Eddy Fills Anime
By Dead Promises
First thing's first. I don't own Ed Edd and Eddy, or any of the anime featured.
I have nothing against anime (In fact, I'm actually a fan of some of them).
I have nothing against gay people either.
I only wrote this cause I was bored.
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Eddy entered his room quietly as he glanced straight at what he thought he was going to have to look for.
The remote control.
"There you are! Come to Eddy!" Eddy said as he walked to where it was, obtained it, and sat his lazy butt down on the chair which he had pointed at the one place he'd focus his hope, entertainment, and eyesight on.
The television.
"Man, this person who's writing this crap keeps repeating the same thing over and over again" began Eddy. "There must be one thing that he is if he happens to keep this going on".
"Stoned"
And thus, with one click of a power button, Eddy's television was on before he could even claim it being for the time's sake.
"Lame! Super Lame! Lame-o! Lame to the third power!" Eddy said to himself while flipping through countless channels that had the same thing which made it unappealing for Eddy.
Nothing to watch.
"Yup, this narrator's definitely been tipping on four fours!" Said Eddy, when finally, he comes across a channel with material sufficient for his pleasing.
Ani-
Erm, I mean a show dubbed as Animax, which contained many of the best anime shows that were perhaps enough to choke a donkey off it's back.
Plus, if you did not like one, you could easily change it to the next show on its running schedule.
"That did not make sense, but it was better than what you were going to blurt out!" Eddy said as he began watching from five to ten minutes of each show to see if he'd want to watch it or not.
As he browsed, he made a comment for it before he moved on to another one, and his first choice was:
One Piece, 5 minutes
"Okay, that's just stupid! Not only does it rip off pirates of the Caribbean with it's gaudy plot, but what would suck more than having to listen to a douched up rap than hear the real version of the freaking song? Those Asian pricks weren't lazy enough to traduce it to Spanish!" Eddy exclaimed standing up at one point for five seconds.
Thus, he went on to the next show:
Love Hina, 20 minutes (how long the perverted scenes lasted put together)
"Not bad, one of the only good reasons I actually have this channel!" said Eddy while grabbing his……err, something that begins with "cr" and rhymes with "Blotch".
Next!
Digimon, 2 minutes
"Congratulations, I officially and furthermore prestigiously award you as you have been truly given the honor and the privilege with this hand gesture-" Said Eddy as he gives "the finger" to the TV screen "-for being the best show that rips off Pokemon since Duel Masters ripped off Yu-Gi-Oh!" said Eddy happily yet sarcastic as well.
Now for the next.
Naruto, 60 seconds (sounds more precise than saying "a freaking minute")
"Okay, I've seen a man make out with another man. I've even heard some of Kelvin Breaderline's raps.
But THAT has far none got to be the gayest show I had ever wasted my eyesight on! I mean, I don't mind them ripping off Pokemon as well with something called the "nine tailed fox" (although I do hope they get sued for it) but for shitting out loud!! Who's ever heard of a freaking ninja wearing frilly rainbow colors?!
Next they'll show us how republicans can actually handle a country without going through accidental war with other countries plus without making Texans look bad by having a Texan president who can't even answer a kindergartener's question Handle the doomed place! It's a good thing the person who created this douched up fic lives down in Mexico!" Said Eddy, left dumbfounded by seeing how much he was able to utter.
"The only thing that didn't stop me from watching this show was that "sexy shi-Tzu" move that spiked haired kid pulled" Eddy added folding his arms.
Next show was:
Full metal Alchemist, 6 minutes
"I told myself Naruto was pathetic, LOOK AT THIS!! I don't mind a robot person with a lowing cloth, but being someone who took sock head's stupid advise and actually read the freaking Manga, this is bull nuggets! How dare they only make fifty one episodes of the anime series when the Manga has more than seventy in Japan! Moral children: never trust someone who symbolizes themselves as a midget cow with glasses!" Eddy once again snapped.
In search of the show
The one that's the best.
Eddy had no choice
Except to say "Next"
Sailor Moon, the entire show.
"One of these days, those sailor scouts will bend down and I'll get to witness the glory of panty wonderland!" Eddy said, confident as any deviant possibly could be.
Siguiente!
Inuyasha, 7 minutes.
"Okay, where to start? There are demons, jewel shards, a hot school girl, this white haired dude with a freaking cloud for an arm, um, I would research to find out more about this highly complex and somewhat intriguing show, but then it would be like studying for a stupid final exam!(which I don't do anyway).
Pass!" Eddy said.
Here comes the next
Surpass the rest.
Dragon ball, 25 minutes.
"Okay, had it not been for the show's underrated action, I would have thrown free popcorn at this crap! Geez, when will Goku realize he's the one who pulled the trig on his dumb Grandpa?!" Eddy said
Now for the next, hope more complex:
Bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo, 3 minutes
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…Okay, there couldn't be a more precise clarification to what one can think of and accomplish when one smokes grass. This however is evidently sufficient for my well knowing" Said Eddy, nearly horrified from the show's intense way of confusing him.
Umm, NEXT!
Avatar: The Last Air bender, 5 minutes.
"Why would Charlie Brown want to move air and tattoo a damn arrow on his calve skull? If only Charles M. Schultz were alive to see this! He'd be so disappointed, he'd die again from seeing how weak the plots are, and how cheesy the jokes really turn out from failing to seek that out of reach punch line! In Charlie Brown's own and none altered eternal words, "Good fucking grief!"" Eddy said.
Turns Off The Television
"Well, this was really a reign of nothing but wasted life!" Said Eddy.
"What am I doing watching this crap anyway? I should be thinking of a scam!" Said Eddy, as he finally chose to go somewhere he had not known earlier actually awoke numerous chances for him to continue his spree of scams.
Outside.
Oh Crap!
"Oh Crap is right, you cunt!!!" Yelled Eddy, as he took the remote control, and threw it right at the narrator's head.
Causing the underpaid dude to go unconscious for about twelve hours.
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Flame Me Today
Flame Me Tomorrow
Flame Me for all this fic
I didn't write, that good.
(Or just review if you're not like those stupid whiney babies who didn't like something they did not have to read in the first place and could have just simply minded their own stupid business instead of having to waste their non existent lives searching for errors in my fics I don't really give a shit about anyhow whether they tell me or not).
