less than perfection. We both thrived off success and intelligence. She was my equal. No. My better half.
" Spencer" I heard Paige say snapping me out of my thoughts.
" Yes" I said looking at her with wide eyes. Her arms were on my shoulder with my hands still on her waist.
" Your not even paying attention" she said sliding away from me.
" I've been kissing your neck and you just went somewhere else"
" I'm sorry" I said lowly.
" I have to get going. I'll see you later" she said grabbing her gym bag off the stairs.
" No later than four. Promise" she eyed me knowing I had went from three to four. I picked up my laptop bag from off the hall table and headed behind her out the door. She walked me to my car. I put my hand up to her face pulling her into a kiss. I instantly melted at the touch of her lips. I used to be such a hard ass. People used to cower from me. This girl had made me weak. She made me feel vulnerable. A way I had never felt before. I didn't like it at first. This feeling. Which is why I was so reluctant at the beginning of our relationship. I didn't want someone to get the best of me and then hurt me. My friends were the only three who knew everything about me but that was after years of knowing each other. She showed me what love really felt like and I let myself go completely with her.
" Have a good day" she said pulled away slowly. My eyes remained closed.
" You too" I said blushing. She opened the car door for me. I climbed in and buckled my belt. She closed the door gently and waved me off. The parking lot of the office was dead. I notice another intern's car near the back entrance. I get to my cubicle to find a huge pile of paperwork on my desk. I shuffle through the pile to find they all have Monday's date. Meaning their due Monday morning. I don't see the other intern so it must have been the janitor's car. Guess I am on my own. I start with the one on top. I begin highlighting information in the case and then head to the archives to find relevant cases. I turn on Pandora on my phone and begin to get in a groove. Around one my phone dies because I fell asleep without charging it last night. I continue to work through the afternoon. I start skimming the files vigorously and sticky noting everything. I let out breath of relief when I reach the bottom of the pile. I walk to the main office upstairs to put the papers in their respective mail boxes. I notice it is dark outside. I look at the big clock on the wall.
" Fuck" I snap as the clock reads 6:30. I rush out the building and zip out the parking lot. When I pull up to the apartment the clock reads 7:05.
" Shit. Shit. Shit" I say as I hop across the grass and up the front porch. I am instantly hit with the smell of roses when I open the door. There are rose petals all over the floor. A few candles lit on the hallway table. Then I hear a loud smash coming from the kitchen. I turn the corner to see Paige at the sink. She is scrubbing furiously at a pan.
" Paige" I say gently. She stops scrubbing but doesn't look at me.
" Your dinner is in the microwave." she says between gritted teeth. She rub her eyes on her arm.
" Baby. I am so sorry. I got so wrapped up and then my phone died" I explained putting my laptop case down.
" It's ok Spencer" she said drying the pan. She wiped down the counter and finished tidying the kitchen. She turned the microwave on for 30 seconds. She kissed me on the cheek.
" Happy 7 months Spence" she said before walking out the room. Now I felt like a total tool. Not only had I been late for our date but I forgot said date was our anniversary. How I could I have forgot our fucking anniversary? How am I going to fix this? The microwave goes off but I have lost my appetite. I leave the food and make my way upstairs. I can see the light on in the second bedroom where Paige's drawing desk and workout equipment is. Our bedroom smells like roses. The trashcan is filled with them. I start to feel even more guilty as I blow out the candles Paige has set around the room. I throw on some shorts and a tank top before crawling into bed. This is so unlike me. I'm used to working hard but still keeping a social life. I drift off trying to figure out where I went wrong.
Day after Christmas Last Year
"Did you have to be rude in there?" I hear her say behind me. I am stomping through the snow trying to get to my car.
" She was a terrible waitress" I snap back at her.
" Spencer she was evidently new. She was really nice. Would it have killed you just to be civil for once?" I turn around to look at her. I can see the cold air as she speaks. I glare at her.
"Those eyes don't scare me anymore. I've gotten used to the Hastings Daggers look" she jokes. I turn on my heels and continue across the parking lot.
" I had a lot of fun skating with you. I can't say much for the hot chocolate since I didn't get to finish it"
" If she made it, then it couldn't have been good" I say sarcastically. I hear the snow crunch under my feet as I keep trudging. She runs around in front of me looking at me with those huge brown eyes.
" Spencer I thought we were having a good time. Did that girl really ruin your night that much?"
" Maybe if she was doing her job instead of flirting with you then I wouldn't have blown up"
" She was just being friendly"
" No. She was not! She was flirting with you"
" Why do you care?"
" I don't. I just want to have one good night without some girl hitting on you"
" You make it sound like it happens all the time"
" It does. I know you don't think so but you are very attractive Paige. If women had the chance to get to know your personality then I would really stand no chance" I immediately look down realizing my mistake. All school year Paige and I had been spending time together as friends. I knew something was going on with me but it wasn't until recently I realized that I liked Paige Mccullers. All our arguments, fights, and duels in high school happened because we were just too alike. I found so much of myself in her. And I hold high standards. You kind of have to after dating a murderer.
" I didn't know you wanted a chance" she said slowly.
" Don't make a big deal of it. I just said your attractive" I said nonchalantly. I watched disappointment flash across her face.
" Yea of course" she said turning towards the car. That was my chance to tell her and I fucked it up. The ride back to my house was a quiet one. Her brow creased like she was in deep thought as she drove. We made a wrong turn.
" Paige, my house is the other way. We haven't been gone from Rosewood that long"
" I know" she said not looking at me. We pulled into the parking lot of our old high school. She walked around the car and opened my door.
" What are we doing?" I asked hopping down from her jeep.
" Come on" she said walking into the darkness. I followed closely behind her. I wrapped my scarf tightly around my neck as the cold night nipped at my body. We sat down on some bleachers.
" This was where I first met you. Right here on this field" she said opening her arms wide. I looked to see a snow covered field. The soccer field where Paige and I used to play field hockey.
" The first thing you ever said to me was Move it newb" I watched her giggle at the memory.
" Yea you were in the way" I said adding to the memory.
" All through high school you never had a problem telling me how you felt. Why do you now?" she said turning to me. The question caught me off guard.
" What do you mean?" I played dumb
" You are always straight forward no beating around the bush Spencer Hastings. The girl who has an answer for everything. But gets dumbfound when I ask her about liking me."
" Who said I liked you?" I said quickly. She stood up off the bleacher and moved in front of me.
" You didn't have to tell me. I already know" I couldn't stop her. I didn't want to. She pressed her lips against mine. I felt the warmth of her face close to mine. I felt her hands hold onto mine rubbing them to keep them warm. I ended the kiss after what felt like forever. I was breathless. Paige giggled at me. I could feel my cheeks turn red as I looked away from her.
" Did I just make Spencer Hastings blush?" she said triumphantly. I didn't say anything but instead just looked at her. I could feel her palm rubbing my cheek as we continued to look at each other.
" Come on. Let's get you back in the warm" Once back at the car she put the heat on full blast but we didn't move.
" Are you alright with what just happened?" she asked concerned. I nodded. We drove back to my house. My parents were out of town and I didn't want to stay alone.
" Is it ok if I stay with you? No one is at my house?"
" Yea that's fine. It will just be me and you because there is no one at my house either" she said passing my driveway.
Once in the house I changed out my damp clothes and into some really comfortable pajamas. Paige was in the bathroom while I looked around her room. It was my first time being in her room. Their was a lot of trophies and medals. She had a few motivational posters of athletes.
" Which side do you like to sleep on?" she said coming into the room.
" This one" I said plopping down on the bed.
" Good because this is my side" We both crawled into wrapping our self under the covers. We both laid for a while in silence.
" Paige...Are you sleep?" I asked whispering.
" No"
" Paige?"
" What?"
" Can you kiss me again?" I asked uncomfortably. I felt the covers shift. I felt her legs straddle my hips. She was hovering over me. She created a veil with her hair over our faces as she leaned down to kiss me.
" Mmhmm" she hummed against my lips. My hands instinctively went to her sides. I felt her bottom grind down into me. We kissed for a little while longer. She took her time kissing me and my neck. It was well over a hour before she laid back on her side of the bed. I missed the contact immediately.
" Are you ok Spencer?" she asked through the darkness.
" I am fine" I said trying not to sound too whiny.
" Goodnight?" she said almost as a question.
" Goodnight"
