A/N: It took me a while to decide whether or not I wanted this posted up on this site. Usually I post little things like this separately someplace else. This is an idea I had for an AU story I would like to write sometime later for my fancharacter Mexico, or Manuel, since that's the mortal name I decided to give him. It was also written for two of my friends since they're the only ones who ship SpaMex with me. orz It's rather sad how much I adore this ship even though Mexico isn't a character yet but I can't help but like it. Oh, I was rambling. Ah ha, well anyway, this is like...somewhat of a preview and extremely shortened version of the overall story I would like to complete...someday. Though I posted this up because, well I don't want to write something if people aren't gonna read it, y'know? So yes, this is just to see if my idea is worth turning into a multi-chapter story since a fancharacter is the protagonist and usually stories with fancharacters as the central character don't...do so good. Well, I guess they can depending on the plot and character development, but in general... Okay I will shut up now.
Like I said, this story is basically an excerpt from the idea I have for an AU about SpaMex. This is written in first person and third person.
So hey. Have you ever been in a situation where you're surrounded by people who drive you up the wall, but you have no choice but to be in their presence anyway? Yeah I'm there right now. The name's Manny, and lemme tell you a little something about me. I'm 17, fresh out of high school, but as luck would have it, I can't afford college, my grades weren't exactly outstanding, and I have to support myself by myself. Wait that sounded redundant didn't it? Ah who cares. Anyway, I'd like to think of my life as unfortunate, but in a way where I see it as something that only makes me stronger with every passing day. Though most people who know me would just say I have bad luck, mala suerte, and I'm just apathetic about the shit that happens to me. Probably, yeah. But what can I do about it? Pfft, nothing, nothing at all, except make the best of it. There's no point in feeling sorry for myself. What's mala suerte? Weren't you listening? It means "bad luck" in Spanish, which apparently defines my life.
Mala suerte includes my good for nothing father leaving my mother when he found out she was pregnant with me. I don't know who he is, where he is, and I could care less about whether he's alive or not. Mala suerte includes my mother dying two years before I graduated high school due to an "unfortunate" car accident. Mala suerte includes that I literally had no other family but my mother in the United States, so I can't rely on anyone and I'm not about to go back to Mexico any time soon. Mala suerte includes me not being able to get accepted into college because of my grades and that for some reason I wasn't good enough or "didn't have exceptional skill" when it came to applying for a soccer scholarship. Mala suerte includes me not being able to keep a steady job because of the kinds of assholes I have to deal with as customers and as coworkers which causes my short fuse to be lit.
Mala suerte includes me falling deeply in love with my recent wealthy as fuck employer who one, already has a boyfriend, two, is at least seven years older than I am, and three, is a man.
Yep, all that's just gotta be nothing but mala suerte.
Okay, the academics maybe had something to do with my poor prioritization, but let's not get in to that right now. Trust me though, I'm one of the most cheerful people you'll probably ever meet, but there are just some things I can't ignore. This, the love sick thing, is one of them.
I suppose you wanna know how this all started. Well let's go back to when I first met my wealthy but bumbling idiot of a boss.
Manuel adjusted his apron in the kitchen, dreading to return into the dining room of the prestigious five star restaurant. One of his coworkers smiled at him and asked, "You don't wanna go back out there do you?"
"With the kind of snobs sitting at those tables? Hell no," he replied with a grin on his face. "They're so picky which I find dumb considering the food is basically the size of a coaster. I mean how much more do they want to take out of that stuff? They might as well eat air!"
His coworker chortled and said, "Manny, you never fail to make me laugh. With all the grumbling we do around here, you sure know how to put smiles on our faces."
"I dislike these people just as much as you guys, but there's nothing that can be done about it. Assholes will be assholes, and snobs will be snobs. Just make the best of it." He gave a shrug which caused the other man to chuckle once more.
"Uh oh…"
The two turned to a fellow waiter who looked out the door window and said, "Boss is coming, and he looks frantic." Just as he said that, the door practically slammed open, nearly smashing the on looking waiter.
"Staff!" he shouted, causing the waiters and waitresses to look at him attentively.
"I'm going to need somebody to wait table thirteen. My superior just came in with two of his friends and I want him to have the best kind of service possible!"
"Basically you want to impress him, right?"
"Sure Kevin, if that's what you'd like to call it. Anyway, I need one of you to wait their table and be at their beck and call!"
When nobody looked enthusiastic to step up to the task, the older man looked at Manuel and pointed. "Sanchez!"
"Yes sir?"
"You're the guy my customers love the best! Go out there and wait table thirteen for the evening!"
Manuel couldn't help but give a cocky grin. "Why wouldn't people like me? I'm charming, funny, and ridiculously handsome."
"Yes, and anymore self-praising will cause your ego to inflate so much that I can pop it like a balloon by demoting you."
"Ouch. Low blow."
"Just please go out there and wait their table…"
"Sure thing jefe.You can count on me!"
Manuel took some menus and walked out into the dining room, headed for table thirteen. It was a trio of men. One with blonde wavy hair that nearly reached his shoulders and stubble on his chin, another with white hair who had an obnoxious aurora about him to match his obnoxiously colored eyes, and the last had brown curly hair with a pleasant smile that seemed to give off some kind of sunny vibe. The blonde noticed his presence first.
"Ah, might you be the one Pierre said would wait our table this evening?"
He had a French accent. Of course, Manuel thought. "Yup, that would be me!" He handed out their menus. "I'm Manuel and I'll be your waiter for this evening!"
The man smiled warmly. "Well hello there Manuel. I'm Francis Bonnefoy, and this is Gilbert Beilschmidt and Antonio Fernandez Carriedo."
Manuel smiled at the other two as they returned the gesture and then said, "So can I start you three off with some beverages? I hear you're a very special guest this evening Mr. Bonnefoy."
"I take it Pierre brought out his ace in the hole to impress me hmm?" The expression Manuel gave told Francis everything. The latter chuckled and said, "If he's worried about losing his job, tell him not to. I just came to eat here because I haven't been to this restaurant in a while. Tell him I'll have the usual, for all three of us."
"Alright then, I'll be right back!"
Francis smiled. "Oh Pierre's employees are getting younger every year, but this one is by far the most youthful. He's practically a baby."
Antonio chuckled. "But he seems really friendly! I wonder how old he is though?"
"From the looks of it…" Gilbert said, a hand stroking his chin. "…not old enough to drink yet."
"How do you know?"
"I just do. Trust me."
Francis noticed Manuel heading back to their table with a very expensive bottle of wine and three glasses. "Alright, here you go sirs. The regular," he said as he served them. "I'll just leave this here in case you gentleman might want more later."
He took out his notepad and said, "So, are we ready to order now?"
Francis sipped his wine and said, "Yes. Just tell Pierre we'll have the usual dinner too."
"Wow, you must come here a lot for him to know what you want when you say 'usual'."
"But of course. I own this restaurant along with many others."
Manuel smiled. "Yes, I know. Well then, I'll come back with your basket of bread to snack on while your meal is being cooked."
He picked up their menus and returned to the kitchen. Pierre asked him, "So what did they order?"
"Mr. Bonnefoy said the usual."
Immediately Pierre commanded the chefs to make this 'usual' dinner. Manuel was honestly amused by his boss' panicky state, though he tried not to smile too much as he prepared the bread. He walked back out and approached the table, setting down the bread basket.
"Here we go," he said. "Now all that's left is your meal, which should arrive in a little while. Anything else I can get you three?"
"Say how old are you?" asked Gilbert.
He looked a bit surprised. "Why are you asking?"
"I'm just curious. You look really young."
"Oh, well I'm seventeen years old."
"Holy shit you're a high schooler?"
"No, I graduated about two months ago."
"Ah, I see. You saving up money for college or what?"
"…sure, you could say that."
"I bet your parents are proud to have a hard worker like you," Antonio said.
Manuel looked at him and hesitated before answering, "Yeah…"
"Hmm? Is something the matter?" he asked with concern in his voice.
"Oh, no, everything's fine! I just need to get back to the kitchen is all."
"That's okay! You're our waiter, so we can keep you here as long as we'd like, right Francis?"
The Frenchman swirled his glass and said, "Yes, and besides, the food will take a while. If Pierre gets upset with you, just tell him to bring it up with me. I can guarantee he'll leave you alone."
"Uh, well thank you sirs."
"So what do your parents do?" Antonio asked.
"…I don't have any."
The man looked at Manuel with a sympathetic expression. "I apologize…"
Manuel shook his head and with a wave of his hand said, "There's nothing for you to apologize about. My mother passed away a few months ago, and I never knew who my father was, nor do I care about knowing him."
"I'm sure he's missing out then. You seem like a wonderful son."
The teen smiled. "Thank you."
"So then you're living by yourself?"
This guy sure can talk, Manuel thought to himself. "Yeah, in an apartment building in downtown someplace. I cook for myself, do all my laundry, and clean my apartment frequently. I can't stand messes."
Antonio looked genuinely happy that the boy was talking to him. He enjoyed being around friendly people. "You're very independent!"
"Sure am! I also know how to do a lot of little things, like sew and garden," he said with a bit of pride. The Spaniard's eyes lit up just a bit then.
"That sounds interesting! I don't know how to garden, but I know how to sew a little." He took a sip of his wine and then looked up at Manuel making sure to have eye contact with the other. "You know, you make for very pleasant company. I think I'll come here more often, even if it's just to talk with you again!"
When Manuel locked eyes with the cheerful Spaniard, he seemed to tune out everything else around him. There was just something about his eyes that came off as enchanting, and before he knew it, Antonio blinked and asked, "Is there something on my face?"
Manuel shook his head and replied, "N-No, your face is perfectly fine sir."
Antonio smiled again and laughed. "Yes, so I've been told! You have a perfectly fine face too Manuel! Very handsome!"
It was the first time in a long time since Manuel blushed, even if he wasn't fully aware of it. Francis raised an eyebrow and smiled, he being used to Antonio getting these kinds of reactions out of people, but normally women. Seeing it come from a male was amusing.
"Uh…thank you." Manuel tapped on the menus with his fingers, not liking the awkward silence. "Well I'm going to go and check if your meals are ready."
As he was walking, Gilbert gave a chuckle. "Toni, you always strike up conversations with people and then embarrass them."
"It's not like I was lying. I wouldn't say he was attractive if it weren't true. Though now that I think about it, he's cute more than anything else. He's so short, and has big brown eyes!" he grinned. "Don't you think so Francis?"
The Frenchman smiled. "Antonio, you always did like the Latin ones the best. But I agree. Our waiter seems like a rather adorable young man."
He noticed Manuel returning with their meals. He set them down in front of them and said, "Well, here you go! It's fresh and delicious, so I hope you enjoy your meals! Let me know if you need anything else."
"We will," Gilbert said, digging into his food.
Manuel smiled again and walked back to the kitchen, still a bit uncomfortable from Antonio's remark. Not in a bad way, just that he wasn't told too often by adults that he was handsome. Everyone called him cute which only enraged him since he thought adorableness wasn't masculine.
The evening went on smoothly and Pierre thanked the heavens that Francis only had good things to say about his restaurant. His happiness was short lived though when a customer started to become upset with one of the newer waiters.
"I specifically asked for my meat to be raw, not grilled. What the hell are you doing?"
The flustered waiter timidly replied, "I'm sorry sir. I'll fix it right away."
"Yeah you better."
Walking back to the kitchen, the waiter looked discouraged and defeated as he tried to correct the order. Manuel was displeased.
"Don't worry so much about it Toris," he said.
"But it's just…"
"It's only your second day here. Everyone makes mistakes."
He sighed. "How do you do it Manny? I mean…you hardly get any horrible customers…"
Manuel smiled. "No, I do get some of the bitchy ones, but I just ignore them. I mean, they're only people and I never serve them twice if they decide to return. I can't deal with those kinds of people more than once."
"Why not?"
"Well it may not seem like it due to my good nature, buuut…I'm not a temperamental person, so I won't allow anybody to make me feel less than human, even if they're a customer."
"Can't you get fired for that?"
"…well yeah but—"
Toris didn't have time to listen to his explanation since the corrected order was ready. He walked back out and switched the meals.
"I'm sorry sir. It won't happen again."
The man looked at his plate and said, "Are you stupid?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"This isn't the meat I asked for!" he practically shouted. "Just want kind of service does this place have!"
"I apologize sir it's just…this is only my second day here—"
"No wonder you're a useless waiter!"
Toris could feel an arrow pierce his already low self-esteem. Manuel felt his anger levels rise and decided to step in, even though Kevin called after him, "Manny, stop! You're only going to make things worse!"
Francis and the other two sat by idly watching the scene unfold. Restaurant drama amused them more than it did the average person.
"Excuse me," Manuel interjected. "Is there a problem here?"
"And who the hell are you?"
"A more experienced waiter."
"Well then get me my correct meal."
With a gesture of his hand that indicated for Toris to give him his notepad, he scanned through the order for the man and his wife. He looked at it, and then at his plate. "Sir, there's a mistake."
"Yeah you bet there is—"
"No I mean with you."
"Excuse me?"
M-Manny what are you doing! Toris thought to himself, obviously panicked at this point.
"Yeah you see, the order was wrong the first time, but this second time it was correct. This was the kind of meat you ordered, so please do not harass your waiter. It's a very stressful and difficult job."
A vein could be seen on the man's head. "Well that's not my fucking problem, now is it? It's his for having such a shit life that he has to wait tables."
Toris noticed Manuel's eyebrows knit together and that the hands that fell at his sides started to turn into fists. Kevin watched from the kitchen worriedly. "Oh crap…he's getting angry…"
"Nobody asks to have a horrible life. Some people are just born into it."
He scoffed. "And I'm sure you'd know all about that, wouldn't you?"
Manuel narrowed his eyes. "Excuse me sir?"
"From the looks of you, you're a Mexican aren't ya?"
Taking a deep breath so as not to lose it completely, he asked between his teeth, "What does me being Mexican have to do with anything?"
"Well Mexicans are always poor, so of course you can sympathize with this guy."
"Not all Mexicans are poor. You know our race can have rich people in it too, not just white Americans."
He laughed. "Sure, if that will make you feel better. You may be poor, but very entertaining." The man took another sip of his wine.
"Entertaining?"
"Yes, don't you know what that word means? Or are you having trouble understanding because English isn't your first language?"
Manuel gave Toris back the notepad and said in a louder tone, "I'll have you know that I can speak English fluently, probably even better than you can."
"I doubt that. You have an accent."
"Because I wasn't born here. I came to this country with my mother at a young age in order to find a better life."
"And look where you are now."
That did it.
Manuel lifted the plate of food and said, "Riddle me this. What looks like a swine and is covered in slop, though acts like a snob because they're at the top?"
The man raised an eyebrow. "What?"
He got a face full of food, the plate falling into his lap, the glass of wine spilling all over the ground.
"You."
Kevin nearly shrieked from the kitchen as he watched the man stand up from his seat and scream, "What the fuck do you think you're doing!"
"What the fuck do you think you're doing being picky as hell and harassing a waiter when there are other hungry customers here!"
Trying to get the food off his face, the man said, "Of course. Just my luck. Not only did I lose stocks today, but now I have to deal with a dirty no good Me—"
He found his back meet the floor as Manuel pounced on him, grabbing him tightly by the collar.
"I fucking dare you to finish that sentence cabrón. Go ahead. See what happens."
Toris tried to stop him. "Manny don't—!"
"No, I'm tired of these fucking snobs disrespecting us waiters!" He looked at the man. "And I'm especially tired of racist dickheads like you thinking anybody who isn't of your status or skin tone is beneath you!"
"Well look how you're acting! Like a barbarian!" the man said. "All you Mexicans are the same! You just come here to get government money and not do anything productive!"
"WHAT!" He slammed him back on the ground hard, eliciting a cry from the other. "Let me tell you why that's bullshit. Us Mexicans are the ones who mow your fucking lawns, clean your fucking expensive-ass houses, babysit your snot-nosed brats, maintain your fucking pools, and do all the rest of the manual labor you fucking people refuse to do because you think you're above that kind of work! So in reality, we're the ones who bust our asses every fucking day just so YOU fucking snobs can have cozy and comfortable lives when some of you don't even deserve it! And buddy, I don't need to know you any more than I do now to tell you that you're one of the snobs who shouldn't have been born into the luxurious life that you live."
The man looked at him with wide eyes as Manuel stared at him intently with that angry expression. He gave a "tch" and got off of him, only to hear Pierre's footsteps right behind.
"I'm so sorry sir!" he said as he helped him up. Pierre glared at Manuel and held up a finger saying, "I told you to calm that temper of yours, and yet look what you do!"
"I'm not going to sit back and let people treat me like a fucking animal. I don't give a shit if they're customers or not."
"Sanchez you're fi—!"
"Don't even bother, because you know what? I quit. I don't want to ruin your reputation by staying here, and plus, I'm not gonna put up with these fucking people. They think they'll get my respect on a silver platter, but you know something? I don't give respect to those who don't know how to give it back. Fuck this shit man."
He threw his apron on the floor and stormed out of the restaurant, angry as a bull. Francis calmly finished his wine and said, "Well I've never seen that happen before. A waiter who attacks a customer because he was being talked down to."
"With that kind of attitude, I don't think he'll be getting a job anytime soon," Gilbert said. "But he's got guts, I'll give him that."
"Hmm… Antonio, didn't you say you wanted some kind of personal assistant?"
"Yes, but why are you asking now?"
"Maybe you can convince Mister Sanchez to fill the position. Surely you can handle him, since he seems similar to Lovino."
Antonio smiled. "Maybe I should. I'll be right back. Besides, I'm sure he can use the money to save up for college!"
He hurried onto the sidewalk and looked around for Manuel. He was found grumbling to himself in Spanish, stomping on a soda can with great force.
"There you are!"
Manuel turned around. "Oh, it's you. Antonio, right?"
"Yes!"
"Well what do you want? Come to tell me I was out of line or something?"
"No, actually I think it was brave of you to tell that man off."
"I just can't stand people like him is all. You don't treat me like shit and get away with it."
"But you're out of a job."
"If that's what you came to tell me, then it'd be best if you left me alone unless you want my fist to get personal with your face."
Antonio chuckled and said, "No no, I didn't come here to point out the obvious. I wanted to offer you another job."
"If I have to work at another restaurant I swear—"
"Oh you won't be doing any of that."
"Then what?"
"First, tell me your skills."
"Do you want a résumé or…?"
He chuckled again. "Nope. Just tell me vocally."
"Well, like I said earlier, I can cook, clean, and garden, in addition to sewing which even borderlines on tailoring. And I do all of those things well." Manuel was not modest when it came to his capabilities.
"And children?"
The teen's face seemed to light up a bit. "I'm pretty fond of kids actually, despite my horrible attitude back there. I never got much of a childhood, so I like playing with them and keeping them company."
Antonio smiled. "Well then you're hired! You start tomorrow!"
"Tomorrow? I don't even know what I'll be doing."
"You're going to be my assistant!"
"Your assistant? Like a butler?"
"No, not quite. I'm just a little busy these days, so I need somebody competent to help me around with a few things!"
"As long as you don't treat me like shit—"
"I won't, so don't worry. I can pay you handsomely too."
"How much? Like…ten bucks an hour?"
"No, fifty."
If it were possible, Manuel's jaw would've dropped. "Fif…fifty?"
"Yes!"
"Holy shit okay. I'll do it!"
"Great!"
"So where do I go?"
"Oh, right! Here's the address, and my phone number just in case." He scribbled it down on a napkin he had in his pocket. "Be there by seven-thirty tomorrow morning."
"Will do."
He watched as Antonio waved him goodbye and returned into the restaurant.
That's how it all started. Now, I'll admit, I was feeling overwhelmed when I first got to his apartment. What was it…like a kind of condo or something. Two floors and it had a pool. All I can say is, gracias a Dios for elevators, otherwise the climb up that fancy building would've been mission impossible.
I thought Antonio was just another rich dumb blonde, but he wasn't. I mean for one, he wasn't even blonde. He's Spanish. And second, he wasn't like all the other rich people I happened to come across. He was…nice. Humble? Yeah right. He knows he's hot and that women swoon over him if he's within a five mile radius of them…and even gay guys too. He made sure everyone knew it, what, with his nice tanned skin, his curly hair, his accent, his height, his smile, his eyes, those muscles, that ass…
…fuck okay no, forget I said any of that.
So like I was saying, Antonio was honestly, the nicest guy I've ever met, and he was just so kind and caring that at first I thought he was an illusion or something. I mean seriously, how can anybody be that nice? His family has all these organizations to help children and he loves giving out scholarships to students who are interested in fashion design, architecture, or the culinary arts. I still have no idea what the fuck his family does. All I know is that he's filthy rich and nice.
But anyway, I was his "personal assistant" for a while. I basically just kept him company at his apartment when he was home, and cleaned when he wasn't. I cooked for him and if that dumbass somehow ripped his clothes, I'd fix it for him. …so really I was just a butler, except I didn't have to dress like an idiot and he liked to invite me places, like fancy restaurants or playhouses. I've never seen a professional play before, so I was fascinated by them, and he could tell.
Yeah, so I liked working for him, and honestly, I felt a lot happier being with him. Though this fun time was short lived when the fucking chismosos apparently started questioning if he was cheating on his boyfriend with me, who I didn't even know existed until said boyfriend flew back to the States from Italy to see what was up months later.
Man did I want to punch this fucktard in the nose when I first met him.
Antonio walked downstairs and sniffed the air, a smile on his face as he strolled into the kitchen where Manuel was cooking. "It smells so good in here!"
He turned around. "Yup, dinner is almost ready."
"You're gonna sit with me again, right?"
"Of course. I made it, so I should at least get to eat my own food."
"Ha ha! Oh, that reminds me! There's this new restaurant that opened and I wanted to try it. Wanna go?"
"Sure! You know I love being a taste tester."
Antonio laughed. "Alright, then we'll go on tomorrow afternoon! Then I wanna take you to this place where—"
The doorbell rang and Antonio said, "Coming!" He opened the door with a smile, which grew wider when he saw who was behind it. "Lovi ~ !"
"Don't 'Lovi' me you fuckass."
"What's the matter?"
"Whaddya mean what's the matter? What's this about you acting all chummy with some nameless face?"
"Nameless face?" He raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"
"The Hispanic guy people keep saying you're hanging around!"
"Oh! You mean Manny! Well of course I'm hanging out with him. He's my assistant!"
"What the fuck do you need an assistant for?"
"Well, work has gotten busier lately, so I asked him to come and take care of the apartment while I was away—"
"Is he here?"
"Yeah, he's cooking dinner!"
"Good. I've got a few words to say to him."
"Wait, no Lovi—"
But the Italian didn't listen to his Spanish boyfriend. Instead he hurried to the kitchen and found Manuel serving the food onto fine china.
"Are you Manny?"
The teen turned around and replied, "Yeah, who wants to know?"
"Me."
"And you are…?"
"Lovino Vargas."
"Okay."
"What do you mean 'okay'? Don't you know who I am?"
Manuel shrugged and continued preparing dinner. You could almost see the fumes coming from the Italian's head.
"Seriously, you don't know?"
"No fucking clue. Are you gonna stay for dinner? I need to know how many plates to set out."
When Antonio walked into the kitchen looking somewhat worried, Manuel asked, "So is this guy staying or what?"
"Uh…yeah…"
"Alright."
Lovino turned to the Spaniard and said, "Does he know who I am?"
"Well he doesn't really care about celebrities and stuff—"
"No, I meant does he know who I am to you?"
"Oh…no…"
"Were you ever planning to tell him?"
"I didn't think it was important for him to know."
"Why the fuck not?"
"Because he's my assistant."
Lovino stared at him with a straight face. "I highly doubt that he's only an assistant to you."
"Well…it's more like he's become somebody I consider a friend, who just likes to help me out."
"Liar."
"I'm not lying!"
"Hey Manny," Lovino said. The other turned to him.
"What?"
"Did you know Antonio has a boyfriend?"
"Well I knew he was a bisexual, but no. Oh wait, are you the guy in the photos in the living room?"
"Yes."
"Ooooh, so you're his boyfriend. Well nice to meet you. I'm Manuel, but I see you've grown accustomed to calling me Manny."
"Yeah."
"So are you staying for dinner or what? I don't want this food to get cold."
"Sure, why not?"
Antonio hoped dinner would be civil. Luckily it was due to Manuel's obliviousness when it came to people being jealous of him…at least at first.
"…so who are you?" Lovino asked over dinner.
"A person who happens to be of Mexican origin."
"Don't get smart with me. I mean what are you doing here?"
"I help out Toni with chores and accompany him places."
"He accompanies you places?" Lovino asked the person of the subject matter.
Antonio smiled with genuine innocence. "Yeah! Like the other day he helped me pick out some new shirts, and we went to go see a play!"
"Is that all?"
"Yup."
"So you're not—"
Antonio sighed. "No, I'm not cheating on you. Stop being so paranoid…"
Manuel's eyes went wide. "Wait wait, let's back the fuck up here. Your novio thought you were cheating on him with me?"
"Yeah…"
The boy laughed and looked at Lovino. "Are you that insecure that you get all pissy if your man starts to hang around with another guy?"
"I'm not insecure!"
"Sure seems like it if you're this paranoid. I mean, I'm pretty charming and handsome, so I can see why you'd be paranoid ~"
"That's not funny."
Manuel laughed. "Yeah it is! It's hilarious!"
"When are you leaving?"
"Not any time soon."
"Well I'm back now, so there's no need for you to stay. I usually help Antonio with the chores."
"Now now, Manny doesn't need to leave."
Lovino looked at him with a bit of surprise in his face. Manuel only continued to chow down.
"Huh?"
"I like having Manny around! He's funny and he takes great care of my plants! Plus he's cute."
"Woah, I'm not cute okay?"
"I think you are though!"
"Well I'm not!"
"But…you talk to my plants a lot and your eyes sparkle and you make these little noises whenever you see a fluffy animal. Plus you have a cute nose!"
It was the second time that Manuel had blushed around Antonio. He covered his nose with both hands and said, "It's not cute!"
Lovino didn't like where this was going. "Look, I'll be frank with you Manny."
"I thought your name was Lovino."
"You know what I mean! Don't try anything funny."
Manuel rolled his eyes. "I'm not gonna steal your boyfriend, fuck. I'm not even gay." At least that's what he kept telling himself during the times he felt butterflies in his stomach when he was around Antonio.
Lovino only gave him a look and continued to eat his dinner, Antonio staying quiet and hoping the two would get along. There was no way he was gonna let Manuel leave. He really was pleasant company and was a big help around the spacious apartment. Plus he was cute, and that was always a mega bonus. Though if he wanted to keep that head of his, he figured he shouldn't say it as much.
He's a pleasant person, isn't he? If you didn't notice my rhetorical question was dripping with sarcasm, then you're not very perceptive. But anyway, Lovino is…an asshat, to say the least. That's not what bothered me though because I've dealt with a lot of people who had that kind of personality. What bothered me was the fact that he and Antonio would constantly have arguments that sometimes escalated into yelling, and let me tell you that it's scary to see Antonio angry…
This was worse when it happened in public, so I just sat there idly, drinking my beverage or whatever, trying not to attract attention to myself.
Eventually it got to the point where they kept breaking up and getting back together. Guess who was the glue that mended the broken pieces? Yep. Yours truly.
Antonio slammed open the apartment door and threw the keys on the ground. He stormed outside to the patio and tugged at his hair. Manuel quietly and calmly closed the door, lifting the keys and placing them in a drawer near the kitchen. Lovino and Antonio had argued yet again and caused a scene out in public, the former deciding to stay at his parents' mansion because he couldn't stand the sight of the Spaniard. The latter was just as peeved.
Manuel watched from the glass door as Antonio paced around outside, his hand movements reflecting his angry mood. He could hear his boss cursing out loud in Spanish. The young man had never seen him this upset before and decided to not speak unless Antonio asked him a question.
Instead he decided to straighten out the living room since in the morning the two lovers had lain there watching TV as if nothing was wrong. He heard Antonio return into the apartment and said, "I'm going to go shower."
"Alright."
When his shower was finished, Antonio felt a little calmer and walked back downstairs. He looked around for Manuel and found him in the kitchen again.
"What are you doing?" he asked curiously.
"Do you feel better?"
"…a little, yes. I'm sorry you had to witness that earlier…"
"It's fine. Doesn't bother me. But now that you're more relaxed, here."
He handed him a large bowl of vanilla ice cream with banana slices and chocolate syrup. Antonio smiled. "For me?"
"Yes. Ice cream always makes people feel better."
"Well I won't feel better if you don't eat it with me. This is a lot."
"Alright."
Antonio escorted them both outside and they sat down at one of the glass-top tables. They shared the ice cream in silence, until the Spaniard spoke again.
"I don't know why it's easier to make him explode now."
"Has he always been like that?"
"Well, yeah. Lovi has a short temper…"
"So that's why you were able to handle me all those times I got frustrated cleaning your stuff."
Antonio smiled bashfully. "Yeah, except his is worse than yours. And you're different than he is. You're a lot calmer and more open to affection…plus you're funny."
"Thanks for the compliments. Just as long as you don't see me like some kind of copy to be around when he's not here."
"No no! I don't! Please don't think that Manny! You and he have a lot of differences!"
"Okay okay! Don't get so panicky over what I said. I was just saying…" He sighed. "So what are you gonna do about it?"
"Do about what?"
"Your relationship."
"…I don't know. Ever since he came back from his long visit in Italy he's been more irritable."
"Maybe it's because you two have been away from each other for so long that he feels distant."
"Maybe. I don't know… What should I do Manny?"
"I think you need to ask him what's wrong. I've noticed you're all for hugging and kissing, but I think he just wants to talk. He doesn't come off as the cuddliest person anyway."
"…yeah, come to think of it, I haven't really asked him how his trip went."
"That's a start. I'm sure if you talk about that, he'll feel better." Manuel smiled. "Aaaand because he seems like the jealous type, tell him not to worry."
"Worry about what? You being here?"
"Yeah. It seems to bother him a lot."
"But there's nothing for him to be worried about. I love him, and you're just a friend. Well, a friend I'd like to consider close. I hope you feel the same way."
He hesitated. "…yeah, of course. I like the fact that we're friends too. You're a nice guy, so I don't understand why he treats you like that sometimes."
"Lovi's not all bad. He can be really nice and caring too."
"I hope so. I wouldn't want anyone to walk all over you. You're too good of a person for that."
Antonio looked at him and smiled again. "I wouldn't want that to happen to you either. You're a likeable person."
"Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?" He gave a smug grin and the other only chuckled.
Manuel looked up at the stars, his mind blank of any thought. Antonio only gazed at him, the smile never fading from his lips. He felt the Spaniard's eyes on him and turned to face said person, the other only smiling more when their eyes locked.
"You know, everyone always tells me they like my eyes," he began. "because they're a nice shade of green. That's what Lovino liked best."
"Well…why wouldn't they? You do have nice eyes."
"And what about yours?"
"Mine? They're brown, the most common color. What else is there to talk about?"
"Well I like yours."
"Why?"
"Because you have such big eyes, and the brown reminds me of chocolate or something. I dunno. I just like looking into them. They say they're the gateway to your soul, and you can tell a lot about a person by just looking into their eyes. And yours are very pleasant to look at."
He felt his face heat up again.
"You're a pleasure to be around. I mean, you're funny, you like socializing, you love to sing and dance, you may get angry easily but you usually calm down quickly, you're cheerful, and you're cute."
"…"
"Have you ever been in a relationship before?"
"No I…well, there was this girl I liked, but when I asked her to be my girlfriend…she said I was nice but…"
"But what?"
"Eh, money reasons."
"Money?"
"See, my mom didn't want me to go to school in our area because she thought they were bad, so I took a bus every morning to get to the nicer one in the next city."
"Every day you took the bus?"
"Yeah. I didn't mind it though. I liked taking it since I got to talk with a lot of different people. But anyway, because I grew up humble, that apparently meant I was poor and would stay poor forever, and even though people liked me at my school, I was still somewhat of a subject for jokes and stupid shit like that."
"Didn't you have friends?"
"Of course I did! The Jones twins, Alfred and Matthew, except I called them Alfredo and Mateo. Then there was Kiku and Katyusha who ended up being their 'honeys' after we graduated. The four of them are in college right now."
"Why couldn't you go?" For some reason it never occurred to Antonio to ask this.
"Because my grades weren't exactly outstanding and I didn't have the funds. College is fucking expensive. Alfredo and his family offered to pay for my schooling, but I don't like being indebted to people, so I said no."
"You should've taken that offer though."
"Alfredo's family has done a lot for me, things I probably would've never done if I went to the school in my area. I wasn't gonna continue to be the charity case."
"What if I paid for your schooling?"
"If you did that I would quit right now."
"Why!"
"Because I don't like people giving me the pitying look like you are now! I don't need none of that!"
"But Manny—"
"No buts! I'm going to work until I've saved up enough money to go to college! That's that!" He crossed his arms and Antonio looked defeated.
"That could take years."
"It's never too late to go to college, and I'm not giving up on my dream to become an architect slash guitarist slash landscaper!"
Antonio couldn't help but chuckle. He ruffled Manuel's hair and said, "Well I have a lot of confidence in you!"
"Thanks."
"Why don't you stay for the night?"
"But I need to get home. I can't let my cat sleep by herself."
"Aww you have a cat?"
"Yeah. Well, she's more like a kitten still, so one of my neighbors looks after her while I'm here working with you."
"You should bring her over! I love animals!"
"Seriously? What's your favorite?"
"Turtles!"
Manuel laughed.
It's amazing how much Antonio knows about turtles. I could write an entire essay on them after what he told me. But that's how he asked me to help him. Lovino had a different way, and though he was obnoxious in the manner he went about doing things, I realized it's not that he's a rotten person.
He's just insecure.
The poor guy has been taken advantage of since he's so rich, and he practically wears his heart on his sleeve (as hard as that is to believe) so I can see why he'd get so defensive when Antonio brings me everywhere. He's afraid he might lose the one guy in the world who is accepting of every single person that considers themselves to be undesirable in life. Everyone else has trampled over his heart just to find a way to his fortune, and Antonio was the first to truly care about him.
I took pity on the guy, so I decided to help him out.
"You live here?" Lovino asked as he walked into Manuel's small apartment.
"Yeah and?"
"It's the size of my bathroom."
"Holy shit what the hell do you need a bathroom that big for?"
"My mother likes her space."
"Are you sure it's not just you overcompensating for something?" he asked with a sly grin.
Lovino was displeased. "Manny I didn't come here for this!"
"Then what did you come here for?"
"…I wanted…well I need your help."
"What's this? The wonderful and extravagant Lovino is asking the plain and simple Manuel to help him with something?"
"S-Stop messing around! Look I need your help…with Antonio…"
"What for? You two fight again?"
"…sorta. I want to make it up to him and…well, it just seems like he's changed."
"How?"
"…he just…I don't know. It has to do with his food."
"His food?"
"Yeah. See, I'd usually make him Italian food and he'd love it, but lately he's been craving…more chili and beans, and I hardly use that in my food."
"So what do you want me to do about it?"
"…teach me how to cook something Mexican."
Manuel laughed. "Híjole I never thought this day would come!"
Lovino blushed and stuck his hands inside his pockets. "D-Don't make a big deal out of it! I'll even pay you to teach me!"
"Nah man, the fact that you're even asking me is payment enough!" He took two aprons from the hook on the wall and handed one to Lovino. "Let me teach you how to make something from the richest culture in the world, and that way you'll stop being ignorant and claim my food sucks."
"Sure whatever…" he replied as he tied the apron around himself.
Lovino watched as Manuel prepared the stove, taking out the required utensils. "I'm gonna teach you how to do something simple, but it'll taste good and I'll guarantee you that Antonio will love it."
The Italian got frustrated when he couldn't get the food to come out right, so Manuel had to continuously take trips to the market to buy more ingredients, Lovino feeling bad and paying for all of it himself.
Finally on his third try, he said, "Okay Manny, I think I got it right this time!"
"I'll be the judge of that." He tasted what was in the pan and said, "Oh shit, you did do it right this time."
A smile appeared on Lovino's face and Manuel had never seen him happier. "So it's alright for me to cook it again later?"
"Yeah I have faith in you man."
"Are you being sarcastic?"
He laughed. "No I'm being serious. Just remember each and every step so you don't fuck up. Got it?"
"Yeah. Uh, I'll help you clean up."
"Good. I wasn't gonna let you leave anyway until you did."
When they had finished cleaning, Lovino put his coat back on and said, "Manny…uhm…I'm really grateful that you taught me how to do this."
"Por nada ~"
"Usually when I ask people to help me for things like these…it doesn't go as expected."
"Well I'm glad you weren't disappointed."
"No it's…that's not what I meant. When I ask people to help me keep somebody, they either give me bad advice on purpose that eventually causes me to lose the person I hold affection for, or they take notice of the vulnerability of the situation and try to weasel their way in to get my girlfriend or boyfriend… I'm just…very appreciative that you didn't try to do that."
Manuel stood quiet for a moment, but then said, "I'm sorry to hear that. Nobody should try to get in between two people in a relationship. But you can count on me. I know how much Antonio loves you, and how much you love him, so I'll try to help you out as much as I can!"
Lovino gave him a genuine smile. "Thanks. I don't know how I'll ever repay you."
"Well not fighting in public while I'm around might help. I'd rather not hear yelling."
"Y-Yeah, I'll try to be better with that."
"Good. Now go on and make that dinner for Antonio. You're a good cook, so you shouldn't have trouble with it now."
Lovino smiled again and said goodbye, closing the door behind him. Manuel stared at the wooden piece for a while, contemplating on what the Italian had told him.
"…I did the right thing, verdad mamá? I shouldn't get in between two people…no matter how much I like one of them… It would just be wrong and I'm not about to be the infamous person who broke them up…"
Manuel decided not to think too much about it and began to put away the clean dishes.
Well, Lovino came back to my place and told me Antonio loved what he cooked him, so then I gave him more lessons on other kinds of food from my culture, so he kept calling my house every time he had a question or to just say how much he appreciates my help, y'know, all that stuff.
Eventually it got to the point where if I didn't help either side mend the relationship, they were literally helpless. Neither of them knew it was me who kept helping the other, and I'm not about to tell them either. It's best if they don't know.
…but there came a point when it started to bother me. The closer they got, the more I didn't need to be there. Lovino stopped staying at his parents' mansion and came back to the apartment, so when Antonio would work, Lovino would take care of the house, and when Lovino would work, Antonio would do it. I was still allowed to come over since Antonio liked my company and still did need help with a few things. It's just…they weren't as frequent anymore since Lovino took up a lot of his time.
It was around the next year in December when I started to think about quitting. Antonio had invited me to go up to the mountains since it was snowing, and it wasn't too often I got to be out of the city. It was still light out and everyone who went was having fun playing in the snow.
That was when I finally admitted to myself that I loved him.
I loved him more than I have anyone or anything else, and that for me to always be there wasn't healthy. I started getting jealous of his relationship with Lovino, how wonderful it all was now. They were back to being cuddly, and even Lovino was more open about it. He knew how to cook my food to get to the guy's heart, and the other knew how to soothe his pissy boyfriend whenever he'd blow a gasket, all because I taught them how.
But it was during this time that I realized I'm in no position to say anything. I mean honestly, what was I? I was an eighteen-year-old boy who doesn't have a single penny to his name and works for rich people, just like what my mom used to do. Both Antonio and Lovino had not only love, but money. They would be able to keep the other financially stable if anything should ever happen, in contrast to me where I live in a shitty apartment building and literally get fired from all my jobs because I can't deal with certain kinds of people. For fucks sake I don't even have a car.
I have no right to express to any of them how I feel about Antonio, so I kept my mouth shut. Though…Lovino's little brother Feliciano has some kind of hyper awareness when it comes to things dealing with your heart. He was the first person to notice.
Manuel hid behind a tree, trying to form another snowball to throw at Gilbert. For some reason the German (he said he had Prussian roots but Manuel didn't even know what that was) liked pelting him with snowballs, but maybe it's because Lovino was teamed up with him and wanted to get back at Manuel for rolling a giant ball of snow down the hill, causing Lovino and Gilbert to take the mammoth of ice right in the face.
"Oh there you are Manny!" Antonio said. "I was looking for you!"
"What for? I'm kinda busy right now," he replied, stockpiling snowballs behind the rocks.
"I found a nest of bunnies!"
"What?"
"Yeah I saw a rabbit running off so I followed it, and when I did, she led me to her den with her babies. They're so cute buhyoo ~ ! You need to see them!"
Manuel was tempted, but he decided being alone with him wasn't a good idea. "Thanks but I'm gonna continue to form my snowballs here and set up a trap for Lovino and Gilberto."
"Just come on! You can do that later." He grabbed his arm and dragged him away, not caring if Manuel protested.
They were a little far from where the rest of the group was. Antonio put a gloved finger to his lips and pointed to something a few feet away. Manuel looked over and saw the mother rabbit emerge, cautiously checking her surroundings. Slowly she scurried off, perhaps in search of food. Antonio grabbed Manuel's hand and led him to the den, not noticing the redness in the other's face as he did so.
"It's shallow enough to see. Look!"
Manuel peered into it and saw a bundle of bunnies huddled close together. He made an adoring face and said, "They're…they're so cute!"
"See? I told you!"
"I wish I could hold one, but it wouldn't be smart to take them out of their den. It could be dangerous…"
"That's true."
"Thanks for showing me though."
"Oh you're welcome! I know how much you like animals that are fluffy."
"Well I like animals with feathers on them too."
"I couldn't find any birds though… But next time I'll make sure to let you know when I do."
Manuel chuckled. "Alright. Well I need to get back to my post. I don't want them stealing my snowballs!"
"They can't find us here easily, so let's just make some more in case we find them on our way back."
"Sounds like a good idea!"
The two began to make snowballs to take with them back to the group, except Manuel had no idea how they were supposed to carry them that many yards away.
"Hey Manny."
"Yeah?"
A snowball was thrown at his face.
"What the fuck was that for!" he shouted, trying to dust the snow off. Antonio couldn't stop laughing.
"Well?"
"Ha ha! I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself!" He continued to laugh until his own face was met with snow.
"There, now we're even."
"Manny that wasn't nice! I had my eyes closed!"
"Oops."
Antonio narrowed his eyes and Manuel grinned cockily at him. Then the Spaniard gathered some more snow and made another ball, but when he threw it, it collided with the one Manuel had thrown. Eventually the two just started throwing their snowballs at each other instead of trying to carry them back to their post.
When they heard Feliciano's voice calling out to them, they stopped their laughter. Antonio said, "We need to make more snowballs!"
"Well it's your fault for throwing them all at me!"
"Same could be said for you!"
"Okay okay, so what do we do then?"
"We need to hide. C'mon!" He grabbed his hand and rushed behind two trees with large boulders in the center. "Let's make some more here. He shouldn't be able to find us that easily."
"Sure thing."
The two were running out of snow around them, so Manuel decided to move and gather some more where it was plentiful. Antonio saw Feliciano getting closer and tried to call out to his partner to return, but he couldn't hear him. He got up and rushed toward him, causing him to tackle Manuel to the ground. There was a small slope before them, which unfortunately caused them to tumble down.
When they reached the bottom, Antonio noticed he had fallen on the other and said, "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to—"
But Manuel had been laughing and said, "Don't worry about it! That was fun! In another circumstance I probably would've hit you, but because this is snow, I don't care."
"Oh, that's reassuring…"
He continued to chuckle which caused the Spaniard to do the same. "Are you having fun Manny?"
"Yeah, of course! I like hanging around with you. I always enjoy myself when you include me in things."
"Ha ha, well I like being around you too. I always have the most fun when I'm around people I love."
"…love?" His cheeks were already pink from being out in the cold air, but they turned a darker shade just then.
"Yes, of course. I love all my friends, and you're no exception!"
"Oh…"
"…you look cute like that."
"Like how?"
"…well, I mean, your cheeks are flushed and your cute little nose is pink." He grinned.
"M-My nose is not cute or little! Stop saying that!"
"But it's true! You'd rather have a big nose?"
"…well no but—"
Antonio laughed. "You can be so silly sometimes."
Manuel looked upset but then Antonio said, "I like that about you though. Ah, you have some snow on your forehead."
He wiped it off and the other below him stood completely still. This was too close for comfort, at least for Manuel.
"…I think we should get back. Can you please get off?"
"Oh, sorry! I forgot I was still on top of you!"
"Yeah…"
Finally Feliciano caught up to them and said, "There you guys are! I've been looking for you everywhere! But how did you get down there?"
"Manny and I fell!" shouted Antonio. "We'll come up right now though!"
The two climbed back up the small slope and it was then that Lovino reached his brother. "Fuck there you guys are. Toni what did you do? Manny looks like a mess."
"This big lug tackled me to the floor and caused us to fall down that slope since he saw Feliciano and wanted to hide."
"Damn it you need to be more careful idiot!" he said as he slapped his arm. Antonio only laughed.
"I'm sorry. I promise I won't do it again."
"Good, but now our time is wasted and we need to head back for dinner."
"Alright." He held his boyfriend's hand. "Let's go!"
Manuel watched as they left and met up with Gilbert in the distance. Feliciano was bouncing behind them but stopped when he noticed he didn't hear the Mexican's footsteps behind him. He walked over to him and said, "Let's go Manny! We're having Italian tonight!"
But the other didn't hear him. He kept looking at Antonio's retreating form, still holding on tightly to Lovino's hand. Feliciano looked back and forth between the two. When he noticed a frown start to appear on the teen's face, he started to get worried. Could it be that…?
"…Manny?"
"Huh?"
"Are you okay?"
"…yeah, I'm fine."
"…you don't look fine to me."
"What?"
"Your face…and just your eyes…"
"What about them?"
"Uhm…well on this trip, and just ever since the first time I met you…I've had my suspicions…"
"About what?"
"…well okay uhm, I'm just gonna ask. Do you love Antonio?"
Manuel looked shocked and hesitated, which was all Feliciano needed to know.
"So I was right."
"Does it matter?"
"…a little. I mean…doesn't it bother you?"
"That's not important."
"Yes it is. If it bothers you, how come you haven't said anything?"
"Would it make a difference?"
"I don't know. You haven't tried it."
"And I'm not going to."
"But why?"
"Why? Feliciano, think about it for a moment. Your brother has had horrible experiences with relationships, and Antonio is his dream guy. They both love each other more than I've ever seen anybody love another person, and I'm not about to cause doubt between them, all because of my stupid emotions. Lovino isn't a bad guy, and he doesn't deserve that to happen to him."
"But it's also cruel for you to just…just watch and say nothing!"
"Cruel to who?"
"To yourself! You've been working for Antonio for more than a year, and I'm sure you've started to feel this way about him for a while! Manny, you can't do that to yourself!"
"Feliciano, it doesn't matter!"
"Yes it does! You love him, but then you see this happening right in front of your eyes and you just…watch!"
"I do that because it's a way of telling myself to stop wishing for things that will never happen!"
"…what?"
"Both of them are rich as fuck and have known each other much longer than Antonio has known me. They not only have love for each other, but they can keep each other financially stable. They've got popularity, a name in the world, and just a special relationship I'll never understand nor will I ever be a part of!"
"…were you the one who taught Lovi how to cook Mexican dishes?"
"…"
"…and were you the one who consoled Toni on what to do if Lovi was ever upset?"
"…"
"…Manny…why?"
"…because I love him that much that I'd give up my own happiness to make sure he keeps the person who I know is the best for him. Unless you think your brother doesn't deserve that?"
"…no…no my brother deserves all the happiness in the world."
"That's what I thought."
"But so do you Manny! It's not fair to you!"
"Whoever said life was fair? This is just another thing that will make me come out stronger in the end."
"But with a broken heart! I know you're a strong person, but humans can only take so much pain! Your life hasn't exactly been easy from what I know, and…and pain of the emotional level hurts so much more than anything physical."
"My life is just one big obstacle course that I've been able to endure for this long, and will continue to endure until I'm put in a coffin and buried six feet underground."
"Stop…stop being so proud!"
"Pride is what has gotten me this far. Feliciano, I don't mean to sound like an ass, but why the fuck do you even care about whether I'm happy or not?"
"Because you're a nice person and you've made Toni happy and my brother happy!"
"Yeah and that's how it's gonna stay so long as I don't say anything and you keep your mouth shut."
"Manny…"
He began to walk away, but then stopped and said, "My mother always told me that no matter how I feel about something, I need to do what's universally right. And this…this is the right thing to do. But you don't have to worry about me anymore. I've found a solution to this."
"What is it?"
"I'm gonna quit."
"You're going to quit!"
"Yep."
"Manny you don't have—"
"Yes, I do."
"But Antonio wouldn't want—"
"Well you know what? I'm gonna be selfish and not care about what he wants. This is what I want. I want to quit so I don't have to constantly see them all lovey-dovey, being jealous and upset all the time, maybe even hoping something would go wrong so that way I can be the one in that Spanish idiot's arms. But that's a horrible way to think, and I'd be considered a bad person if that happened. I'd rather not have people hate me. Causes unnecessary drama and problems. So when we get back, I'm gonna quit. Antonio is going to stay over at Lovino's place for the rest of the month until New Years Day, and I'm left to take care of the apartment. I'm gonna leave before he comes back."
"What will you do though for a job?"
"I don't know, but I'm currently looking in to it. Can we drop this subject now?"
"…okay…"
Feliciano watched him catch up with the others, putting on the cheerful façade when he had to be around both Antonio and Lovino. The younger Italian brother sighed, wishing there was something he could do to help Manuel.
I kept my word and quit after that. Feliciano still hadn't told anyone, sans Francis. He's very keen too when it comes to topics dealing with romance, and he wouldn't stop bothering me about why I declined all invitations to spend New Years with them.
This guy even came to Antonio's place just as I was about to leave. I had left the Spaniard a note on the table, making up some lie about why I couldn't stay any longer.
Francis tried to get me to stay, but I still said no. Eventually he ended up offering to take me back to my apartment. And that señores y señoras, was the end of my temporary bliss.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked with sympathy on his face. How much Manuel hated it when people looked at him that way.
"Yeah, perfectly sure."
"Manuel…"
"What?"
"Maybe you should talk with Antonio."
"Why? Like I told Feliciano, I'm not about to get in between him and Lovino. There's no way I'm gonna become that kind of person. I was raised better than that."
"But at what expense? Your happiness."
"Fuck why do you people care about whether or not I'm happy?"
"Because you deserve to be happy."
"Well I am alright? I'm content."
"It's not the same level as happy though."
"Content is just where I want to be. I have someplace to live don't I? My health is perfectly normal, and at least I have a cat to keep me company."
Francis only looked at him and sighed. "Eventually this is going to eat you up inside."
"What the fuck do you want me to do? Proclaim my love to him and cause problems? You all want Lovino to be happy don't you?"
"Yes but—"
"Okay then. Thanks for the ride by the way, and thanks for including me in your luxurious lives. At least I got to try it. That's good enough for me."
"I hope you'll find your own happiness soon, Manuel."
"Yeah." The teen got out of the car and closed the passenger door, walking into the apartment building. Francis shook his head, the sympathetic expression never leaving his face. He took out a photo from his wallet and smiled. It was him and Gilbert, standing side by side with their sweethearts. The German had a lovely and shapely brunette at his side, and the Frenchman had a short irritable-looking young man with impressive eyebrows. Antonio hadn't been in the picture because he was away with Lovino that weekend.
"Gilbert and I both married somebody who wasn't of our class, and we couldn't be happier. I care about Lovino's joy but Manuel deserves it just as much as he does. I suppose there's nothing that can be done about this though. I just hope he doesn't suffer too much. He's a good kid." With that last thought he drove off, heading back to the Vargas Mansion.
During that time, Manuel had unlocked the door to his apartment and shut it, his cat coming up to him to rub against his legs. He chuckled and knelt down to pet her.
"It's just you and me again," he said.
He put the keys away in a drawer nearby and flung his jacket onto the couch. He walked to his room and took off his shoes as he sat on the bed. Resting his back against the headboard, he sighed.
"Gonna have to search everywhere for another job. Looks like college will have to be put on hold for a little while longer."
The room was quiet as he stared up at the ceiling, his cat jumping onto the bed and curling herself into a ball next to him. He stood like that for a while, just contemplating on what he had done, and remembering all the wonderful times he had with Antonio.
"…I did the right thing. I helped their relationship get back on track. That's…that's what you would've told me to do, right mamá?"
Silence.
"I didn't get in the way. I made sure to keep myself at a distance, and ended it before I did something stupid that would ruin everything. It's better this way. I'll get over him soon… Yeah, I will."
Silence.
"I mean, it wouldn't work anyway. I'm like six or seven years younger than he is, and I'm far from his level in society. People would start talking about him, and I wouldn't want that. It's also never too late to go to college."
Silence.
"Lovino deserves him. I mean, yeah, I'd like Antonio for myself, but they've known each other for a long time. Who am I to get in the way? I have no right. That's okay though. Everything's gonna work out in due time. It always does."
Gloss.
"…bad luck, that's what this whole thing is anyway. I'll overcome this, and I'll make a better life for myself mamá. I'm strong, and I can get through this. It's only a minor setback. You'll see. It'll all work out."
Smile.
"Who needs those kinds of sentiments and affection anyway? Not me."
Tears.
"Definitely not me."
Manuel looked up at the ceiling, his arms wrapped around his legs. He didn't whimper, he didn't gasp, he didn't sob. He closed his eyes and let the tears slowly fall down his cheeks. Though he didn't let any sound escape from his mouth, he sat there, crying silently, something he hadn't done in a long time. He was never one to cry about anything even though his mother, Alfred, Feliciano, the lady who took care of his cat, and everyone else he could think of told him it was alright to cry. He felt a pain in his heart and still he didn't make a sound.
He opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling still, for once sadness appearing in full throttle on his face. The longer he let his tears fall, the harder it was to not sob, until eventually his lip began to quiver, and he covered his face with both his hands. He sobbed and cried, making it a bit difficult to breathe.
The cat looked up at him and tilted her head. She tried to get his attention with her paws, but he continued to cry into his hands. Eventually she started meowing, but still he didn't pay attention to her. Finally she gave up and curled around his feet, just to let him know that she was there for him to hug and hold if he needed to. It was then he realized he was alone. His mother was dead, he had no idea who his father was, his best friend was far away at college, and the person he loved was completely out of his league, and forever out of his grasp. This was the life he was chosen to live, and it was the life he would have to live alone.
Mala suerte. Yep, that's all it was.
A/N: Well, there it is. This is the gist of my idea for an AU with this pairing. I hope the beginning of this with the shitty customer wasn't...well didn't make anyone too upset. (It made me upset while writing it. I tend to do that to myself...) But if it did then I deeply apologize. I wish this website had like a blog section for the authors to put like footnotes or something instead of having them write stuff at the end of a chapter. Well anyway, if you're curious about Manuel's personality in general, there's a link on my profile to his bio that I wrote. Oh, and in that bio I also drew a picture of him, so it's more or less on how he looks, but it sucks because my art skills are crappy. It has come to my attention that there are other versions of male Mexicos so I tried to draw him in a way where he doesn't look like a copy or something of the rest. orz Okay well I'm rambling again ah ha. I also wanted to mention that Manuel doesn't cry. It takes a lot for him to cry...publicly. He thinks it shows a form of weakness and vulnerability so he only cries when he's by himself.
Mm, I usually only write happy stories but I wanted to try my hand at writing something more dramatic and with an ending where the protagonist doesn't get a 'happily ever after'. I guess it worked because I made myself cry when I was writing this. Wow I am so pathetic. xD; I'm not too big on Spamano (I'm partial to it I suppose) but I like using it as a plot device for some reason. I love Antonio and Lovino as individual characters, but together? Eh, not so much.
So if you didn't like how this ended, I wrote up an alternate ending, because typical me I can't let my own characters have shitty life even after the story is over. I won't post it as an extra chapter unless people want to read it, so just let me know in a review or something if you want. I'm also paranoid about my Spanish grammar so if I made a mistake, please tell me. orz
Thank you for reading ~
