I can't believe what I did
. Why did I do it!? Why wasn't I strong enough to fight the evil inside of me!? After everthing I have been through...After everthing my team has been through...I had to cause them pain and I know the hate me. Eve though they neglect it, I know or at least believe what they think of me. How could I have been so stupid! Nova has always called me the dumb monkey and she was right...I'm such an idiot. I'm the dumbest monkey alive.
After everything that has happened, I almost destroyed Shuggazoom, I almost destroyed my home, I almost hurt my Faily and worst of all...I almost killed the one I love. But after everything, I can no longer call this place my home, I can no longer call those four monkeys and human boy my family, And any chance I ever had with the love of my life, is gone...forever. I caused everyone pain...I am not worthy enough to be a hero, I shouldn't be called a hero. All the trust anyoe had, ever had in me is gone. I dont belong here anymore...I never did. If I wasn't strong enough to fight the evil inside of me...then i'm not strong enough to be a hero...I'm n othing but a loser.I lost my trust in everyone, No one trusts me anymore, I don't even trust myself. I hurt everone one of my team mates, something I thought I would never,ever do.
i wish i coud just change the past. I wish I would of never grabbed that fire. I should of listened to Gibson...istead I just litsened to my head. This stupid brain I have, full of stupid ideas. We might of won the war for now but what if something else came towards Shuggazoom? I'm not strong enough for anything..nothing. I'm worth nothing to the peope of Shuggazoom, my team mates. Everyone says it wasn't mt fualt...that I wasn't in control but i know they re doing it to make me feel better even though it's making me feel worse because I know it is MY fault.
y fualt and it will always be. I would never forgive myself. I hurt mjy friends, my family, but worst of all I hurt my love. Nova That one namd fils me with guilt. That one name fills me with anger towards myself. The memories of that one name make me regret living, I could still her her cries towards me. Her pleads as I tear her apart. That one name that has always brought tears to my eyes. i cant belive I did that to her. I won't ever forgive myself. If the fire of hate returns in me the thing I don't want is be close to my family. I wipe my tears away and I look around my room. It will always be my fualt no matter what. If only I could just disapear...but I know I will always end up coming back to my family...to my love. If it wasn't for Nova I would of kiled everyone. They should of fought back. They should of killed me. Nova saved me by...confessing. She confessed she loved me..She...kissed me!? Well on the cheek but it was still a kiss. After everything I did to her...she kissed my cheek. She cried for me? I shook my head and sighed deeply...I dont deserve her...I never will...I dont deserve the family i have...I guess I never did and I never will. They should of killed Review please! How ya liking the story so far? Thanks for reading.
