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I leaned against my bedroom's window seal. The cold air nipped at my neck and face, as my mind bounced everywhere. My mind bounced from the vampires I've faced, all the close encounters I had with death. How close I got from being turned, when the watchers council tested me, how close I got from it all being over. From that...that...that sick monster to be my...what do you call it? Sire? My mind wanders to the master, and my battle with him, how the hopelessness engulfed me when the master put me under his thrall. The next time I was under the whole vampire thrall thing was Dracula and he tried to make me one of his concu-fricken-bines. My mind then bounces to angel. He took my virginity, He bit me, Marked me, left me. I have the best luck don't I? I smile bitterly as tears well up in my eyes.

I hear Dawn come into my bedroom and I say to her, not bothering to look at her, "D-Dawn, please give me few minutes. I-I'll be down s-soon to make us dinner."

"Tsk. Tsk. You should be more careful, Slayer. Your slayer-senses are getting rusty." I look back to see Spike.

"Hello, Lovely."

He smirks but immediately stops as his eyes widen in shock.

"Slayer, are you crying?"

My eyes widen as I look away and wipe my eyes. "N-No. I'm f-fine. What do you want, Spike?" I let out a shaky breath before looking back out the window.

He pauses before saying, "Well, if you must know, I came to see you."

"Well, I figured that out, Captain Obvious. You're in my room, I'm asking you, what do you want from me?"

"You."

"What? I-", I'm cut off by him kissing me.

I push him off and yell at him, "Spike?! What the hell!? We aren't doing this anymore! I thought we went-"

"I can't stop thinking about you, Slayer. And what I wanna do to that sweet little-" "SPIKE!", I cut him off.

"Oh, c'mon, Slayer-" "Why would you want to again anyways-" "Because I love you, Damn it! That hasn't changed."

I turn back around and look out the window, leaning against the window seal like I was before, away from him.

"I know you don't love me back, and I accept that, but you can't change that fact that I can make you feel good-" I cut him off.

"Do you really want me? Are you willing to do what it takes to have me?"

"W-What? Y-Yeah! Anything you want, Love-"

"No. Not just me physically. Are you willing to have me. Not just sexually, but romantically and all that cheesy-ness."

"Oh...B-Buffy...A-Are you serious? I mean, I-"

"Not just that!" I sight and slam my hands on the window seal and grip it tight as I think about all the vampires I've faced. All the death I've seen and felt.

"If you want me, Have me. If I am to be with you, I have to be yours. All the vampires, all the demons, everything that goes grrr must be able to know that I belong to you."

"W-What do you mean?"

"I want you to marry me. Not a church marriage with the whole white gown and all the holy vows- I want it private, just you and me. I want to be yours. I want to exchange blood, how ever you do a freaky vampire wedding, and I want to be yours. So that everyone I've faced, everything I've done, won't be in vain. I want to belong to you. I want it in writing, in blood, that no one else can claim me. No one can...try and...toy with me again because I will be yours." My voice wavered as tears filled my eyes. There goes nothing.

I take a deep breath and continue, "Those are my terms. If you can't handle them, then you can go. And we will not speak of it again."

I don't look at him because I know what his reaction will be.

"You are fuckin' bonkers, Slayer. Seriously, you belong in a nut house." And there it is.

I hear the door open and shut. Followed by stomping. My heart throbs and I look down.

I'll never be happy. It's just like with Angel. I give my all, and I get nothing in return. Absolutely nothing. Tears run down my cheeks and I drop to my knees in front of the window.

I sob loudly, unshed tears that were held in over the years. I cradle my head in my hands.

My heart stops as I see two black leather combat boots hit the floor in front of my window through my fingers. I look up confusedly through blurred tears as he drops to his knees too. He looks at me emotionlessly before picking up my left hand, and sliding on a skull ring. The one that was used during that time Will put us under a spell.

"S-Spike...?"


Thank you for reading! Should I continue it? I wanna continue it! Please let me know what you think!