AN: This is a sort of continuation on from my fic 'Swimming Towards Sanity' you don't need to read it to understand this but if you wanted to go back and read it, I won't stop you.

This is for phnxgrl who gave me the start of this idea. I know it's not completely what you had in mind but once I got this into my head I had to keep writing.

Disclaimer: Not mine, I just use them as puppets to do my own bidding.

Finding Dry Land

Kate Beckett didn't know what to expect the first time that she met Richard Castle. She knew he was handsome; she could see that just by looking at the dusk jackets of his novels; those same novels that lined her bookshelves and kept her afloat during the darkest days of her life. Here she was now, a few years later, standing in line to meet the man she owed her life to. What would he be like? Kate already knew that he was a family man who looked after his daughter on his own. But what was hidden? Would he be suave and sophisticated or would he be egotistical and rude? She just didn't know. Kate stood there in line, clutching her copy of 'Hell hath no fury' waiting for her turn to meet with the enigma that was Richard Castle. Over two hours she waited to see him and the first thing she noticed about him was his piercing blue eyes; eyes that seemed to look right into her inner most depths.

And then he smiled. "Who should I make this out to?" he asked her.

How she managed a coherent reply was beyond her. She eventually stammered out her name to him and he jotted down a message into the inside cover of her book. She thanked him and as she turned away she heard him reply, "Always."

It wasn't until she got home that she actually took a look at what he had written to her. It read, "For Kate, I know there is a little girl trapped inside you. Don't be afraid to let her out. Always, Richard Castle."

Several years later their lives crossed paths once again. This time Kate was a hard-nosed homicide detective who had hauled his ass down to the precinct as a suspect in their murder investigation. She didn't like the man that sat across from her, first in the interrogation room and then again in the conference room when they were going through his fan mail. He was arrogant and his ego hardly fit through the door. Kate couldn't believe it when Captain Montgomery told her that Richard Castle would continue to follow her around as his 'muse'. She hated that word.

Kate and her shadow worked together that whole first year that it took him to write 'Heat Wave'. She had told him about her mother but banned him from looking into it further. Some lines were not meant to be crossed. However, Castle being Castle, he just couldn't stay away. Once she thought about it, she knew he only did it because he cared, it never meant that she couldn't be mad at him though. Even Will knew there was no malice involved. Kate had only met Will once she had started swimming again and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't break down the walls that she had erected.

Castle was let back into her life once he had calmed down a little. She was glad that Lanie was there to threaten him. Lanie Parish may be short in stature, but you wouldn't want to cross her in a dark alley when she's mad. Kate decided that the car jacking that occurred was punishment enough for Castle; that and the look on his face when he saw her act like a Russian slut was priceless. Visa had nothing on Kate Beckett that night.

That year saw them get closer; Castle put up one hundred thousand dollars of his own money to help catch her mother's killer. Nothing seemed too big for him when it came to Kate. They teased and bickered, had silly moments and emotionally tense ones; enter Tom Demming. The only reason Kate gravitated towards him was because she was scared of what she was beginning to feel for Castle. She didn't want those feelings at that particular moment. It took Esposito to knock some sense into her for her to realise that she was stringing both men along and had to choose which one she wanted more. Enter Gina. Castle left her for the whole summer without a single phone call and she was hurt. Both of them had terrible timing. Were they ever going to figure it out?

It took another series of murders for them to be reunited once more. She wasn't going to let him back in, but she missed him too much over the summer to give him up completely, even if they both had significant others to go home to at night. Saving each other's lives had an affect on her that day; so what if Esposito called her on purposely losing the bet. She got her partner back; because that's what they were, only then did she realise it.

This past year they grew from Castle and Beckett to Rick and Kate. There was still that line that they couldn't cross but they skirted it far too many times for it to be considered a coincidence. The lingering touches, the hugs, the comforting, it meant something to them both. The heavy make-out session they both partook in complicated matters. There was an unspoken rule that it would never be discussed out in the open; what happens undercover stays undercover. She was still with Josh despite the growing feeling in the pit of her stomach that he wasn't her 'one and done'; he was just the 'for now' guy, holding the place of the right man. Everyone kept pointing out that Rick was that man, but could she let go and go for it. He had followed her to the opposite end of the country, where was he not willing to o for her. Why didn't she tell Josh about what had happened? Royce had a point, she didn't want to look back on her life and tell herself 'if only'. Her mother had told her that she should have no regrets. Kate didn't want her fears to hold her back from living the life that she wanted.

Kate Beckett didn't know what the future was going to hold for her but she knew that she had to make her decision soon or the ship was going to sail. She didn't want those 'if onlys' in her life. Richard Castle had told her 'always', she had even said it back and meant it. He had kept her from drowning all those years ago and she continued swimming. Richard Castle was her dry land that she wanted to call home.


Well there you have it. I hope you enjoyed it. I like delving into the depths that make up Kate Beckett. She is such an interesting character that I can only hope to do justice to. Please let me know what you think, I greatly appreciate it when you do.