Disclaimer: Nothing that is copyrighted belongs to me. Only myself & my fan character. And if by some weird twist of fate, this fic breaks any of this site's childish and unfair rules, please do the courteous thing and tell me in a review what I did wrong. If it doesn't ruin the artistic quality of the fic, I'll fix it ASAP. I'm usually on all day. At least give me a chance to fix the problem before reporting me.
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Pre-story Conversation
"Howdy!" I shouted, waving at the camera. "Thanks to a lost bout with my subconscious, I present to you, the loyal RP fans, my rendition of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. This will be a slash fic, which means two or more of our stars are gay. That's pretty much your only warning."
"Not another one, Boss!" Izzy groaned, slapping his forehead.
"Don't worry! You're not in this one!" I yelled at him before turning to the camera. "Anyway, this will be a slash fic with a twist. The twist will be discovered a little later. I think you're really gonna like this one!"
"Whatever. Let's start." My partner said, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Snow Otto and the Seven Other Guys
Once upon a time in sunny California, there lived a handsome king and his beautiful queen. They gave birth to a boy. The couple was ecstatic that they finally had a child. They named their son Otto. One day, a year after Otto was born; the queen died a terrible death, leaving the king and prince by themselves. For many years (I'm thinking fifteen), they lived peacefully. The king received a magical mirror some time after Otto turned sixteen. It was a round mirror surrounded with ebony wood. It was posted on a wall of the royal throne room.
Now the king, whose name was Ray, was known throughout the land as the most handsome man in existence. Because of this fact, he would normally consult his mirror for security reasons.
"Mirror, mirror on the wall," He would ask the mystical mirror. "Who's the most handsome of them all?" And in the mirror would appear the face of a mask.
"You, your majesty, are the most handsome of all." The mask would reply. And it went on like that until one day, six months after Otto's sixteenth birthday, King Ray approached the mirror.
"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most handsome of all?" The mask appeared again.
"I can not deny it." The mask started. "You are the ugliest man to walk the face of this earth!" Ray paled.
"Wh-wh-what?" He asked slowly.
"Prince Otto is the most handsome one in the land. He has all the guys swooning all over him."
Ray was shocked. There's someone who's more handsome than him? And it was his own son!.? Wait. "Guys?" That would mean that Otto is…GAY!.?.!.?.!.?.!.?.! Ray was outraged.
"Guards!" The king bellowed. Two men in black armor approached him and saluted. "Take my son deep into the woods and leave him there to starve!"
The guards saluted and went to Prince Otto's chamber. They bashed the door down and grabbed the boy, who was wearing roller blades and protective gear. The young prince tried to resist, but the guards were too strong. They overpowered him and knocked him out.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
When Otto woke up several hours later, he found himself deep in the woods in a clearing. Sunlight poured down on him. He groaned as he stood.
"Man! What was that all about?" He asked no one in particular. As I said before, Otto was wearing roller blades and protective gear. He was also wearing a regal outfit. It was basically a yellow shirt and red jean shorts.
°PAUSE!°
"That's regal!.?" Izzy shouted at me.
"You didn't let me finish!" I retorted.
°UNPAUSE!°
The shorts and shirt were lined with gold and the prince was wearing a cape that was blue on the outside and red on the inside. Although he was a prince, he wasn't wearing a crown. He was also wearing a pair of green-tinted sunglasses. Otto sat on the grass and sulked.
"Raymundo must've gone aggro on me for some reason! Now I'm all alone in these woods with no food." His stomach growled. "I can sure go for a burger or something right about now…"
It was then that a wonderful smell wafted past Otto's nose. He sniffed the air and bolted up.
"Oh man! An extra large pizza with everything on it! Dude!" Otto sniffed the air some more before pointing to his left. "That way!"
In front of the hungry prince was a paved road. He skated up the road.
A few hours later…
"Ugh! How far is that pizza place!.?" Otto groaned. He was starting to get tired of skating and his hunger was seriously getting to him. His quest ended a few moments later as he reached a cottage.
"This is a pizza place?"
With a shrug, he walked up to the door. Otto put an ear to the door. He heard several voices chatting animatedly. He knocked on the door, which stopped the voices. The door opened and a gasp was heard. Poor Otto was extremely pale and exhausted from his hunger.
"Please help…" He said weakly before he fainted.
"Oh great." A female voice sighed.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
"He's cute." Otto heard a female voice giggle.
"You kidding? He's hot!" A male voice yelled.
"He's ugly if you ask me." Another female voice grumbled.
"You think everybody's ugly." Another male said in a matter-of-fact tone.
"He's beautiful, brah." A third male said.
"I can't believe you three are going nuts about this guy! He's way too old for any of you!" A third girl yelled.
"Yeah! He's also unconscious, for crying out loud!" A seventh voice said. It was the voice of the same girl Otto heard when he fainted.
"Uhhh…wha?.?.?" Otto groaned as he opened his eyes and sat up. He took off his sunglasses, rubbed his eyes, and put them back on.
What he saw amazed him.
"You guys are dwarfs."
Indeed. In front of Otto stood seven kids. They were much smaller than he was. They were all wearing pointy hats. Well six of them, anyway.
"Welcome to our home." The dwarfs said cheerfully. Otto looked around the cottage.
It was just one big room. There were seven beds on one side. A mini kitchen with a table that had seven chairs in another side. A TV with a sofa big enough for seven people on one end. And a place to hold seven sets of skating gear at the last end. Otto turned to the dwarfs.
"Thanks for inviting me into your home." He started. "What are your names?"
"I'm known as Smarty, but I prefer to be called Sam." One of the dwarfs said, walking forward. He was wearing a pair of glasses and had blond hair. He was also kinda round. He was the one Otto heard fourth.
"I'm Beautiful, but call me Clio." One of the tallest dwarfs said, walking forward and winking at Otto. She was wearing a yellow mini skirt and a green shirt. She was the first voice he heard.
"The name's Angry, but call me Mackenzie or else!" The smallest dwarf yelled, shaking a fist. She seemed to be five or six and the third voice he heard.
"I'm Silly, but call me Keoni." The owner of the fifth voice said, grasping Otto's hands. The prince wasn't able to look at the dwarf because he was trying to hide his blush.
"Keoni! Leave him alone!" Another dwarf yelled. Keoni let go of Otto and backed up. "Sorry about that. I'm Sporty, but call me Trish." She was the owner of the sixth voice. Otto noted that she was wearing a shirt with the Ying Yang symbol on it.
"I'm Calm, Cool, and Collected, but you can call me Reggie." The next dwarf said as she walked forward. She had purple hair and was as tall as Clio. Otto recognized her as the owner of the seventh voice and the one who found him. He nodded.
"I'm Otto. Pleased to meet ya, but where's the last dwarf?"
"Right here." The last dwarf answered, walking forward with a video camera in his hands. He had the second voice. "I'm the cameraman of the group, but call me Twister."
°PAUSE!°
"HOLD IT!.!.!" Izzy interrupted.
"What now!.?.!" I sighed exasperatedly.
"Twister's one of the seven dwarfs?"
"Yep."
"But the only yaoi pairing that exists for this show is Otto/Twister!"
"Exactly! That's the twist I was talking about earlier, or half of it, I should say. This ISN'T an Otto/Twister fic."
"If Twister's one of the dwarfs, then who's Prince Charming?" Izzy scratched his head.
"That's the other half of our twist. You gotta wait til the end to find out." I replied, winking. "Oh! Before I forget, Otto is older than the dwarfs (the dwarfs are their official ages, whatever they are) and Reggie & Otto aren't related."
°UNPAUSE!°
Otto noticed that unlike the other six dwarfs, Twister wasn't wearing a pointy hat. He was wearing a striped hat that was backwards. He also had orange hair.
"What's with the camera?" Otto asked.
"I use my camera to film the group shredding." Twister replied, pointing his camera at Otto.
"You guys shred?" The prince asked. The others nodded.
"All of us except for Mackenzie. She's still learning." Sam said.
"You should talk lame-o!" Mackenzie said with her arms crossed. Sam blushed as the others laughed.
"What were you doing out in the woods by yourself?" Reggie asked. "It's way too dangerous out there."
"I was the prince of the land." Otto started sadly. "For some reason, my dad tossed me out and left me in the woods to starve to death." He sniffled.
"How'd you find us, cuz?" Keoni asked.
"I smelled the pizza that you guys were cooking and I skated here to hopefully get a bite to eat."
"You're in luck. We were just about to eat." Clio said as she walked into the kitchen. She opened the oven and pulled out an extra large pizza with everything on it and put it in the middle of the table. Otto drooled at the sight as his stomach grumbled. Everybody else laughed.
"Also lucky for you, we almost always have leftovers." Trish said.
Everybody went to the table. Keoni and Twister sat on either side of Otto and Clio sat across from him. The prince was blushing furiously as he noticed the three dwarfs staring at him.
"You guys really need to get a hobby!" Reggie yelled.
"Yeah. Take a picture, why don't ya!" Mackenzie agreed.
The pizzas were served and everybody ate.
"So why don't you guys live in the city?" Otto asked after everyone finished eating.
"Dwarfs aren't allowed to live in the city." Twister replied. The others looked at the floor.
"Oh. That's lame." Otto said, feeling guilty. The others looked up.
"Don't worry about it, cuz!" Keoni said cheerfully. "Even though we can't live in the city, we are allowed to visit it."
"Yeah. We always go to the local skate park so Twister can film us skating." Reggie said.
"Is that all you guys do?" Otto asked. "Sounds cool."
"That's not all." Trish said. "We also go to town to shop for food and stuff."
"Say, you don't have any place to stay, do you?" Sam suddenly asked Otto. The prince shook his head. "Why don't you stay with us?"
"I don't want to bother you." Otto said.
"It's no problem!" Twister, Keoni, and Clio said quickly. Everybody else looked at them with an eyebrow raised. The trio blushed and sank in their seats.
"Right… Anyway, there isn't another house around for miles." Reggie said. "It's honestly no problem. We got a sleeping bag you can use."
Otto sighed and smiled at the dwarfs' generosity.
"Alright. I'll stay." He said. Twister, Keoni, and Clio cheered. Otto put his head in his hands.
'What have I gotten myself into?' He thought.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
A few months have passed since King Ray banished Prince Otto to the woods. The evil king was bouncing around his castle merrily.
"Oh happy day!" He sang. "It's been so long since I tossed out my good-for-nothing son. He must surely be dead and I will reclaim my throne as the most handsome man ever to live." He approached the magic mirror. "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most handsome of all?"
The mask appeared.
"Whoo! I can't even look at you!" The mask yelled, turning away. "Prince Otto, who skates with the seven dwarfs and is alive & well, is still better looking than you."
"He's still alive!.?.!" Ray yelled with wide eyes. He stomped the floor in rage. He then got an idea. "I know. I'll just kill him. That way, I'll make sure the job gets done and I'll be the best looking." He laughed evilly as he tried to think up a plan.
Elsewhere…
"Go Otto!" The dwarfs yelled.
They were at the local skate park watching Otto rip it up on the half pipe with his board. The dwarfs had gotten him a new one. Twister captured Otto doing flips and other stunts in the air with his camera. Mackenzie was trying to get the hang of riding on a board. Clio was grinding a rail with her blades. Keoni was too busy watching Otto to do any skating. Reggie, Sam, and Trish were skating around in the bowls.
Otto has gotten along pretty well with his seven friends. In the past few months, he has helped the dwarfs with shopping. The trip was made much easier, thanks to the extra set of hands. Because the prince was so good on a skateboard, Twister would almost always film him and enter the footage in contests the town runs. They've won quite a few times. Otto would also help out the dwarfs by protecting them against attack from other humans. The dwarfs would help out Otto by protecting him from the woodland creatures of the forest. It was basically a mutually beneficial relationship.
After the group skated for while, a man wearing a black cloak approached the skate park. It was the evil King Ray. He had a package in his hands. He chuckled evilly as he walked to a shady part of the park.
'Once I give Otto this poisonous pair of sunglasses, he'll die.' The king thought with a grin as he opened the box. He pulled out a golden pair of sunglasses. 'He won't be able to resist them.'
He soon saw Otto skating by. He held out a finger and signaled for Otto to come over. Otto looked around. None of the dwarfs were seen. With a shrug, he hopped off the board and walked over to the old man.
"Hello, son." Ray said, sounding like an old man.
"Hello." Otto said, trying to sound polite. Ray held out the sunglasses.
"I couldn't help but notice that your sunglasses are scuttled and scratched." He said. Otto got in a thinking pose. He has worn these sunglasses for a long time. They must be in terrible disrepair. Not to mention the old man's sunglasses are cool-looking...
"How much for them?" Otto asked, gesturing to the gold sunglasses. The old man gave a wide grin.
"For you, my boy, five dollars."
Otto fished into his pocket and pulled out a crisp five dollar bill. He handed it to the old man, who then handed the poison sunglasses. Otto took off his normal sunglasses and put on the gold ones. As soon as he did, he fell backwards dead.
"Yes!" Ray said as he giggled and ran back to his castle.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
"Otto! Are you still here?" Sam asked as he walked around. He soon noticed the older boy and gasped. "Guys! Come quick!" The other six dwarfs came to where Sam was standing. They also gasped at the sight.
"Oh man. What happened?" Reggie asked.
"I don't know. I just found him like this." Sam replied. Twister, Keoni, and Clio bent down over the prince.
"Who could've done this?" Clio asked, close to tears.
"Whoever did this will pay." Twister hissed, letting his tears fall.
"Man, what a bunch of crybabies." Mackenzie grumbled.
"Hey. What's with those sunglasses?" Trish asked, noticing Otto's new sunglasses.
"They look cool." Keoni said, picking the glasses up.
Instantly, Otto woke up.
"My head… What happened to me?" He asked as he sat up and put on his old sunglasses. Reggie took the gold glasses from Keoni and inspected them.
"Just as I thought. These glasses were poisoned." She said. She tossed the sunglasses on the floor and stomped on them.
"Who did this to you?" Twister asked.
"It was this old man wearing a black hood." Otto replied.
"The king must've found out you're still alive and is after your life." Sam said.
"Come on. We're going home." Reggie said.
The other dwarfs and Otto nodded. They left the skate park.
At the castle…
"Oh mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most handsome of them all?" Ray asked cheerfully.
"Still ain't you." The mirror replied bluntly. Ray stared wide-eyed. "Prince Otto's still alive." Ray slapped his head.
"Ok. New plan." He got in a thinking pose. He soon snapped his fingers and put on an evil grin. "I got it!"
The next day at the skate park…
"Ok. Make sure you don't allow anybody to try to kill you." Reggie said to Otto. "We're gonna do some shopping. You stay here and skate a little bit." Otto shrugged.
"If you say so…"
"We'll keep you company!" Twister, Keoni, and Clio yelled. Otto blushed.
"Oh no you don't! You're coming with us!" Reggie yelled as she, Sam, and Trish grabbed the three and dragged them off, followed by Mackenzie.
"What a weird bunch." Otto said, shaking his head.
Today, he was wearing his blades. He skated around a bit until he saw a hand beckon him into the same shady area where he had his near-death experience yesterday. He cautiously skated to the area, where an old man wearing a red cloak was waiting.
"Hello sonny." The man said in a light voice.
"Do I know you, dude?" Otto asked, looking at the man suspiciously. King Ray backed up nervously.
"Of course not. I'm just a lonely peasant who wants to sell wares."
"Oh ok. As long you aren't trying to kill me." Otto said cheerfully.
°PAUSE!°
"He can't be that dense!" Izzy shouted incredulously.
"He is in this fic!" I yelled with a toothy grin.
°UNPAUSE!°
The "old" man pulled out a purple headband that had a gold crown embroidered on it.
"Wow…" was all Otto can say at the sight of the headband. It easily outclassed his old green one in every way. It even had a crown so that he can show his status. "How much?.! How much?.!"
"Ummm… five dollars?" Ray replied, raising an eyebrow.
Otto slapped a five dollar bill into his hand and grabbed the impressive headband. He took off his green headband and put on the purple one so that the crown was in the middle of forehead. Otto gave a yawn.
"Good night."
And he fell backwards again. Ray dusted his hands.
"This time, he better stay dead." He said as he ran to his castle.
Later…
"CRAP!.!.!" Reggie yelled as she and the dwarfs ran up to the fallen Otto. Like yesterday, the lovely-dovey trio bawled over the boy.
"This guy's really dumb, huh?" Mackenzie asked.
"Most likely." Sam said with a shrug.
"And now, the culprit!" Trish said dramatically, pointing to Otto's new headband. Keoni stopped crying long enough to notice the deadly accessory. His eyes lit up at the sight.
"Whoever's been doing this sure has good taste." He said as he picked the headband off Otto's head. Like yesterday, Otto woke up. He grinned sheepishly at the glaring Reggie.
"Who did it this time?" She asked with her arms crossed.
"An old guy wearing a red hood." Otto replied. Reggie slapped her head.
"Oh Otto! You're safe!" Twister, Keoni, and Clio yelled as they hugged Otto tightly. He started gasping for air.
"Mackenzie?" Sam said, pointing at the trio. The little girl grinned.
"Gotcha." She said as she walked towards the trio, punching her hand. The trio noticed her coming though and quickly separated. "Awww!.!.! I couldn't beat them up!" She cried.
Otto put his green headband back on.
"How many more times do we have to go through this?" Reggie asked. Otto held his hands up in defense.
"This was the last time, I swear!"
"Oh we'll make sure of it." Reggie said with an evil grin.
The dwarfs and Otto left the skate park.
At the castle…
"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most handsome of them all?" Ray asked.
"You know, you really need to be a little less sloppy." The mask said. "Your gay son is still alive!"
Ray's left eye twitched.
"WHAT THE HELL!.?.!.?.!.?.!.?.!.?.!" He roared. "What do I have to do to kill this kid?.!.?.!.?.!" He got in another thinking pose. "I got it! Screw the poison clothes. I'll just poison him with food instead!"
"And you didn't do this the first time because…?" The mask asked. The blond gave him an exasperated look.
"Shut up."
And with that, King Ray made his way down to the royal kitchen. The royal cook there gave him a salute when he arrived.
"Aloha, your majesty." The cook said cheerfully.
"Tito, I need you to make a Shack burger that's poisoned on one half of it, and clean on the other." Ray said. Tito raised an eyebrow.
"Mind if I ask why, bruddah Ray?"
"Actually, I do. Just do it!" Ray stormed out of the kitchen. "And make sure I know which side is safe!" Tito sighed.
"Poor guy's been going nuts since he tossed out Otto." He shook his head. "Guess I'd better get started on that burger. It'll be tough to get it right."
And so, he worked hard into the night. He called on some of the castle's servants to test out the burgers he made. The first few burgers were completely poisoned. Those poor servants croaked as soon as they took a bite. The next few batches were either poisoned or clean in a very small section of them. Tito was about to give up when he made the last batch. Those burgers were exactly what King Ray wanted. One half of each burger was poisoned and the other half was safe to eat.
The whole burger looked perfect. The buns were flaky sesame ones. The meat was cooked perfectly. The amount of ketchup and pickles were just right. No one would suspect that they could die from taking one lousy bite. Remembering which half was poisoned and King Ray's instructions, Tito put green food coloring on the safe half of the burger. He put the burger in a case (not Styrofoam, of course) and walked to the throne room, where King Ray was waiting patiently.
"Took you long enough." The king said flatly as he took the case. He cringed when he took a look at the burger. "Tito! This burger looks rotten on one end!"
"Your majesty, the green end is the safe side. You wanted me to allow you to know which part was safe." Tito defended in a respectful tone. King Ray's expression softened.
"Ah yes. So the green part is safe and the other part is poisoned?" Tito rolled his eyes in exasperation.
"You got it." Ray laughed evilly.
"Excellent." He said. "I'll be going now, Tito." He put on a green cloak to match the burger and left the castle.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
"Aw come on! Can't I go with you guys!.?" Otto protested. The dwarfs were getting ready to go out.
"Yeah! Can't he come with us?.!" Keoni, Twister, and Clio protested as well.
"NO!.!.!" Reggie yelled. "After two attempts on his life, you think I'm just gonna let him come with us to skate!"
"Just stay here, ok? You'll be safe." Sam said to the prince.
"But—" Otto started.
"You're gonna stay here or I'm gonna give ya a fat lip!" Mackenzie yelled, shaking her fist. Otto backed down.
"We'll stay here then." Otto's personal fan club said. The prince suddenly got nervous at the prospect of those three being in the same house with him alone.
"There's plenty more right here if you don't come with us!" Mackenzie threatened. The trio grumbled as they started skating to town. The others started to leave as well.
"And don't let anybody in, regardless of what color cloak they're wearing!" Trish said before she closed the door. Otto sighed and locked the door.
"I wonder what's there to do around here."
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Otto was bored. That's all there was to it. He played all the Tony Hawk games in the dwarfs' collection and watched all of the videos Twister made of him and the rest of the group. He even endured watching talk shows about women cheating on their husbands…with other women and kids who wouldn't obey their parents. He was dead bored…and hungry.
"I'm bored!" The prince proclaimed. "And hungry! Let something interesting happen!.!.!"
Outside…
"It took forever, but I finally found where he's staying." King Ray panted as he walked up the road to the dwarfs' house. "Why did it have to be so far though?"
He walked up to the window and grinned when he saw Otto sitting in front of the TV. He pulled out the half-poisoned Shack burger and walked up to the door. He knocked on it.
"Sorry dude, but I can't let anybody in." Otto's voice was heard through the other side. Ray gave a light groan, but grinned as he heard Otto's stomach growl.
"Not even for a little bite?" He asked, holding the burger to the peep hole. Ray's grin widened as he heard the rapid sound of locks opening at a fast pace.
"Gimme, gimme!" Otto yelled as he opened the door and reached out for the burger. He stopped himself though. "Hold it! I'm not gonna fall for that one!" He chuckled. Ray slapped his head, but quickly put on an evil grin.
"How about I split it in half to show you that it's safe?"
"Alright." Otto replied with his arms crossed. "But you get the green half." He put on a defiant grin. Ray grinned at how easy this was gonna be.
"As you wish."
And he took out a plastic butter knife. He applied it to the center of the burger and cut right along the delicate line of life and death. Ray picked up the green half of the burger and, after a moment's hesitation, ate the whole thing. He chewed a bit and then swallowed. Both of them waited for something to happen, but nothing did. Ray sighed with relief.
"Hmmm… I guess it's safe after all." Otto said as he took the uncolored half. Like Ray, he ate it whole, but as soon as he swallowed, he fell backwards dead.
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!.!.!.!.! Now let's see those dwarfs save him this time!" Ray laughed as he raced to his castle. When he got to the throne room, he was panting and sweating badly.
"Oh, back already?" The mask in the mirror asked. It was reading a newspaper.
"Cut the wisecracks." Ray started tiredly. "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most handsome of them all?"
"Keep that up and you won't even come close to becoming Mr. Universe." The mask replied. Ray shot him a glare. "Alright, alright! Anyway, the boy's dead, so congrats. You're the most handsome man in existence again."
"Score!" Ray said, jumping around happily.
Later…
"Can't turn my back for a couple of hours, huh?" Reggie sighed at the sight of Otto lying on the floor.
"I told you we should've stayed with him!" Twister, Keoni, and Clio yelled.
"Yeah right. We all know what would've happened if we left you three with him." Sam said. The trio blushed.
"Just see what did it this time and yank it off. Me and my fists are gonna have a word with him." Mackenzie said, punching her left hand.
"Uh-oh…" Trish started. "I don't see anything out of the ordinary."
The dwarfs looked all over Otto. His sunglasses and headband were normal as well as the other clothes he was wearing. The dwarfs' looks turned to those of despair.
"He must've been fed something poisonous." Clio stated, tears welling in her eyes.
"He's really gone this time…" Twister said. He, Keoni and Clio started to cry.
All of the seven dwarfs took off their hats and observed a moment of silence for their friend.
"Well now what?" Sam asked Reggie after the moment ended.
"There's nothing more we can do. We'll have to bury him." Reggie replied.
"He still feels warm." Keoni observed. He had the back of his hand against Otto's cheek. It was red with life despite the fact the prince wasn't breathing.
"He's right." Clio said as she put a hand against Otto's other cheek.
"That's weird." Twister said as he felt Otto's forehead. "If he's dead, how can he still feel warm?"
"I have no idea." Trish said, turning to Reggie. "But we can't just bury him."
"Yeah." Reggie agreed. "What do you suggest?"
"Make a glass coffin?" The other dwarfs answered with unsure tones. Reggie shrugged.
"Alright. Anybody know how to though?" The other dwarfs shrugged as well.
"I got it." Sam said. He pulled out his laptop and connected to the internet. In seconds, he was on eBay. "We'll just buy one. How much does everybody have?"
Everybody pulled out their money. Mackenzie had five cents and an old tooth, Twister had a five dollar bill, Keoni had a few singles, Clio had a twenty, Sam had a ten, Trish had a couple of fives, and Reggie had a few quarters. Sam groaned.
"You guys are lucky glass coffins aren't in this year." He said as he turned back to the screen.
"Oh yes." Reggie said with sarcasm. "What other group of dwarfs would actually sell a glass coffin for royalty to be buried in?"
"Apparently, the group selling this particular coffin." Sam replied.
The other six dwarfs walked up to the screen. The only glass coffin for sale was a used one. Its description said that it was used for a princess that got killed by eating a poison apple. The princess was brought back to life though.
"How?" Twister asked.
Unfortunately, the group selling the coffin ran out of room, so the answer was never found. They all groaned.
"Guess we buy it and hope that whatever saved that princess saves Otto." Keoni said.
The minimal bid for the coffin was five dollars. Sam put in a low bid of exactly that. Long story short, after a heart attack and a half having a bidding war with another person, the dwarfs won the coffin. It was sent to them through same-day delivery, which meant it arrived two stinkin' days after they won. The coffin was half gold and half glass.
The dwarfs carefully placed Otto inside the coffin. They placed the coffin on top of a tree trunk and prayed. Suddenly, the sound of wheels rolling against concrete pierced the silence in the woods.
"It's him." Sam said as they all stood up.
"It's that time already?" Trish asked.
"Man, a year passed that fast?" Clio asked.
"I'm not in the mood for him." Mackenzie growled.
"Who is?" Twister asked.
"I'll deal with him." Reggie said, standing up.
"We're right behind you." Keoni said.
"Far behind." Twister remarked.
"Oh yes. I feel real safe now!" Reggie replied with sarcasm.
A skateboard soon arrived right by them. It was being ridden by the prince of the neighboring kingdom.
"Hey dorks!" The prince yelled with a teasing voice.
"Hello Prince Lars…" The dwarfs droned with little emotion.
°PAUSE!°
"You didn't." Izzy growled, narrowing his eyes.
The camera faced me. I was wearing an angel costume.
"Why Izzy, what could you possibly mean?" I asked with an innocent grin.
"Cut the crap! What's with Lars?.!"
"Nothing, except he happens to be the second half of our twist." I gave him a silly grin.
"You mean you were serious in that last fic!.?.!.?.!.?.!" He yelled with wide eyes. I glowered at him.
"Just for that, I'm gonna make you gay in the next yaoi fic I write."
"No!" He screamed desperately. "I'll be good!"
"That's better." I turned to the camera. "By the way, Twister and Lars aren't related in this fic either. Also, Lars is nineteen."
°UNPAUSE!°
"What do you want, Lars?" Reggie asked with ice in her voice. Lars just laughed at her attempt to be threatening.
"You know our deal, woman." The prince started. "You seven give me all your cash every year and I leave you alone."
"We're busy. Come by tomorrow." Twister said as he walked up.
"Busy with what, shrimp?" Lars asked, glaring at him.
"We're in mourning." Sam said. Lars' expression softened a little.
"For who?"
"Our friend." Keoni said, gesturing to the coffin.
"What happened?" Lars asked.
"He got killed by his dad." Trish said.
"His dad?" The brunet raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah! His good-for-nothing father got him poisoned!" Clio yelled. More tears threatened to fall.
"So just leave before I have to get rough!" Mackenzie yelled, getting teary eyed herself.
"Now hold it! As prince of my kingdom, I have to pay my last respects. It's my duty." Lars said as he walked past the dwarfs. He reached the coffin and blushed as he laid eyes on Otto.
"He's beautiful."
"That's what I said the first time I saw him." Keoni said. "I think he looks most cute when—"
"NOT NOW!.!.!" The other dwarfs yelled. Keoni backed down.
"Hey, his face looks red. Are you sure he's dead?.!" Lars asked.
"Of course he's dead! He ain't breathing!" Reggie replied. Lars thought for a moment, then put on a grin.
"I don't know… Maybe I should get a closer look."
He lifted the glass lid.
"He's not gonna do what I think he's gonna do, is he?" Trish asked with wide eyes.
"Sure looks like it." Sam said with the same expression.
Lars fully opened the lid and knelt by Otto. He cupped the younger prince's face in his hand. His face felt warm to the touch.
"I knew it." Lars whispered to the other boy. "You're not dead. Just in a coma. You just need something to wake you up."
He closed his eyes and lowered his head towards Otto. He firmly planted his lips on the other boy's.
"EWWWWWWW!" The dwarfs yelled at the act of necrophilia.
Lars kept his lips on Otto's for quite some time before he rose. Otto's eyes fluttered open.
"Huh? What happened?" He sputtered.
"WHY THE HELL DIDN'T WE DO THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE!.?.!.?.!.?.!.?.!.?.!.?.!" Twister, Keoni, and Clio yelled.
Otto noticed Lars.
"Who are you?" He asked. Lars smiled warmly.
"I'm Prince Lars and I guess I saved you from whatever poison you ate." He held Otto's hand gently. "What's your name?" Otto blushed.
"I-I'm Prince Otto. Thanks for helping me."
"Uhhh… This'll sound a little weird, but do you want to come with me to my castle? I promise that you'll be safe from whoever's been trying to kill you." Otto nodded.
"I'd like that, but what happened to the dwarfs?"
"We're right here." The dwarfs said. Otto hopped off the coffin and walked over to them. Lars followed.
"I guess everything's ok now?" Sam asked.
"Yeah. I'm going with Lars to his kingdom. Hopefully I'll be safe there." Otto replied. Twister, Keoni, and Clio's eyes widened.
"We'll miss you." Sam, Reggie, Trish, and Mackenzie said. The other three dwarfs started crying.
"What's the matter?" Otto asked them.
"It's just that—" Keoni started.
"We never—" Clio added.
"Got a—" Twister said.
"Ahhh… Say no more." Otto said.
He bent down and gave each of them a kiss on the cheek. They held their cheeks where he kissed them.
"I'll never wash this cheek again…" The trio sighed as they blushed. Otto turned and walked back to Lars.
"Well, I guess we'll be going now. Hope you guys can manage without me." He said as he put on his blades.
"Hey! We managed quite nicely before you came along!" Reggie said with good nature.
"Ready?" Lars asked, grasping Otto's hands and giving him a quick kiss.
"You bet." Otto replied. Lars got on his skateboard and the new couple skated off, hand in hand, into the sunset.
THE END
°EPILOGUE°
A few years after Otto left, most of the dwarfs started to date. Twister and Keoni got over Otto's absence and are now a couple. They had their ups and downs, but they've never been happier. Reggie and Sam got together as well. The other dwarfs didn't quite understand what they saw in each other, but they supported the couple nonetheless. Trish ran off to marry Prince Trent of New Zealand. Regretfully, the only two who didn't get with anybody are Clio and Mackenzie.
King Ray tried desperately to get Otto after he heard that his burger plan backfired. After about twenty failed attempts, he decided to pursue trying to be the best in other things. He tried basket weaving, ballroom dancing (Clio excelled in that), being a huge grouch (Mackenzie had him beat there), and being the best pokémon trainer (don't ask). Everything failed.
And what about Otto?
He couldn't be happier! A loving boyfriend, a castle full of friendly people. He's living the good life. The life he was meant to live in the first place. The life everybody's meant to live.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Post-Story Conversation
The scene opened in the studio. I was standing along with Izzy, Otto, and Lars.
"Whew… Glad that's over with." I said, taking in a breath. "I was trying to go for humor in that story, but I guess it just didn't come. Or it did, but in very, very small batches. Anyway…" I grabbed a clipboard. "Let's see here. I wrote possibly the first ever Lars/Otto fic in existence, accomplished writing Otto/Twister, Otto/Keoni, and Otto/Clio fluff in one sentence, and did some Twister/Keoni and Reggie/Sam for effect. All in a day's work, right Izzy? Izzy?"
I turned to Izzy, who gave me a weirded out look. I raised an eyebrow.
"Otto?"
I faced the redheaded skater, who had the same look as Izzy. I started to get nervous.
"Uhhh… Lars?"
But the brunet in the gray hat was no help either. He gave the same look.
"W-why are you guys looking at me like that?" I asked as I backed up.
Izzy, Otto, and Lars stared at me with wide, unblinking eyes.
"N-now guys, I'm sure we can work this out."
Izzy, Otto, and Lars still looked like they would attack! I turned and ran for it.
"MOMMY!.!.!.!.! THE MEAN KIDS ARE OUT TO GET ME BECAUSE I MADE THEM GAY!.!.!.!.!.!.! AHHHHHHHH!.!.!.!.!.!"
"Th-that…" Izzy started.
"That was…" Lars continued.
"That was…" Otto grinned. "Not so bad."
"Yeah." The brunet in the gray hat agreed. "It was actually kinda fun. I can't wait to do it again!"
"Why wait?" The redhead asked with a sly grin.
"Well whaddya know, they liked it…" Izzy commented before turning to where I was moments ago. "Hey Boss, they wanna do another one!"
He noticed that I was gone and scratched his head.
"Wonder where he went…" He shrugged and turned to Otto and Lars. "Anyway guys, I don't know where the boss went, so—"
To his surprise, Otto and Lars were making out on the floor! Their hands went everywhere and I mean EVERYWHERE!.!.! Izzy's eyes widened.
"Ya know, I'm not as much of a yaoi fan as the boss is, but I gotta get that on film!" He turned to the camera. "Well, that's our fic for today. I gotta go get a camera. See ya!"
He ran off, leaving Otto and Lars to their business.
