He'd gone to bed early that night. The last case had been brutal, and he hadn't even wanted to go see Erin. He knew that he could have found sweet oblivion in her arms, but he was too afraid that he'd accidentally hurt her. She'd been fragile for the past few weeks, what with Morgan and Garcia gone to London and her reputation on the line. Any mention of what he'd seen these past few days would just place an undue strain on her.

So when he was woken from a deep sleep at quarter past one the next morning, Dave wondered if it was a new case that had come through so soon after their last. Groping for the phone, he groggily answered, "Hello?"

"Are you Dave Rossi?" a gruff, surly voice asked.

"Yes, can I help you?"

"I'm the bartender at Finnegan's, and I have a patron here who needs your assistance. I found your number in their phone. We close in thirty minutes, and then they'll be out in the street."

Dave nodded, though he knew the man couldn't see the motion. "I'll be there shortly." The man on the other end hung up and Dave crawled out of bed. He pulled on the clothes he'd taken off just hours ago and shoved his feet in loafers. Taking the stairs two at a time, he grabbed his keys off the counter along with his cell phone and went out to his car.

The drive to the bar didn't take too long and soon he was parking in front of the bar. Striding inside, he looked around for someone he knew, some reason he had been called down to this dive. And then he saw her. "Oh, Erin…"

She turned to look up at him, her eyes red and droopy. "Dave." He felt his heart break as she slurred out his name. "I'm sorry." He opened his arms and she stumbled over to him, wrapping her arms around his waist. "I couldn't hold them back any longer."

All he could do was nod as he pulled out his wallet, dropping a few twenties on the bar to cover her tab. Then he led his lover out to his car, helping her into the passenger seat. "I'm taking you to my home, Erin. You need to be with someone you trust."

She nodded against his chest, sobbing as he kissed her forehead gently. "I'm such a failure, Dave."

"No, you're not." He climbed in the driver's seat and drove at a fast clip to his home. "I should have come to you the moment we got home. I was hurting, and I needed you, but I didn't want to burden you. This is my fault, love."

"No, it's not. I was weak, and I didn't call my sponsor. I just let the demons take control and the whisky tasted so good going down. I had seven glasses of the vile stuff, and it tasted so delicious to me at the start. And then it was just like water."

Erin continued to weep, even as he pulled into the garage. Tenderly, he helped her from the vehicle and inside the house. She tripped over the threshold and he easily caught her, drawing her closer to his side. "We'll get through this slip together. I won't let you go through this alone." He turned his head to kiss her temple and she nodded.

Somehow, he got them up to his bedroom and she stood before him, her head drooped low. Passively, like a child, she let him take off her clothes, stripping her down to her panties. He quickly divested himself of his own clothes and then led her over to his bed. "Will you just hold me, please? I can't ask you to tell me that everything will be all right. It won't. I had made it six months sober. Six months, gone like that. Maybe it's time I just shuffle off and let someone better take over my job. Someone who won't screw everything up."

Dave pulled the covers up around them before tugging her close to his chest. "You are not going anywhere, Erin Strauss. One small mistake does not make you a failure. Most everyone does slip when they give up something as addictive and readily available as alcohol." He kissed her tenderly and then began to stroke her back in soft, circular movements. "In the morning, when we wake up, we'll talk more. Sleep now." She nodded and nuzzled her face into his shoulder. He could feel her tears wet his skin and he began to softly croon her favorite song in her ear, helping her to relax.

Erin fell asleep much more quickly than he did, but finally, he gave himself over to sleep. It was dreamless, thank God, and he woke in the morning feeling somewhat refreshed. Still, she slept on, and he sat up against the headboard, carefully maneuvering her so that her head rested against his chest.

Dave contented himself with playing with her hair, curling strands of it around his fingers. She'd let it begin to grow longer again, and it reached her shoulder blades now, long enough to put up, and he loved it. Though he didn't tell her, he adored her with longer hair. But he didn't want her to feel like she had to have long hair for him.

Fifteen minutes later, he felt her stir in his arms. "Davie? My head hurts so badly. What happened last night?" she murmured as she rubbed her forehead.

"I picked you up from Finnegan's. You had seven glasses of whisky."

"Oh, god, that wasn't a nightmare, then. I had hoped that I was only dreaming." She broke down crying, nuzzling her face into his chest as he once more rubbed her back. "I don't remember much about last night, what I said, or what I might have done. What have I done?"

"Nothing that you can't fix, love."

"Really?"

"Really, Erin. Everyone slips at some point. And I'm going to be a better partner to you, support you more. You do know that any time you need to, you can call me? I will always answer you call. Even if it is a quarter after one."

"I'm beginning to see that, David." She kissed his chest and wrapped her arm around his waist. "I have to tell my group that I failed, David. I don't look forward to that."

"Why?"

"They're judgmental. They know me from the bank incident, despite the supposed anonymity of the organization. This is going to sound horrible, but I dread going there. I never tell the truth, because they wouldn't understand. I can see it in their eyes."

"Is that why you didn't call your sponsor? Because she judges you?"

"Yes." Her short answer confirmed everything he had thought was bubbling below the surface, the things she wouldn't confide in him about.

"I think I know a solution to your problem, if you're willing to trust me."

She pulled back to look into his eyes. "If I didn't trust you, I wouldn't be with you still. I know you've changed, I only wish I could say the same about me. What is this solution you're proposing?"

He took a deep breath, hoping Penelope would go along with this, once he had explained. "Penelope Garcia is a licensed therapist, and she keeps secrets quite well. I would trust her with my life, Erin. If she would be willing to be your sponsor, your confidante, the person you can talk to no matter what, would you be willing to meet with her?"

Erin was quiet for a while, her thumb rubbing along his chest. "You don't think it odd that I can't find peace in group therapy?"

"No, some people aren't made to reveal everything to everyone. Like me, you are intensely private, preferring to keep your secrets locked deep inside where no one can find out about them without you telling them. The alcoholism is a side effect of that." He stroked her hair lightly. "You need to tell someone what bothers you, why you feel like you're drowning. I love you, Erin, and I want you to get better."

"I know you love me, though at times, I don't know why. I've only brought you trouble and pain in these last few months. And I love you, with all my heart's pieces. Would you call her, then? It would probably go easier if you asked first."

He nodded, pulling her closer to his chest. "All right, I'll do that now then. It's about two in the afternoon in London, she should pick up." Grabbing his phone off the bedside table, he called Penelope's number.

"Good afternoon, my Italian Stallion. Or should I say good morning, where you are."

He felt his face relax into a smile. "Good day, Kitten. Look, I need to call in a favor from you, and it had to be kept under wraps. My girlfriend needs a new sounding board, her current one is less than reliable."

"Is everything okay?"

"No, which is why we're calling you. I'm relying on your empathy and discretion here, Penelope."

"Understood, Sir. May I speak with her a moment."

"I was hoping you'd say that." He handed the phone over to Erin and she smiled a little as she put it up to her ear.

"Hello, Ms. Garcia. All right, Penelope, then. Yes, yes, I'm sorry that I failed you all. Yes, I did." She started crying once more and he squeezed her waist gently. "I would like to have someone who understands the job I have, the life I lead, in my life that I can talk to when the cravings get too bad. Are you sure you feel comfortable with that? Okay, then, we'll set a lunch date for when you return. Thank you. Have a good day."

Erin disconnected the call and handed the phone back to Dave. "How are you feeling?"

"Defeated?"

"Oh, Erin." He pulled her close, rubbing her back softly. "You are not defeated. You are getting back up after a stumble. We all stumble and fall, and that is okay. It is okay to rely on your friends." He kissed her forehead and she sighed.

"I think I know that, deep down in my heart, but I can't find a way to make that connect with my brain. Will you keep reminding me?"

"Of course I will. I love you."

"I love you, too, David." She kissed his chest and then rested her head where her lips had just touched. "Thank you for understanding me." He heard her gag and reflexively gagged with her. "Oh god, this is the part I did not miss at all." Erin pulled away from him and jogged into the master bath.

As she threw up, Dave slipped off the bed and joined her, pouring her a glass of water from the sink and fishing two aspirin out of the medicine cabinet. "Here, take this." She took the proffered items as she flushed the toilet and leaned against the counter as she sucked down the water, swallowing the pills. "Is there anything that sounds good to you this morning?"

"Toast? With strawberry jam?"

"I have strawberry preserves, almost the same thing, right?" She nodded and followed him out of the room. "Here, put on one of my shirts." He handed her a purple button down, and she shrugged it on over her shoulders, buttoning the buttons quickly.

"I like wearing your shirts, then I can smell like you." She smiled up at him, and he saw the tender longing in her eyes.

"I like your hair longer like this. I like being able to play with it while you sleep." Her smile grew and she reached out to hold his hand as they went downstairs together. "But if you want to cut it, I'd be fine with that, too."

"Did you know that when I was in high school my hair was down to my hips? I want to grow it longer again, I just don't think it would be very professional."

"Maybe it's time for you to screw professional and start doing what makes you happy." She nodded as they went into the kitchen and she pulled out the toaster as he got out the bread and preserves.

"Maybe so." They made breakfast together, and for the first time in their relationship, he saw her barriers come down. And he prayed to God that they stayed down this time. "My heart is tender, David."

"So is mine. No more barriers?"

"I cannot promise that, but I will promise to try my hardest to stay completely open and honest with you and Penelope."

"That's all I ask, love." She sighed, happily this time, and he leaned down and kissed her gently. "That's all I'll ever ask." Erin nodded and kissed him once more, a peace settling over her features as she set the dishes on the table. "And that's all I'll ever try to be."

"Sweet promises we'll hold each other to." He nodded and they began to eat, their conversation turning to the day ahead of them and how they planned to move forward, together.