Thank you for the alerts and reviews on the first story in this 'verse. It really warms my heart. I've decided to make this a series of related one-shots for now. Still haven't seen 2x15 so this is AU after 2x14 again. Enjoy!
Staring into the blackness of the night, she inhaled the crisp air deeply, trying to clear her mind for once. She was still amazed by the difference of fresh air compared to the stale recycled stuff she grew up with on the Ark. It calmed her, coming out here in the middle of the night, away from demands and responsibilities and reminders of things to come.
"You shouldn't be out here alone," Raven told her quietly as she came to sit next to her on the log.
"I'm not alone – there's four guards in the trees."
"They're just for show, Lexa knows you can take care of yourself."
Clarke didn't answer, just leveled her gaze again. Long moments passed before Raven broke the silence, frustrated she was losing sleep the night before what would be a very long day.
"Ok, I give. What's going on?"
"Nothing - I just needed some space. Everyone in that tent was making me feel like we were back on the Ark, always crowded for space."
"It's just one more night. And you were the one who was all like 'We have to honor the ground's traditions, we're no longer in the sky'. Don't complain now just because you didn't really know what you were getting yourself into."
"I know, Raven. I know what I said. And no one but you has heard me complain. I just didn't know it would take this long."
"And now that it's here, you're scared. I get it." More silence, more of Raven's fidgeting.
"She loves you, right? This ritual, this following tradition, is for everyone else. To unite the people. You love each other."
"I don't know. We haven't exactly had a lot of time to talk."
"But before the battle, you two were close."
"I thought we were and then she betrayed us. How can I just let that go?"
"And she came back, too, didn't she? Did you forget that part?"
"How am I supposed to trust her? How do I know she won't tell me one thing and do another when I'm not looking? How is this supposed to be a marriage?"
"I don't know, Clarke. I don't exactly have a lot to go on here either. And Lexa won't ever be my favorite person after Finn, but she's come through every other time. I have to believe she wouldn't do something like that again. And so do you."
"Your friend is correct in her conclusion," a firm voice from their right joined in, making both girls feel foolish for being out in the open unarmed, vulnerable to attack despite the guards.
Lexa nodded to Raven, then focused her attentions on Clarke.
Raven sighed and stood, knowing she had been dismissed. Before she went back to the tent that had been home for the wedding party the last week, she hugged Clarke tightly.
"You'll be okay, Clarke. I promise."
Watching the engineer walk away, Lexa weighed her words carefully.
"Will you walk with me?"
"Are you sure it's okay for us to be alone? We haven't so much as touched in the last three months."
"My guards will make sure tradition is honored. But we must speak, so please walk with me. It's a beautiful night."
"Yeah, okay."
They fell into step, the familiarity of walking next to each other through the woods not forgotten. Though this time they weren't marching toward a war with no sure outcome, or away from a missile, or toward peace talks. They ended up at the Ark, still home to some of the Sky People, though many parts were being repurposed in the new settlement being built just up the hill. Even the fence had been taken down and moved, to offer protection for the united tribes, not to protect one from the other.
The ceremony and feast tomorrow would only further cement what had already begun.
Finally, Lexa spoke. To the untrained ear, she sounded controlled as ever, but Clarke could hear the uncertainty she so carefully tried to mask.
"Why did you propose a marriage if you harbor such doubts. It's been months now."
"We both know there were tensions brewing. The alliance was weak and now it's stronger than ever."
"There could have been other ways."
"Nothing as permanent as this."
"I could have united with someone else. Even had a child, began a legacy from both the sky and the ground. It would have taken longer, yes, but it would have worked. My generals suggested it and I was considering their advice."
"I know. Kane told me Indra asked if he was bound with anyone from the sky. Really, Lexa, him?"
"He is your highest ranking male leader and it would have made sense. But it would have been my decision and no one else's."
"And would you have? Would you have joined with Kane?"
Lexa sighed, wondering if all Sky people were this frustrating or if Clarke was a special case. Sitting down, she looked up at Clarke, completely visible in the bright light of the moon. Her people viewed the full moon as a good omen, a blessing upon a union. If the union was between a man and a woman, it would mean children, though her own obviously would not be so blessed. The Commander's spirit would move to another outside of their family and Lexa's line would end. So would Clarke's.
"I think you know the answer to that question, Clarke."
"I don't, I really don't. All I know is that I couldn't breathe when he told me. That I thought I'd already lost you when I'd never really had you. And no matter how mad I was I couldn't not try. Little did I know tradition would take over my life for the next three months and we'd never be allowed alone again."
"You chose to honor our ways. The people respect you all the more now."
"Lexa, for heaven's sake – give me a real answer. I want to move past you leaving me at the Mountain, I want to try to make the best out of what we have to do, but you make it out to be all for the people. Never for us. What would you have done had I not asked first?"
Clarke knelt in front of her fiancé, pleading for honesty with words and eyes. She needed to know. Lexa hesitated, knowing tradition was about to be left behind but Clarke needed reassurance more than the old ways needed to be honored. She stood and took Clarke's hand, raising her voice and issuing a command in her native tongue. The hidden guards came forward, bowed, and then made their way back to the Commander's tent.
"Why did you do that?"
"So we can be alone. I know you value privacy."
"But the rules…"
"We are getting married tomorrow at the first light. Which is but six hours from now and many hands will start preparing the feast sooner than that. Tradition has been honored and I want to be alone with you for just a moment as well. You are not the only one who has suffered in silence."
If Clarke had been with anyone else, she would have called them bashful right now. But this was Lexa and she was as poised in her shyness as she was in everything else.
"You are right, the alliance was precarious. I wanted to give you the space you asked for, but I had to consider other options as well. My people expect me to lead them well, but I honestly don't have experience leading at peace times. I was filled with indecision until you walked into my tent, cut your hand in front of my council and handed me the knife to do to my own."
Lexa took Clarke's hand in hers, the faint scar till visible under the moonlight and brought it to her lips for the lightest of kisses. Clarke trembled under her touch and she could only hope their wedding night would as sweet.
"I know you doubt my affection and my intention and my trustworthiness. But please believe when I say to you tonight I will never lie to you. I will never betray my vows. I will not let harm come to you as long as I draw breath. I will love you every day until my spirit departs and if there is an afterlife I will love you for eternity. I do not intent to mock this union by making it solely about peace. I will honor you as my wife, as my equal, as my partner. I will prove to you every day you can trust me, no matter how long it takes."
Clarke felt dizzy under the unexpected declarations. The blonde stared intently at the usually stoic warrior and for the first time in three months felt hope blossom in her chest. She exhaled loudly and a large smile appeared, unseen by Lexa for many weeks.
"You really mean all that?"
"With all my heart. Consider it a preview of my vows."
"There's more than what you just said? What could you possibly add?"
"You'll just have to show up in the morning, Clarke of the Sky People."
Clarke turned over Lexa's hand in hers and traced the silver line with her fingers before stepping into her soon-to-be wife and resting their foreheads together.
"I don't want to give my vows away, but thank you for telling me that," she whispered.
"Do you believe me?"
"I do. And I love you too."
She could feel Lexa grin even as she closed her eyes to savor the quiet moment they both knew couldn't last much longer. Though not technically part of the traditions, Lexa had requested their next kiss to be as a unioned couple. If they didn't return to camp now, Clarke wouldn't be able to keep her word.
Kissing the back of Lexa's hand quickly, Clarke stepped away from her.
"How about you escort me back to the bridal tent, then?"
"It would be my honor, Sky Princess."
Reviews? Prompts?
