Lana Anderson looked around her old office with feelings of bitterness, disappointment, and a hint of anger. Downsizing, they said. Economy in recession. An unfortunate necessity. They could call it whatever they wanted; she called it getting fired. With a dejected sigh she closed the door behind her and walked out with the box of her things held at her hip.


"Don't you dare tell Annie yet," she demanded of her mother when she told her on the phone. "I don't want her worrying about me during the wedding. I'll tell her when she gets back from her honeymoon."

"Well if you're sure about that," said her mother, Bonnie. "You'll be by in the morning to help with decorations then?" Lana agreed and hung up.

The next morning Lana arrived on schedule to find her mother practically in a panic and her sister Annie was puffing on her cigarette as if it contained some vital life source. "The minivan's broken down," Bonnie announced. "Today of all days! I don't know how we'll possibly get all these decorations there!"

"Ma, I told you, we'll just have to bring all the decorations over in Lana's car. There's nothing else to do!" Annie interjected with an exasperated exhale of smoke.

"Those decorations filled almost the whole van when I picked them up. There is no way it will all fit into Lana's car," their mother insisted.

"Ma, I'm sure I can fit it all in my trunk. Just bring it out to me," said Lana. She had been prepared for some meltdown of this degree to occur at some point over the weekend. Annie had long since designated Lana the peacekeeper for the event. Actually, her exact words had been, "Just make sure I don't murder anyone. I won't want bloodstains on my wedding dress."

Lana was also quite confident that whatever was needed to fit in the trunk would. She was actually quite well known for being able to compact all kinds of things in there that people didn't believe would fit. On a dare once, she was able to get three people inside. Once everything was packed in the trunk, much to Bonnie's astonishment, they were ready to drive over for the rehearsal. Annie was puffing on her third cigarette since Lana's arrival and said, "I told you it would fit, Ma. I swear to you her trunk is bigger on the inside." She looked over to her sister, "Can I drive?"

"No," said Lana. "I don't care if it is your wedding, it's still my car. Nobody drives Blue around but me."

"I still don't understand why you named your white car Blue," said Annie.

"It just felt right," said Lana and they drove off.


It was the morning of the wedding, and Lana was running about the venue herding guests and other details to their place. The pianist was playing a lovely rendition of Beethoven's "Fur Elise." Seeing her great aunt Joan struggling with a walker she went over to help. Aunt Joan was 74 and very conservative and set in her ways. She leaned in to Lana, "You know it's wonderful that Annie is settling down with such a nice man. It's a shame you haven't settled down yet. You know you're such a lovely woman. There's no reason you're younger sister should be getting married before you." Lana muttered something about focusing on her career and walked away just as soon as she got Aunt Joan to her seat.

Lana pulled her silenced cell phone from her neckline to check the time. Max, the groom, should be in place by now. As she went off to look for him, she wondered what excuse she'd be able to use to stave off the vultures now that she didn't have a career to focus on. She supposed she'd have to either find another job quick or just start telling her relatives to shove it. The truth was, she'd rather have no relationship than a bad one, but this logic seemed lost on people like her mother and Aunt Joan who felt she ought to be married with children by now like was proper.

Suddenly, she stopped. There were voices coming from a janitor's closet. She opened the door to find Max and one of the caterers locked in embrace. She could see the panic in his eyes at being caught and she could tell he was about to bolt. "Don't even think about it," she said. In a sweeping motion, she grabbed a broom and closed the door on them. She used the broom to jam the door as a makeshift lock. Then she picked up the phone, "Annie, I'm down the hall from you. You need to come out here."

Annie appeared at the end of the hallway a moment later, looking resplendent in her white gown as the late afternoon sun framed her figure from the window behind her. "Annie, I'm going to show you something you need to see, but before I do, please remember you don't want to murder anyone this weekend. If you've changed your mind about blood on the dress, just remember that there is a building full of witnesses."

They looked at each other for a moment, and then Annie said, "This is bad, isn't it?" Lana nodded, then removed the broom and opened the door.

Max looked at his would-be bride sheepishly. The caterer looked at Annie and then back at Max. "You're the groom? You told me you were the best man!" She shoved past the bride and ran off in horror.

Max cleared his throat and said, "Honey, you know it's bad luck for me to see you right now."

"That's right," said Annie. "Bad luck for you." Then she punched him in the face.


After a long day of cancelling the wedding and sorting out the details, Lana and Annie sat together at the venue's bar for a drink, both still dressed in their lavish wedding clothes. Annie had burned through an entire pack of cigarettes in the intervening hours and was now starting to curse that she was out. "Here," said Lana, handing her another pack from her bag.

Annie gave her a look. "You don't smoke."

"I know," said Lana. "I tipped one of the staff to run out for an extra pack for you after we found Max. I figured you'd need it. Always prepared, you know."

Annie gratefully took the pack and lit one up. "Have I ever told you that you are my favorite sister?"

Lana smiled at their long running joke. There were no other sisters. "Ah, well, I'm glad to know I still rank. I'm very competitive, you know."

Annie said, "Yes I know. I suppose that's how you got that cushy management position at W. McDermott's."

Lana cleared her throat and shifted uncomfortably on the bar stool. "Ah yes, well about that…I was fired this week."

Annie looked at her in shock. "What? Why? Why didn't you tell me?"

"To answer those questions in order, yes you heard correctly; some mumbo jumbo about the economy and downsizing; and I didn't want you to worry about me during your wedding," she said ticking off each answer on her fingers as she went. "I was going to tell you when you got back from your honeymoon."

"Oh, god the honeymoon!" exclaimed Annie. "What a waste! That trip is non-refundable you know!"

"Well you should still go," Lana reasoned. "You shouldn't have to miss out on a fantastic trip just because Max can't keep it in his pants. Besides, I'm betting you'd do well to get away for just a wee bit."

"You know you should come with me," said Annie. Lana gave her a look, but Annie continued on. "Well you've already got the time off from work, and you wouldn't want that extra ticket to go to waste either, would you?"

Lana smiled, "Mmph, I suppose you're right. And I suppose that I would do well to get away for just a wee bit as well."

A stranger across the bar called over, "Did you just get married? You look beautiful!" Lana and Annie turned their heads to give the woman twin glares of disgust. A week later, they left for Scotland.


The pair arrived at the bed and breakfast in a small Scottish village feeling worn out from the long trip from America. Annie went in ahead to check in while Lana began to unload luggage from their rented car. A woman came to greet Annie, looking warm and cheerful; exactly what Annie was not in the mood for. "You must be Mrs. Leonard! We have the honeymoon suite all ready for you!"

"It's Ms. Anderson. Where is the room?" she said through clenched teeth.

"Och, my apologies, Ms. Anderson," she said in a soft Scottish brogue. "You must be one of those modern ladies who likes to keep her maiden name. Where's your bonnie groom then? Oh, you must have him carrying all the heavy things. It's best to have men do those things; makes them feel important." The woman winked conspiratorially at Annie as if they were best friends. Before Annie could tell this ridiculously chipper woman off, Lana walked in with the luggage.

The woman looked from Lana to Annie then back to Lana again with her jaw held slack. Looking at Lana with the luggage, she said, "Are you Ms. Leonard then?"

Annie interjected, "This is my sister! I didn't get married, you twat!" She was practically growling she was so annoyed with this woman.

"Oh," said the woman meekly. "But I thought you booked the honeymoon suite."

"I did," said Annie, her words becoming more and more heated. "I was supposed to be married, but my fiancé decided to start his own honeymoon early with the caterer. Now quit being so damn chipper and nosy and show me my room!"

Once they got to the room, Lana quietly pulled the woman aside. "Make sure everyone on your staff is aware that neither of us are to be referred to as Mrs. Anything, and certainly not Leonard. Understood?"

"Of course, Miss," said the woman who was now watching Annie out of the corner of her eye to be sure she wouldn't turn violent. Lana tipped the woman as she left.

Just before Lana and Annie turned out the lights for the evening, a blue police box materialized in front of the bed and breakfast.


Somewhere else in town, a small group of creatures convened. They were bipedal, had grey scaled skin, gills on their necks, and a protruding fin on their backs. Their fingers were slightly webbed and they each had a large mouth with sharp, protruding teeth. One creature approached the one sitting at the head of the table, the leader. "The eggs and nanobots should be fully dispersed by our calculations. Shall we activate the enzymes?"

"Yes," said the leader. "Our children will be born and our people shall rise again."