Gibbs is standing there, in a black tuxedo, just like she always pictured. He's got that smile on his face, the one that's always been reserved for her.
"Well Abs, how do I look?"
But this isn't her fairytale, not her dream come true.
She swallows hard as she replies,
"You look great boss-man."
He doesn't take his eyes off her, "You did great putting this together."
She smiles, "Thanks. It worked out well, didn't it?"
"You always have been… Exceptional."
She leans forward and kisses him on the cheek, trying once again to stop the wrenching sadness from bubbling up.
Music begins playing, and Abby smiles at him once more before taking her seat next to Tony.
He pats her hand, and looks at her, "You going to make it?"
She nods, tears in her eyes, trying to wish them away. She doesn't want Gibbs to look over and see her crying, he'd stop the ceremony to ask what was wrong.
"Did you talk to him?" Tony's whispering now, trying to keep his voice low enough not to disturb the ceremony.
'He's happy now Tony. I couldn't ruin that. He's really happy."
"You're not."
This statement causes a tear to run down her cheek and she wipes it away as quickly as she can.
"I'll find happiness eventually. It will just take time."
The wedding party marches in, looking solemn but happy.
The music changes and everyone rises, watching as a very happy Hollis Mann steps into the room.
Ziva's quiet but incredulous voice reaches Abby's ears as the bride makes her way slowly down the aisle. "I still can not believe he chose to marry her."
McGee mumbles something in an effort to be quiet, and Ziva speaks again,
"I know, McGee, it is that idiotic sheep of a feather thing, which makes no sense to me, sheep do not even have feathers!"
Tony shushes Ziva, earning a glare and the four fall quiet as the minister begins speaking.
Abby closes her eyes, wishing she was anywhere but there, it is too painful for her to watch.
She wasn't going to attend, but Gibbs had asked her if she was going and the hopeful look in his eyes was too much for her to say no to.
Ziva leans across Tony to whisper to Abby, "You did not even plead your case to him?"
Abby opens her eyes to look at Ziva, "No, I decided it would be better for him if he never knew. He won't have to feel guilty." Ziva sits back in her seat and stares forward, watching the ceremony, obviously contemplating things.
Abby sighs, trying to ignore the pain that she's feeling as she watches Gibbs, her Gibbs, place a ring on Hollis' finger.
Time seems to be blurred as the ceremony moves forward and suddenly, Gibbs is leaning forward to kiss her, and it's all over.
"I now present to you, Mr and Mrs Jethro and Hollis Gibbs."
Everyone rises to clap as the new couple passes them, going out the door.
The reception is lovely, beautifully put together, compliments of Abby and Ziva who stepped in to help.
As people begin dancing, Tony pulls Abby onto the floor,
"I'm fine Tony, really."
He obviously disagrees with her, but he says nothing, continuing to dance with her.
"I figure if I dance with you for at least three dances, McGee will be either have found his way out of the hole he dug for himself or he'll be dead."
Abby laughs as she catches a glimpse of a very angry Ziva glaring at McGee who's looking sheepish and scared.
"You should help him."
"But it's fun watching it."
Abby rolls her eyes and steps away from Tony as the song ends,
"Go help him. You can dance with Ziva, I'm not feeling well. I think I'm going to go home early."
"You mean that new bar on eighth street?"
Abby grins at him,
"I'll take a cab home when I'm done, I promise."
He nods, "Call me when you get home, okay?"
His eyes are serious, and she can see the worry and concern in them.
"Of course." She turns and forces herself to find Gibbs and his new wife.
"I'm sorry you guys, I think I must have caught something, I'm not feeling very well. I'm really sorry."
Gibbs looks worried, but he knows she'll take of herself, so he hugs her and lets her go. "Bye Abs, take care."
"You too boss-man."
Abby says goodbye to Ducky and Palmer and makes her way to her car.
She debates on calling a cab to take her to the club, but decides she'd rather have to pick her car up at the club than at the church.
She drives to the club, finding a parking spot and going in. There are not many people there yet, but it's early in the evening and the club will fill up fast later on.
She sits at the bar and orders a drink, not wanting to bother with the easy stuff.
Tomorrow is Sunday and when she goes to work on Monday, she won't have to face Gibbs for at least two weeks and after that, hopefully she'll be ready to face him.
She sits at the bar and drinks slowly, crying. This isn't her usual bar, so no one knows her, and no one asks her what's wrong.
By the time she makes it home, she's hiccoughing steadily, her eyes are red from both crying and the alcohol and she can barely manage to hand the cab driver the amount of money she owes him.
He starts to tell to her to have a nice night then seems to change his mind and drives away.
She stumbles into her apartment and passes out on her bed, choosing to sleep in the regular king sized bed instead of the coffin shaped bed that holds too many memories.
When she wakes up, she has a dull headache and can't remember anything that happened at the bar. Unfortunately, she can remember the entire wedding.
Her cell phone is dead and when she plugs it in, she has enough missed calls to make her remember that she was supposed to call Tony.
She calls him, and waits for him to answer,
"Abby? You didn't call."
She can see his face now, a concerned angry as he waits for her to reply.
"I passed out on the bed when I got home. Sorry."
He sighs, "You okay?"
"Yeah. It just takes time. I've got two weeks. I'll be fine."
The two weeks pass by slowly, but she's not kind to herself, constantly reminding herself that Gibbs is married.
It helps, by the end of week one, she's almost come to terms with it, and when Gibbs strides back into the building, she's prepared and expecting Tony's almost frantic phone call.
"He's back."
"Thanks Tony."
Two weeks away with his new wife did him good, he's all smiles and joy as he walks into her office.
"Mornin' Abs."
"Good morning Gibbs."
It's almost awkward as they stand there, neither of them moving to touch the other. They're saved by his phone ringing and when he's done talking, he looks at her.
"Got a case."
She nods,
"I'll be waiting for samples and evidence."
He grins and leaves.
It still hurts, watching him go, thinking of the fact that he's married, but she knows that
she'll survive.
Well, that's it for part one. Look for part two coming soon. As always, let me know what you think. This one is particularly sad, but I think the series will end well.
