Disclaimer: If I owned Han and Leia, Star Wars would be rated NC-17. So obviously, I don't own any of it. It all belongs to George Lucas. BOW BEFORE GEORGE LUCAS!
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The Princess Leia Organa, formerly of Alderaan, leaned against the landing arm of the Millennium Falcon and stared at the closed shield doors. Leaving Luke out there hurt her. More than she had ever expected it too.But... leaving Han out there hurt almost as much. Maybe more.
Wait- since when did she think of him as Han? He was Captain Solo, a smuggler who was only with her group for a short time. He wasn't even openly with the Rebellion! He wanted nothing more than to fly off with that reward and whatever else he got paid for.
Because he was a smuggler.
A scoundrel.
She hated him! Didn't she? Of course!
He was a no-good, two-bit, backstabbing rouge, the kind she had been warned about as a child. He was the highwayman in all the stories she'd heard as a little girl. He was the monster under her bed, the fiend in the closet, her own personal boogeyman.
But you weren't supposed to care for your boogeyman. You weren't supposed to hug them when he saved you. You weren't supposed to cling to him while they were rescuing you.
You weren't supposed to want to burst into tears when you locked him out in the freezing cold to certain death. You just didn't do those things.
But she did. And she didn't know why.
Ever since he had rescued her from the Death Star, he had picked fights with her. Calling her his annoying pet names, teasing her about her attitude and attire, and generally being an ass. She should have ignored him. She never did.
She wished she knew when she'd fallen in love with him.
She shook her head sharply- where had that ludicrous notion come from? She didn't love him! She couldn't! She could not love him, because he was a scoundrel, and a smuggler, and nothing she was looking for in a man...
...And because he had gone out to die in the snow, obliterating any chance she would ever have of falling in love with him. Because she did not love him. She did not.
She always was good at deluding herself. She could delude herself that all her grief was directed at Luke, towards the boy who had tried so hard to be something that could help save them all... She could delude herself that she felt absolutely nothing for Captain Han Solo.
She could delude herself that the wetness on her cheeks had been some ice falling from the ceiling and landing on her face.
She was so very good at deluding herself.
---------------------------------------------A/N: Long live Han and Leia! Best couple. Ever. Heh.
